Fw--How to Install THE operating system for you--please read

[Guest guest]

A good friend of mine sent me that today, it's not too long and it's nice...

 

 

>

> Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE?

>

> Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am

> ready to install now. What do I do first?

>

> CS Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your

> HEART ma'am?

>

> Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right

> now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

>

> CS Rep: What programs are running ma'am?

>

> Customer: Let me see...I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE GRUDGE.EXE, and

RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

>

> CS Rep: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from

> your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory,

but it will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually

overwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE.

However, you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM.

Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn

those off ma'am?

>

> Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

>

> CS Rep: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do

this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have

been completely erased.

>

> Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing itself

> automatically. Is that normal?

>

> CS Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will

> reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message?

>

> Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed?

>

> CS Rep: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You

> need to begin connecting to other HEARTS in order to get the upgrades.

>

> Customer: Oops...I have an error message already. What should I do?

>

> CS Rep: What does the message say?

>

> Customer: It says ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS what

does that mean?

>

> CS Rep: Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that

> the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet

> been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming

> things, but In non-technical terms it means you have to ?LOVE? your own

machine before it can ?LOVE? others.

>

> Customer: So what should I do?

>

> CS Rep: Can you find the directory called ?SELF-ACCEPTANCE??

>

> Customer: Yes, I have it.

>

> CS Rep: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

>

> Customer: Thank you.

>

> CS Rep: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy

> them to the ?MYHEART? directory: FORGIVESELF.DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT,

> REALIZEWORTH.TXT, and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite any

> conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also,

> you need to delete SELFCRITIC EXE from all directories, and then empty

> your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never

comes back.

>

> Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat

> files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that

> WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over

my HEART!

>

> CS Rep: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to

> handle it from here. One more thing before I go...

>

> Customer: Yes?

>

> CS Rep: LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to

everybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people

> and they will return some really neat modules back to you.

>

> Customer: I will. Thank you for your help.