Why We Fear Death

[Guest guest]

Why We Fear Death

 

" Men fear death as children fear to go in the dark. " - Bacon

 

There may be a thousand reasons why we fear death, but most of all we

 

fear death because we fear the unknown, and death is an unknown entity

 

to most people. We fear that dying may be painful and we do not know

 

what will happen to us at the point of death.

 

Some people fear death because they imagine the dying process to be

 

very painful. Death is not painful. In fact, death is often very

 

peaceful and silent even for those suffering from cancers or other

 

terminal illness.

 

When the physical body is deteriorating day by day from a terminal

 

illness, and pain arises from superficial wound such as bed sores, or

 

deep pain such as bone or nerve pain, death may even be a welcome

 

relief for the sufferer.

 

We need to distinguish the pain of the physical body from the process

 

of dying. The dying process is a distinct process that is separate

 

from the deterioration of the physical body. At the point of death,

 

there is no pain.

 

What happens at death is the cessation of the breath and all other

 

physiological functions of the physical body. The heart stops pumping

 

and the blood circulation stops moving. The body stops generating

 

heat, and thus progressively turns cold.

 

For those who believe that we are more than just a physical body, and

 

that we are in fact spiritual beings, the dying process means much

 

more than just physical death. Death is just a natural process that

 

allows us to discard the physical body as we move into the spiritual

 

realm.

 

Since our fear of death is due to the fact that we do not know or

 

understand death, it makes sense to familiarise ourselves with it. The

 

more we understand death, the less we fear it. We should therefore

 

cultivate a friendship with death, and be totally familiar with it,

 

just as we are familiar with our friends.

 

We can cultivate a friendship with death in three simple steps:

 

1. Establish a link with God.

2. Cultivate a habit of acceptance, instead of blame.

3. Be a blessing to others.

 

 

Establish a link with God.

 

By establishing a link with God, we touch base with our own

 

spirituality. God can be whatever you perceive God to be. For

 

Christians, Muslims and Hindus, that may mean an omnipotent God. For

 

Buddhists, it may mean the Buddha seed within. Atheists may have to

 

come to term with their own spirituality.

 

Establishing a link with God means re-gaining your spirituality. It

 

leads you closer to the spiritual aspect of yourself. Whether we

 

accept it or not, we are more than just this physical body. When we

 

die, we leave this physical body behind and only our spirituality

 

continues on. It is therefore essential for us to be familiar with our

 

own spirituality. It is the only part of us that continues after

 

death. This 'fact' is in accordance with all major religions.

 

 

Cultivate a Habit of Acceptance.

 

It is funny how when good things come to us, we readily accept them as

 

though we deserve them or we have worked hard for them, yet when

 

calamities befall us we quickly look for an external source to blame.

 

This is especially so when misfortunes such as terminal illness befall

 

us. We may blame God, and later blame ourselves or people around us.

 

We should cultivate a habit of neutrality regardless of whether good

 

or bad things come our way. Otherwise, we can become very bitter about

 

life when negative things happened. Looking for someone or something

 

to blame only serve to prolong our own suffering. Death is an enemy

 

when we resist it, but the moment we accept it, it turns into an ally.

 

However, cultivating a habit of acceptance does not mean not doing

 

anything to correct or improve our conditions. It does not mean, for

 

example, that when we are diagnosed with a terminal illness we do

 

nothing about it. It is only sensible to seek treatment, if it is

 

available to us. On the other hand, it also means we must know and

 

accept when curative treatment is no longer possible. We fear death

 

only when we refuse to face it.

 

Unfortunately, there are unscrupulous people who would take advantage

 

of our fear of death to sell their 'cure'. In my experience with the

 

terminally ill, I have come across countless stories of dying people

 

being duped into parting with their savings and properties in the hope

 

of achieving a cure.

 

 

Be a Blessing to Others.

 

This is our greatest and most reliable ally at the time of death.

 

Knowing that we have been helpful to others and that we have tried to

 

live a blameless life takes away the fear of death. If our life has

 

been an honest one, free of any conscious intention to hurt any living

 

beings, we have nothing to fear when death approaches. Our mind will

 

be at peace, undisturbed.

 

On the other hand, those who lead selfish lives, and harm others to

 

get little advantages for themselves, find themselves imprisoned in

 

tiny, dark cells when they move to the other side.

 

Therefore, while we still can, we should give our best to the world

 

and to people around us. Lend a helping hand to others and help to

 

lighten their loads. Bring joy to the joyless and comfort to those in

 

need of comfort. There are many who are less fortunate than us. Count

 

our blessings and be a blessing to others.

There may be a thousand reasons why we fear death, but most of all we

 

fear death because we fear the unknown, and death is an unknown entity

 

to most people. We fear that dying may be painful and we do not know

 

what will happen to us at the point of death.