Narayanasramam

[Guest guest]

Problems of the household

 

Question: During the last several months, various household problems

are troubling me, and at times I feel I will break into many pieces.

 

Poojya Swamiji: What you describe as problems are not verily so. They

are like knots in the threads woven into a cloth. Household life is

like the flow of a river. The course of the river is neither straight

nor in the same level. It is made so by the nature of the ground

through which the river flows. The river is formed and it flows on

only because the earth surface itself is uneven. The hills and ridges

tend to arrest the flow, but in effect, they can only hinder and

intercept. The flow gains momentum to surmount the obstacles.

 

Dear S, your life is such a flow on the earth. Unlike the river on the

physical terrain, it is centred on your own personality in which

contributions as well as hindrances come from your own senses, mind

and intelligence. Aging is a factor, ill health another. When you

cannot plug your ears against a possible gossip or eruption of others,

the irritating input results. Once it succeeds in registering itself

in the brain, the tussle becomes yours - in the form of reactions,

counter-reactions and what not! Likewise, the eyes cannot always be

shut from disturbing sights. Once these inputs are there, the mind

begins its habitual work of remembering and thinking criss-cross.

These are the rocks, mounts and pits on the terrain through which the

life has to flow.

 

Once the terrain is well understood, the wisdom must gradually build

the counter-elements, which will even out the disturbances. This is a

kind of growth and expansion of our personality which is essential to

make our life flow on and on, despite anything on the way.

Facilitating the flow and becoming enriched in the process is the

sublime course of any discerning man.

 

Even to the most ill-healthed mother, is the child born a load? The

mother may lack physical strength and ability, but the mind generates

its emotional strength and sustenance.

 

Let the household present its hindering facets, but your mind must

spin its emotional threads to fill the gaps and transcend the

disturbances. It is not the absence of hindrances that you should look

for (as perhaps is the trend now) but the presence of the counter

factors. The first depends on sources outside, other than you, while

the second has you alone as the source. Why not the source in you

become creative and expansive?

 

Seen from outside, you are a body first. Next, you are the mind and

then the intelligence. Further within, you are the SELF. Mind you, THE

SELF. Look at the Subject reality scientifically.

 

The body is gross; subtler is the mind. Still more so is the

intelligence. Then what should be the subtlety of the Self? A colour

cannot be easily dissolved in earth; but in water it can be. It can

also be washed off by water. The dissolution process works with

greater effectiveness in the mind. In that, the intelligence works as

a great friend. But, for everything positive or negative, the Self is

the ultimate dissolver. Like sleep, It dissolves and regenerates as well.

 

The process is subjective alone; it does not depend on anything other

than you. When the obstacles and disturbances from the external

sources pose before you, why not you tap your own being and try the

dissolving process?

 

It is generally done by resorting to some counter sentiments or

emotions. Desire or passion works first in household minds. That is

quite natural. But equally, the same mind will have to develop a

tendency for desire-dropping and dispassion as well. Householders

either do not recognize or refuse to act in accordance. Naturally

there is imbalance - sometimes very strong. They deserve it!

 

Life is a flow authored by nature. Why not leave it to itself? Do we

not accept growth and decline of the body? Why, not equally accept the

need for passion and dispassion too? The mind has enough capacity to

provide the needs of the hour.