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Hi Debbie and list,

 

My suggestion is to call the parents of the teasing children your

child especially likes (or would like to like!) and talk to them

*very* gently, calmly and nicely, about your son's hurt feelings. It

would help if you know the parents somewhat and know that they are

reasonable people. If you can get at least some of the teasing to

stop, then the others may get tired of it sooner. Ideally you could

possibly find a parent/child who would stick up for your son.

 

I don't think you can count on the children alone in stopping this

problem. Parents shouold be involved. Teasing is bad, bad, bad, and

as Irene said in her note, it's not just about being vegetarian, it's

about being " different " and must be stopped for *everyone's* good, not

just your child's.

 

Good luck to you, and please let us know how things go with your

situation...!

 

Warmly,

Emily

Boulder, Colorado

 

P.S. If it makes anyone feel better, this sort of teasing doesn't

happen everywhere. My older son is in 2nd grade (younger son in K)

and has never been teased about being vegetarian. Some kids do

comment on the fact that he brings the same thing to lunch every day

(he's a picky eater!) and one child did say he wouldn't be healthy as

a vegetarian (obviously untrue since he's the tallest and fittest in

the class!), but no out- & -out teasing.

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I think as a child I would be embarrased if I found out my mother called

other parents to tell them to stop teasing me.

 

How about inviting some of these 'friends' over for dinner and having a nice

kid-friendly vegetarian meal that makes them say, " hey, this isn't all bad. "

 

Erika

 

 

Emily Goodin [emilyg28]

Mon, December 04, 2000 8:40 PM

; clarki

Re: Teasing

 

 

Hi Debbie and list,

 

My suggestion is to call the parents of the teasing children your

child especially likes (or would like to like!) and talk to them

*very* gently, calmly and nicely, about your son's hurt feelings. It

would help if you know the parents somewhat and know that they are

reasonable people. If you can get at least some of the teasing to

stop, then the others may get tired of it sooner. Ideally you could

possibly find a parent/child who would stick up for your son.

 

I don't think you can count on the children alone in stopping this

problem. Parents shouold be involved. Teasing is bad, bad, bad, and

as Irene said in her note, it's not just about being vegetarian, it's

about being " different " and must be stopped for *everyone's* good, not

just your child's.

 

Good luck to you, and please let us know how things go with your

situation...!

 

Warmly,

Emily

Boulder, Colorado

 

P.S. If it makes anyone feel better, this sort of teasing doesn't

happen everywhere. My older son is in 2nd grade (younger son in K)

and has never been teased about being vegetarian. Some kids do

comment on the fact that he brings the same thing to lunch every day

(he's a picky eater!) and one child did say he wouldn't be healthy as

a vegetarian (obviously untrue since he's the tallest and fittest in

the class!), but no out- & -out teasing.

 

 

 

 

For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at

http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to

http://www.vrg.org/family.

 

 

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Hi Erika and Debbie and list,

 

Oh sorry, I made an assumption that Debbie would talk to her son

before calling anyone. (Based on my little scenario, first she would

need to find out from her son who he would want her to call....) I

always consult my son(s) before doing any kind of

parent-intervention/communication. So far if there has been a

problem, they have always wanted me to " do the talking " - they

wouldn't have brought up the situation unless they were seeking some

advice or assistance. But that's just our own family's experience,

YMMV of course. (Your Mileage May Vary).

 

Inviting one or more of the " friends " and the family over for dinner

is a *great* idea. It would be especially nice if the parents were

there, too, so you could see how they react if a teasing situation

occurred. If they didn't correct it, you would know that you might

not want to encourage a friendship with that kid/family! <g>

 

Warmly,

Emily

 

-

" Erik@feK/mo2 " <erika

 

Thursday, December 07, 2000 4:46 AM

RE: Teasing

 

 

| I think as a child I would be embarrased if I found out my mother

called

| other parents to tell them to stop teasing me.

|

| How about inviting some of these 'friends' over for dinner and

having a nice

| kid-friendly vegetarian meal that makes them say, " hey, this isn't

all bad. "

|

| Erika

 

|

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> How about inviting some of these 'friends' over for

> dinner and having a nice

> kid-friendly vegetarian meal that makes them say,

> " hey, this isn't all bad. "

>

 

I agree! I have done this more than once, but not due

to teasing. I have just invited kids over to eat, and

then they seem to just " pick up on " the fact that the

food is normal.

 

> P.S. If it makes anyone feel better, this sort of

> teasing doesn't

> happen everywhere. My older son is in 2nd grade

> (younger son in K)

> and has never been teased about being vegetarian.

 

I have to say my son has never been teased either, but

he only went to public school for kidnergarten and 2

months of second grade. Usually the kids he meets are

kind of curious. I have a handful of different recipes

that I have whipped out when kids are interested in

" what do you guys even EAT? " . Sometimes they are

sweets and stuff, but it does the trick!

>

>

 

 

 

 

Thousands of Stores. Millions of Products.

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> I agree! I have done this more than once, but not due

> to teasing. I have just invited kids over to eat, and

> then they seem to just " pick up on " the fact that the

> food is normal.

>

 

I'd be interested in finding out what you serve these kids that they

find " normal. " . We're a vegan family and our food (a lot of times)

looks/tastes " weird " to kids from other families. We don't have cow's milk

to put on their cereal for sleepovers. I make whole grain pancakes and

buy whole grain waffles. We don't eat cow's milk pizza or mac'n cheese.

While my kids have adapted wonderfully to the vegan diet, having eaten

it their whole lives, many times friends will come over and turn up their

noses to almost everything. The only thing I've found that works on all

kids is pasta with margarine! Some dinner!

 

Any vegan /extremely picky kid ideas out there?

 

Thanks, Tracy

 

P.S. My kids (kindergarten and 5th grade) go to public school in a very

conservative area and have many friends and have not been teased, at

least not to where it bothered them. My son (the older one) has been

teased good-naturedly and taken it in stride.

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