O.T. feeding the baby (sensitive child)

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 3/18/2008 8:56:34 P.M. Central Daylight Time,

elbee577 writes:

 

check out http://hsperson.com/pages/child.htm

 

 

Can't recommend the HSP books enough! They will give you tremendous insight

into your child and yourself (if you think that you, too, may be a highly

sensitive person). Until I read The Highly Sensitive Person I could never

figure out why I was so different. Now I know that I'm just wired differently

than most people.

 

TM

 

 

 

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[Guest guest]

" alia robinson " <aliar4 wrote:

>

> She thinks he is just a " needy " baby. He just loves to be

held/cuddled, and has a hard time winding down at night.>

 

I know this is OT but I wanted to share - my daughter (now 15) was

much like this, however I had NO clue and there wasn't much out there

back then, or anyone who had experienced what I was going through, so

I felt alone. Since then I've learned that she's highly sensitive

(check out http://hsperson.com/pages/child.htm), it was such a relief

to finally understand how she's wired (I only discovered this a few

years ago!). She had (still does!) a hard time winding down at night

too, but once she did, she'd sleep through the night. We had 3 1/2

months of crying every night anywhere from 1/2 hour to 5 hours, it

was draining. Wish I knew then what I know now, I was following

(well meant) advice as if it were colic (it wasn't, she was

overloaded and simply needed to vent since her immature neurological

system couldn't handle it).

*******************

 

--That perfectly describes both my older (now 26 y.o.) DD as an infant. We

heard the word,

" colic " and assumed that to be her problem, too. Crying, crying, at the top

of her little lungs, from about 9 PM until maybe 4 or 5 in the morning! She

gradually became more

and more tolerant, but DH said from the first week that our little girl had a

really sensitive

system--he noticed right away that a sudden turning on of a light, a sudden

noise or something that most people (and babies) would soon ignore, little DD

could not.

 

We found that wrapping our DD securely in a blanket ( " swaddling " , it's called)

seemed to calm her down, and DH would take her into a quiet, very dark room and

maybe rock her or walk around quietly. She loved movement--and even slept on

occasion in a " wind-up " baby swing we had. I breast fed her, but we saw several

times that she would get all " worked up " from crying that nursing just upset her

stomach and she'd barf all over me--only to eagerly go right back to nursing as

soon as she finished barfing!

 

I, too, wish I had known about the " highly sensitive person " long ago. I have

that tendency myself. I still have a lot of trouble winding down in the

evenings for a good night's sleep and wish fervently that it came easier. I

think there is a lot of overlap from this trait with other

things--the " attention deficit (hyperactivity) disorder " , which both my older

DD and I have been " diagnosed " with--who knows if it is a " real " disorder or

whether it is just a variation of

this being highly sensitive?

 

It's a lot better, however, if the parents know what they are dealing with

than that they go on the assumption (as my parents, unfortunately did) that I

was just being a " stubborn " kid and

trying to " keep awake at night " just to spite them! What a laugh--NOT!

 

I wish you the best with your little one--It doesn't hurt to cuddle a little

baby if that's what they seem to need/want. If anything, it might make him feel

more secure and able to relax if he tends to get over-stimulated and needs help

winding down to sleep. When I was a new mom and very nervous that I was going

to do something " wrong " a wise person said to me,

" listen to your instincts--and follow them. " I did, and felt much better.

Pretty soon, my " fussy " baby began to seem calmer, too. Trust your instincts!

 

Blessings to you and your baby!

--Laura B., from Illinois

 

 

 

Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Mobile. Try it now.

 

 

[Guest guest]

Personally, I think we have a whole bunch of awfully smart, helpful

moms in this group! Yea.....Moms!

Nancy C.

 

 

" alia robinson " <aliar4 wrote:

>

> She thinks he is just a " needy " baby. He just loves to be

held/cuddled, and has a hard time winding down at night.>

 

I know this is OT but I wanted to share - my daughter (now 15) was

much like this, however I had NO clue and there wasn't much out there

back then, or anyone who had experienced what I was going through, so

I felt alone. Since then I've learned that she's highly sensitive

(check out http://hsperson.com/pages/child.htm), it was such a relief

to finally understand how she's wired (I only discovered this a few

years ago!). She had (still does!) a hard time winding down at night

too, but once she did, she'd sleep through the night. We had 3 1/2

months of crying every night anywhere from 1/2 hour to 5 hours, it

was draining. Wish I knew then what I know now, I was following

(well meant) advice as if it were colic (it wasn't, she was

overloaded and simply needed to vent since her immature neurological

system couldn't handle it).

*******************

 

--That perfectly describes both my older (now 26 y.o.) DD as an infant. We

heard the word,

" colic " and assumed that to be her problem, too. Crying, crying, at the top of

her little lungs, from about 9 PM until maybe 4 or 5 in the morning! She

gradually became more

and more tolerant, but DH said from the first week that our little girl had a

really sensitive

system--he noticed right away that a sudden turning on of a light, a sudden

noise or something that most people (and babies) would soon ignore, little DD

could not.

 

We found that wrapping our DD securely in a blanket ( " swaddling " , it's called)

seemed to calm her down, and DH would take her into a quiet, very dark room and

maybe rock her or walk around quietly. She loved movement--and even slept on

occasion in a " wind-up " baby swing we had. I breast fed her, but we saw several

times that she would get all " worked up " from crying that nursing just upset her

stomach and she'd barf all over me--only to eagerly go right back to nursing as

soon as she finished barfing!

 

I, too, wish I had known about the " highly sensitive person " long ago. I have

that tendency myself. I still have a lot of trouble winding down in the evenings

for a good night's sleep and wish fervently that it came easier. I think there

is a lot of overlap from this trait with other

things--the " attention deficit (hyperactivity) disorder " , which both my older

DD and I have been " diagnosed " with--who knows if it is a " real " disorder or

whether it is just a variation of

this being highly sensitive?

 

It's a lot better, however, if the parents know what they are dealing with

than that they go on the assumption (as my parents, unfortunately did) that I

was just being a " stubborn " kid and

trying to " keep awake at night " just to spite them! What a laugh--NOT!

 

I wish you the best with your little one--It doesn't hurt to cuddle a little

baby if that's what they seem to need/want. If anything, it might make him feel

more secure and able to relax if he tends to get over-stimulated and needs help

winding down to sleep. When I was a new mom and very nervous that I was going to

do something " wrong " a wise person said to me,

" listen to your instincts--and follow them. " I did, and felt much better.

Pretty soon, my " fussy " baby began to seem calmer, too. Trust your instincts!

 

Blessings to you and your baby!

--Laura B., from Illinois

 

Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Mobile. Try it now.

 

[Guest guest]

But, you know what.....that is OK too! What a boring world it

would be if everyone were the same.

Nancy C.

 

 

 

 

check out http://hsperson.com/pages/child.htm

 

Can't recommend the HSP books enough! They will give you tremendous insight

into your child and yourself (if you think that you, too, may be a highly

sensitive person). Until I read The Highly Sensitive Person I could never

figure out why I was so different. Now I know that I'm just wired differently

than most people.

 

TM

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

I'm so glad to hear of others who know what I'm talking about! My

husband is also an HSP (except he drops off to sleep as soon as his

head hits the pillow LOL!). It's helped me understand my family SO

much better!

Jann

 

wrote:

> check out http://hsperson.com/pages/child.htm>

 

TendrMoon wrote:

> Can't recommend the HSP books enough! They will give you tremendous

insight into your child and yourself (if you think that you, too, may

be a highly sensitive person). Until I read The Highly Sensitive

Person I could never figure out why I was so different. Now I know

that I'm just wired differently than most people.TM>

[Guest guest]

" nancihank " <nancihank wrote:

> --That perfectly describes both my older (now 26 y.o.) DD as an

infant. We heard the word, " colic " and assumed that to be her

problem, too. .....We found that wrapping our DD securely in a

blanket ( " swaddling " , it's called) seemed to calm her down,..... She

loved movement--and even slept on occasion in a " wind-up " baby swing

we had.>

 

Hope I'm quoting the right person! I'd forgotten about swaddling,

that helped my DD as well. And she loved the swing, it was the only

way some nights we could sit for a few minutes and eat dinner.

 

>I think there is a lot of overlap from this trait with other

things--the " attention deficit (hyperactivity) disorder " , which both

my older DD and I have been " diagnosed " with--who knows if it is

a " real " disorder or whether it is just a variation of this being

highly sensitive?>

 

I think ADHD is over used (by schools especially, " drug them into

compliance...I won't go there! " ) I've been searching for 15 years

for answers, the other book I found that helped me understand my DD

is " Upside Down Brilliance: The Visual Spatial Learner " by Linda

Silverman - unfortunately it's out of print but maybe the library has

it, or check out the website:

 

http://visualspatial.org/

 

They tried to tell me my DD is ADHD, but I think it's more her

learning style - very right brained and visual/spatial. Many

teachers are left brained/sequential and don't understand (I won't

get into it....can you tell it's been a battle for us!). But she's

in an alternative school this year for high school (after I

homeschooled her for 7th and 8th grade) and is much happier.

 

>When I was a new mom and very nervous that I was going to do

something " wrong " a wise person said to me, " listen to your instincts-

-and follow them. " I did, and felt much better. .... Trust your

instincts!>

 

Wish I'd had this for advice instead of all the other (well meaning)

things that didn't help. I, too, learned to trust my instincts and

listen to what my child was telling me (which was a lot harder when

she was an infant, but it DOES get better, especially if you

understand their temperament). For me, I DIDN'T and the first 6

years were awful (MUCH worse than now, when many say " oh, you have a

TEENAGER? " as if to say " how horrible! " HA! They have no idea what

we went through in the beginning, as I said before, wish I knew then

what I know now, or learned a few years ago!).

 

Sorry to go on OT, just want to share what I've learned (because I

wish someone back then knew what was going on!) and hoping it helps

some!

Jann

[Guest guest]

When I first mentioned " wrapping " the babies, I did not use the term " swaddle "

because I figured that the young mothers who sneer at receiving blankets

wouldn't know what it meant.

My daughters were some of those young mothers I talked about. Both of them

scoffed until they had squalling babies that still squalled while being walked

and held. I wrapped the first grandchild in a dish towel because her mother did

not have any receiving blankets. The poor baby stopped crying almost

instantly. Then I had to teach her mother how to wrap the blanket to keep the

baby feeling secure.

With the second daughter to have a baby, it was the same thing, but I had a

real receiving blanket to use with her son.

Baby clothes are so cute now that no one wants to cover them up with a

blanket.

Katie

 

< wrote:

" nancihank " <nancihank wrote:

> --That perfectly describes both my older (now 26 y.o.) DD as an

infant. We heard the word, " colic " and assumed that to be her

problem, too. .....We found that wrapping our DD securely in a

blanket ( " swaddling " , it's called) seemed to calm her down,..... She

loved movement--and even slept on occasion in a " wind-up " baby swing

we had.>

 

Hope I'm quoting the right person! I'd forgotten about swaddling,

that helped my DD as well. And she loved the swing, it was the only

way some nights we could sit for a few minutes and eat dinner.

 

>I think there is a lot of overlap from this trait with other

things--the " attention deficit (hyperactivity) disorder " , which both

my older DD and I have been " diagnosed " with--who knows if it is

a " real " disorder or whether it is just a variation of this being

highly sensitive?>

 

I think ADHD is over used (by schools especially, " drug them into

compliance...I won't go there! " ) I've been searching for 15 years

for answers, the other book I found that helped me understand my DD

is " Upside Down Brilliance: The Visual Spatial Learner " by Linda

Silverman - unfortunately it's out of print but maybe the library has

it, or check out the website:

 

http://visualspatial.org/

 

They tried to tell me my DD is ADHD, but I think it's more her

learning style - very right brained and visual/spatial. Many

teachers are left brained/sequential and don't understand (I won't

get into it....can you tell it's been a battle for us!). But she's

in an alternative school this year for high school (after I

homeschooled her for 7th and 8th grade) and is much happier.

 

>When I was a new mom and very nervous that I was going to do

something " wrong " a wise person said to me, " listen to your instincts-

-and follow them. " I did, and felt much better. .... Trust your

instincts!>

 

Wish I'd had this for advice instead of all the other (well meaning)

things that didn't help. I, too, learned to trust my instincts and

listen to what my child was telling me (which was a lot harder when

she was an infant, but it DOES get better, especially if you

understand their temperament). For me, I DIDN'T and the first 6

years were awful (MUCH worse than now, when many say " oh, you have a

TEENAGER? " as if to say " how horrible! " HA! They have no idea what

we went through in the beginning, as I said before, wish I knew then

what I know now, or learned a few years ago!).

 

Sorry to go on OT, just want to share what I've learned (because I

wish someone back then knew what was going on!) and hoping it helps

some!

Jann

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Mobile. Try it now.

 

 

[Guest guest]

I guess I didn't know that receiving blanket had gone " out of

fashion " . I always make or buy flannel receiving blankets for

my daughters, and daughters-in-law, and then crochet edgings

on them so they look pretty. But so far, none of them has not

wanted to use them. I am in the process now of knitting a blanket

for my 20 year old's new baby, coming in May, and crocheting

edges on receiving blankets. I already have a blanket knitted for

my son and daughter-in-law's new baby...due in late June.

 

I have seen articles on swaddling in magazines in the last few

years so I didn't know it wasn't a common practice anymore

either. I just keep on trucking along just doing what I have

always done until someone stops me, I guess. I have been

having babies and rearing children since I was 18 years old...

I am 60, so that is a LONG time. And then next year...our

youngest will be going off to college. Empty nest for sure

around here.

Gotta get to bed!!

Nancy C.

 

 

When I first mentioned " wrapping " the babies, I did not use the term " swaddle "

because I figured that the young mothers who sneer at receiving blankets

wouldn't know what it meant.

My daughters were some of those young mothers I talked about. Both of them

scoffed until they had squalling babies that still squalled while being walked

and held. I wrapped the first grandchild in a dish towel because her mother did

not have any receiving blankets. The poor baby stopped crying almost instantly.

Then I had to teach her mother how to wrap the blanket to keep the baby feeling

secure.

With the second daughter to have a baby, it was the same thing, but I had a

real receiving blanket to use with her son.

Baby clothes are so cute now that no one wants to cover them up with a

blanket.

Katie

 

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[Guest guest]

I envy you more grandbabies on the way. I have 6, but probably won't get any

more for a while. The two of our kids that don't have any of their own yet

aren't likely to for a while. One isn't married and the other is being

supported by his wife while he finishes college, so they can't afford any.

Maybe in another 4 or 5 years I will get more.

Katie

 

nancihank <nancihank wrote:

 

I guess I didn't know that receiving blanket had gone " out of

fashion " . I always make or buy flannel receiving blankets for

my daughters, and daughters-in-law, and then crochet edgings

on them so they look pretty. But so far, none of them has not

wanted to use them. I am in the process now of knitting a blanket

for my 20 year old's new baby, coming in May, and crocheting

edges on receiving blankets. I already have a blanket knitted for

my son and daughter-in-law's new baby...due in late June.

 

I have seen articles on swaddling in magazines in the last few

years so I didn't know it wasn't a common practice anymore

either. I just keep on trucking along just doing what I have

always done until someone stops me, I guess. I have been

having babies and rearing children since I was 18 years old...

I am 60, so that is a LONG time. And then next year...our

youngest will be going off to college. Empty nest for sure

around here.

Gotta get to bed!!

Nancy C.

 

When I first mentioned " wrapping " the babies, I did not use the term " swaddle "

because I figured that the young mothers who sneer at receiving blankets

wouldn't know what it meant.

My daughters were some of those young mothers I talked about. Both of them

scoffed until they had squalling babies that still squalled while being walked

and held. I wrapped the first grandchild in a dish towel because her mother did

not have any receiving blankets. The poor baby stopped crying almost instantly.

Then I had to teach her mother how to wrap the blanket to keep the baby feeling

secure.

With the second daughter to have a baby, it was the same thing, but I had a real

receiving blanket to use with her son.

Baby clothes are so cute now that no one wants to cover them up with a blanket.

Katie

 

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[Guest guest]

Oh, I hope you have more soon too! Kids are such fun.

Our 24 year old daughter doesn't have children yet...she

is a graphic designer and she and her husband are trying to

get their college loans paid off first and then our youngest

daughter is still in high school, getting ready to start college

next August and our middle daughter, Sara, who is almost

20 is having one of the new grandsons in May....so I am sure

she will have more. I would really like to have another grand-

daughter before I am too old and doddering to have fun in the

kitchen with her. My oldest grandchild is a granddaughter,

20 1/2 but doesn't live close and just got married herself. And

my youngest grandchild is a granddaughter...she is one year

old but lives in Arlington. I would like a granddaughter who is

close by. I have 5 grandsons who live close but they are always

at some sports practice or involved in some sport or other.

 

Did I mention that my oldest grandson, 14 now, once told me

when he was about 7 that he was a " breadatarian " because

all he liked to eat was bread! Cracked me up! I thought

that was pretty inventive.

 

Nancy C.

 

 

I envy you more grandbabies on the way. I have 6, but probably won't get any

more for a while. The two of our kids that don't have any of their own yet

aren't likely to for a while. One isn't married and the other is being supported

by his wife while he finishes college, so they can't afford any.

Maybe in another 4 or 5 years I will get more.

Katie

 

nancihank <nancihank wrote:

 

I guess I didn't know that receiving blanket had gone " out of

fashion " . I always make or buy flannel receiving blankets for

my daughters, and daughters-in-law, and then crochet edgings

on them so they look pretty. But so far, none of them has not

wanted to use them. I am in the process now of knitting a blanket

for my 20 year old's new baby, coming in May, and crocheting

edges on receiving blankets. I already have a blanket knitted for

my son and daughter-in-law's new baby...due in late June.

 

I have seen articles on swaddling in magazines in the last few

years so I didn't know it wasn't a common practice anymore

either. I just keep on trucking along just doing what I have

always done until someone stops me, I guess. I have been

having babies and rearing children since I was 18 years old...

I am 60, so that is a LONG time. And then next year...our

youngest will be going off to college. Empty nest for sure

around here.

Gotta get to bed!!

Nancy C.

 

When I first mentioned " wrapping " the babies, I did not use the term " swaddle "

because I figured that the young mothers who sneer at receiving blankets

wouldn't know what it meant.

My daughters were some of those young mothers I talked about. Both of them

scoffed until they had squalling babies that still squalled while being walked

and held. I wrapped the first grandchild in a dish towel because her mother did

not have any receiving blankets. The poor baby stopped crying almost instantly.

Then I had to teach her mother how to wrap the blanket to keep the baby feeling

secure.

With the second daughter to have a baby, it was the same thing, but I had a

real receiving blanket to use with her son.

Baby clothes are so cute now that no one wants to cover them up with a

blanket.

Katie

 

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on

 

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.

 

[Guest guest]

Hmm.. Weird. My children are 13 and 15 and I swaddled them. It doesn't

seem so out of fashion to me...

 

It does work like a charm on a newborn. I used to call them my baby

burritos. :-)

 

Sharon

 

nancihank wrote:

> I guess I didn't know that receiving blanket had gone " out of

> fashion " . I always make or buy flannel receiving blankets for

> my daughters, and daughters-in-law, and then crochet edgings

> on them so they look pretty. But so far, none of them has not

> wanted to use them

[Guest guest]

Baby Burritos! That is SO cute! I love babies!

Nancy C.

 

 

Hmm.. Weird. My children are 13 and 15 and I swaddled them. It doesn't

seem so out of fashion to me...

 

It does work like a charm on a newborn. I used to call them my baby

burritos. :-)

 

Sharon