O/T this was too cute NOT to pass on... Happy Victoria day to my fellow Canucks!

[Guest guest]

The Way Children See Things!

 

 

 

 

 

NUDITY

 

 

 

I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when

 

a Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark

 

naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from

 

the back seat, " Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

HONESTY

 

 

 

My son Zachary, 4, came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd

 

dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. So I fished it out and threw it in

 

the garbage. Zachary stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my

 

bathroom and came out with my toothbrush. He held it up and said with a

 

charming little smile, " We better throw this one out too then, 'cause

 

it fell in the toilet a few days ago.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

OPINIONS

 

 

 

On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a Note from

 

his mother. The note read, " The opinions expressed by this child are not

 

necessarily those of his parents "

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

KETCHUP

 

 

 

A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the jar.

 

During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old

 

daughter to answer the phone. " It's the minister, Mommy, " the child said

 

to her mother. Then she added, " Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to

 

you right now. She's hitting the bottle. "

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

MORE NUDITY

 

 

 

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker

 

room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies

 

grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in

 

amazement and then asked, " What's the matter haven't you ever seen a

 

little boy before? "

 

 

 

 

 

ELDERLY

 

 

 

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly

 

shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.

 

The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and

 

wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a

 

pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the

 

inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, " The

 

tooth fairy will never believe this! "

 

 

 

 

 

DRESS-UP

 

 

 

A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her

 

dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, " Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit. "

 

" And why not, darling? " " You know that it always gives you a headache the

 

next morning. "

 

 

 

 

 

SCHOOL

 

 

 

A little girl had just finished her first week of school. " I'm just wasting

my time, " she said to her mother. " I can't read, I can't write and they

 

won't let me talk! "

 

 

 

 

 

BIBLE

 

 

 

A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he

 

fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the

 

Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old

 

leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. " Mama, look what I

 

found " , the boy called out.

 

" What have you got there, dear? " With astonishment in the young boy's

 

voice, he answered, " I think it's Adam's underwear. "

 

 

 

 

 

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