Helping Others

[Guest guest]

Each of us has our own way of showing love, concern and

understanding. We also have our own way of reaching out and

helping. It's difficult to stand by and watch others suffer. Before

we step in, our help should be wanted.

On the other side of the issue is the one needing help. Sometimes

they're unable to accept what we have to offer. Everyone has their

own idea how to help, and what kind of help they want. It isn't

always easy to be able to give someone the assistance they'll be

receptive to. We give in the only way we know how, which isn't often

understood or appreciated. Often people think what they feel to be

helpful is not, and many times what they may need, isn't percieved as

being helpful at all. Let me give an example: A lonely woman may

just need to have someone to talk to and be held, though her well

meaning friend may think she needs therapy, and yet another thinks

she needs something else. Many don't understand or listen to those

they wish to help, and sometimes those needing something aren't sure

how to get it or even what exactly it is. Would having someone to

complain to help an ailing woman, or would finding something to take

her mind off her troubles be more benificial?

This isn't aimed at anyone in particular, just a few thoughts and

feelings gathering around in my mind as I read the various posts here.

As caring individuals we must be careful how much we reach out and

get involved. I had to face this lesson quite a few times before

realizing I was reaching out too far. Being empathic makes it

difficult for me not to get emotionally involved, and I must learn

how to tone down the signals I recieve from others. I believe we're

all empathic, among other abilities we're born with, though we're

often not aware of them.

Sometimes the best and most difficult thing we can do is let

someone handle things themselves in their own way, so they'll really

learn whatever lesson is in store for them. No one can really teach

anyone, but gently guide tham, or remind them. This is how I feel,

though I don't expect everyone to agree, that's ok. It's just

something to think about.

One thing I realized from being on both sides of this is, we don't

always know what's best for others, even if we think we do, though

frequently there are those who aren't aware of what they really need,

or what's best for them. As with anything in life, there's no one

size fits all, despite what manufacturers think.

(gentle smile)

 

Sincerely, in Friendship, Silver