Weekend Humour : )

[Guest guest]

From time to time we send humour to this list

devoted to spirituality..........................jay

 

Weekend Humour : )

 

This is from Rev. Harold McNabb

 

A local priest and pastor were fishing on the side of the road.

 

They thoughtfully made a sign saying, " The End is Near! Turn yourself

around now before it's too late! " and showed it to each passing car.

 

One driver that drove by didn't appreciate the sign and shouted at them:

" Leave us alone you religious nuts! "

 

All of a sudden they heard a big splash, looked at each other, and the

priest said to the pastor .....

 

" You think we should just put up a sign that says 'bridge out' instead?' "

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A woman was driving her old beat up car on the Highway with

her 7-year-old old son, Little Johnny. She tried to keep

up with traffic but they were flying by her. After getting

caught in a large group of cars flying down the road,

she looked at her speedometer to see she was doing 15 miles

over the speed limit.

 

Slowing down, she moved over to the side and got out of the

clump that left her in the dirt. She looks up and sees the

flashing lights of a police car. Pulling over, she waited

for the officer to come up to her car. As he did he said,

" Ma'am do you know why I pulled you over? "

 

Little Johnny piped up from the back seat, " I do! Because you

couldn't catch the other cars! "

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

If you can start the day without caffeine or pep pills,

If you can be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when loved ones are too busy to give you time,

If you can overlook when people take things out on you when,

through no fault of yours, something goes wrong,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment,

If you can face the world without lies and deceit,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

If you can do all these things,

 

s

c

r

o

l

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down for to find out who you are.......

 

THEN YOU ARE PROBABLY THE FAMILY DOG