TV habits

[Guest guest]

>Michelle B wrote:

>

>There was a study done about 10 yrs ago regarding children's television habits.

Sorry I don't have the source. I heard it on NPR about 10 yrs ago, about the

time my daughter was born.

>

>I believe several hundred kids had been followed over a 15-20 yr period...

divided into 3 groups.

>Group #1 watched NO TELEVISION

>Group #2 watched only PBS - no time restrictions

>Group #3 watched unlimited television - no time restrictions, no channel

restrictions

>

>The results surprised me.

>The children who did the best both socially & academically throughout their

schooling were those in Group #2.

>Group #1 came in 2nd.. far behind in grades & performance from Group #2.

>Group #3 came in last, both academically & socially. (no surprise there!)

>

Michelle: Thanks for sharing this study!

 

I have been a bit reluctant to say anything about this subject because

my views seem to be quite different from the majority here. My dd is

almost 3 and has watched TV since she was a few months old. The ONLY

things I let her watch are PBS Kids and Noggin http://www.noggin.com/.

Neither of these has commercials. Once, I checked out Nickelodeon and

Disney, and I was shocked at the commercialism. I do not feel guilty

letting her watch educational shows. Honestly, she has learned more

from these TV shows than she ever would have from me. She is learning

to read, can recognize letters and numbers, and has learned about far

more things than I could have taught her. She was able to sing the

alphabet song before she was 2 1/2. I truly feel she has a heads up on

kids who have never watched TV, unless of course, their parents are

amazing people and spend hours a day teaching them! (And wonderful

parents they are!)

 

It may be against the grain, but I do put her in front of the TV when I

need to get something done around the house. I mean, I just can't tend

to her 24 hours a day. I do need to do the dishes, cook, and clean. I

feel confident knowing my dd is learning from the shows she watches.

She also has videos, but they are all educational. She is also learning

positive values, kindness, compassion, sharing, etc. She has surprised

us with what she's learned. Example: She learned to whisper and

tip-toe from TV. She knows the words to things that we have never

taught her.

 

Just out of curiousity, to those of you who don't allow any TV, have you

ever watched PBS Kids or Noggin? Thanks for letting me share my opinion.

 

Sheri

[Guest guest]

I can't talk for anyone else, but I know my my kids LOOOOOVE those channels. So

much so that we had the cable turned off and we're down to dvd/videos only. And

we may put the tv in storage, too. When the tv isn't around, they're happy to

play other stuff, but when it's there, it's just an issue to get into fights

over. And I don't consider myself an amazing fantastic above average parent,

just doing the best I can, but I think anyone can teach their kids as well as

television, if not better.

 

Sandra

 

Just out of curiousity, to those of you who don't allow any TV, have you

ever watched PBS Kids or Noggin? Thanks for letting me share my opinion.

 

Sheri

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

OK group, here comes the academic again.

 

Here are some websites related to children and

television. These are a great guide for parents to

help them decide how much TV their children should

watch.

 

 

http://www.cme.org/children/kids_tv/c_and_t.html

 

http://www.mediafamily.org/facts/facts_childandtv.shtml

 

http://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2001-09/cfta-tce092101.php

 

Notice in this last one that the researchers have no

way of knowing if watching many hours of educational

programing has a negative impact.

 

http://agnews.tamu.edu/dailynews/stories/CFAM/Jul2403a.htm

 

 

To comment on Sheri's email, I am glad that you are

having a good experience with TV. However, do note

that there are many shows on PBS and other stations

that are labeled " educational " which are of no value

to children and may contain violence.

 

Second, I am by no means anti-TV. However, I do feel

it, like computers and the internet, are tools that

are not used appropriately by most people.

 

Third, my child turned 2 about two weeks ago. She has

sung her ABCs for a while, can count to 16, speaks in

full, complete, understandable sentences even using

pronouns (I, me, her, his), has been recognizing a

handful of letters for some time (when she sees a B

she says baby, an M says Mama, a D says Daddy, etc),

we have taught her the capital of Ethiopia, Adisababa

(it's a family joke), and she can recognize some

specific birds (eagle, great blue heron, cardinal,

etc).

 

My child gets less than 1 hour of TV per week because

she is in daycare and my partner and I work full time.

We do get several hours a day of music (adult and

child). I don't have all the time I wish I had to work

with her on these and other skills but somehow she got

it without TV. How? We read to her, and many times she

" reads " to herself, looking at pictures and telling us

what she sees on the pages. She has even used the

pictures to help her memorize, not read, a couple of

short books. In addition, we have never used " baby

talk " with her. When she pronounces something

incorrectly, we repeat the word correctly in a

sentence and respond to her question or conversation.

We are constantly and have constantly talked to her.

When she was a baby I always felt like I was talking

to myself, for example, as I picked out produce at the

store (Let's see, we need some apples.)

 

When I need to get stuff done around the house, I do

on rare occasions plop her in front of the TV. She

watches books on DVD from the Scholastic series

(Pierre, Chrysanthemum, Pete's a Pizza, etc), Bear in

the Big Blue House, some Dr Seuss, Raffi concerts, and

some PBS shows. But we limit the time with these. On

Sesame Street days we only turn it on in time for

Elmo's World, that's 20 minutes long. She is really

good about sitting in the chair and watching the

program but after about 20 minutes, she's done. It is

time to move and do other things. But sometimes,

Elmo's world is not very good, and we are big Jim

Henson fans!

 

Most of the time when I need to get stuff done, she

finds something to do on her own. She is really into

pretend play right now. She plays with dolls, cars,

blocks, books, her " little people, " but can entertain

herself, without TV for 20 to 30 minutes at a time

without needing me or only needing me on occasion to

talk to. When she wants me to play with her and I need

to get stuff done, I make her my little helper. She

gets her own bowl or pot and spoon when we cook. She

always asks us to taste what she's stirring (pretend

play). She gets her own dust rag when it's time to

dust. She even pretends to vacuum too. And of course,

there are some days you just have to concede that

nothing is going to get done, and wait until she's

asleep to clean, read, or watch TV yourself.

 

She learned to whisper and tiptoe, not from TV, but

from us whispering to her, tiptoeing from room to room

as we picked up toys, and Kindermusik classes.

 

The key is to make learning fun and don't think that

you have to be in a structured classroom setting to

learn. You don't need flash cards; that's memorization

and should be a rare form of learning. Talk about

things as you see them. Turn a boring household chore

for you into a game for them. She and I dance while I

straighten up the house. We jump while we try to reach

something before I get a step stool out. Today, we

counted dogs on the wall paper while we waited in the

docs office. Our bird feeder is near a window we pass

by often. If there is a bird at it, we lift her to see

and tell her what bird it is. It may seem silly to us

but to them it is fun, and they are learning but don't

realize it. In addition, it is amazing the things

children, toddlers especially, pick up from us that we

don't realize we taught them. For example, until

people commented on my dd use of the word yes when

answering a question instead of ya, I didn't realize

that's my response as well.

 

TV is great for them and us to see things we may never

get to see, like lions in the safari or sharks in the

ocean. But we need to watch with them so that we can

talk about what they saw after the program is over.

 

I don't feel like I spend hours a day teaching my

child; I don't have hours a day. I feel like most days

are mundane. Most days I wish I had more time to spend

with my child and do other things I like to do. If I

wasn't working, I wouldn't want to nor could I spend

hours a day " teaching " my child.

 

That's more than my 2 cents. I am not patting myself

on the back. I don't feel that I am some super person

or over achiever. I am giving another perspective on

the whole television debate. TV is not bad or good but

as long as we make wise decisions about it, it is a

useful tool for learning and entertainment.

 

Peace to all,

 

Joann, Lon, and Quinn (2 years on 8/17) in OH

 

 

 

--- " sheri " <sheri wrote:

>

> I have been a bit reluctant to say anything about

> this subject because

> my views seem to be quite different from the

> majority here. My dd is

> almost 3 and has watched TV since she was a few

> months old. The ONLY

> things I let her watch are PBS Kids and Noggin

> http://www.noggin.com/.

> Neither of these has commercials. Once, I checked

> out Nickelodeon and

> Disney, and I was shocked at the commercialism. I

> do not feel guilty

> letting her watch educational shows. Honestly, she

> has learned more

> from these TV shows than she ever would have from

> me. She is learning

> to read, can recognize letters and numbers, and has

> learned about far

> more things than I could have taught her. She was

> able to sing the

> alphabet song before she was 2 1/2. I truly feel

> she has a heads up on

> kids who have never watched TV, unless of course,

> their parents are

> amazing people and spend hours a day teaching them!

> (And wonderful

> parents they are!)

>

> It may be against the grain, but I do put her in

> front of the TV when I

> need to get something done around the house. I

> mean, I just can't tend

> to her 24 hours a day. I do need to do the dishes,

> cook, and clean. I

> feel confident knowing my dd is learning from the

> shows she watches.

> She also has videos, but they are all educational.

> She is also learning

> positive values, kindness, compassion, sharing, etc.

> She has surprised

> us with what she's learned. Example: She learned

> to whisper and

> tip-toe from TV. She knows the words to things that

> we have never

> taught her.

>

> Just out of curiousity, to those of you who don't

> allow any TV, have you

> ever watched PBS Kids or Noggin? Thanks for letting

> me share my opinion.

>

> Sheri

>

>

>

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

This post's timing was very funny. A couple of hours later, the television

died. I think it's dead... we're not trying TOO hard to recusitate it!

 

Sandra

 

 

I can't talk for anyone else, but I know my my kids LOOOOOVE those channels.

So much so that we had the cable turned off and we're down to dvd/videos only.

And we may put the tv in storage, too.

 

 

[Guest guest]

We don't have cable. I don't want David to be a couch potato, but we're

thinking about getting it when he starts school because there are so many great

educational programs.

 

Right now he is limited to 90 minutes of television a day. We watch PBS and he

LOVES Bear in the Big Blue House and Barney.

 

Those 90 minutes give him some enjoyment and me time to make three meals a

day!!! LOL

 

Jan

mom to David who is 17 months old

>

> " Sandra Mort " <sandra.mort

> 2003/09/04 Thu AM 09:35:17 EDT

>

> Re: TV habits

>

>

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Joann,

 

What do you do? You said you work. Are you a teacher?

 

Also, have you joined any Attachment Parenting groups? It sounds like you would

fit right in.

 

Your daughter is very lucky to have you!

 

I just quit my teaching job to be a full-time mom. I went back when David was 5

months old and was MISERABLE. I had to make it through an entire school year.

I quit when the school year ended in May. I've been a WAHM since June, and I'm

LOVING IT! I hated leaving David at daycare all week long and barely seeing him

awake each night. He's still very young, so I'm looking forward to having him

help me around the house. Right now he wants momma to hold him while she

cooks...which can't be done! That's why I let him watch 3 thirty minute shows a

day. He loves anything with MUSIC! Especially Baby Einstein. I'd like to get

him down to 1 or 2 thirty minute shows a day when he's a little older and can

sit in the kitchen with me when I prepare meals.

 

ANyway, thanks for sharing!

 

Jan

>

> Joann Toth <postfem

> 2003/09/04 Thu PM 03:17:12 EDT

>

> Re: TV habits

>

>

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

I was avoiding adding my 2 cents to this discussion until Joann Toth's post.

Adisababa as a family joke? How did that happen? The same thing here!!! We

have a pet frog (inherited from a neighbor's daughter who no longer wanted

to care for it) which we renamed Adisababa, so our family and several of our

friends are well aware of Ethiopia's capital as well. We call him Adis for

short - he's an African Clawed frog, so it IS (sort of) relevant.

 

I just want to add briefly to this discussion and relate my experience. I

have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and a 6 month old son. Before the birth of my

son, I was adamantly and religiously against ANY TV viewing for my daughter.

I shuddered at others' houses when they'd turn the tube on in her presence,

as she would sometimes stand and stare at it. But when my son came along, we

had a lot of problems. The biggest was that dd would loudly and violently

oppose me nursing him. If I tried to nurse him, she would shriek at us and

demand to be nursed as well and start hitting me and him. I tried any number

of things to keep her from doing this, from special toys brought out only at

those times to songs, books, everything. My son had some serious health

problems and had a weak latch and an even weaker desire to nurse, so tandem

nursing just never worked out for him - he would latch off and just not

bother. Plus her screaming set him off as well. It got to the point that the

only way for me to nurse him was to shut me and him in a room away from her.

After doing this once or twice, I realized that it is FAR more

psychologically damaging to my daughter to shut her out of a room than to

let her watch Sesame Street while I nursed her brother. He would only nurse

about 5 minutes at a time, and she wouldn't let me turn off the tv after 5

minutes, so eventually we got to the point we are at now, which is that she

watches about 1-2 hours of TV (taped Sesame Street episodes, or Zooboomafoo,

another PBS show) most weekdays. Weekends it is not as much of an issue

because dh is home, but we still use it in the morning to keep her quiet

because she arises before 7 am and my son is a late and very very light

sleeper.

 

For me, it was easy to villify TV until the needs of a high strung,

sensitive baby became the bigger issue. To this day, my son will not fall

asleep at the breast with the background noise of his unpredictable 2 1/2

year old sister. I use TV to keep her quiet and happy for 1/2 hour while I

put him down for a nap (slings and such do not work for him.) So carefully

used TV has been a real life saver for me during this time. It has been a

real struggle for me to feel okay about this, but I made the realization

that a few hours of PBS a day during early baby/toddler hood is not the same

as a family with schoolage children whose kids have TVs in their rooms, and

who watch TV in the evening instead of reading or family games etc or during

dinner, worst of all. I do believe there is a real danger of the " slippery

slope " and I agree that not all PBS is educational or quality programming,

so care should be used if these things matter to one.

 

My dd learned her entire alphabet by age 20 mos and her 1-10 numbers with no

TV at all, but other kids learn well with TV. Some kids self entertain

better than others. There are many diff situations that may make you have to

be flexible about TV. And for lots of us, having child #2 makes you really

have to let go of some " ideals, " esp if the kids are very close in age. But

it is still my intent to have very little TV viewing in our family once the

kids are schoolage and we can engage in family activities together. My

husband and I do not watch TV anyway, so I think it can happen naturally.

 

Leena

[Guest guest]

Leena

 

What a coincidence about the Adisababa thing!

 

Here's the details about the family joke. When my

partner was about 2 or so, my father-in-law thought he

would impress his friends. So he taught him what he

thought was an obscure capital of an obscure country,

all to impress his friends. I guess to him Ethiopia

was obscure in the early 70s. When pressed that was

his reason for choosing that capital. So my

father's-in-law friend comes over and he says to Lon,

what's the capital of Ethiopia. Lon replies (phonetic

spelling here) Adeesababa. My father's-in-law friend

responds, well he's not so smart it's pronounced

Adisababa. This is where everyone laughs cause 1) my

father-in-law didn't get the pronounciation correct

and 2) that the friend would not be impressed that a 2

or so year old could actually say such a large word

and know the capital of a country. So my partner has

taught the capital to our dd. It's kind of a silly

story but our family always laughs about it.

 

I am sorry to hear that you had such a problem when

the new baby came along. We have been debating for

some time whether or not we want a second child. We

have begun considering next summer so that the kids

would be 3 years apart. I knew that the older child

sometimes has jealousy but wow I think yours is the

worst situation I have ever heard of.

 

Sometimes TV is that unwanted savior. I have had an

occasional day where the only thing that I can do to

get my dd to allow me to do something, like shower, is

to put in a video.

 

I think the main thing that all of us keep saying

because of our diets is that the problem with TV is

the commercials. I don't want her to be exposed to the

consumerism, poor eating habits, and wastefulness that

is rampant in our society.

 

My biggest pet peeve with TV, adult or child, is

having one in the bedrooms or kitchen. These are the

two rooms in the house to me that are sacred. One is

for conversation and the other for peace and

relaxation. How can anyone do either with the TV on in

those rooms?

 

I don't feel guilty about the TV we do watch on

occasion. But I can't stand when we go to my mom's or

brothers' and the TV is just on for background noise.

It is so distracting and of course we never have any

substantive conversations because we can't hear each

other talk if we wanted to. It is quite depressing.

 

 

Peace

 

Joann

 

--- leena wrote:

> I was avoiding adding my 2 cents to this discussion

> until Joann Toth's post.

> Adisababa as a family joke? How did that happen? The

> same thing here!!! We

> have a pet frog (inherited from a neighbor's

> daughter who no longer wanted

> to care for it) which we renamed Adisababa, so our

> family and several of our

> friends are well aware of Ethiopia's capital as

> well. We call him Adis for

> short - he's an African Clawed frog, so it IS (sort

> of) relevant.

>

> I just want to add briefly to this discussion and

> relate my experience. I

> have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and a 6 month old

> son. Before the birth of my

> son, I was adamantly and religiously against ANY TV

> viewing for my daughter.

> I shuddered at others' houses when they'd turn the

> tube on in her presence,

> as she would sometimes stand and stare at it. But

> when my son came along, we

> had a lot of problems. The biggest was that dd would

> loudly and violently

> oppose me nursing him. If I tried to nurse him, she

> would shriek at us and

> demand to be nursed as well and start hitting me and

> him. I tried any number

> of things to keep her from doing this, from special

> toys brought out only at

> those times to songs, books, everything. My son had

> some serious health

> problems and had a weak latch and an even weaker

> desire to nurse, so tandem

> nursing just never worked out for him - he would

> latch off and just not

> bother. Plus her screaming set him off as well. It

> got to the point that the

> only way for me to nurse him was to shut me and him

> in a room away from her.

> After doing this once or twice, I realized that it

> is FAR more

> psychologically damaging to my daughter to shut her

> out of a room than to

> let her watch Sesame Street while I nursed her

> brother. He would only nurse

> about 5 minutes at a time, and she wouldn't let me

> turn off the tv after 5

> minutes, so eventually we got to the point we are at

> now, which is that she

> watches about 1-2 hours of TV (taped Sesame Street

> episodes, or Zooboomafoo,

> another PBS show) most weekdays. Weekends it is not

> as much of an issue

> because dh is home, but we still use it in the

> morning to keep her quiet

> because she arises before 7 am and my son is a late

> and very very light

> sleeper.

>

> For me, it was easy to villify TV until the needs of

> a high strung,

> sensitive baby became the bigger issue. To this day,

> my son will not fall

> asleep at the breast with the background noise of

> his unpredictable 2 1/2

> year old sister. I use TV to keep her quiet and

> happy for 1/2 hour while I

> put him down for a nap (slings and such do not work

> for him.) So carefully

> used TV has been a real life saver for me during

> this time. It has been a

> real struggle for me to feel okay about this, but I

> made the realization

> that a few hours of PBS a day during early

> baby/toddler hood is not the same

> as a family with schoolage children whose kids have

> TVs in their rooms, and

> who watch TV in the evening instead of reading or

> family games etc or during

> dinner, worst of all. I do believe there is a real

> danger of the " slippery

> slope " and I agree that not all PBS is educational

> or quality programming,

> so care should be used if these things matter to

> one.

>

> My dd learned her entire alphabet by age 20 mos and

> her 1-10 numbers with no

> TV at all, but other kids learn well with TV. Some

> kids self entertain

> better than others. There are many diff situations

> that may make you have to

> be flexible about TV. And for lots of us, having

> child #2 makes you really

> have to let go of some " ideals, " esp if the kids are

> very close in age. But

> it is still my intent to have very little TV viewing

> in our family once the

> kids are schoolage and we can engage in family

> activities together. My

> husband and I do not watch TV anyway, so I think it

> can happen naturally.

>

> Leena

>

>

>

>