Ramana Maharshi's disciple Ramaswami Pillai shares his experiences

[Guest guest]

From boyhood I was spiritually inclined. Although coming from a meat-eating

family, I turned vegetarian while still a boy. I was mainly a worshipper of

Shiva but learned about Christ and Buddha too and revered them. Twice I

visited the great Muslim shrine at Nagore, and I understood that Allah was

only another name for God. My one ambition in life was to see God face to

face. This was granted to me while still a schoolboy in March of 1917 when I

first went to Skandashram and set my eyes upon Bhagavan. Reclining on the

couch, he looked indescribably majestic. Since then he has been God in human

form for me, my God, Guru and All. I did not ask him for anything. I was

filled to overflowing by just seeing him. He turned on me that look of heart

melting Grace that he so often bestowed on newcomers. After a few days I had

to return home. There I learned the " Marital Garland of Letters " and spent

my time reciting it either mentally or aloud and even writing it out.

 

 

It was on my second visit to Skandashram that I first made pradakshina. A

visitor from Madurai whom I knew wanted to go round the hill with Bhagavan

and I joined him. At that time the lower slopes were still forested and we

took the forest path for a good part of the way before coming out on the

road. Next day I had a sudden urge to go round by myself. I started out as

before but soon lost my way on the forest track. As I started I had noticed

that one of the Ashram dogs was following me. Now it ran in front and began

to lead. At once it flashed on me that this was Bhagavan's work. With tears

of gratitude and joy I followed my guide. He took me by the same path as the

previous day until we came to the road and then disappeared; and I saw him

at the Ashram when I got back. At the time I told nobody about this. It was

my first experience of my spiritual relationship with Bhagavan and I was

more than ever convinced that he would guide me through the unknown paths of

life. Such an incident may appear trivial to the reader, but when it

actually happens it strengthens one's faith in Bhagavan, who alone can help

by his infinite Grace in opening one's inner vision.

 

 

For a whole year at Skandashram Bhagavan took only one meager meal a day. I

was on a visit there the day he broke this fast. I had decided to stay the

night even though there was no food for an evening meal for the rest of us.

I didn't feel hungry. At about 7:30 one of the devotees, Ramanatha

Brahmachari, came back with some pieces of broken coconut and some rice that

he had been given at a ceremony he attended in town.

 

Bhagavan suggested that we should boil it up on the charcoal stove we had

there and share it, as was the usual custom. He told us to see whether there

was any sugar or sugar candy left from gifts by earlier visitors to flavor

it with. We looked but there was nothing at all. It was dark and raining

outside and we could not go into town for anything. I was near to tears that

Bhagavan should ask for something — so rare an event — and we should not be

able to provide it. At that very moment the door opened and two students

came in with a bag of sugar candy and a bunch of bananas that they had

brought to present to Bhagavan. The meal was cooked and eaten, the two

visitors also being invited.

 

Bhagavan remarked that we had asked for sugar candy and got bananas also,

which could be cut up and served like a pickle with the food. After eating

he said that it was just a year, 365 days exactly, since he had limited

himself to one meal a day and that from now on he would eat in the evening

also. That was how things happened with Bhagavan. He did not work miracles,

things just happened right.

 

Miracles are generally thought of as deliberate acts willed by a person, but

happenings like this are the result of spiritual forces naturally and always

at work. The Jnani is God Himself in human form. He never wills anything but

things happen in his presence and the ignorant attribute them to him. His

state is pure awareness. It is a matter of experience. One may get a glimpse

of it in his presence.

 

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