Having It All.

[Guest guest]

Dear Doug,<br><br>I'm very glad you liked the

last post.<br><br>Secretly though, I was hoping you

would tell me I could have it all: I could have love

and plenty, I could have Raw and McDonald's.<br><br>I

mean I really like Raw and I really like McDonald's.

Like Sophie I would go mad if I had to choose between

them. It looks like the impossible choice.<br><br>But

it was as though I heard your voice drifting down

from the southern-most tip of the US, saying, 'Go on,

Vic, you can do it, and I know you won't break my

legs'.<br><br>So I stood outside McDonald's looking into the

warmth and the friendliness, knowing I couldn't go in.

But still I heard your encouragement. And just as I

was about to give up, I looked into the supermarket

and there were all these fruit and vegetables. And it

was as though a light went on inside my head and

without pausing I went straight into the supermarket and

bought a big bag of fruit and then straight into

McDonald's. My heart was beating but I ate all my fruit

without buying fude from Big Mac. No problems. I had my

cake and ate it too. Or rather, my fruit. And I

couldn't have done it without you.<br><br>I keep telling

myself, no two nations under the golden arches have ever

gone to war. So I figure it's OK to take my fruit into

McDonald's to eat.<br><br>Sophie, eat your heart

out!<br><br>Victor.

[Guest guest]

Victor! No 2 nations under the golden arches have ever gone to war? REALLY?

And I thought world peace was only achievable one individual at a time. Over 5

billion have already been served!

[Guest guest]

Dear Leafygreens,<br><br>I do like your name and

indeed I have a bag of leafygreens right beside me. And

as well anyone from southern Oregon can't be all

bad. While it is plain anyone from New South Wales can

be.<br><br>Why, we recently had a countrywomen of yours lecture

us on this very topic. She started off by telling us

we had a wonderful sense of humour, only, she said,

it is a destructive sense of humour. It is cynical,

she said. It is funny at first but after a while it

is corrosive. It destroys self-esteem, she said. It

could even be offensive.<br><br>Naturally we take you

as our role-model. But we are incorrigible: we can't

help laughing at the first sign of

cynicism.<br><br>Even His Mother said, " He's not the Messiah, He's just

a naughty boy! " <br><br>Victor.