Attractions of wondrous gurus

[Guest guest]

Greetings,

This email is addressed only to the subject at hand not to any one in

particular. Please do not take offense whatever your views. I wish to

offer my opinion regarding gurus and saints. I am an American seeker

and my journey and discovery of Vedanta was initially driven by a

distrust of piety and the myths found in all religions. I had had a

lot of experience with such in Christianity. Reading Vivekananda was a

liberation to me. From reading him over many years, I think he would be

the first to discourage his followers from various forms of piety and

worship of gurus which for some is so appealing while for others so

alienating. I have met some devotees who have an absolute childlike

innocence, devoid of all guile I am sure, yet to my experience they

seem gullible and wrapped up in the supernatural trapping and wonders

of religion. That has never been my experience and I have had to plod

along with the temperament I have. I have seen first hand the excesses

of sentimental and social religion so I follow a stoney path of doubt

and vigilance. In some odd sense that is difficult to explain, religion

has been in some way, a stubborn obstacle to my free experience of

spirituality. For some of us, we have to first cast off our disgust at

a false start to embrace the path again.

 

I think I have had the good fortune in my life to sit at the feet of

two teachers who were great sadhus- who from all observations over many

years-- appeared to have attained high levels of spiritual experience.

Since there are no doubt enlightened ones who live completely in

secret, I suppose I have met several others. In any case, other than

inspiration and guidance, the path is always one's own. Painfully so--

love them though you may. The teachers I knew were in fact very stern

and absolutely did not allow much personal interaction. Detachment and

impersonality is an absolute pit of quick sand for some who grew up

with detached or non-focused parents. We hunger for warmth and love and

real personal connection at last.

 

The teachers I met seemed to know what one's intentions and needs were.

Sometimes to some they were warm and informal while to others they were

grave and detached. One teacher would even shout and scold someone who

would try to worship him and grovel-- kissing his feet. I mean shout,

" Do not do that! " He was usually very detached and a hard task master.

I have lived in a Catholic monastery and, in spite of all outward

appearances, it was one of the most spiritually difficult places in the

world to be. A very lonely place and emotionally difficult place to be

at the time.

 

In the Gospel of Ramakrishna I especially love his warmth and

informality at times. How he would dance and even wrestle with his

disciples. Can you imagine? How I wish I had lived then, but of course,

even those who were there, were often blind to their privilege as they

later realized. Didn't someone write, " If you are a pickpocket and

Jesus walks into the room, you will see only his pockets " ? My initial

ideal was to be with a Mother Teresa or St. Francis as a pampered and

loved child. That has never been my experience in Vedanta. In fact, it

seems frowned upon and the goal is to " become a lamp [and a detached

one at that] unto oneself. "

 

My point, at least from my non-Indian, my midwestern American view, is

that worship and admiration of holy men can be a distraction. It turns

me off when I hear it. Maybe that stems from jealousy. Would that a

Jesus or a Krishna would gather us into their arms and give us samadhi

at a touch. In my experience of life, miracles are generally extremely

subtle. Spirituality, although greatly comforting, is always struggle,

conflict, one step after the other. Teachers at times the worst of our

obstacles, especially if we want to make crutches of them. They will

not usually allow a bit of that sweetness if it will harm us with

attachment. So I continue to be skeptical and turned off by any show of

piety or stories of wondrous sadhus or much that smacks of the

praeternatural. I say this not to criticize but to relate a different

experience if it relates in any way helpful to any others with such

difficulty. Right now the world is mourning the death of Pope John

Paul. If you listen, you can hear and feel the hunger we all have to

make a holy man into a god-man as if that is somehow proof and

satisfaction and surety regarding the Divine Creator. Neti, Neti, Neti!

Walk on alone Lord Buddha would say. Who was it used the analogy of

religion as a boat to carry us across the rushing river to the far

shore. Once across we are to leave the boat. Only a fool would carry it

upon their shoulders and walk on land. Some teaches say religion is all

just practice until we reach realization. In that sense, it is total

non-sense later. It is a boat, only a craft, not yet the goal I think

that means. I would add you have to paddle, paddle, paddle. Wishing

will not get you anywhere.

 

What I have witnessed in the presence of these real sadhus is that when

you sincerely ask them a question without a psychological game going

on, they will not only answer the question, but the real question one

has that is still below consciousness. That is an uncanny experience

and one feels it when it happens. That is a kind of secret hidden

miracle that one can truly experience. In that way, I have experienced

that something beyond my kin is happening. Teachers will use examples

that not even they know the significance of, but will pierce you to the

heart. It takes a bit a bravery to sit at the feet of a real holy man

or woman. In that, many are driven away. I certainly have been driven

away many times by the encounter. It is not always sweet is what I have

experienced. I have left the teacher cursing him over and over under my

breath for days. When I talk to a small child I can often know his mind

and needs before he does. It is like that. We are like self-revealing

children to them. Except of course we have our huge egos which seem so

right at all costs.

 

Anyway thoughts of a doubting Thomas . . .

Peace to you

Tomikin