Pujya Ramsukhdasji Maharaj

[Guest guest]

After Taking Refuge, Let There Be No Doubts

 

Believing and thinking that my body is fit, my sense organs are under my

control, my mind is pure and uncontaminated, my intellectual

understanding is proper, I am well-educated, I am famous, I am respected in this

world etc., therefore " I too am something special, " etc etc. After feeling all

these things and then taking refuge in God, is not true surrender (sharanagati).

 

After taking refuge in God, a devotee should not even have thoughts such as - my

body should be like this, my intellect should be like this, my mind should be

like this, I should be able to meditate like this, my intentions and feelings

must be like this, I must have such and such distinctive qualities, my behavior

must be like this, I should have that kind of love within me that on hearing

about God or while chanting His name, tears start to flow from my eyes, my voice

and throat tremors and chokes with emotions, but such things have not happened

in my life, therefore how could I be surrendered to God? etc. Such conversations

are not tests of exclusive refuge in God.

 

The one who has completely surrendered to God, he does not even take

notice whether his body is ill or healthy? Is the mind agitated or

still? Is the intellect filled with knowledge or ignorance? Is he

foolish or wise? Is he capable or incompetent? etc. He does not look at such

things even in his dreams, because in his eyes, such things are nothing but

useless baggage, that he does not truly take with him. If he pays attention to

such things, then arrogance will crop up, thinking that I am a devotee who has

taken complete refuge in God. Or else he will become dejected that even though I

have surrendered to God, I have not acquired the qualities of a true

devotee.

 

Gita 12:13-19 talks about the qualities of a true devotee of God -

 

'Adveshta sarvabhutaanaam maitreha karuna evacha,

nirmamoha nirahankara samdukha sukhakshami. ' etc.

 

So a doubt may arise that such qualities have not come in me? The point here is

that if you begin to see qualities of a true devotee in you, you are likely to

become arrogant, whereas if you do not see these qualities, you will become

dejected. Therefore after taking refuge in God, one should not look towards

these qualities even by mistake. But one must not wrongly confuse and

misunderstand the meaning of what is being said here. This absolutely does not

mean that it is OK to go ahead and engage in hostility – antagonism, hatred,

attachment, or whatever one pleases. The point here is that the attention should

simply not go to the qualities. A devotee that has taken refuge in God, all good

qualities will come to him naturally and on their own, however whether they come

or go away should be of no concern to the devotee. Therefore clearly one must

not test their surrender to God (sharanagati) questioning whether certain

qualities or behavior are present or not.