Pujya Ramsukhdasji Maharaj

[Guest guest]

Questions: How to maintain love, happiness and peace in the family?

Answer: The main impediments in any relationship is when a person

wants things to happen his way only. He wants his words to hold

weight, his desires to be fulfilled or wants everything for his own

self interest.

 

When one thinks about the other person, and doing good to the other

person, by honoring and providing comfort to them, and wishing them

well and imbibing in thoughts of their welfare, then all members of

the family become happy.

 

Question: What is the primary reasons for fights in a household?

 

Answer: Generally within every household there are fights primarily

due to two reasons

1) The other person should do all the work, earn money, make a

living and bearing all the expenses and

2) I will do the spending, shopping etc. I am to receive all the rest,

respect, and all glories come to me.

From these two points, most of the troubles begin. If these were to be

reversed, that is, I do all the work and you relax and rest. That

respect, hospitality, admiration, happiness are not taken, rather they

are given. If such things are done amongst each other †" giving of

respect, admiration, rest, relaxation,carrying out orders, making

others happiness etc., then love will surely increase.

 

Question: How to be truly gratified in a family life?

Answer: Man's nature is such that he likes the fulfillment of his

desires. When things happen according to his desires, he feels happy.

There is desire for wealth, respect, fame, and to live a full life.

But of all of these desires, the main desire is that what ever my mind

desires, that should happen. This is not something that one should

feel good about. If we give up the insistence of our mind, and if we

do what others desire, then we will become gratified for life. Only

two things we have to watch out for, that whatever others are asking

us to do, is rightful and just (nyaayukt) and we have the ability to

fulfill that desire.

 

Question: What must one do to attain this gratification, this peace

and harmony in family life?

 

Answer: For this, there is a straightforward solution. Just decide

once and for all, that we are not going to take anything from this

world †" we are only going to serve this world. The reason to serve

this world is because we have taken a lot from this world in the past,

so now it is time to give back in return. We have to give the family,

to the world, not take from it.

 

If members live lovingly with one another, the atmosphere will be full

of peace and happiness and love evolves automatically by renunciation

of selfishness and pride.