4th of July

July 4, 2009

4July 1902 was a memorable day. Swami Vivekananda, a great prophet of modern India , passed away at about 9:00 pm while he was in meditation. The flame of his life-lamp, which brightened the spiritual world, suddenly blew out in the deep darkness of night. The next morning this sad news spread throughout Calcutta and all over India . Swamiji's disciple Kanai Maharaj (Swami Nirbhayananda) came to our house in Ahiritola and gave us the news. I was then busy performing worship in a temple nearby. I returned home before 9:00 am to find my mother crying loudly. When I asked why she was grieving, she said, �My son, a great calamity has taken place. Swamiji is no more. He has passed away - and you never did take me to see him. I replied, �Mother, all monks in the monastery are called Swami. Which swamiji are you talking about? Perhaps you have misunderstood something. My mother answered: �Oh no, Kanai came early this morning and said that the head Swamiji passed away last night at nine o'clock. He asked all of you to go to Belur Math. I consoled my mother, saying, �It is not good to express grief for the death of a monk.

Swamiji in Mahasamadhi

At that time my friend Nibaran, a disciple of Holy Mother, arrived. I decided not to go to work. Accompanied by Nibaran and my younger brother Dulalshashi, I went to the Ahiritola ghat, crossed the Ganges by boat, and then reached Belur Math at 10:00 am via Salikha (Salkia) and Ghusuri. It was raining a little. I saw that Rakhal Maharaj (Swami Brahmananda) and some monks were busy decorating a cot with flowers in the western veranda of the Math building. When Rakhal Maharaj saw me, he burst into tears. His voice was choked, so he pointed to the steps and indicated that we should go upstairs.

When I entered Swami Vivekananda's room I saw that his divine body had been laid on a carpet. His forehead was smeared with holy ashes; a bouquet of flowers was placed near his head; and his body was covered with a new ochre cloth. His right hand was resting on the floor and a rosary had been placed around his right thumb. His eyes were indrawn and half-closed like Lord Shiva in meditation. The entire room was full of fragrance from incense burning at both sides of his body. Sister Nivedita was seated at the left side of Swamiji's body, steadily fanning his head with a palm-leaf fan. Tears were trickling down her cheeks. Swamiji's head was placed to the west and his feet to the east, towards the Ganges . Grief-stricken, Brahmachari Nandalal sat silently at his feet. We all three bowed down to Swamiji, touching his feet, and then sat there. When I touched his feet, they were as cold as ice.

I then touched Swamiji's rosary and repeated the mantra given by my guru. Meanwhile, many distinguished people and devotees from Calcutta and other places arrived to see Swamiji for the last time. One after another they bowed down to him and left; but the three in my party, Brahmachari Nandalal and Sister Nivedita stayed. When I finished my japa, Nivedita whispered to me: �Can you sing, my friend? Would you mind singing the songs that our Thakur used to sing? I said that I could not sing. Nivedita then requested, �On my behalf will you please ask your friend to sing?

Then my friend Nibaran sang a few songs melodiously: �Cherish my precious Mother Shyama tenderly within, O mind; Why should I go to Ganga or Gaya , to Kashi, Kanchi or Prabhas?; �Is Kali, my Mother, really black? The Naked One, of blackest hue, lights the lotus of the heart; �The black bee of my mind is drawn in sheer delight to the blue lotus flower of Mother Shyama's feet; �O my mind, chant the name of Kali. If you say Kali, Kali, the fear of Kala [Death] will disappear.

Nivedita's Reaction

Nivedita listened to these songs with all her attention. Pent-up emotions overflowed from her heart and began to flow from her eyes as tears. It was an unforgettable and sad scene; I shall never forget it. Although the incident occurred forty-five years ago, still its memory is written on my mind in golden letters. On that day the expression on Nivedita's face told me how wounded was her lost and sad heart! It truly stirred my consciousness. I realized that her reaction was not the result of mere emotional weakness.