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Pleasure vs. Joy

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Sounds great, Caron!! I'm not suggesting that we forgo pleasure. Rather,

I['m suggesting that we gain clarity about the distinction between clarity

between pleasure and joy, so that we may choose consciously.

 

Best,

Elchanan

 

_____

 

rawfood [rawfood ] On Behalf Of

Caron

Thursday, July 05, 2007 6:28 PM

rawfood

Re: [Raw Food] Herbs & Toxins; Natural Hygiene Notes; On Variety

and Sufficiency (WAS: What is " enough " of a bitter green? Does the body

store nutrients?)

 

 

>I have learned to shift my perception about all of this. First, I now

perceive food and eating primarily in association with self-care, not

pleasure. There are many, many other sources for pleasure. Second, I've

learned to distinguish pleasure, which is fleeting, from joy, which is

sustaining and genuinely uplifting. I now seek and create much more joy in

my life than I did for many years ... and I find that doing so requires much

less effort. Genuine joy has a self-maintaining, self-sustaining quality, as

does genuine health.

 

That's given me something to think about, thank you. I must say though, I

got

a great shot of pleasure last week, when we picked up our fruits'n'veg, and

got a whole case of bananas, and fresh dates, mmm ;o)

 

Caron

 

 

 

 

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-

Elchanan

>I'm not suggesting that we forgo pleasure. Rather,

I['m suggesting that we gain clarity about the distinction between clarity

between pleasure and joy, so that we may choose consciously.

 

I think that's what a lot of people (myself included) have trouble with,

which is why your original paragraph:

 

" I have learned to shift my perception about all of this. First, I now

perceive food and eating primarily in association with self-care, not

pleasure. There are many, many other sources for pleasure. Second, I've

learned to distinguish pleasure, which is fleeting, from joy, which is

sustaining and genuinely uplifting. I now seek and create much more joy in

my life than I did for many years ... and I find that doing so requires much

less effort. Genuine joy has a self-maintaining, self-sustaining quality, as

does genuine health. "

 

hit home. A lot of people (myself included, until recent years), equate food

with love. Parents reward with food, or punish with food, family times are

often centred around meals (christmas dinner, thanksgiving, birthdays, are

all about the food). Even pottying is taught using foods as incentive! I was

aware enough to make a decision never to use food as anything other than

fuel, for my child(ren), and that woke me up enough to realise that's how I

saw it myself, in some regards.

 

In addition, a lot of people seek " happiness " , but they really don't know

what it means! Happiness can mean anything from more money to spend, more

computer gadgets, going out partying and drinking enough to pass out, more

sex, more food, or whatever their particular drug is. Those things don't

make them happy though, because as soon as they're on their own, the world

comes crashing back in. They avoid having a family, because they want to be

happy, they avoid working because they want to be happy. They want to have

fun, not responsibility. A lot of parents I know don't make their kids do

chores because they want them to be happy and have fun. Those kids grow up,

and have to get a job, and suddenly become unhappy. Again, I made a

decision, that while being happy is a bonus, I'd rather my son be content -

content to work, content to play, content with his family and/or friends, or

on his own. If you're constantly between happiness and unhappiness, it gets

exhausting. If you can feel those emotions from a contented resting place,

it's so much easier. I'm still working out how to achieve this for myself

;o) I've been on the verge a few times, enough to know that's how I want to

live. Somehow your statement that " pleasure is fleeting, joy is sustaining "

was really profound, and one of the key pieces I've been looking for.

Another work in progress :o)

 

Caron

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I will have to disagree here. I have raised 3 children of my own and

been involved with many more. Sometimes children are happy, many

times they are not. And that begins with the second they are born.

 

Their happiness depends on their wants and needs and whether or not

they are being met. And many times they don't even know what they want

or what they need.:o) Pretty much like adults.

The human race is very demanding as a whole.

 

 

Belinda

 

 

 

Happiness is the natural state of

> little children, to whom the kingdom belongs until they have been

> polluted and contaminated by the stupidity of society and culture.  

> To acquire happiness you don't have to do anything, because happiness

> cannot be acquired.  

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On Friday 06 July 2007 06:10, Caron wrote:

> In addition, a lot of people seek " happiness " , but they really don't know

> what it means! Happiness can mean anything from more money to spend, more

> computer gadgets, going out partying and drinking enough to pass out, more

> sex, more food, or whatever their particular drug is. Those things don't

> make them happy though, because as soon as they're on their own, the world

> comes crashing back in. They avoid having a family, because they want to be

> happy, they avoid working because they want to be happy. They want to have

> fun, not responsibility. A lot of parents I know don't make their kids do

> chores because they want them to be happy and have fun. Those kids grow up,

> and have to get a job, and suddenly become unhappy. Again, I made a

> decision, that while being happy is a bonus, I'd rather my son be content -

> content to work, content to play, content with his family and/or friends,

> or on his own. If you're constantly between happiness and unhappiness, it

> gets exhausting. If you can feel those emotions from a contented resting

> place, it's so much easier. I'm still working out how to achieve this for

> myself ;o) I've been on the verge a few times, enough to know that's how I

> want to live. Somehow your statement that " pleasure is fleeting, joy is

> sustaining " was really profound, and one of the key pieces I've been

> looking for. Another work in progress :o)

>

> Caron

 

 

===============================================

Do you want to be happy?  Uninterrupted happiness is uncaused.  True

happiness is uncaused.  You cannot make me happy.  You are not my

happiness.  You say to the awakened person, " Why are you happy? " and

the awakened person replies, " Why not? "

 

Happiness is our natural state.  Happiness is the natural state of

little children, to whom the kingdom belongs until they have been

polluted and contaminated by the stupidity of society and culture.  

To acquire happiness you don't have to do anything, because happiness

cannot be acquired.  Does anybody know why?  Because we have it

already.  How can you acquire what you already have?  Then why don't

you experience it?  Because you've got to drop something.  You've got

to drop illusions.  You don't have to add anything in order to be

happy; you've got to drop something.  Life is easy, life is

delightful.  It's only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your

greed, your cravings.  Do you know where these things come from?  

From having identified with all kinds of labels!

 

 

Anthony de Mello, SJ

===============================================

extracted chapter 24 - Obstacles to Happiness

from " Awareness "

by Anthony de Mello SJ.

 

 

neal.

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Hi Caron,

 

Yes, when one experiences genuine happiness, that craving for more stuff

just vanishes. This does not mean an end to all forms of desire, but rather

an end to any sense of NEEDING those things in order to be " happy " .

 

Yes, the pleasure is fleeting, joy is sustaining! :) And we can well

experience both ... as long as we learn to distinguish between the two.

Elchanan

_____

 

rawfood [rawfood ] On Behalf Of

Caron

Thursday, July 05, 2007 11:11 PM

rawfood

Re: [Raw Food] Pleasure vs. Joy

 

Elchanan I'm not suggesting that we forgo pleasure. Rather, I['m

suggesting that we gain clarity about the distinction between clarity

between pleasure and joy, so that we may choose consciously.

 

I think that's what a lot of people (myself included) have trouble with,

which is why your original paragraph:

 

" I have learned to shift my perception about all of this. First, I now

perceive food and eating primarily in association with self-care, not

pleasure. There are many, many other sources for pleasure. Second, I've

learned to distinguish pleasure, which is fleeting, from joy, which is

sustaining and genuinely uplifting. I now seek and create much more joy in

my life than I did for many years ... and I find that doing so requires

much less effort. Genuine joy has a self-maintaining, self-sustaining

quality, as does genuine health. "

 

hit home. A lot of people (myself included, until recent years), equate

food with love. Parents reward with food, or punish with food, family times

are often centred around meals (christmas dinner, thanksgiving, birthdays,

are all about the food). Even pottying is taught using foods as incentive!

I was aware enough to make a decision never to use food as anything other

than fuel, for my child(ren), and that woke me up enough to realise that's

how I saw it myself, in some regards.

 

In addition, a lot of people seek " happiness " , but they really don't know

what it means! Happiness can mean anything from more money to spend, more

computer gadgets, going out partying and drinking enough to pass out, more

sex, more food, or whatever their particular drug is. Those things don't

make them happy though, because as soon as they're on their own, the world

comes crashing back in. They avoid having a family, because they want to be

happy, they avoid working because they want to be happy. They want to have

fun, not responsibility. A lot of parents I know don't make their kids do

chores because they want them to be happy and have fun. Those kids grow up,

and have to get a job, and suddenly become unhappy. Again, I made a

decision, that while being happy is a bonus, I'd rather my son be content -

content to work, content to play, content with his family and/or friends, or

on his own. If you're constantly between happiness and unhappiness, it gets

exhausting. If you can feel those emotions from a contented resting place,

it's so much easier. I'm still working out how to achieve this for myself

;o) I've been on the verge a few times, enough to know that's how I want to

live. Somehow your statement that " pleasure is fleeting, joy is sustaining "

was really profound, and one of the key pieces I've been looking for.

Another work in progress :o)

 

Caron

 

 

 

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On Friday 06 July 2007 13:20, Belinda wrote:

> The human race is very demanding as a whole.  

>

>

> Belinda

 

Exactly!

 

You are talking about nothing more than satisfying need. It is removing

discomfort. This is not happiness.

 

Have you never felt happy for no reason?

 

What you talk about are like clouds covering the sun. The sun still shines.

Remove the clouds (the discomforts/needs) and happiness is revealed.

 

neal.

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-

neal

>

" Do you want to be happy? Uninterrupted happiness is uncaused. True

happiness is uncaused. You cannot make me happy. You are not my

happiness. You say to the awakened person, " Why are you happy? " and

the awakened person replies, " Why not? "

 

Happiness is our natural state. Happiness is the natural state of

little children, to whom the kingdom belongs until they have been

polluted and contaminated by the stupidity of society and culture.

To acquire happiness you don't have to do anything, because happiness

cannot be acquired. Does anybody know why? Because we have it

already. How can you acquire what you already have? Then why don't

you experience it? Because you've got to drop something. You've got

to drop illusions. You don't have to add anything in order to be

happy; you've got to drop something. Life is easy, life is

delightful. It's only hard on your illusions, your ambitions, your

greed, your cravings. Do you know where these things come from?

From having identified with all kinds of labels! "

 

Anthony de Mello, SJ

===============================================

extracted chapter 24 - Obstacles to Happiness

from " Awareness "

by Anthony de Mello SJ.

 

Thanks, Neal. I see his point, but because of the way the word " happiness "

is used these days, I choose the word " contentment " . Happy is seen to be the

opposite of sad, the same as hate is the opposite of love (no, this is not

my belief, but mainstream belief). I believe, having experienced it briefly

myself, that it's possible to BE content, and at the same time, FEEL a range

of emotions, including happiness, sadness, love, hate, anger, compassion,

and so on. That's the distinction I'm trying to define for myself.

 

Caron

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-

Elchanan

>Yes, when one experiences genuine happiness, that craving for more stuff

just vanishes. This does not mean an end to all forms of desire, but rather

an end to any sense of NEEDING those things in order to be " happy " .

 

and so to distinguish between needs and wants :o)

 

Caron

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