Interesting letter....

[Guest guest]

Sri Ramakrishna Charanam Saranam, Sri Sri Ma

 

Dear Jay,

Namaskar

There is no harm in posting this letter in the list. This is a classical

example of Thakur initiating one of His disciples just by a mere glance.

Tulsi Maharaj's inner being (or kundalini ?) was lifted to create a sudden

creeping sensation in his bosom. And his ordinary life was transformed into

a life of a tireless & wonderful Missionary by just a mere glance!.

 

Perhaps our Smamiji must have kept this incident of his Gurubhai Tulsi in

his mind while composing the lines, ... " jnaananjana vimala nayana veekshane

moha jaay... " in the famous arati song of our Order!

Regards

Prakash.

 

========exchange of letter with Tulsi Maharaj====

 

Sri Ramakrishna Charanam Saranam, Sri Sri Ma

Revered Maharaj,

Please accept our humble sashtanga pranams.

Today is the 137 birthday anniversary (Thithi puja) of Tulsi Maharaj (Swami

Nirmalananda). On this occassion, I am enclosing below an interesting letter

written by Tulsi Maharaj as a reply to our Madhavanandaji, the 9th President

of the Mission and the then Editor of Prabuddha Bharata regarding his

association with Thakur and Swamiji. Please note that He is addressing

Madhavanandaji by his Pre-monastic name as Nirmal.

Pranams

Prakash

 

The Lotus Feet of Sri Sri Guru Deva are my refuge

Prabuddha Keralam Office

Trivandrum,

23 Nov 1923

My Dear Nirmal,

Received your affectionate post card here yesterday. Very glad to know that

you are all doing well. I came here a few days ago. As I was gradually

becoming weaker I have thought of staying here for sometime for treatment

under Dr. Thampi's care. It will be as the Lord Decides. From the day my

ailment has been detected, I have restricted my diet to the best of my

knowledge. Now my diet is being regulated under Dr Thampi's directions. This

is the modern method, i.e., half ration, fasting etc, alongwith some

medicine. The Sugar in the urine has been reduced to some extend. But the

weakness is there as before. Doctor says that it will continue until blood

sugar is perfectly normal. The disease is only arrested when the sugar is

reduced in the urine. When the blood sugar will become normal there will be

no longer any special ground for anxiety.

 

You have asked me to write an account of how I had the good fortune to

meet Thakur with a view to incorporating it in the new life, but about that

I cannot find out any incident worth mentioning which you can include in the

new book. Besides I do not remember the year, date, thithi etc. For your

information I am stating how our first meeting took place and also one or

two incidents subsequent to it.

 

One late afternoon, about 5.30pm, when chatting with some boys of our

quarter (Bosepara), it was suddenly noised about that a Paramahamsa had come

to the house of Balram Babu. Many people of the neighborhood were going to

see him. After sometime it occurred to me, " why not I go? Let me see what

kind of Paramahamsa he is. "

 

Our home was quite close to Balaram Babu's. Two minutes' walk. I threw a

chaddar on my person and ran. Reaching the upstairs, I found that Balaram

Babu's parlor and veranda were packed with visitors. There was hardly any

room in the parlor. Peeping in I saw that in the centre of the room was

placed a carpet on a small cushion and a stout pillow on it. But the

paramahamsa was not there. The seat was vacant. I was then eighteen or

nineteen years old. As I was young and was not acquainted with anyone, I did

not dare to ask anybody as to where the Paramahamsa was. I, therefore, went

to the western veranda and leaning against the wall of the room, I waited.

 

Some five or seven minutes later, I saw a man coming with tottering

steps; like one dead drunk from the inside of the house, along that very

western veranda. He was not looking at anything, but was absorbed in

himself, He came to where I stood, looked at me for half a minute or so and

then slowly staggered on into the parlor. He did not exchange a single word

with me and I stood nonplussed and forgot even to salute him. As he entered

the room, I felt a creeping sensation within my bosom as if my whole body,

from head to foot, became paralyzed. When this sensation awaited a little, I

ran back to my house where after some rest I recovered.

 

This was my first meeting with Sree Ramakrishna. But I did not know at

the time that he lived at Dakshineswar and his name was Sree Ramakrishna.

After this meeting I did not make enquiries as to who he was, where he lived

etc. I think this incidents took place a year or little less before the

meeting of Sri Ramakrishna with Sri Girish Babu. I never kept any diary of

life incidents, and therefore I do not remember anything about date, month,

year etc.

 

A few days after the incidents, one day after finishing midday meal, I

went to Hari Maharaj's house to see him. He was my friend from boyhood days,

and his residence was close to ours. We used to meet each other often. On

that day he said, " let us go to Dakshineswar and see Paramahamsa Deva. "

 

We went to Dakshineswar by boat from Baghbazar Ghat. (Hari Maharaj,

Gangadhar, one or two more used to visit now and then Rani Rasmani's Kali

Temple). I thought he must be another Paramahams and he whom I saw at

Balaram Babu's house must be a different person for I never been to Kali

temple before. Unfortunately Paramahamsa Deva was not there that date. He

had gone to Calcutta. I missed him. We were looking on the different

pictures of Gods and Goddesses hanging from the wall in his room. A photo of

his was also hanging from the wall. Suddenly my eyes fell on it and i was

startled. On asking hari Maharaj, he said, " It is the photo of Paramahamsa

Deva. " I replied, " I have seen Him " He asked, " where? " . " At the house of

Balaram Babu, " I replied. " Then it allright " he said.

 

Shortly after this one day I walked from my house to Dakshineswar alone.

It was half past eleven or twelve, when I reached the Kali temple. Without

stopping anywhere I went to Paramahamsa' Deva's room and found him taking

his meal. I saluted him and sat on the floor before his seat. This was my

first bowing down before him. I was so ignorant that it did not occur to me,

that I must not salute him, while he was engaged in eating or sit by him.

However he did not mind these breaches of etiquette.

After finishing his meal he washed his hands and mouth, sat on a cot

with placid face and began to smoke and chew betel leaf as also to speak

with me smiling. At that time there was no oneelse in the room. Only the

Holy mother waited on the northern varanda. (Then it was screened with

bamboo thattis) to feed him and to attend on his other needs.

 

After a few preliminary questions he suddenly said something curious

which astonished me. He said, " The other day a boy resembling you came here

and asked if I could act as his go-between " . I did not quite understand him

and wondered why he used that slang expression. As I kept silent, he at once

read my mind and said, " No, No, by the word go between, I mean one who

brings about the meeting of a person with his beloved Lord. He is the Guru,

He is everything. There is no difference between Him and God. "

 

I understood that it was a hint thrown out to me at that light. After a

while he came down from his cot placing his left hand on my shoulders as a

mark of favour, stepped out of his room and slowly walked towards the

Panchavati. With great tenderness he said, " Come here now and then " .

 

Then my hear t was filled with joy. After reaching the Panchavati, he

saluted the spot where he practised sadhna, and sat on a lower step. Then in

an exalted mood he began to speak with Divine Mother. I did not understand a

bit of that half articulated speech, I could catch the word " Mother " at

intervals and knew that he was talking to his Mother. Shortly after he

returned to his room from Panchavati, when I bowed before him and returned

home.

 

After this incident I used to go to kali Temple now and then - sometimes

with hari Maharaj and sometimes alone. Besides, when he used to come to

Balaram Babu's house I would go and meet him. When he was lying ill at

Cossipore I used to go there also.

 

On hearing one afternoon the news of his Mahasamadhi on the previous

night, I went to the Cossipore Garden. I bowed down to his form for the last

time and placed my head on his feet. Then I returned home from the cremation

ground at 10pm.

 

After his passing away I used to feel his want very deeply and used to

pray to him in my heart. He was compassionate enough to grant my prayer and

presented himself before me in another form fulfilling my heart's desire.

This was no other than Swami Vivekananda. He is the be all and end all of my

life. Sunnyas, renunciation, dispassion, spirituality etc, whatever I

received is all through his grace, his grace. I used to look upon Sri

Ramakrishna and Swamiji as one and do so still.

 

When I used to visit Sri Ramakrishna I did not know Swamiji, I heard his

name and saw him only a few times from a distance. How I had the good

fortune to find refuge in this embodiment of love and perfect incarnation of

grace is a long story. I shall relate it on another occasion if I get the

opportunity. It was he who dragged me out of my home and kindly gave shelter

at the Baranagore Math. It had come into existence only a month or two ago.

 

As I have a love for you I write this incidents for your personal

information. Do not communicate these to anyone else or incorporate them in

the new life of Sri Ramakrishna. Omitting these details you may mention in

general on what occasion I had the good fortune to meet the Master.

 

If my health improves, I shall pay a visit to Mayavati Ashrama and

personally relate to you what I have heard about Swamiji from his own lips.

Thus far for the present. Please accept my sincere love and namaskar and

convey the same to others in the Ashrama.

 

Very affectionately yours,

Nirmalananda