soy vs real/Digest Number 461

[Guest guest]

We take this a step further...we eat soy- or vegie- 'whatever' and others eat

animal- or 'cow/pig/chicken' whatever...I don't want them to forget that

what is 'real' to meat eaters means 'dead' to the animal!

~shahara in WI

 

<< We just call it " soy whatever " as opposed to " real whatever " . It's not

TECHNICALLY true -- some of it is gluten based, but she can understand that

we eat " soy meatballs " and her cousins eat " real meatballs " (for example) so

I'm happy.

>>

[Guest guest]

So far, we've managed to avoid her asking " what IS meat " . She doesn't have

a clue what dead means and I'd rather wait until she's old enough to

understand a little better before telling her. Also, for the last year and

a half we've been living with my inlaws, which makes it a little touchier,

since they're not vegetarian. I really didn't want to step on toes. But I

know she'll ask sooner or later.

 

Sandra

 

> We take this a step further...we eat soy- or vegie- 'whatever' and others

eat

> animal- or 'cow/pig/chicken' whatever...I don't want them to forget that

> what is 'real' to meat eaters means 'dead' to the animal!

> ~shahara in WI

>

> << We just call it " soy whatever " as opposed to " real whatever " . It's not

> TECHNICALLY true -- some of it is gluten based, but she can understand

that

> we eat " soy meatballs " and her cousins eat " real meatballs " (for example)

so

> I'm happy.

> >>

For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at

http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to

http://www.vrg.org/family.

>

>

[Guest guest]

I spoke too soon. This weekend, we learned about death. Our cat died and

she's really really upset.

 

Sandra

 

 

> So far, we've managed to avoid her asking " what IS meat " . She doesn't

have

> a clue what dead means and I'd rather wait until she's old enough to

> understand a little better before telling her.

[Guest guest]

I'm sorry about your kitty. Our now 3 year old was too little to understand

when one of our cats died in 2000, but we have an elderly cat now and she'll

definitely understand when her time comes. I'm not looking forward to it.

 

Karen

-

Sandra Mort

Tuesday, August 13, 2002 9:49 AM

Re: soy vs real/Digest Number 461

 

 

I spoke too soon. This weekend, we learned about death. Our cat died and

she's really really upset.

 

Sandra

 

 

> So far, we've managed to avoid her asking " what IS meat " . She doesn't

have

> a clue what dead means and I'd rather wait until she's old enough to

> understand a little better before telling her.

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

, " Sandra Mort " <sandra.mort@o...> wrote:

> I spoke too soon. This weekend, we learned about death. Our cat

died and

> she's really really upset.

 

So sorry, Sandra! Did you have a funeral? We had to deal with the

death of a cherished goldfish last week. We buried it in the garden,

refrained from singing " El Maleh Rachamim " but Rafi (6 y/o) put

flowers on the grave and decorated a marker for it ... and he seems to

be doing OK now. Of course a goldfish is not terribly cuddly ...

 

Be well, Hadass in Winnipeg

[Guest guest]

Sorry to hear about you loss. It is hard to lose a

cat. My sympathies.

 

Ds has lost one cat, a grandmother, and now a he is

losing a great-grandfather in his short 30 mo. of

life.

 

Cocoa (a Siamese) died suddenly of a heart attack and

we found him dead (already stiff) in the morning. Ds

was very young then (under a year, but over 3 mo.),

but it was the first time we'd ever seen him upset.

I'm sure this was more a reaction to my sorrow and

stress than missing Cocoa. He does call all Siamese

cats Cocoa (even though we never mentioned Cocoa after

he died...it was too hard for me to talk about). Ds

knows lots of cats and we have a Maine Coon named

Tigger, but he still calls all Siamese cats Cocoa.

 

I think what helped with my mom (his grandmother) is

he saw her dying (we didn't keep him away from

anything). He was able to do what I felt comfortable

with (he would rub her back, give her water on a

sponge, kiss her, etc.). He wasn't with her when she

actually died, but he was in the room within an hour

and he seemed to know immediately that she was dead.

Even though she didn't look very different he

completely didn't act like she was there. Ds was

25mo. old at the time. I really think children

understand death in an entirely different way than we

adults understand it. I can't really explain his

reactions, but it was really amazing to watch. He

seemed to know exactly what to do and he wasn't scared

or shocked at all. I really think we are so far

removed from death in this culture that we tend to

fear it and make it a much more painful process than

it has to be. Just like childbirth is more painful

when the woman doesn't understand what is going on

with her body...I believe death is the same. I hope

ds gets to see many births in his life prior to his

own child being born and I hope the same for his

death. Only in being close to birth and death can we

peacefully go through them and aid others...it also

helps in our understanding of life.

 

We never sit down and talk about life and death with

ds, but he knows. He knows when a worm is dead

without me ever telling him. I never even sat down

and talked to him about my mom dying. He just knows

it from experiencing it with us. If he asks what meat

is then I would say a dead 'cow, pig, etc.'. So far I

don't think he's seen meat more than a handful of

times in his life. If he ever needs more of an

explanation then I'll give him one. I am big on not

over explaining things to ds (if I could just get that

way about posting to email lists you all wouldn't have

to read such a long post! LOL).

 

Interesting topic,

 

Linda

 

 

 

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