Fw: NOTMILK Digest Number 209

[Guest guest]

Sat, 03 Feb 2001 07:35:04 -0500

Robert Cohen <i4crob

-YEAR OF THE SNAKE

 

YEAR OF THE SNAKE

 

The Chinese are now celebrating their 4,699th

new year, the Year of the Snake. To the Chinese,

the Year of the Snake is a time to be cautious.

To the Chinese, the snake represents an underlying

threat. This year, mainland China will be welcoming

in the year of the dairy cow, a real threat.

 

The Chinese have an inferiority complex. They've seen

the Japanese people grow an average of two inches

over the last two generations (40 years) while their

heights have remained stable. In order to attain the

same physical growth, the Chinese government has

been working closely with America's dairy industry,

recognizing that growth hormones in milk are the

missing link keeping them from attaining the same

stature as the Japanese.

 

The Chinese are developing enormous state-of-the-art

10,000-cow dairy farms, but they do not have the

same fully developed power and electric resources

as do the Americans or Japanese. Refrigerators are not

found in every home. How to cool and store the milk?

That problem has been solved.

 

The first Chinese-made fully automatic, milk packing

equipment has been manufactured by the Anhui

Keyuan Group. They will now put the milk into

Parmalat-style shelf stable containers. Who will

drink the half-pint cartons? School children.

 

The Chinese dairy industry has targeted kids. Their

method is to borrow another appropriately named

American marketing tool, Looney Tunes.

 

Warner Brothers has developed a licensing deal with the

Chinese so that milk cartons will include " fun-filled flavor "

for Chinese consumers.

 

Perhaps we should send the Chinese some fun-filled

x-ray machines, hip replacement devices, and heart valves.

They'll soon be needing them.

 

I dread the thought of what happens when Porky the

Moo-Shu Pig meets Peking-Daffy Duck at Shanghai's

new dairy bar. Indigestion? Osteoporosis? Heart

disease, asthma, and cancer? Choose one from column

A and one from column B. An American menu for

American diseases. One glass of milk and thirty minutes

later, the Chinese will be wanting more.

 

Robert Cohen

http://www.notmilk.com