Detachment from outcome

September 28, 2007

Hi all,

After doing a few weeks of IDD sessions on myself to help me get more control in my meditation sessions, I found that one of the tapping sequences that worked better than all the others was one that involved circumventing my care of/attachment to the outcome, or my perception of how important what I'm working on is. The control I got when I didn't care as much was allot better than anything I had managed before, however, I know I did not resolve all the aspects of this issue of caring too much, because about 45 minutes later my performance was back to how it was before.

So my questions is; does anyone know what is the construction of this complex (i.e. caring in a counter-productive way about outcome)? How can it be broken down into easily tappable "bite size" chunks, so that one can address all the aspects of this issue?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Adriaan

September 28, 2007

I don't understand the idea of detachment from outcome.

If I don't have a desire and an expectency, I don't do stuff.

Even to get up to get diet Pepsi out of the fridge, I have to have a sensation that is "missing" that I want, then when I start drinking it, I like the sensation / taste of it so much I keep drinking it.

When I program, I have some outcome I want. I program with my emotion and my expectation of success, then I go take action. Sometimes I have to do anchors and future pacing to actually take action on what answers I got (i.e., if the answer says "spend 45 minutes a day on the treadmill, and I want the outcome but don't want to get on the treadmill).And when people say they detach from their desire for the outcome when they end their programming, I wonder how that works for them when it does? Is it because if they're not thinking about outcome X, they're ALSO not thinking about their own negative tag ends and reversals are not activated?

I know that everything I've ever done WELL and been real good at it, I've had a burning desire, or even an obsession / compulsion to do that well.

Same with Remote Viewing.

When I work a Remote Viewing health case just for the heck of it, my success is not nearly as good as when I do a health case because I have the DESIRE to do it and some emotional attachment to the successful outcome.

Now if you mean detaching from the ego of "Waht if I screw up" or "What will others think about it?" then that makes sense to me. Maybe that's what you mean when you say detaching from the outcome?

I'm not sure what you mean?

Jim

young_rver Sep 28, 2007 12:08 AM Detachment from outcome

Hi all,

After doing a few weeks of IDD sessions on myself to help me get more control in my meditation sessions, I found that one of the tapping sequences that worked better than all the others was one that involved circumventing my care of/attachment to the outcome, or my perception of how important what I'm working on is. The control I got when I didn't care as much was allot better than anything I had managed before, however, I know I did not resolve all the aspects of this issue of caring too much, because about 45 minutes later my performance was back to how it was before.

So my questions is; does anyone know what is the construction of this complex (i.e. caring in a counter-productive way about outcome)? How can it be broken down into easily tappable "bite size" chunks, so that one can address all the aspects of this issue?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Adriaan

October 2, 2007

The problem isn’t so much “caring too much” as it is “fear of failure.” If you’re unsure of your abilities or afraid of screwing something up, then that’s what causes you to “care” whether it’s working or not. That KIND of caring about the outcome comes from a place of lack and fear and attracts more of that.

Imagine, for example, that your friend is dying and you have the MIRACLE CURE in your pocket. You KNOW that this cure is going to work and it’s going to save your friend. Now, as you’re driving over to the hospital, how do you feel? How much do you care about the outcome?

Now imagine a second scenario where your friend is still dying and you have the miracle cure...but you’re not so sure that it’s going to work. You’ve heard it works, but you have some doubts. Well you’re going to go over there anyway and try to help your friend, but all of his family will be there. And all of your mutual friends. What if you go there and the cure doesn’t work and you fail utterly and everyone thinks you’re an asshole for getting a dying friend’s hopes up?

Notice the difference in feeling with the 2 scenarios. Is the caring you feel about the outcome in the first one different from the caring about the outcome in the second one? If so, how?

-Mike

On 9/27/07 9:08 PM, " young_rver " <young_rver wrote:

Hi all,

After doing a few weeks of IDD sessions on myself to help me get more control in my meditation sessions, I found that one of the tapping sequences that worked better than all the others was one that involved circumventing my care of/attachment to the outcome, or my perception of how important what I'm working on is. The control I got when I didn't care as much was allot better than anything I had managed before, however, I know I did not resolve all the aspects of this issue of caring too much, because about 45 minutes later my performance was back to how it was before.

So my questions is; does anyone know what is the construction of this complex (i.e. caring in a counter-productive way about outcome)? How can it be broken down into easily tappable " bite size " chunks, so that one can address all the aspects of this issue?

Any help would be greatly appreciated!

Adriaan

October 3, 2007

I agree with you that there are two different types of "care" here, the first one you mention being the healthy one, for images of failure don't come to mind. The second being the unhealthy one, for it creates a fear of failure and therefore images of things going wrong. So I'm interested in eliminating the unhealthy care that screws things up whilst keeping the healthy care that makes us get off our butts and do something about our goals.

I noticed that many people as well as myself tend to get the unhealthy type of care when judging stakes to be very high.

For example, to illustrate this point, lets take a football kicker, it's the superbowl, end of the fourth quarter, and it's his job to kick the field goal that will win his team the superbowl (the stakes are high). In this moment, he will have a greater propensity to get nervous and mess up a perfectly easy field goal. A field goal that he nails everytime during practice.

Howcome, even though he is doing the exact same action (fieldgoal kicking), does this football player get the unhealthy care when the super bowl?

I think doc is right about this being about self doubt. That it is subconscious self doubt that creates this "unhealthy care". It also seems to me that this kind of doubt seems to be almost generic ,as if everyone has it, some allot more than others and some allot less.

So I'm interested in knowing what tend to be, in general, the various components of these kinds of doubts? This would help me in IDD sessions to better identify and take appart the various aspects which comprise this issue I have of self doubt.

Adriaan

P.S. Thanks for all the replies btw!

, mysterxe <mysterxe wrote:>> The problem isn¹t so much ³caring too much² as it is ³fear of failure.² If> you¹re unsure of your abilities or afraid of screwing something up, then> that¹s what causes you to ³care² whether it¹s working or not. That KIND of> caring about the outcome comes from a place of lack and fear and attracts> more of that.> > Imagine, for example, that your friend is dying and you have the MIRACLE> CURE in your pocket. You KNOW that this cure is going to work and it¹s> going to save your friend. Now, as you¹re driving over to the hospital, how> do you feel? How much do you care about the outcome?> > Now imagine a second scenario where your friend is still dying and you have> the miracle cure...but you¹re not so sure that it¹s going to work. You¹ve> heard it works, but you have some doubts. Well you¹re going to go over> there anyway and try to help your friend, but all of his family will be> there. And all of your mutual friends. What if you go there and the cure> doesn¹t work and you fail utterly and everyone thinks you¹re an asshole for> getting a dying friend¹s hopes up?> > Notice the difference in feeling with the 2 scenarios. Is the caring you> feel about the outcome in the first one different from the caring about the> outcome in the second one? If so, how?> > > -Mike> > > > On 9/27/07 9:08 PM, "young_rver" young_rver wrote:> > > > > > Hi all,> > After doing a few weeks of IDD sessions on myself to help me get more control> > in my meditation sessions, I found that one of the tapping sequences that> > worked better than all the others was one that involved circumventing my care> > of/attachment to the outcome, or my perception of how important what I'm> > working on is. The control I got when I didn't care as much was allot better> > than anything I had managed before, however, I know I did not resolve all the> > aspects of this issue of caring too much, because about 45 minutes later my> > performance was back to how it was before.> > So my questions is; does anyone know what is the construction of this complex> > (i.e. caring in a counter-productive way about outcome)? How can it be broken> > down into easily tappable "bite size" chunks, so that one can address all the> > aspects of this issue?> > Any help would be greatly appreciated!> > Adriaan> >>