Face-to-Face Experience with the Divine--Compassionate Swami changes the Face of Fate

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                                                AUM SAI RAM

Dear Saibandhus,

My humble pranams at the Lotus Feet of Bhagavan.

By the Grace of Bhagavan i am giving an account of a very personal Experience of mine with the Kali Yuga Avatar Swami. This experience echoes the Grand Truth explicitly expressed in the sacred and great scriptures describing the unlimited compassion and love of Paramatman bound by which the fate of any person who surrenders himself at HIS Feet,is Re-shaped, rewritten. 

While writing this, i wish to declare that, there is absolutely no ill feel towards any person appearing in this episode. There is nothing, but pure love on all of them. The elaborateness on the persons, of the circumstances, of the situations are factual; they are furnished only to uphold the Realities of life absolutely without any negative feelings.[ uttering facts is one thing ; possessing no ill feel is another thing. Both are Realities of life] Basis of everything is Divine Drama only. At the end of the particular divine drama, all the actors can only sit-at-ease and enjoy every chapter of it, only to take part in the next drama, for as long as the creation exists, the Divine Drama continues.    

      This happened around 37 years ago. We are four children to our parents. Two elder sisters, me and a younger sister. At the time of this story, my two elder sisters were already married off to Engineers by profession. I was a student studying  in M.E.C.( Manipal Eng.College, subsequently named Manipal Institute Of Technology). My Father had retired from service.  He used to go for morning & evening strolls everyday. One day during such stroll, my Father met one  gentleman  from our community, who had also retired as an high official from Govt. Service  from Northern India, and had just then come to our hometown. He was planning to settle down there. Father and He became good friends. He had a son and two daughters, the eldest among them was the son. He was studying in an Engineering college, and the daughters were studying in High School. My Father and the Gentleman (Uncle) were daily meeting and discussing many things. During a general talk both of them expressed that why they can't strengthen their friendship further  by entering into marital ship between the families i.e, by giving my sister to the Uncle's son in marriage and by giving his 2nd daughter in marriage to me, a kind of mutual exchange. They agreed that since we were still students , the marriages can be conducted after completion of education. Later they informed this verbal arrangement to their respective families and close relatives. Almost all accepted this idea.

   Personally i didn't like this exchange type alliance. However, I didn't give much thought on this, for my main thoughts were on my studies only, where i was facing some deep troubles.  Two years might have passed thus. Suddenly the Uncle passed away due to a massive heart attack. All were in utter shock. There was no body to give courage to them as they were new to the  Town. My father started helping them in all matters. Therefore he frequently visited their house for moral support as well to settle some official matters. The sisters also had to visit our house for many clarifications on official matters unknown to them. 

  Thus day by day the bond between our two families, except for me, was increasing.( In between i had my own problems of repeated failures in the Engg. course. I became free of this problem when the All Merciful Bhagavan gave me Darshan,Sparshan and Sambhashan wherein Swami assured me that i would definitely pass the Engg.course and would get a job also). But this was the beginning of a new worry.

I was helplessly observing with disgust the bond between the two families increasing gradually. Especially the bond was stronger from the Uncle's family as they were dependent on the moral support of my Father. By now all our relatives and friends knew about the mental understanding of the marriage between the two families. And my aversion to marry the girl from that family also increased. Though i didn't like to marry her ( Not that she was not beautiful), i was sympathetic towards them. Whenever both the families met during celebration like marriages of our relatives, pujas, festivals etc.my relatives used such opportunities to crack some jokes with me and that girl which i disliked the most. But i was not dare enough to oppose them nor the jokes. i silently suffered it.Therefore, i tried to avoid such situations by not attending such celebrations, as far as possible. In unavoidable circumstances if my presence was necessary in some functions, i ignored and avoided eye to eye contact with the girl. During vacations or failure in the exams i had to be at home. Our town was a small one and sometimes i had to visit shops or temple there and at such times there were many occasions when i saw the girl at some distance away. And as soon as i saw her at some distance, i used to avoid that road and escape to some other side lanes. Whenever i return home after a few months on vacation, immediately Father used to tell me to pay a courtesy visit to their house. But i wouldn't visit. Upon facing frequent questions from Father as to why i didn't visit, only then i would visit but taking care to do so after ensuring that only Auntie was at home. My dislike to marry her was gradually understood by my friends, relatives,sisters and finally by my Parents also. Others didn't have any say in this matter. Father didn't give importance for my feelings saying that my sister would get a good husband if i sacrifice , and quoting a few examples of some of our relatives who had done so. Of course that boy was a fine, intelligent and well behaved gentleman. 

    There was none who understood my plight. Day after day i was becoming desperate . The reason why i am writing so descriptively is only to reveal to dear readers how much i was disinterested to marry. I never had the courage or heart to oppose my Father knowing well that how much he was struggling to finance my education and how much he encouraged me despite my failure. Hence i came to the conclusion that i should pray only to Swami who could be my ultimate saviour.  

It so happened at that time  that my eldest sister's husband was transferred to Bangalore. It was my annual vacation. I wished to spend it with my sister and family in Bangalore. Hence i came to Bangalore. After about a week of stay, i received a letter from my sister (There was no telephone in our house then ). She gave me a very pleasant news. She wrote, " Bhagavan Shri Sathya Sai Baba is in Whitefield Ashram. You may have His Darshan there " . I was extremely happy. Next day itself i proceeded to the Ashram to beg Swami to give a solution to my problem. My sister's eldest son, aged about 11 or 12 years  accompanied as a guide. We reached Brandavan on the morning and many devotees were assembled. There was a big Idol of ShreeKrishna Paramathma installed under the shadow of a huge tree. A big cushioned chair was placed near the Shreekrishna's Idol. The air was filled with the Bhajan songs by devotees. After some time Swami arrived and after giving Darshan sat on the throne.  Bhajan was continued for a long time. When Bhajan was concluded after Arathi was offered to Him, Bhagavan left for His residence. Soon after Swami returned to His  residence and a large portion of devotees also left the place as Swami was not granting Interviews in Whitefield Ashram. Not knowing this, i walked towards Swami's rewsidence, and stood outside the closed gate of the compound wall of Swami's residence. Many devotees, may be around fifty, also waited outside. All of us were looking towards Swami's residence anxiously. I was praying Swami to grant Interview. After waiting for about thirty minutes a Sevadal devotee guarding the gate told us that Swami doesn't grant Interviews and so we may leave the place. A few devotees left the place. Still many devotees,me and my nephew  stayed back. I continued praying Swami for Interview. We all were waiting patiently. About one hour later again the Sevadal devotee approached us and repeated the same dialogue. On hearing this some more devotees left the place. Still 25 or 30 devotees were waiting patiently. Those days Sevadal devotees were very liberal. Except softly telling us the futility of waiting, they didn't force us to leave. During all these period i was continuously praying Swami for Interview which was so important for me. Again after a long time the Sevadal devotee approached us sympathetically and requested us to leave as there was no point in waiting. Many devotees vacated. More than three hours elapsed. Still Swami didn't come. The only solace was, we could see Swami sometimes coming out of His residence and speaking to some, may be the office bearers.

    Disappointed and waiting for long , many devotees left the place. Finally there were only five devotees remaining. [ In between my nephew got tired of waiting and told me that he would leave for home. I told him that he could do so since i understood the route back to home by then. He left the place. After sometime,when i looked by my side pleasantly surprised to see him there. He explained that he had accompanied me as a host and it won't look nice to leave the guest, hence returned after walking some distance. ]. It was nearly a waiting of four hours. i was still praying. Then, all of a sudden we saw Swami coming out from His residence towards the gate and near us. The MERCIFUL LORD looked at us and called all we five to his residence. We stood just outside the main door. Swami called us, one at a time, inside the house. When my turn came i entered inside. Swami created the Sacred Vibhoothi and gave to me. Looking at me and raising His both hands and keeping each hand on both the sides of His head as if in a dancing pose, SWAMI told me     " you are getting a lot of bad headache. Don't worry. I am looking after. ( something also Swami told me in a low voice which at that time i didn't give attention,hence don't remember exactly. Because all my  thoughts were on the matter which i wanted to beg SWAMI, lest it  might slip from my memory.) Now what is the matter?  " . i joined both my hands and begged    " SWAMI, my Father wants to conduct mine and my sister's marriage in exchange with another sister and brother; i do not at all want to marry that girl. Kindly arrange my sister's marriage without exchange method. SWAMI told me " Yes. I will do the engagement within a few months. i paid my humble obeisances to SWAMI and came out happily that my problem was solved. My nephew also received the Blessed Interview. Swami told him that with the God given Intelligence he would come up in his life. 

 i returned extremely happy. i didn't tell my Nephew and Sister that transpired between me and SWAMI regarding the marriage. After staying with my Sister & family for some days, i returned to home.But i didn't reveal to my Parents the marriage topic talked  in the Interview. After a few days i returned to my college hostel, as the college was started after the vacation. I was very happy that my sister would get an alliance and as assured by SWAMI she would be engaged within a few months; that too without exchange and i would be a free man. i spent the days happily utilising the time for my sadhana as well studies. A few months passed by. i was eagerly waiting for any letter ( There was no telephone facility ) from Father which would reveal the good news of getting a suitable groom for my sister. Only after that i had plans to reveal to Father the content of my Interview with SWAMI. 

          I had a relative residing a few kilometres  away from my college. i used to visit them whenever i feel homesick as the Aunt was like a Mother to me. One day i visited the Auntie at her home. She said; " Congratulations to you.

Me: (surprised) Auntie, why are you congratulating?

Auntie: You are talking as if you don't know!

Me: (still surprised) Really Auntie i don't know.What is the matter?

( She gave me an information which completely devastated me; i felt the whole sky had collapsed on me; i felt the Earth under me opened up and i fell to an abysmal depth.The information is),

Auntie: Two days before, your Father had arranged a small engagement ceremony in his house and invited only a few selected relatives. My daughter was invited and she attended the function and I received the information from her today. As per your Father's desire engagement of yours and your sister's has been solemnized with that boy and his sister. The engagement was done in a hurry. Probably he couldn't inform you. ( seeing my sunken face she regretted for giving me the information. She thought i knew about it. She said she knew about my unwillingness, but i should sacrifice for the sake of my sister).

 Without uttering a word i returned to my hostel heavy hearted. Calculating the time i realised that the time of engagement matched with that predicted by Swami a few months back.

  After reaching hostel, i closed the room door, clasped Swami's photo and cried for a very long time uncontrollably. I prayed, OH Swami, You had  assured me that You would conduct the engagement. Did you mean this engagement which i didn't want at any cost? i humbly begged you for my sister's marriage without exchange method so that i could be free. See what happened? i had told You my problem very clearly and you had clearly assured me that You Yourself would do the engagement. Is this the engagement you willed? How can you do this Swami? Why you did this to me Swami? How can i tolerate this Swami? How can i marry Swami? Which i didn't want to happen even in my wildest dream, has happened in fact! Swami, You are Aapathbhandhava, You are Sharanagatha Rakshaka. You are the GOD who will not desert those who firmly trust You. Am i such a sinner not fit for your Grace? Are you unhappy with my Bhakthi? Like this and much more which i am unable to recollect, i wailed and wailed and wept. Exhausted by weeping,finally i slept. Next day i didn't go to college. Morning there was a knock on my door. The postman delivered me a letter.The letter was from my Father. First he inquired my health, welfare and studies. Then mentioned that as it was an auspicious day, three days before he conducted the engagement ceremony which went of well with the presence of a limited no. of relatives, there was Pooja and Bhagavan's Bhajan, he couldn't inform me as there was no time, but marriage would be conducted only after  we get the degrees  etc, etc.   

       One or two days passed by and my mind in utter distress. Though i couldn't understand the mystery behind these happening contrary to my expectation, i thought there must be some good reasons. One day when i was meditating on Swami, suddenly it occurred to me that " Swami had said to me that he would conduct  the engagement within a few months and exactly that has happened, but Swami didn't say that He would conduct the marriage; engagement doesn't mean a marriage; engagement need not necessarily end in marriage, engagements could be broken easily, but not the marriage so easily " . But, how it can be broken?Surely i didn't want myself to tell Father to break it, since it would severely hurt my Parents. Father had sacrificed so much for my education, and i loved my parents so much that i didn't have the heart to break myself. At the same time, i didn't want to marry her. It was highly impossible to expect the brother of  that sister to break, since he was such a nice gentleman and was obliged to my Father in many ways. Then how on earth the engagements can be broken?  Only the possibility was if Swami wills so.  Therefore,if Swami wills the engagements could be broken, but how to make Swami to Will so? Yes. only a Fervent Prayer; an Intense Prayer to Swami. No sooner this idea flashed in my mind, than i started praying Swami to break the engagement. I prayed like this. (1) SWAMI, kindly break the engagement in such a way that no blame should come on me or my parents.              (2) SWAMI, kindly give my sister a good husband without Mutual Exchange and make me Free.

Completely surrendering to Swami, i was praying as above, all the time. As soon i got up from bed every morning i chanted the above prayer and continued it during all the available  slots during day and night , till i went to sleep. It is not an exaggeration, if i say that just like NAMAJAPA and MONTHRA,  i chanted the above prayers. Really it was a sadhana for me. Even if i woke up suddenly from sleep any time in the night,i continued the namajapa till i got sleep. ( The reason for my elaborating like this is only to reveal that Swami knew all about it. ). Nearly an year passed by. i didn't express my feeling and anguish to any one except Swami. i was mentally expressing to SWAMI my feelings--anything and everything.  

   Sine vacation arrived, i went home which is about 75 km. from my college. I spent several days at home. Here also i was always praying Swami with the chanting of  that Manthra on my mind and heart.One day we received a delightful news that SWAMI would be visiting Manipal  to inaugurate a new GopalaKrishna Temple situated very near to my college and hostel. The news gave me a big thrill ,because as far as i knew, it was the first visit of Swami to Manipal and i wished to get the Darshan of Swami and if not impossible an Interview, although such possibility was ruled out. Many devotees from our town also wanted to get Bhagavan's Darshan. My Father, being a convener of the Shri Sathya Saibaba Samithi in our town arranged a bus to Manipal. Hence, on the scheduled day of Swami's visit,  a bus load of devotees from our town travelled in the bus to Manipal. Myself,Father,Mother and Sister also accompanied.

 We reached the Temple premise. A Dais in front of the Temple was put up and seating arrangement were done for SWAMI and for some conveners of Sai Samithis. A big crowd of people had already gathered. As per my practice, i was continuously chanting my above stated  Manthras fully realising the importance of it at such a Blessed Opportunity.  Arrangement was made for Men and Women devotees to sit on the ground and  in front of the Temple, seperated by a path way. The path way was made from the dais to the end of the ground for SWAMI to walk through the path way and enable all devotees to obtain the Blessed Darshan of SWAMI. I seated myself on the edge of men devotees and the path way so that i could obtain nearest Darshan of Swami, when He walks on the path. Soon SWAMI  entered the stage and was and accorded Loving and thunderous welcome by all. My Father had the Blessed Opportunity of sitting with BHAGAVAN and receiving Padanamaskar along with a few others on the dais . SWAMI inaugurated the Temple, descended from the dais, entered the central path way and started slowly walking, giving the much awaited Darshan to the devotees. As SWAMI was approaching the side where i was sitting, my heart started beating fast, and i was chanting my favourite Manthra intensely. I was looking at SWAMI intently with unabated eyelids, lest i would miss if SWAMI were to look at me, and importantly if SWAMI were to give me any message or talk. SWAMI was walking slowly looking at devotees on either side of the path way. As SWAMI slowly reached near me, HE looked straight,deep and continuously into my eyes till HE went past me. SWAMI further walked along the path towards the end of the ground till reaching the last devotee. (All these time i was chanting my Manrthra.) As SWAMI further walked along, i turned 180 degree so that i could have the Darshan of Swami's Back. SWAMI walked till the end of the path way giving Darshan to all.  Next Swami started walking back. I was looking at SWAMI continuously, and chanting the Manthra continuously. During the time of returning also  Swami looked at me continuously and deeply till HE went past me. After reaching the stage SWAMI gave a discourse in Kannada language. After the discourse and Arathi, SWAMI returned. We also returned to our home town. i was extremely happy that SWAMI gave me the Darshan near my college hostel premises. Only i couldn't then interpret Swami's intent and the continuous looking at me. 

 

Two days after SWAMI'S DARSHAN, i was still sleeping late on the morning in my bed room  There was a knock on the main door of our house. The post man had knocked the door, he delivered a letter to Father. Father opened out and read it; and he immediately shouted and called my Mother, who came running from the kitchen. Mother saw my Father in great anger and very agitated state. When Mother asked the reason for his anger,Father showed the letter in his hand and told her that the letter was from their  would be son in law; he had written which  was just an unimaginable and an  impossible thing. He had written in strong terms that he was not interested in our alliance and the marriage, hence the engagement conducted earlier should be treated as annulled; he gave the reason that since i was failing many times in the exams, my future wouldn't be bright. Therefore neither he wished to give his sister in marriage to me nor he wanted to marry my sister. He profusely thanked my Father for all his support and help rendered to them during their tough and rough time and assured my Father that, if necessary he would even help my Father to find a suitable groom to my sister. As soon as i heard all these behind the doors of my bed room, my joy knew no bounds and i immediately & humbly prostrated mentally at the LOTUS FEET OF SWAMI and paid HIM my profound and tearful Gratitudes from the depth of my heart. So much highly i was delighted that i felt like jumping up and dancing in my room. 

     After talking to my Mother, father called me and briefed the matter. Hiding my delight, i consoled my Father,Mother and Sister. I told Father to immediately start searching a suitable groom to my sister without mutual exchange, stressing this as a strong point. Except me, everyone in my family and relatives were very sad. Though i fully sympathised with them, nothing was possible for me at that instant to make them happy.  

i fully knew that the alliance was broken by that boy ( so that my Father,Mother,me and sister would be absolutely free from any blame from any side). Only due to the ABUNDANT GRACE and BLESSING of SWAMI, who heard my anguish, cry,prayer etc.and as proof of which SWAMI gave me HIS DARSHAN WITH INTENT LOOK, just two days before the receipt of the letter,in the premises of my Institution,where till then (as far as i know) SWAMI had not paid a visit in His physical body. Also, i firmly felt that just like any other Parent who visits their child in his school/college out of Love and Concern for the child, similarly my FATHER AND MOTHER SWAMI came there personally to see HIS child-me in the college.  The Manthra which i was chanting till then, turned to the Manthra of Gratitudes. 

How Inscrutable are the Leelas of SWAMI!!!.  Not a single blame on any one in our Family and the problem so easily solved for ever!!!.  What i thought impossible to happen had exactly happened.

 In a week time i was back to my hostel as the final academic year had commenced. To alleviate Father's and family's distress and to continue their faith in Swami,immediately after reaching hostel, i wrote a very detailed letter to Father giving all the minutest details of how i didn't like to marry the girl,but dare not to say,lest my family members would be sad ,hence how i pleaded SWAMI during the Interview in Whitefield, SWAMI'S assurance that HE would conduct the engagement, ( and what a severe and acid test lay underneath SWAMI'S assurance to me), how i misinterpreted SWAMI'S assurance and was later devastated on receiving Father's letter informing of our engagement and how i prayed,wept, begged, SWAMI by chanting my Manthras uninterrupted,what a Divine Darshan SWAMI granted me in Manipal and how SWAMI looked deep and continuous into my eyes ( thus indicating that HE has looked into my problem and with a solution ready on hands), during both the DARSHANS and within two days the receipt of the letter finally putting an end to my Problem. And i consoled Father that it was SWAMI'S WILL and LEELA that HE conducted the engagement ceremony and broken HIMSELF by influencing the thought process of that boy, hence Father should not worry as SWAMI will surely find a suitable groom to my sister, of course without mutual exchange and i had been praying SWAMI for that. This explanation greatly consoled my Father, understanding the Divine Hand behind the whole episode.

 

By SWAMI'S Grace within a few months my sister got married to a reasonably wealthy groom who was an employee in a well known Public Sector Bank and with this  Return of my Freedom.    

 

After an year or so, i went to Puttaparthy for Swami's Darshan. After a long wait and struggle, SWAMI Granted me an Interview. I paid silently my Wholehearted Gratitudes to Swami for all the benedictions. In the Interview after giving some valuable Spiritual and a far foresighted prediction of my Future, and finally at the time of leaving the Interview room, the OMNISCIENT SWAMI looked at me and with twinkle in HIS EYES said " All your mind was too much agitated and got spoiled because of that girl no? " ( Evidently meaning the girl to whom i got engaged). What i could say than shedding tears of Gratitudes and looking at SWAMI WITH DEEP PREMA!!!    

Dear Saibandhus, in the above episode i always firmly believed in the Efficacy of Prayers, picturising that in Puranas when Sadhaks were doing intense Tapas, such Tapas had created great Tapo-Agni which was so hot to bear!! and God had to appear before the Tapasvi( one who does Tapas) to grant boons. Though i was an highly insignificant creature comparatively likened to the single grain of sand in the vast mountain size of sands, i always firmly had the firm conviction rooted very deep in my Conscious,Sub-conscious,and Super conscious mind that if i give my one hundred percent prayer to SWAMI, He would definitely fulfill my wishes. SWAMI was and has been very kind. 

 

i am grateful to you my dear Saibandhus for very patiently reading my above Experience.

 

Sai Ram.

 

 Pranams at the Lotus Feet of Bhagavan. 

 

 Ranganatha.Rao