Guest guest Posted April 9, 2003 Report Share Posted April 9, 2003 Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 9, 2003 Report Share Posted April 9, 2003 the evil question ummmm... depends on how YOU feel and such.... fer some folks, its all about how much you luv said person and the like fer others, it would be like dating a dog kicker er Hitler.. makes relationships harder if anything.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 9, 2003 Report Share Posted April 9, 2003 Hi Fraggle > fer others, it would be like dating a dog kicker er Hitler.. Yeah - but what about Eva Braun? And I believe Dave Mustaine is married. BB Peter ---Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free.Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com).Version: 6.0.467 / Virus Database: 266 - Release 01/04/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 9, 2003 Report Share Posted April 9, 2003 It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you overcome the differences. Jo - amylia fisk Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM Vegans and marriage: Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* To send an email to - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Edenvegan and WELCOME! A Vegan and non-vegan relationship is very difficult. Been married almost 7 years now and Vegan since July 2002. What a monkeywrench into the system that was! I was very lucky tho, because I got support. The hardest part to me is the smell in the house when animal products are cooking. It makes me nautious and depressed at the same time. But I look at it this way, tho I do not agree with the meals DH and DS have, I need to respect their decisions. (DS is only 4 1/2 and that is a battle in itself with veggies) I have however seen a decline in the animal products being used, they do attempt to eat my dinners from time to time or at least sample, we have replaced most of the dairy in our house to soy based products and they have been more supportive than I could have hoped fer, fer the most part. So i'm pretty lucky. I think we all have to choose our own paths in life and tho we may not always agree with what our partner wants to do, we need to respect their wishes. It's a long struggle and gives me internal struggles as well. But with any partnership decisions there must be give and take. Hopefully somewhere down the road the odds will turn more in my favor, but for now I am happy fer the somewhat open minds. Nikki , " amylia fisk " <amylia_21@h...> wrote: Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Peter! Dave Mustaine is a Vegan?? Tooo cool! Nikki , " Peter " <Snowbow@b...> wrote: > Hi Fraggle > > > fer others, it would be like dating a dog kicker er Hitler.. > > Yeah - but what about Eva Braun? And I believe Dave Mustaine is married. > > BB > Peter > > > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.467 / Virus Database: 266 - Release 01/04/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Jo! Very well put, thank you! nikki , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you overcome the differences. > > Jo > - > amylia fisk > > Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM > Vegans and marriage: > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > -- ---------- > The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi, > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > overcome the differences. Except that love isn't blind, it's based on who that person is, and them not being vegan can be a fairly large difference to try and overcome. John - " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:30 PM Re: Vegans and marriage: > Hi Jo! > > Very well put, thank you! > > nikki > > , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > overcome the differences. > > > > Jo > > - > > amylia fisk > > > > Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM > > Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > > > -- > ---------- > > The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Nikki and you must remember it is you who changed, not your partner. He is still the person you fell in love with, and will hopefully go on loving. I am 100% certain that I would not stop loving my husband if he eat meat again. I would probably have about a five-minute phase of disappointment, but that would be it. BB Jo - " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:17 PM Re: Vegans and marriage: > Hi Edenvegan and WELCOME! > > A Vegan and non-vegan relationship is very difficult. Been married > almost 7 years now and Vegan since July 2002. What a monkeywrench > into the system that was! > > I was very lucky tho, because I got support. The hardest part to me > is the smell in the house when animal products are cooking. It makes > me nautious and depressed at the same time. > > But I look at it this way, tho I do not agree with the meals DH and > DS have, I need to respect their decisions. (DS is only 4 1/2 and > that is a battle in itself with veggies) I have however seen a > decline in the animal products being used, they do attempt to eat my > dinners from time to time or at least sample, we have replaced most > of the dairy in our house to soy based products and they have been > more supportive than I could have hoped fer, fer the most part. So > i'm pretty lucky. > > I think we all have to choose our own paths in life and tho we may > not always agree with what our partner wants to do, we need to > respect their wishes. It's a long struggle and gives me internal > struggles as well. But with any partnership decisions there must be > give and take. > > Hopefully somewhere down the road the odds will turn more in my > favor, but for now I am happy fer the somewhat open minds. > > Nikki > > > , " amylia fisk " <amylia_21@h...> > wrote: > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > To send an email to - > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Then why would you even like them in the first place, let alone fall in love with them? If you have fallen in love with someone then you have already made the decision to accept them as they are and put up with the parts you don't like. Perfection is very hard to find, you know. Love doesn't ask for perfection. I think a lot of the trouble with relationships is that some people are always thinking of the faults they find in their partner rather than the faults they have themselves. How can you expect perfection in your partner, when it is more than likely that you are far from perfection yourself? Love by its very essence means acceptance not manipulation. Jo - " John Davis " <mcxg46 Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:49 PM Re: Re: Vegans and marriage: > Hi, > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > overcome the differences. > > Except that love isn't blind, it's based on who that person is, and them not > being vegan can be a fairly large difference to try and overcome. > > John > > - > " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:30 PM > Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > Hi Jo! > > > > Very well put, thank you! > > > > nikki > > > > , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > overcome the differences. > > > > > > Jo > > > - > > > amylia fisk > > > > > > Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM > > > Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > > > > > > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > > > > > > -- > > ---------- > > > The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Jo, Hmm. Well, I can only talk for myself of course, but I was married long before I became a vegan. We were both vegetarians, until someone pointed out the hypocrisy inherent in vegetarianism...I became a vegan, and she hasn't. Which leads to difficulties. Or rather, perhaps just points out that we've always thought differently on the subject but have only just noticed. Perfection? Blimey, I don't think I seek that...I hope not, anyway, as I'm certainly far from that myself (in fact I probably wouldn't live with me if I were me). I'm not sure I'd agree that the essence of love is acceptance though - maybe I'm more prosaic, but I think I'd see it more in terms of arising where the things you agree on outweigh those you disagree over. In which case a difference of opinion over veganism does affect that love to a certain extent. John - " Heartwork " <Heartwork Thursday, April 10, 2003 1:42 PM Re: Re: Vegans and marriage: > Then why would you even like them in the first place, let alone fall in love > with them? If you have fallen in love with someone then you have already > made the decision to accept them as they are and put up with the parts you > don't like. Perfection is very hard to find, you know. Love doesn't ask > for perfection. I think a lot of the trouble with relationships is that > some people are always thinking of the faults they find in their partner > rather than the faults they have themselves. How can you expect perfection > in your partner, when it is more than likely that you are far from > perfection yourself? > > Love by its very essence means acceptance not manipulation. > > Jo > - > " John Davis " <mcxg46 > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:49 PM > Re: Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > Hi, > > > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > > overcome the differences. > > > > Except that love isn't blind, it's based on who that person is, and them > not > > being vegan can be a fairly large difference to try and overcome. > > > > John > > > > - > > " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack > > > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:30 PM > > Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > > Hi Jo! > > > > > > Very well put, thank you! > > > > > > nikki > > > > > > , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > > overcome the differences. > > > > > > > > Jo > > > > - > > > > amylia fisk > > > > > > > > Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM > > > > Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > > > > > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > > > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > > > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > > > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > ---------- > > > > The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi Nikki > Dave Mustaine is a Vegan?? No - he was involved in an infamous dog kicking incident! BB Peter --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.467 / Virus Database: 266 - Release 01/04/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Hi New Kid, In terms of commitment or marriage, I couldn't be with a non vegan. I just couldn't see myself getting that close to someone who was not able to see and empathise from an animal's point of view and also practise it. What do you think about it? I've been with someone for over a year now but it is a constant dilemma for a friend of mine who's been a vegan almost 20 years. She said she's tempted to 'lower' her criteria! It's a tough one... Another friend of mine who's never tasted meat in her entire life fell head over heels with this guy and it turned out he worked in an abattoir! She told him he had to leave his job and go at least veggie or she wouldn't out with him. 3 years on they are happy as anything and have one child and one on the way. But I was totally shocked when an acquaintance, a vegan campaigner, announced over dinner that not only was his new love a meat eater but she also wears fur trim!! He has hope and is willing to wait and see if she will change. Hmmm... Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Hi John! Same as anything tho I guess. Them being a different race, religion, liking sports, not liking sports, liking different sports teams, celebrate holidays differently, different education, different type of work or work ethics, different family background, different neighborhood... ....and the beat goes on depends on the love, character and strength of the relationship nikki , " John Davis " <mcxg46@d...> wrote: > Hi, > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > overcome the differences. > > Except that love isn't blind, it's based on who that person is, and them not > being vegan can be a fairly large difference to try and overcome. > > John > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Hi Jo You are absolutely right! Thx! nikki , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > Hi Nikki > > and you must remember it is you who changed, not your partner. He is still > the person you fell in love with, and will hopefully go on loving. I am > 100% certain that I would not stop loving my husband if he eat meat again. > I would probably have about a five-minute phase of disappointment, but that > would be it. > > BB > Jo > - > " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack@m...> > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:17 PM > Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > Hi Edenvegan and WELCOME! > > > > A Vegan and non-vegan relationship is very difficult. Been married > > almost 7 years now and Vegan since July 2002. What a monkeywrench > > into the system that was! > > > > I was very lucky tho, because I got support. The hardest part to me > > is the smell in the house when animal products are cooking. It makes > > me nautious and depressed at the same time. > > > > But I look at it this way, tho I do not agree with the meals DH and > > DS have, I need to respect their decisions. (DS is only 4 1/2 and > > that is a battle in itself with veggies) I have however seen a > > decline in the animal products being used, they do attempt to eat my > > dinners from time to time or at least sample, we have replaced most > > of the dairy in our house to soy based products and they have been > > more supportive than I could have hoped fer, fer the most part. So > > i'm pretty lucky. > > > > I think we all have to choose our own paths in life and tho we may > > not always agree with what our partner wants to do, we need to > > respect their wishes. It's a long struggle and gives me internal > > struggles as well. But with any partnership decisions there must be > > give and take. > > > > Hopefully somewhere down the road the odds will turn more in my > > favor, but for now I am happy fer the somewhat open minds. > > > > Nikki > > > > > > , " amylia fisk " <amylia_21@h...> > > wrote: > > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > > > > > To send an email to - > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Well put Jo! I couldn;t have said it better meself nikki , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > Then why would you even like them in the first place, let alone fall in love > with them? If you have fallen in love with someone then you have already > made the decision to accept them as they are and put up with the parts you > don't like. Perfection is very hard to find, you know. Love doesn't ask > for perfection. I think a lot of the trouble with relationships is that > some people are always thinking of the faults they find in their partner > rather than the faults they have themselves. How can you expect perfection > in your partner, when it is more than likely that you are far from > perfection yourself? > > Love by its very essence means acceptance not manipulation. > > Jo > - > " John Davis " <mcxg46@d...> > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:49 PM > Re: Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > Hi, > > > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > > overcome the differences. > > > > Except that love isn't blind, it's based on who that person is, and them > not > > being vegan can be a fairly large difference to try and overcome. > > > > John > > > > - > > " nikki_mackovitch " <nikkimack@m...> > > > > Thursday, April 10, 2003 12:30 PM > > Re: Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > > Hi Jo! > > > > > > Very well put, thank you! > > > > > > nikki > > > > > > , " Heartwork " <Heartwork@b...> wrote: > > > > It might make you think twice, but if you really love someone you > > > overcome the differences. > > > > > > > > Jo > > > > - > > > > amylia fisk > > > > > > > > Wednesday, April 09, 2003 2:56 AM > > > > Vegans and marriage: > > > > > > > > > > > > Hey there! I'm the new kid on the block, and here's my first > > > question: what does everybody think about dating, committing to > > > and/or marrying non-vegans? (I apologize in advance if this is a > > > question many have already asked.) Thanks a bunch. > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *This message was brought to you by: Edenvegan > > > > > > > > > > > > ----------------------------- ------ > > > ---------- > > > > The new MSN 8: smart spam protection and 2 months FREE* > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Hi John I disagree - I don't think it is the cause (veganism) that affects the love, it is the result or action to the cause that affects the love I had a mixed reaction here - supportive, but a bit resentful due to the extra budget for food, the way it affects our meals, the limitations going out (not that we really do lol) etc But the main reaction was acceptance and support He has asked me not to point out the dead tortured animal on his plate and in return he does not react to the changes negatively The reaction is the key here nikki , " John Davis " <mcxg46@d...> wrote: > Hi Jo, > In > which case a difference of opinion over veganism does affect that love to a > certain extent. > > John Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Hi Peter! Ok, that I can see! nikki , " Peter " <Snowbow@b...> wrote: > Hi Nikki > > > Dave Mustaine is a Vegan?? > > No - he was involved in an infamous dog kicking incident! > > BB > Peter > > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.467 / Virus Database: 266 - Release 01/04/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2003 Report Share Posted April 12, 2003 Same as anything tho I guess. Them being a different race, religion, liking sports, not liking sports, liking different sports teams... Are those things you give as examples really the same as accepting and loving someone who continues to buy into the animal abuse industries? I take it you are are in love with someone who eats meat and doesn't plan on stopping. That must be tough. Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2003 Report Share Posted April 12, 2003 No, not the same, simply shows that there are things in the world you accept and support wether you like them or not. Doesn't mean you don't both try to work together on it, just means there will always be differences and if you ever plan on being with someone (not you in particular, just in general) you have to accept their differences. Yes, it is tough, but amazingly enough, love prevails. It did when I told him I was going to stop eating animal products. When I discussed with him that all the chemicals and cleaners, shampoos etc had to change. When I discussed with him that he could no longer use Miracle-Gro or Weed Killer. And so on So now I am to turn my back on him as he defends my choices to anyone who challenges me. You're kidding right? nikki , Saoirse Soya <saoirse_soya> wrote: > > > Same as anything tho I guess. Them being a different race, religion, > liking sports, not liking sports, liking different sports teams... Are those things you give as examples really the same as accepting and loving someone who continues to buy into the animal abuse industries? I take it you are are in love with someone who eats meat and doesn't plan on stopping. That must be tough. > > > > > Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2003 Report Share Posted April 12, 2003 So now I am to turn my back on him as he defends my choices to anyone who challenges me. That's a good start for him to gain grounding in a better belief system than his own and to start believing for himself what he's defending for you. Sounds like there's a vegan in him trying to get out! :-) Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 12, 2003 Report Share Posted April 12, 2003 Oops, that reads funny - I didn't mean turning your back is a good start. I meant his defending your choice is a good start. (BTW I also don't mean 'better belief system' in a harsh way just that your beliefs are cruelty free...) :)Saoirse Soya <saoirse_soya wrote: So now I am to turn my back on him as he defends my choices to anyone who challenges me. That's a good start for him to gain grounding in a better belief system than his own and to start believing for himself what he's defending for you. Sounds like there's a vegan in him trying to get out! :-) Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! To send an email to - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 13, 2003 Report Share Posted April 13, 2003 Hi Nikki & all > No, not the same, simply shows that there are things in the world you > accept and support wether you like them or not. I'd like to put a point of view, and expand this a little bit from straightforward romantic love, to the way we treat people in general... while I'm far from Christian, there is a phrase attributed to Jesus which I believe is highly appropriate here.... Love the Sinner, Hate the Sin. BB Peter --- Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). Version: 6.0.467 / Virus Database: 266 - Release 01/04/03 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 13, 2003 Report Share Posted April 13, 2003 Surely becoming enlightened doesn't mean being nasty to or removing yourself from the company of people who haven't become so enlightened as yourself. This would be the route to downright pomposity on all sorts of levels. Jo - Saoirse Soya Saturday, April 12, 2003 11:53 AM Re: Re: Vegans and marriage: Same as anything tho I guess. Them being a different race, religion, liking sports, not liking sports, liking different sports teams... Are those things you give as examples really the same as accepting and loving someone who continues to buy into the animal abuse industries? I take it you are are in love with someone who eats meat and doesn't plan on stopping. That must be tough. Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your desktop! To send an email to - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted April 13, 2003 Report Share Posted April 13, 2003 Well said. I wish you a lifetime of love and loving. Jo > No, not the same, simply shows that there are things in the world you > accept and support wether you like them or not. > > Doesn't mean you don't both try to work together on it, just means > there will always be differences and if you ever plan on being with > someone (not you in particular, just in general) you have to accept > their differences. > > Yes, it is tough, but amazingly enough, love prevails. > > It did when I told him I was going to stop eating animal products. > When I discussed with him that all the chemicals and cleaners, > shampoos etc had to change. When I discussed with him that he could > no longer use Miracle-Gro or Weed Killer. And so on > > So now I am to turn my back on him as he defends my choices to anyone > who challenges me. > > You're kidding right? > > nikki > > , Saoirse Soya <saoirse_soya> > wrote: > > > > > > Same as anything tho I guess. Them being a different race, > religion, > > liking sports, not liking sports, liking different sports teams... > Are those things you give as examples really the same as accepting > and loving someone who continues to buy into the animal abuse > industries? I take it you are are in love with someone who eats meat > and doesn't plan on stopping. That must be tough. > > > > > > > > > > Platinum - Watch CBS' NCAA March Madness, live on your > desktop! > > > > To send an email to - > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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