One Liners : )

[Guest guest]

Weekend Fun for the list: : )

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~one liners~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

My mama always said we were put on this earth to help others.

My question is, what are the others here for? "

 

" The best way to escape your problem is to solve it. "

 

Low self-esteem is like driving through life

with your hand-break on.~~-- Maxwell Maltz

 

It's not me who can't keep a secret it's the people I tell that to. "

---Abe Lincoln

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Frustration~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Chris asks his dad to explain the difference between

 

Irritation, Aggravation, and Frustration.

 

His father picks up the phone and dials a random number.

 

When the phone is answered, he asks, " May I speak to Duane, please? "

 

" There's no Duane here, " the person who answered the phone says.

 

His father hangs up. " That, son, is irritation, " he says.

 

He picks up the phone again, dials the same number and

asks for Duane a second time.

 

" I told you, there's no Duane here! " shouted the person who answered

the phone. " If you call here again, I will report you to the police! "

 

His father hangs up and says, " That, son, is aggravation. "

 

" Then what's frustration, Dad, " Chris asks.

 

His father picks up the phone and dials the same number a third time.

" Hi, this is Duane. Have there been any calls for me? "

he asks casually.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

A man entered a stationery store and asked the clerk for a

birthday/anniversary card.

 

The clerk replied, " We have birthday cards and we have anniversary cards.

Why not take one of each? "

 

The man said, " You don't understand. I need a card that covers *both*

events! You see, we're celebrating the fifth anniversary of my wife's

thirty-fourth birthday... "

 

: )