Humor: What .. No E-Mail Address?

[Guest guest]

LOL!

I knew a variation on this where the verger

of a church got turfed out because he was

illiterate.

Ien in the Kootenays

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" What is the use of a house if you haven't

got a tolerable planet to put it on? "

~Thoreau

Saving the rainforest, a cup of tea at the time.

http://wildhealing.net

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[Guest guest]

An unemployed man is desperate to support his wife and three kids. He

applies for a janitor's job at a large tech firm and easily passes an

aptitude test.

 

The human resources manager tells him, " You will be hired at minimum

wage of $5.35 an hour. Let me have your e-mail address so that we can

get you in the loop. Our system will automatically e-mail you all the

forms and advise you when to start and where to report on your first day. "

 

Taken back, the man protests that he is poor and has neither a computer

nor an e-mail address. To this the manager replies, " You must understand

that to a company like ours that means that you virtually do not exist.

Without an e-mail address you can hardly expect to be employed by a

high-tech firm. "

 

" Good day. "

 

Stunned, the man leaves. Not knowing where to turn and having $10 in

his wallet, he walks past a farmers' market and sees a stand selling 25

lb. crates of beautiful red tomatoes. He buys a crate, carries it to a

busy corner and displays the tomatoes. In less than 2 hours he sells all

the tomatoes and makes 100% profit.

 

Repeating the process several times more that day, he ends up with

almost $100 and arrives home that night with several bags of groceries

for his family.

 

During the night he decides to repeat the tomato business the next day.

By the end of the week he is getting up early every day and working into

the night. He multiplies his profits quickly. Early in the second week

he acquires a cart to transport several boxes of tomatoes at a time, but

before a month is up he sells the cart to buy a broken-down pickup truck.

 

At the end of a year he owns three old trucks. His two sons have left

their neighborhood gangs to help him with the tomato business, his wife

is buying the tomatoes, and his daughter is taking night courses at the

community college so she can keep books for him.

 

By the end of the second year he has a dozen very nice used trucks and

employs fifteen previously unemployed people, all selling tomatoes. He

continues to work hard.

 

Time passes and at the end of the fifth year he owns a fleet of nice

trucks and a warehouse that his wife supervises, plus two tomato farms

that the boys manage.

 

The tomato company's payroll has put hundreds of homeless and jobless

people to work. His daughter reports that the business grossed a million

dollars.

 

Planning for the future, he decides to buy some life insurance.

 

Consulting with an insurance adviser, he picks an insurance plan to fit

his new circumstances.

 

Then the adviser asks him for his e-mail address in order to send the

final documents electronically.

 

When the man replies that he doesn't have time to mess with a computer

and has no e-mail address, the insurance man is stunned, " What, you

don't have e-mail? No computer? No Internet? Just think where you

would be today if you'd had all of that five years ago! "

 

" Ha! " snorts the man. " If I'd had e-mail five years ago I would be

sweeping floors at Microsoft and making $5.35 an hour. "

 

Which brings us to the moral of the story: Since you got this story by

e-mail, you're probably closer to being a janitor than a millionaire.

 

Sadly, I received it also. ;-)

[Guest guest]

ROFLMAO! Sad but true! LOL!

 

Cheers!

Kathleen Petrides

The Woobey Queen

The Warming Touch, Therapeutic Pillows

http://www.woobeyworld.com

 

 

> Which brings us to the moral of the story: Since you got this story by

> e-mail, you're probably closer to being a janitor than a millionaire.

>

> Sadly, I received it also. ;-)