HELLO!

[Guest guest]

First of all I would like to thank everyone who has given me feedback on the

posts I have sent in. Sorry I haven't written to all of you before now but

I've been withdrawing for the past few days. Right now is not a good time for

me. It has been a year ago yesterday (Oct. 4th) that my niece and godchild

committed suicide. She left 3 little girls ages 5, 3 and 6 months. Also a

friend of mine for 38 years died of cancer 6 months ago. I miss them both so

much.

 

Things I've said in my posts have only been a tip of the iceberg in my life.

I too Florie have gone through drugs and alcoholism. I have been clean for 25

years. Yes, I try to be strong but sometimes it catch's up with me especially

at this time. I am here listening to everyone and hoping for peace. I also

experience panic attacks. I'm on medication for them also anti depressants. I

see a therapist once a month too. My past always seems to be right there to

haunt me.

 

Caroline, with what you said to me I would swear you know me personally. The

guilt is always there. I can't seem to let it go. I was told all my life by

my Mother that it was all my fault for everything. I was raised in such a

dysfunctional family. I grew up feeling that it was all my doing.

 

Well, there I go again. Thank you all for listening to me. Sometime it helps

to talk about it.

 

Thanks,

My love to all of you,

Ellie