Cleaning the Mind

[Guest guest]

Cleaning the Mind

by Karen Bentley

 

The biggest problem with a mistake that's not forgiven is that it becomes a

piece of garbage cluttering up your mind. The longer you dwell on the mistake,

the more it magnifies and distracts you. Soon, all you think about is this

horrible mistake and how much it's impacted your life. Since we rarely, if ever,

throw out our mistakes, our minds become a giant toxic dumpsite for all these

things that we've done or had done to us. It results in perpetual unhappiness.

 

Imagine what your house would be like if you never cleaned it or if you never

threw anything out. There would be dust and dirt everywhere. Huge piles of junk

mail, newspapers, and catalogs. Add heaps of old clothes, decaying foods, broken

appliances, worn-out furniture, and pretty soon you have a real mess going. All

of this trash and ugliness would be contained in your house for you to look at

and live with and remember. Day in and day out, you would be reminded of every

little piece of trash you ever brought into your house.

 

This is what it's like to keep your past mistakes [or other people's past

mistakes]. It's like walking through garbage, standing in garbage, sleeping in

garbage, eating next to garbage, and pretending with all your might that the

garbage doesn't matter. It's impossible to be happy when you're living in a

dump. The solution is to stop living in such a toxic environment and clean up

the dump! This is what forgiveness does for you. It cleans your mind and gets

you out of your past.

 

Spiritual forgiveness is not a painful process. A mind that is free of darkness

experiences the joy of light. When you forgive yourself or another, you open the

door to this joy.

 

Forgiveness is fast

Spiritual forgiveness is very fast, and the social practice of forgiveness is

slow. Many people believe forgiveness takes an extended period of time, perhaps

even a lifetime. People waste years, literally year after year, trying to

justify their anger. Trying to vent their anger. Trying to understand someone

else's anger. Complaining about how hard or unfair life is. Or about how much

they've been mistreated. Maybe they're living with great anxiety and guilt about

something they said or did in the past. These rehashing practices are supposed

to get rid of the anger and bring about happiness. But think about this for a

moment. If you get what you focus on, is it possible to be happy when you

continually focus on hate? No. Not now. Not ever! It is not possible in any way

because the presence of anger and guilt blocks happiness. Therefore all the

excruciating time spent on activities like the ones listed above is a colossal

waste and results in nothing except more unhappiness.

 

The only way to be happy is to get rid of anger and guilt. This happens in an

instant. It happens the moment you express your willingness to get rid of the

hate that's in your mind. The notion that forgiveness takes a long time is a

lie.

 

Forgiveness is not hard

The social practice of forgiveness can be cumbersome and difficult, involving

multiple stages and/or steps. First, you get ready to forgive. Then you do this.

Then you do that. Then the person you want to forgive has to do something. Maybe

you need professional help or expert intervention. And on and on.

 

It's useful to remember that God does not take steps because his accomplishments

cannot be partial or gradual. Therefore the spiritual practice of forgiveness is

in God's likeness. It's extremely easy, extremely powerful, and it only involves

one step: a change of mind about badness or wrongness. This one simple step

results in an immediate effect.

 

Forgiveness is private

The social practice of forgiveness is public in the sense that it always

involves a dialogue between two or more people, usually face-to-face. Spiritual

forgiveness is not publicly expressed and physical presence is not important.

The person to be forgiven can be alive or dead, close or far away.

 

Forgiveness is an ongoing practice

The social practice of forgiveness is typically done just once and then it's

over with. Spiritual forgiveness is an ongoing effort, continually repeated over

and over, to keep the mind free of hate.

 

A friend of mine was going through a painful divorce, and she decided to

participate in a support group as a form of self-help. She noticed that a man in

the group was hung up about a cheating spouse and constantly complained bitterly

about her. " I tried to forgive her, " he said. " I tried for a whole week. But it

was no use, I can't forgive her. I hate what she did. I hate the way she did it.

And I hate the way she screwed up my life! " My friend said that the other people

in the group sympathized with the speaker's feelings.

 

It's not generally understood that forgiveness is something you do for yourself

every day, like brushing your teeth. Plaque has to be removed from your teeth on

a daily basis, just like hate has to be removed from your mind on a daily basis.

It's helpful to think of forgiveness as a spiritual fitness program instead of a

one-time event. No one starting a physical fitness program expects to be

conditioned and fit in a week. Likewise, no one expects to build a big beautiful

muscle the very first time a weight is lifted at the gym. If, for example,

you're trying to build strong and large biceps, then you have to do hundreds of

bicep exercises over several consecutive weeks to get a result. The same

principle of repetition is necessary to become spiritually strong. Strength

doesn't appear the first time you offer forgiveness. It comes as the result of

regular and disciplined practice.

 

Forgiveness strengthens your connection to God

When your thoughts are neutralized of condemnation, they are in alignment with

God. That's because God, being love and only love, does not condemn. God does

not hold your unloving thoughts, words, or acts against you. God does not even

see them. In heaven, there is no such thing as a mistake. Therefore, a mistake

is not real. It's something made by the ego self and can be completely undone

and overlooked. This is why it's always appropriate to release unloving thoughts

you hold against yourself or others. The spiritual practice of forgiveness is a

refusal to focus on mistakes and the willingness to develop spiritual vision,

which sees only goodness.

 

In addition, the act of spiritual forgiveness invites your Higher Self into your

conscious awareness. It's a way to tangibly demonstrate and remember yourself as

a loving, worthy being. You are the one, after all, who most needs to remember

yourself in this way.

 

Forgiveness is also a step towards enlightenment because each time you override

the impulse to hate, you are temporarily disengaging the ego. When you

repeatedly disengage the ego, over and over, in a consistent and disciplined

way, you develop a kind of momentum. This momentum then works in your favor

because you develop a predisposition or a habit to override the ego. This

predisposition makes it easier and easier to stay focused on your Higher Christ

self. The same thing happens, but in an inverse way, with so-called bad habits.

When you continually overeat or drink too much, the predisposition to indulge

takes over and becomes very strong. In both cases, you are dealing with the

strength of momentum. It's just that in one case, the momentum works for you,

and in the other, it works against you.

 

EXERCISE IN LOVE

The time is now to forgive, my friend. No more procrastination. No more delay.

No more deliberation about whether it's appropriate for you. No more wondering

whether it will work. Forgiveness is always justified. It's always appropriate.

It always works. Take the next 10 or 15 minutes of your life to rediscover your

own, true, loving, Christ self nature. That's all it takes to see yourself and

another through the eyes of kindness.

 

Preparation

Decide, now, who you want to forgive. It should be someone other than yourself,

as you will forgive yourself as part of the exercise. This other person can be

living or deceased. It can be someone from far back in your past or from a

current relationship. It can be someone you know casually or someone you know

very well. Anyone who comes to the forefront of your mind is a good choice for

this exercise. As part of the exercise, you'll be asked to identify all the

things that bother you about this person. Don't leave anything out. Recognizing

each and every one of your attack thoughts, no matter how small or seemingly

insignificant, is a way of neutralizing them. So be completely honest with

yourself. This will enable you to get the maximum effect.

 

Whenever you're ready, find a quiet, private place where you won't be observed

or interrupted. If possible, sit in a chair or on the floor, rather than

standing up or laying down. Once you've found a spot and identified the person

to be forgiven, become as relaxed and comfortable as possible. First, give

yourself a minute or two to quiet your mind. If you're familiar with meditating,

then meditate until you feel at peace. If you don't meditate, then just shut

your eyes and breathe in a relaxed way. Once your mind is quiet, relax your body

while keeping your eyes closed. If you notice any areas of tightness, briefly

tighten them even more, and then let go of the tension. When you feel ready to

begin the forgiveness exercise, open your eyes enough to be able to continue to

read, but at the same time maintain your peaceful state.

 

The exercise

This exercise starts with the forgiveness of another, and it ends with the

forgiveness of yourself. By letting go of the judgments you hold against

another, you're then able to let go of the judgments you hold against yourself.

 

1. Think of the person you want to forgive. Become aware of the hate in your

mind that you hold towards this person. Recognize the hate and accept it without

judgment. Don't make yourself wrong or bad for being hateful. So what if you

have hate in your mind? We all do or we wouldn't be here. What matters is

whether or not you choose to keep it once you become aware of it.

 

2. Start thinking about what this person said or did in the past that is

bothering you. Maybe it's a long list of little things. Maybe it's one big

thing. Maybe it's petty. Maybe it's selfish. Maybe it's silly. It doesn't

matter. Bring whatever is bothering you out into the light. Write it down if you

like. Then use the following phrase to neutralize each bothersome thing you

identify:

 

My attack thoughts about ___________ [person's name]

and _______________________________ [the disturbance that is bothering me]

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

Examples:

 

My attack thoughts about Jim

and the hateful, demeaning things that he says to me

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

My attack thoughts about Jim

because of the way he lies and tries to cheat me out of money

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

And so on.

 

3. When you're done, you now realize that you fully want to forgive this person,

and so you say these words in your mind:

 

In the holiness of God's light, I forgive ___________ [person's name].

 

4. Now think about all the things that are bothering you about yourself. Again,

it doesn't matter what the bothersome thing is. It could be from the past or

present. Just bring it into your conscious awareness. Use the following phrase

to neutralize each bothersome thing you identify:

 

My attack thoughts about myself

because __________________________ [the disturbance that is bothering me]

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

Examples:

 

My attack thoughts about myself

because my carelessness caused an accident

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

My attack thoughts about myself

because I said mean things about Janice

are dissolved in the light of forgiveness.

 

And so on.

 

5. When you're done, you'll realize that you fully want to forgive yourself. So

you say these words in your mind:

 

In the holiness of God's light, I forgive myself.

 

LOVING MEDITATION

Say this prayer several times until it fully registers in your mind:

 

Forgiveness offers everything I want.

Today I have accepted this as true.

Today I have received the gifts of God.

 

This article was excerpted from The Book of Love, ©2002, by Karen Bentley.

 

Reprinted with permission of the publisher, Big Heart Books.

http://www.big-heart.com

 

 

 

 

--

 

About the Author

 

Karen Bentley is Big Heart. A highly gifted author and in-demand speaker, she is

the nationally acclaimed creator of the Awaken Your Passion book and seminar

series. Her goal is to revolutionize the way people think about love, to show

how spiritual love is the source of all happiness and peace. Formerly, Karen

served as the director for The Center for Forgiveness and the editor of The

Spirit's Voice, a magazine for spiritual seekers.

 

·.»§« ·´¯`·.,¸¸,.·´¯`·.»§« please include ss tag thank you·.»§«

·´¯`·.,¸¸,.·´¯`·.»§«

 

© Spiritually_Speaking

spiritually_speaking- : )