hello, just found this group...

April 27, 2003

I am a vegan mom of 3 - 6yr old dd, 3yr old ds, and 3mo old foster

ds. I am the only actual vegan in the family, as of 2 years, but my

household is entirely vegan (except for a few old leather items that

haven't yet worn out). Dh and the kids may infrequently eat some

dairy, etc. outside the home but very seldom do any of them eat any

meat, if at all. I'm letting my daughter figure out for herself what

she'd like to do, and for a 6 year old she has a pretty good

understanding of the issues- but it's hard for her to remain true to

her vegetarian decision because she's the only vegetarian kid she

knows (well- other than her little brother). Twice she has eaten meat

when she was around other kids, but afterwards she feels very sad. I

want her to make her own decisions on the subject because I'm afraid

that if she feels pressured she'll think that eating meat is a

forbidden thing- hence it is necessary to sneak around and eat it.

Instead, I've given her a lot of facts that most children her age are

unaware of, I've told her about my reasons for being vegan- health,

environmental, moral, etc... and I'm letting her do what makes sense

to her. As I said, she has chosen vegetarianism, but it has been

difficult for her. That's what led me to this board- I'm looking for

parents experienced with situations like this, and also hoped that

perhaps there might be a vegan or vegetarian child that would benefit

from exchanging e-mails with my daughter. I think that would help her

feel a bit less different and strange. I know that she wants to

believe that being veggie is cool, but that's tough when all of the

other kids in her small world seem to be against the idea.

Glad to have found this group... ~paisley

April 29, 2003

My kids have been vegi since birth & my older one is just starting to be

truly bothered that all of her friends eat meat. She is 4 1/2 & has been at

preschool for almost 2 yrs. I don't think that she knew that she was in the

minority until she started school.

Anyway, I have put up a bunch of flyers around town (at the health food

store,etc.) looking for other vegi kids for a playgroup or to get together.

I also searched the database on veggiebaby.com for parents in my area. I

haven't had a lot of luck, but do have some potential contacts. You may want

to try something similar to find other vegetarian kids so that your kids

don't feel like oddballs.

Also, I found my older daughter a vegetarian pen pal via vegfamily.com. I

just posted a thread looking for a pen pal on the discussion boards. She has

2 kids writing back & forth at the moment, so I don't think, at age 4, she

can deal with too much more, but you may want to check there, too.

Christa

April 29, 2003

Welcome Paisley!

Unfortunately, I wont be able to be much help to you. I am a new

vegetarian, and the rest of my family is not. I have 2 boys, 4 1/2

and 6, and they are dedicated dairy/meat consumers. I might have a

better chance at helping them change if Grandma didn't live with us.

She told me to " skip " being vegetarian when I go to Paris next week.

I feel for you and your daughter. It is hard for a grownup to be

different, I can only imagine how a child feels. Its amazing that

children start putting pressure on others at such a young age. Kids

deal with a lot these days.

I'm sure you'll get plenty of help and support from others on the

group who are facing the same things. Just wanted to welcome you. I

admire you and all who are raising their families as

vegan/vegetarian. I wish I had known then what I know now...

Peace,

Laura

, " paisley_394 " <paisgreen@h...>

wrote:

> I am a vegan mom of 3 - 6yr old dd, 3yr old ds, and 3mo old foster

> ds. I am the only actual vegan in the family, as of 2 years, but my

> household is entirely vegan (except for a few old leather items

that

> haven't yet worn out). Dh and the kids may infrequently eat some

> dairy, etc. outside the home but very seldom do any of them eat any

> meat, if at all. I'm letting my daughter figure out for herself

what

> she'd like to do, and for a 6 year old she has a pretty good

> understanding of the issues- but it's hard for her to remain true

to

> her vegetarian decision because she's the only vegetarian kid she

> knows (well- other than her little brother). Twice she has eaten

meat

> when she was around other kids, but afterwards she feels very sad.

I

> want her to make her own decisions on the subject because I'm

afraid

> that if she feels pressured she'll think that eating meat is a

> forbidden thing- hence it is necessary to sneak around and eat it.

> Instead, I've given her a lot of facts that most children her age

are

> unaware of, I've told her about my reasons for being vegan- health,

> environmental, moral, etc... and I'm letting her do what makes

sense

> to her. As I said, she has chosen vegetarianism, but it has been

> difficult for her. That's what led me to this board- I'm looking

for

> parents experienced with situations like this, and also hoped that

> perhaps there might be a vegan or vegetarian child that would

benefit

> from exchanging e-mails with my daughter. I think that would help

her

> feel a bit less different and strange. I know that she wants to

> believe that being veggie is cool, but that's tough when all of the

> other kids in her small world seem to be against the idea.

>

> Glad to have found this group... ~paisley

April 30, 2003

Hi, Paisley! My name is Natalie. I have a 5 year old step-daughter,

Amora, who lives with us part time, and this is the balance in our veg

family, I think. Her father, who is 23, has been veg for about 10 years,

as have I, and my 4 year old son Solstice is also a vegetarian, and so

is our baby, Ryan, who is 8 months. This has been a difficult issue

throughout the years, and I have just learned to view it as a health

issue rather than a moral decision. Oldest child loves spaghetti from a

can. Middle child has not been raised on junk food, quite the contrary,

but has serious love for the sweet stuff. He spends a lot of time at his

grandmother's house, and she has learned that her best bet is to provide

alternatives, but she is not a vegetarian and I just finally realized

that she feeds him very healthy foods and follows all of the other

dietary guidelines that I have for my children and I just let go and let

him make his own decisions about what he will and won't eat. Derek's

mother, however, is a fan of fruit roll-ups, and has rarely ever shopped

at health food stores. My children eat what they eat and how they eat

because of how I feed them. Often, we have discussions about what each

and every food is made out of and they make their decisions based on the

information we provide them. I feel that our job as parents is to teach

our children how to make healthy and informed choices about what they

use and eat because it has effects on everything, not just because

eating animals is mean and gross. If her friends harass her about HER

choice to abstain from animal products, she could simply inform them

that the food they eat is made of dead animals; not to be harsh, but the

truth is often the only thing that works. If they have issues about the

way you eat, she could just say " every person can choose what they eat. "

Or just tell them some of the reasons that you have told her that you

are veg. I explain things to the fullest extent that I can with my

children. I don't like that my mom thought that " it's good for you " or

" it's bad for you " was enough information to sustain my decisions

throughout my teenage years. I tell my kids, " white sugar is bleached

and it makes your body feel bad and run funny even though it may taste

good. " And then I feed them something with all natural sweeteners in it

and tell them afterwards, " That didn't need bleached sugar, did it? "

That is usually followed by " yeah, mom, and apples are my favorite and

they don't have that sugar in them " They can go back and forth for and

hour about the things we discuss. I do feel for your daughter, I know I

didn't like explaining my vegetarianism at 14, I can't imagine defending

it at 6. Information is power!! Also, try to find her some books and

stuff about hunter gatherer cultures and predominantly veg cultures;

that may help her out.

Love,

Natalie Joy &

her boys

paisley_394 [paisgreen]

Sunday, April 27, 2003 2:24 PM