OT - Being Old

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Being Old

 

 

 

 

The other day a young person asked me how I

felt

about being old. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as

old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed, but I

explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder

it,

and let her know.

> Old Age, I decided, is a gift.

> I am now, probably for the first

time

in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my

body! I

sometime despair over my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the

sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that

lives

in my mirror (who looks like my mother!), but I don't agonize over

those things for long.

> I would never trade my amazing

friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a

flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and

less

critical of myself. I've become my own friend.

> I don't chide myself for eating

that

extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly

cement

gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I

am

entitled to a treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.

> I have seen too many dear friends

leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom

that comes with aging.

> Whose business is it if I choose

to

read or play on the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?

> I will dance with myself to those

wonderful tunes of the 40 & 50's, and if I, at the same time, wish to

weep over a lost love ... I will.

>

> I will walk the beach in a swim

suit

that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves

with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the

jet

set.

 

> They, too, will get old.

> I know I am sometimes forgetful.

But

there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And I

eventually

remember the important things.

> Sure, over the years my heart has

been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved

one,

or when a child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets

hit

by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and

understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and

sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

>

> I am so blessed to have lived long

enough to have my hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs

be

forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never

laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn

silver.

> As you get older, it is easier to

be

positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't

question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.

> So, to answer your question, I

like

being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I

am

not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not

waste

time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will

be.

And I shall eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it)

 

 

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