Reply to several mails

[Guest guest]

Hello people,

 

I'm going to reply to several mails

which are addressed to me in a single mail, instead of writing one at

the time.

--------------------------

 

Dear Dragon

If you had really understood Ramana

teachings,there wouldn't be any questions coming up like yours about

what to do or not to do, it will just come on its own.

 

Marifa

---

Hello Marifa, (I am flattered that I

become "Dragon" instead Dragan. My name means: dear, nice : )

 

To 'understand' someting, is not the

same as live it. To digest it. To resolve some doubts. In logical

terms, Ramana's teaching is very clear and flawless. As I said, gjana

was not to know something. It is a deep personal experience.

Then you 'know'. I

suppose that you have what I don't have, if you have this kind of

comment. You should be at the half way to sahaja samadhi. Are you? Or

you just cite Ramana?

I was talking about questions (again,

I say that I've resolved them in degree that they are not an obstacle

for me. I was so attracted to Ramaman, but to 'lose myself' = ego, that

was nothing but dying for me. I had to reach some answer, because I was

in a very bad situation: I coldn't go forward or to give up.) You want

to say that your mind don't have tricks to preserve

its old functioning? If you know and understand Ramana teachings,

everything is clear? Yes, if you want to write a book. But, what is

happening inside? In your life, in your practice?

I met several people who is always repeating: "Yes, I feel Ramana's

presence". Or when I had something to ask, they used the 'standard'

approach: "Who is asking this question?" It seems that people don't

recognize our intelect and our mind. Intelect can say: "Smoking is

bad." But our mind is a long - distance runner, it is the one who must

execute our decision. So, many people smoke, even they know that it is

bad for them. Their intelect is OK, but their mind is so weak and full

of doubts.

All of these 'repeating' and 'wise' people are not Ramana's followers

anymore. Because they just 'understood' Ramana, without any test of his

teachings in their lives. Buddha says: "Don't believe me, examine my

words in practice." My questions are my past. My questions are directed

to the other people. That Ramana's path is not a game. From the

beginning (too much thoughts, problems with vichara...) to the end (the

final 'dying' experience. There is no sage who can say that it was a

very pleasant experiece).

I don't know, maybe I am very complicated and stupid, but I can't

imagine that any person can read Ramana and directly apply his words.

Without any other living guru, to start from scratch to change

him/herself. Without any inner doubts or even fears?

 

I don't need you anymore, all Ramana's followers, am free if we

talking about my necessity to belong to some group. But, as Anthony de

Mello says, it is my choice to be with my tribe, with all of you. But

if you go, my inner orchestra will continue playing. You are right, I

have no questions, because I had to think about them and to resolve

them all. I know now were I am going and what is my path. If you asked

me a couple years ago, I was able to resolve problems with karma - free

will, and many other issues, but I was so attached to my ego, that it

was terrible. And I didn't want to let Ramana go. I got stuck for

years. In the middle of a very good practice, my mind would ask: "Do

you really want to kill me? Everything is aleady IT, so why don't let

me live?" I am not a sage, so it must be this natural moments of

doubts. Even if ego survive in some degree, we are not the same. When I

shout: "I don't want to be a sage!", I was transformed, something in me

will never be the same. Some kind of unbound feeling is inside me. But,

to ask that questions, I had to wait for 10 years! So, it is not so

simple: 'the higher power will lead us'. There is something as effort,

and a powerful wish to follow your inner being.

 

Anyway, thank you for your comment.