[100% veg*n ] Help! Social adjustments to veganism...

[Guest guest]

Hey there!

 

First, welcome!

 

I went throught that, and I'm still kinda going through that. But the way I

handle it, I don't even let people get the chance to make me feel isolated,

awkward or upset...I make it very clear that veganism is MY chosen lifestyle.

My parents hated the idea at first, mainly because they were not used to having

a vegan at the dinner table (and me rejecting 80% of the gifts they give me!)

but I told them that if they love me, they should respect my decision and

understand that any dispute over my decision is uncalled for. As for my

friends, my best friend asked me, " How the hell are you going to survive you

carnivorous, designer-craving shopaholic??? No more leather, no more down

quilts, no more blah, blah, blah! " I told her that as my (best) friend, the

last thing I needed was discouragement over my decision, I just needed her

support, and if I couldn't get that from her, I would be utterly disappointed.

I also encountered non-vegans asking me silly things like, " You know the soap

you use contains animal fats, right? " And I go, " You know there's such a thing

called vegetable glycerin that they can use in place of the animal ones, right? "

People have tried this way and that to make a fool out of me for being vegan. I

tried my best not to give them a chance, so it's great that you're already

reading up on a lot about veganism!

 

I know that not-telling-people-you're-vegan thing, I don't tell people I'm vegan

until they get to know me better, so as to avoid prejudice, but I can only

withold that info if I don't eat with them before they have gotten to know me

better! Not telling people you're vegan works in some situations where you're

just not in the mood for unnecessary debates over the issue, and this issue is

one which meateaters tend to take SO personally that they completely miss the

idea behind being vegan.

 

Advice...hmmm...I would say... (ok, this may not sound like much advice but)

take it easy and go with the flow. Educate your loved ones on the benefits of

veganism and that it is NOT a personal attack on them! By going vegan, you did

NOT announce that you have now turned against THEM. I'm sure your friends will

adjust to your change, and that's what everyone around you needs to do - adjust.

They really don't have another option. Try not to feel guilty should they begin

to offer going to vegan-friendly restaurants, for example, because it would only

work when THEY give in, not you. Don't let people make you feel selfish because

others must give in to your needs, because non-vegans eat anything and

everything, while vegans don't...they may make a point that you chose not to eat

this and that, but if this occurs, lay before them your reasons for becoming a

vegan AGAIN, sometimes people can become forgetful!

 

By the way, start cooking! Vegan cooking is so much funner and grocery shopping

- as long as you steer clear of the meat sections - cannot be any better! When

I first went vegan, I began to see so many products that I had overlooked before

because the attention was always on the meat.

 

Don't worry, you'll be fine! You can always turn to us for EXTRA support!

 

Good luck! And Have Fun!

 

Honor

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

hey

if i had a boyfriend, and he didnt respect my decisions then i would

wonder where the relationship was going. talk to him and tell him that

this is something important to you and you would feel better about all

the pressure if he would staqnd by you. and remember, YOURE the one whose

in the right. theyre the ones slaughtering innocent animals, spreading

diseases such as mad cow disease, foot and mouth, salmonella, e coli,

etc... all out of convenience and profit. sometimes it makes me mad when

people question my desicion, but i know that thats just what they have

been trained to do. i usually dont take it personally and i hope you

dont think that i am some elitist vegan. i dont think im better than

anyone i just think theres been a lot of unfortunate agricultural practices

that people are blind of. the problem i have is when people STILL dont

accept it and make fun of me after i explain the reasons to them. those

are the people that have no compassion. my definition of suffering just

happens to include all creatures that suffer. does that really sound

all that crazy? and if they try to make you think that it IS crazy then

maybe you should hang out with someone else. nobody likes to feel bad

about their decisions. i think its great that you are vegan! YAY!!

spiggy

--

Priscilla Pelkey

spiggy - email

(210) 576-2701 x5770 - voicemail/fax

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

annis_seed wrote:

>

> I am a new vegan and have been able to find a lot of information

> about diets/nutrition etc but I can find NO information about

> social/family responses to veganism.

 

They vary.

 

> My problem is not what I eat,

> the problem is my boyfriend doesn't like the " idea " of me being vegan

> (despite the fact we mainly ate vego before my veganism). I need

> coping mechanisms!

 

You need coping mechanisms for your *boyfriend*?

 

Well, it depends what their problem is:

* " You're vegan, so you must be an extremist "

* You'll waste away

* It's so difficult

 

If they have a genuine concern for your health, then get a copy of Vegan

Nutrition, and take care of your Iron, Calcium, B12, and Iodine. And do

take care - some vegans do get ill because they are not getting

nutrients they miss because they're not taking any care at all. Overall,

vegans live longer. Make sure they know that. Consider getting the

colourful vitamin and mineral wallchart to stick on your wall where

genuinely concerned people can see it.

 

Personally, I don't feel that veganism is extreme. It's just living off

plants. Locking 30,000 hens in a shed, on wire they can't stand on, with

a A4-sized area each, and not cleaning their shit and corpses out so

that people need breathing apparatus to enter ... that's extreme.

 

> And it is not only my boyfriend - my best friend

> thinks I'm crazy, " how are we going to eat out? " etc. I find myself

> not telling anyone I am vegan just to avoid the backlash. Any advice?

>

 

Eating out is more difficult, because you have to trust other people to

respect your profoundly held beliefs. Trust is based on knowing someone,

and restaurants are run by strangers. Veggie restaurants tend to be

okay.

 

Learning to cook vegan is a great alternative. And tends to convince

people that vegan food is good.

 

Alex (author of Vegan London) has a good comment " Being vegan is dead

easy when you know how " . I'd suggest reading a couple of books, and not

worrying if you get something non-vegan by accident, or there's

something you can't cut out.

 

--

Ian McDonald

 

http://www.mcdonald.me.uk/

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/3/02 6:20:39 AM Pacific Standard Time,

ian writes:

 

<< If they have a genuine concern for your health, then get a copy of Vegan

Nutrition, and take care of your Iron, Calcium, B12, and Iodine. And do

take care - some vegans do get ill because they are not getting

nutrients they miss because they're not taking any care at all. Overall,

vegans live longer. Make sure they know that. Consider getting the

colourful vitamin and mineral wallchart to stick on your wall where

genuinely concerned people can see it. >>

 

 

sorry...i still feel that the " normal " population has a bigger problem with

nutrition then the average vegan.........everything except B!2 is readily

available to a vegan diet, as long as you ain't eatin crap......

[Guest guest]

yeah most vitamins are shite anyway. they either arent the natural form

of the vatamin and thus are not absorbed or they have a ridiculous amount

of things you dont need. like if you go into holland and barrett for

example, probably 99% of their vitamins arent vegan in the first place,

and delving further into the daily value, youll see that theres usually

more than 100% of all the B vitamins. i think its B6 that accumulates

in the body and can become toxic in high levels. otehr things such as

'tocopherols' (vitamin E) yeah but which one it is? there are two forms

of tocopheral, and one of them is completely useless to the human body.

i want to know if its going to be absorbed!! what a waste of money.

spiggy

 

--

Priscilla Pelkey

spiggy - email

(210) 576-2701 x5770 - voicemail/fax

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

EBbrewpunx wrote:

>

> In a message dated 3/3/02 6:20:39 AM Pacific Standard Time,

> ian writes:

>

> << If they have a genuine concern for your health, then get a copy of Vegan

> Nutrition, and take care of your Iron, Calcium, B12, and Iodine. And do

> take care - some vegans do get ill because they are not getting

> nutrients they miss because they're not taking any care at all. Overall,

> vegans live longer. Make sure they know that. Consider getting the

> colourful vitamin and mineral wallchart to stick on your wall where

> genuinely concerned people can see it. >>

>

> sorry...i still feel that the " normal " population has a bigger problem with

> nutrition then the average vegan.........everything except B!2 is readily

> available to a vegan diet, as long as you ain't eatin crap......

>

 

Well, actually, if you are eating crap, then all the micronutrients are

available, including B12.

 

--

Ian McDonald

 

http://www.mcdonald.me.uk/

[Guest guest]

not advocating that

wot i'm saying is, as long as you eat a balanced vegan diet, wot is to worry

about?

 

non-vegans make such a damn issue of vegan nutritions, as they belly up to the

local taco bell and soak up some fat..its silly

 

face it..with a good balanced vegan diet, you will not have problems...

i am gettin sick of hearin about " where do you get yer protein? " all the dang ol

time....

silly silly silly

fraggle

 

Dr Ian McDonald <ian wrote:

 

>

>

>EBbrewpunx wrote:

>>

>> In a message dated 3/3/02 6:20:39 AM Pacific Standard Time,

>> ian writes:

>>

>> << If they have a genuine concern for your health, then get a copy of Vegan

>> Nutrition, and take care of your Iron, Calcium, B12, and Iodine. And do

>> take care - some vegans do get ill because they are not getting

>> nutrients they miss because they're not taking any care at all. Overall,

>> vegans live longer. Make sure they know that. Consider getting the

>> colourful vitamin and mineral wallchart to stick on your wall where

>> genuinely concerned people can see it. >>

>>

>> sorry...i still feel that the " normal " population has a bigger problem with

>> nutrition then the average vegan.........everything except B!2 is readily

>> available to a vegan diet, as long as you ain't eatin crap......

>

>Simply because omnis and veggies tend to be overweight doesn't mean we

>should take our eye off the ball.

>

>--

>Ian McDonald

>

>http://www.mcdonald.me.uk/

>

>

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