Guest guest Posted March 21, 2003 Report Share Posted March 21, 2003 So what do you tell him when he asks why does granny/daddy, etc. hurt animals? You didn't seem to like the teacher's response about choices, but you didn't say what you've told him. I really need to know. I posted this question last year and didn't get any responses. My son is 2 1/2 (3 in June) and knows he doesn't eat meat. He'll even ask me if something I'm serving him has meat in it (!). He's also asked if the cup I'm giving him is clean, so, who knows. But, I really, really need answers to " why does granny hurt animals " for an almost 3 year old. Death isn't on his radar screen yet. Lori ______________________ ______________________ Message: 3 Wed, 19 Mar 2003 11:15:04 -0500 C-Mendola <joplingv Explaining veg-issues to small children?? *****My son went through a phase where watching his relatives eat non-veg foods was upsetting to him. He would tell them 'you need to learn better', 'that's junky stuff', and question me as to 'how come Nana and Papa don't care about animals?' why don't they learn?' and 'Daddy Knows better! he doesn't listen!'.. My son's teacher has explained to him that everyone makes choices and decides what's right for them. She went on to say that it's okay that some people are vegetarians and others are not, blah blah... I have since had a conversation with her regarding this, and now she speaks with me first before discussing these types of things with my son. (It's fine and dandy that the world is full of all types of people, but what about the animals? How can my son understand how it's viewed as okay to hurt animals when I can't even understand it?! Yes, everyone can make their own choices, but why would Nana choose to eat what's left of a killed animal? Why would that be okay with her, and Papa, and Daddy, and his friends.. ?)******************* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2003 Report Share Posted March 24, 2003 Hi Lori - My daughter is 3.5 and well aware that we are vegetarian. When she has asked why people eat meat I've told her that most people don't like to think about what meat really is, so they ignore it. I've also told her that some people just don't care. They want to eat meat even if it means harming animals. She has not named grandma or grandpa specifically. I think I would say that grandma grew up eating meat and it is hard for her to stop now because she is so used to it. Karen - Lori Lugar ' ' Friday, March 21, 2003 1:31 PM Explaining veg-issues to small children?? So what do you tell him when he asks why does granny/daddy, etc. hurt animals? You didn't seem to like the teacher's response about choices, but you didn't say what you've told him. I really need to know. I posted this question last year and didn't get any responses. My son is 2 1/2 (3 in June) and knows he doesn't eat meat. He'll even ask me if something I'm serving him has meat in it (!). He's also asked if the cup I'm giving him is clean, so, who knows. But, I really, really need answers to " why does granny hurt animals " for an almost 3 year old. Death isn't on his radar screen yet. Lori ______________________ ______________________ Message: 3 Wed, 19 Mar 2003 11:15:04 -0500 C-Mendola <joplingv Explaining veg-issues to small children?? *****My son went through a phase where watching his relatives eat non-veg foods was upsetting to him. He would tell them 'you need to learn better', 'that's junky stuff', and question me as to 'how come Nana and Papa don't care about animals?' why don't they learn?' and 'Daddy Knows better! he doesn't listen!'.. My son's teacher has explained to him that everyone makes choices and decides what's right for them. She went on to say that it's okay that some people are vegetarians and others are not, blah blah... I have since had a conversation with her regarding this, and now she speaks with me first before discussing these types of things with my son. (It's fine and dandy that the world is full of all types of people, but what about the animals? How can my son understand how it's viewed as okay to hurt animals when I can't even understand it?! Yes, everyone can make their own choices, but why would Nana choose to eat what's left of a killed animal? Why would that be okay with her, and Papa, and Daddy, and his friends.. ?)******************* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 24, 2003 Report Share Posted March 24, 2003 Yeah, I would like to know that one too! We are just explaining it to our three year old, he loves animals and I can tell that when he heard that Ronald McD ate cows he was disgusted! Do you tell them that Grandma and Grandpa just don't like animals? OR that they just don't care? Sara But, I really, really need answers to " why does granny hurt animals " for an almost 3 year old. Death isn't on his radar screen yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 > Lori Lugar <llugar > Explaining veg-issues to small children?? > > So what do you tell him when he asks why does granny/daddy, etc. hurt > animals? You didn't seem to like the teacher's response about choices, but > you didn't say what you've told him. I really need to know. I posted this > question last year and didn't get any responses. My son is 2 1/2 (3 in > June) and knows he doesn't eat meat. He'll even ask me if something I'm > serving him has meat in it (!). He's also asked if the cup I'm giving him > is clean, so, who knows. But, I really, really need answers to " why does > granny hurt animals " for an almost 3 year old. Death isn't on his radar > screen yet. > > Lori Lori, It's hard to answer your question because every child is different and how you phrase the response depends largely on the child, whom you know and we don't. It also depends on the child's capacity for abstract thinking (as you pointed out, your ds doesn't understand death, so he's not there yet and discussions will hae to be simplistic). I tell my son that we're vegan because I don't want us to eat animals, that I think animals are not food. From there, if he asks, I can say that some people *do* think animals can be food, but I don't think that's right, or very nice to the animals. My son hasn't asked why Nana (or any one person in particular) hurts animals, but I guess first I'd explain that Nana (Granny, whoever) isn't the one who actually goes out and hurts the animal, someone else does it, so she doesn't think she's hurting the animal. (Simplistic, but concrete.) Your son might be satisfied with that, or he may want to know more. You could say that you don't really understand why some people eat meat and you wish they wouldn't, but that you can love those people anyway. Then I'd say something along the lines of, people have been eating animals for a long time, and it's hard for some people to change how they eat. Because it is. Maybe if you tell him, what if he had to stop eating the foods he loves and could only eat food he didn't like? Then you could say that Granny likes meat because for a long long time that's what she has eaten. Anyway, I don't know if that helps but really, you just have to take your cues from your son, and try to show that you are compassionate about your loved ones, too, as well as the animals. It's not like you have to have all the right answers right now (and believe me, there will be many many many more questions in the next few years that you couldn't answer properly no matter what!). I try to be creative and put myself in ds's mind (not easy!) when those questions come up, so as to sort of see where the question might be coming from. I'm always reminded of the story of the little kid who asked Daddy where did she come from. Stammering about birds and bees, she gaev him a funny look and said, " Susie came from Miami and Jack came from Atlanta, but where did I come from? " Today my ds asked, " Mommy, do you use sleep? " Huh? " I said, do you *use* sleep? " Asked him to clarify. " But what I said was, - do - you - use - sleep? " (Slowly and clearly, like I was going deaf.) Told him I heard him, I just didn't understand what he meant. " What I meant when I asked do you use sleep is, um, do you sleep? " Uh, okay, yeah.... Good luck. ~Doh --------- " There is *never* a good reason not to be as loving as you can possibly be. " ~Rob Brezny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 31, 2003 Report Share Posted March 31, 2003 I foresee a problem developing now that my daughter, who is almost 4, has a better understanding that we don't eat meat and that we are vegetarian. She and I were visiting my mother this weekend. After her initial reaction to my becoming vegetarian 14 years ago, my mother has actually been pretty supportive. When we go to her house (she lives a distance away, so we are talking a few times a year, not every week) she always makes sure that the food is vegetarian. Since I have become vegan (or pretty close), however, she has been more antagonistic and manages to make some comment or say something that can lead to a fight if I pursue it. Anyway, this weekend my DD was playing with some dolls and she asked me if they were vegetarian. I said they could be whatever she wanted them to be. Later, I was in another room, and I hear her telling grandma that the dolls are vegetarian. My mother says, " boy, you sure do like to bring that up alot, don't you. " Then she says, " who tells you these things? " DD says, " mommy and daddy. " Of course, DD is not challenging my mother on her eating habits, but I fear that my mother will take these comments that way and will pursue it with her. I don't want DD to have to deal with that. I'm used to backing down with my mother on things, because she has strongly held opinions, will not change them and in the end I always get in trouble for voicing my opinion. DD just keeps insisting on her position, which drives my mother nuts, I'm sure. I wonder if I should tell DD not to mention vegetarian things around grandma? But I don't think that's fair to DD either. Plus, I spent my entire childhood being told not to speak up because this person or that person in the family wouldn't like it, and as far as I can see by no one speaking up a lot of problems occurred that might have been avoided. Karen - Doh! Monday, March 31, 2003 2:18 AM Re: Explaining veg-issues to small children?? .Lori, It's hard to answer your question because every child is different and how you phrase the response depends largely on the child, whom you know and we don't. It also depends on the child's capacity for abstract thinking (as you pointed out, your ds doesn't understand death, so he's not there yet and discussions will hae to be simplistic). I tell my son that we're vegan because I don't want us to eat animals, that I think animals are not food. From there, if he asks, I can say that some people *do* think animals can be food, but I don't think that's right, or very nice to the animals. My son hasn't asked why Nana (or any one person in particular) hurts animals, but I guess first I'd explain that Nana (Granny, whoever) isn't the one who actually goes out and hurts the animal, someone else does it, so she doesn't think she's hurting the animal. (Simplistic, but concrete.) Your son might be satisfied with that, or he may want to know more. You could say that you don't really understand why some people eat meat and you wish they wouldn't, but that you can love those people anyway. Then I'd say something along the lines of, people have been eating animals for a long time, and it's hard for some people to change how they eat. Because it is. Maybe if you tell him, what if he had to stop eating the foods he loves and could only eat food he didn't like? Then you could say that Granny likes meat because for a long long time that's what she has eaten. Anyway, I don't know if that helps but really, you just have to take your cues from your son, and try to show that you are compassionate about your loved ones, too, as well as the animals. It's not like you have to have all the right answers right now (and believe me, there will be many many many more questions in the next few years that you couldn't answer properly no matter what!). I try to be creative and put myself in ds's mind (not easy!) when those questions come up, so as to sort of see where the question might be coming from. I'm always reminded of the story of the little kid who asked Daddy where did she come from. Stammering about birds and bees, she gaev him a funny look and said, " Susie came from Miami and Jack came from Atlanta, but where did I come from? " Today my ds asked, " Mommy, do you use sleep? " Huh? " I said, do you *use* sleep? " Asked him to clarify. " But what I said was, - do - you - use - sleep? " (Slowly and clearly, like I was going deaf.) Told him I heard him, I just didn't understand what he meant. " What I meant when I asked do you use sleep is, um, do you sleep? " Uh, okay, yeah.... Good luck. ~Doh --------- " There is *never* a good reason not to be as loving as you can possibly be. " ~Rob Brezny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 1, 2003 Report Share Posted April 1, 2003 Thanks for your response. I *think* it will be helpful; I'll try it out next time the subject comes up. His latest hard-to-answer question has been " where does fire live when it's not on fire? " That was a toughy! Lori ____ Message: 4 Mon, 31 Mar 2003 02:18:28 -0500 Doh! <dohdriver Re: Explaining veg-issues to small children?? > Lori Lugar <llugar > Explaining veg-issues to small children?? > > So what do you tell him when he asks why does granny/daddy, etc. hurt > animals? You didn't seem to like the teacher's response about choices, but > you didn't say what you've told him. I really need to know. I posted this > question last year and didn't get any responses. My son is 2 1/2 (3 in > June) and knows he doesn't eat meat. He'll even ask me if something I'm > serving him has meat in it (!). He's also asked if the cup I'm giving him > is clean, so, who knows. But, I really, really need answers to " why does > granny hurt animals " for an almost 3 year old. Death isn't on his radar > screen yet. > > Lori Lori, It's hard to answer your question because every child is different and how you phrase the response depends largely on the child, whom you know and we don't. It also depends on the child's capacity for abstract thinking (as you pointed out, your ds doesn't understand death, so he's not there yet and discussions will hae to be simplistic). I tell my son that we're vegan because I don't want us to eat animals, that I think animals are not food. From there, if he asks, I can say that some people *do* think animals can be food, but I don't think that's right, or very nice to the animals. My son hasn't asked why Nana (or any one person in particular) hurts animals, but I guess first I'd explain that Nana (Granny, whoever) isn't the one who actually goes out and hurts the animal, someone else does it, so she doesn't think she's hurting the animal. (Simplistic, but concrete.) Your son might be satisfied with that, or he may want to know more. You could say that you don't really understand why some people eat meat and you wish they wouldn't, but that you can love those people anyway. Then I'd say something along the lines of, people have been eating animals for a long time, and it's hard for some people to change how they eat. Because it is. Maybe if you tell him, what if he had to stop eating the foods he loves and could only eat food he didn't like? Then you could say that Granny likes meat because for a long long time that's what she has eaten. Anyway, I don't know if that helps but really, you just have to take your cues from your son, and try to show that you are compassionate about your loved ones, too, as well as the animals. It's not like you have to have all the right answers right now (and believe me, there will be many many many more questions in the next few years that you couldn't answer properly no matter what!). I try to be creative and put myself in ds's mind (not easy!) when those questions come up, so as to sort of see where the question might be coming from. I'm always reminded of the story of the little kid who asked Daddy where did she come from. Stammering about birds and bees, she gaev him a funny look and said, " Susie came from Miami and Jack came from Atlanta, but where did I come from? " Today my ds asked, " Mommy, do you use sleep? " Huh? " I said, do you *use* sleep? " Asked him to clarify. " But what I said was, - do - you - use - sleep? " (Slowly and clearly, like I was going deaf.) Told him I heard him, I just didn't understand what he meant. " What I meant when I asked do you use sleep is, um, do you sleep? " Uh, okay, yeah.... Good luck. ~Doh --------- " There is *never* a good reason not to be as loving as you can possibly be. " ~Rob Brezny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 2, 2003 Report Share Posted April 2, 2003 > His latest hard-to-answer question has been " where does fire live when it's > not on fire? " That was a toughy! Try it lives in the sun and in the air when it's not on earth being fire. Seemed to work with my curious son. Peace, Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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