lisa's questions

[Guest guest]

If you have an ethical issue with a particular

food however people take a totally different point of view and are

offended that you won't eat their cooking or are unwilling to

accomodate

you. What do other people think about this?

I think for some non-vegetarians it is somewhat threatening. I

sometimes get the impression that they feel that my personal dietary

choices somehow threaten/condemn/condescend upon their own. Also,

eating with others outside of the work place usu occurs with people

we are close to. Preparing food for someone that we love is in and of

itself an act of love. Thus, I can see where mom would be hurt by not

eating certain dishes and that hurt being expressed as being

offended. (Note: I'm not this perceptive on my own. My Intro.

Sociology class had a chapter on 'The Meaning of Food'.)

In regards to why others won't accomodate us..some people just aren't

accomodating. Ya get the idea that some feel that we chose not to eat

meat and that if meat is the only thing being served then you are

just choosing not to eat this meal. I guess some people feel

like 'this is my house and this is how it is. If you don't like it,

leave'. Personally, when a guest is in my house I want them to feel

comfortable. Granted not so comfortable that I'll actually prepare

meat for them, but I've always made it quite clear to my non-veg

peeps to feel free to bring over to eat what they like and that I'm

not upset if that includes meat.

 

A wider question for the whole group, mixed vegetarian & non-

vegetarian

relationships, do people think they can work?

I think a meat-eater and non-meater can work out. I think each

person's respect for their partner plays a much larger role in

determining such a relationship's success. Any relationship between

two people is gonna have its differences and sources of stress. It is

how such is handled that matters in the end. Of course the romantic

in me believes that if they both really love one another it will work

out. All that said, I know a married couple where the wife is

vegetarian and he is just a vegetarian at home. He sometimes eats

meat when he isn't at home (thus there is never any meat in the

house). He also prefers it this way b/c he thinks its healthier not

having the fattening meats tempt him at home.

I've often wondered if I would have the level of consideration that

this couple has if I were with a meat eating companion. I personally

cannot imagine being with someone who does. Years ago, my boyfriend

and I converted to vegetarianism within about a week of one another.

So, I've never been in that kind of sitution. I guess I feel sort of

lucky in this respect. I can see where it could be quite difficult. I

don't think I could be with a 'hard-core' meat eater but prob someone

like the hubby who just eats meat away from home. But then what about

cold-cuts? They don't even put the smell of meat in your house b/c

they're not being cooked. I've felt like it was utter torture when I

was at my mother house's while her oven-fried chicken was cooking.

(This was my fav meal of hers growing up)

I find myself going well, what about this or that..and if you really

love the person, etc. Great, intriguing question Lisa!

 

No-meat Man Preferred,

Karen

[Guest guest]

>>...I've always made it quite clear to my non-veg

peeps to feel free to bring over to eat what they like

and that I'm not upset if that includes meat.<<

 

That's where I draw the line. My home is my castle, and my castle is a

meat-free zone. When I host my friends and bringing a dish is an option, I

tell everyone that meat is not to be included because I plan to supply that

portion of the meal. An interesting aside is notable here. The only ones

who have objected over the years has been my parents and my brothers and

sisters. Go figure!!

 

>>A wider question for the whole group, mixed vegetarian

& non- vegetarian relationships, do people think they

can work? <<

 

I think not!! As a veggie man, I've been married and I've been single. I

find that women are more compromising when it comes to food than most men I

know. Even the men who will not make a fuss about having a veggie meal at

my house are much less accommodating when I dine with them.

 

Since my home is a meat-free zone, I have eliminated all of the day to day

issues about having meat on the table for a less than 100% veggie companion.

When I dine out, the only veggie diet I'm concerned about maintaining is my

own.

 

With that said, I know the benefits of a veggie diet, and as I age, I'm

concerned about choosing only a companion who eats no meat. Here's why. As

a veggie, I expect a longer than usual lifespan. A woman who chooses to eat

meat is IMHO choosing a shorter than usual lifespan. Sounds very unromantic

but I don't want to be left alone in my elder years by a companion who has

made bad health choices.

 

Dave

[Guest guest]

" With that said, I know the benefits of a veggie diet, and as I age, I'm

concerned about choosing only a companion who eats no meat. Here's why. As

a veggie, I expect a longer than usual lifespan. A woman who chooses to eat

meat is IMHO choosing a shorter than usual lifespan. Sounds very unromantic

but I don't want to be left alone in my elder years by a companion who has

made bad health choices. "

 

I don't think this is unromantic at all Dave, I hear 'ya on that one. I

think it's just the opposite: very romantic. My dh is a little older than

me, and it's more typical for women to live longer than men, so I'm faced

with the possibility of having many years in old age without him. I have to

do what I can to keep him around longer. If you care for someone you want

the best for them, including their health.

[Guest guest]

I'm not sure, but I am basically of the opinion that Men and Women

are different enough already to make it difficult to get along...

throw in religion, culture, ethical, racial differences and the

challenges become heroic. Not unadvised, mind you, not impossible.

Just heroic.

-dawn