Guest guest Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? ~Shelly Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Dear Shelly, I do have some experience in this department having been divorced for five years. Firstly, it sounds as if he has a general disrespect for you and your home. If there are plans for him to see and spend time with your children it should not be in your home. He has no business there. It is his responsibility to make appropriate arrangements for visitation with the children, not yours. Once he is there, he should be treated like and behave like a guest. If he does not show appropriate respect for you and your belongings and values, he should not be invited back. Secondly, as a meat bacon is the worst of the worst. A heavy diet of bacon and sausage have been linked to pancreatic cancer which is a horrible, painfull death. It's really bad stuff. If he were feeding your child bacon under the guise of concern for her health (HA!) that is completely unsupportable. He is making choices for her, and really bad ones apparently. I can't tell you how to run your life, but he seems to be making a mockery of you on many levels. I would not let someone like that be a guest in my home, nor would I let him cook in my home and he would have to follow the letter of the law regarding visitation for the children. Here, he is using vegetarianism as a way to emotionally manipulate you and your children. The vegetarianism isn't the real issue, as important as it is (which is why it easily becomes an issue), but the real issue is power. He seems to like having power over you. Stay calm, and maintain your power over yourself and your home. Good luck. I truly hope this works out for you. It breaks my heart to think what you are facing. Savannah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 Wow! What a jerk! This is your house and you are the primary caregiver so -as a visitor he really has no say- you do have an obligation to make choices for your young children - I mean do you just let them choose to wander whereever they want? or maybe choose to swim in an ice pond? Being a vegetarian is good for them in many ways- besides the killing animal issue- the nutrition of your children is all yours - Personally I would not allow him to cook in my house - period - he eats what you cook or doesn't eat - unfortunately, if the kids are with him alone you have no control over what he feeds them- but, you might point out that soon they will not be able to digest the meat any longer and they will be very sick. what a challenging issue. You are in the right here - good luck Wendi Shelly <joychild72 wrote: I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? ~Shelly For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list and is not intended to provide personal medical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I would be angry too, but just be happy it sounds like he usually isn't a factor. I would definitely let him know that the rules in your house have to be followed if he is there though. If the kids where at his house there wouldn't be much you could do, but at yours house rules are rules. Period. -Lisa Shelly <joychild72 wrote: I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? ~Shelly For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list and is not intended to provide personal medical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 8, 2005 Report Share Posted November 8, 2005 I think that it's your house and in your house you rule. Since he is considerate of your wishes the next time he is in town he should check into a hotel with his pig meat or any other dead animals he desires to eat That's What I think ... Incidentally I was marriaged to the same type of jerk Lynda Carter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Shelly, Your ex used your vegetarianism to get at you. He meant to make it personally shocking and revolting. That was the point, to him. He sounds like somebody who needs professional therapeutic help. Protect yourself and your children from him: psychologically as well as physically. He has made it clear that he does not respect you, your boundaries, or your health. Sorry to sound so blunt, but I think this is actually what you're hoping for. I think you want -- and need -- to hear that your instincts are right on this one. Take care, Liz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Your daughter's father's argument that you are making choices for her and she should make her own is fallacious. We make decisions for our children all the time, or there'd probably be a bunch of candy- eating, tv-watching, going-to-bed-at-midnight, not-going-to-school children everywhere! You are making a decision for her that is good for her health. It sounds like you have some problems with him. It is your house. Make it your RULE not your WISH since obviously he is disrespectful. Good luck! I feel for ya! , " Shelly " <joychild72> wrote: > > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that > happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? > ~Shelly > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Shell, I know your situtation is a difficult one, but you can only do the best you can do at any given moment. I think it is unacceptable that he brought items into YOUR home that you find personally and morally offensive. That should never have happened. This is just my opinion, and I may be very wrong, and even out of line, but... In my mind, your 2 & 1/2 year old having one bite or piece of bacon (gross, yes) seems to pale in comparison to a big family fight in front of, and worse, involving the children. That kind of scene is much more damaging than the piece of bacon that she would probably forget about by the time she went to bed. I feel terrible for you and the kids that he put you in such a difficult position. It sounds like a blessing that he will be moving far away. I think that it is important that the two of you find some way to work out your differences and at least appear to be on the same page when in front of the children, at least until they are older. Of course you will continue to raise your kids vegetarian, but if they slip up or someone tricks them into eating meat, especially the baby, just try to keep your cool until an adult debate, or even screaming match, is appropriate. Afterall, you want to come off as the stronger, more adult parent. Parental anger, mixed with the horrors of factory farming and dead animals is a bit heavy for a toddler. They will unfortunately learn his parental limitations on their own, and they will always have you as their rolemodel. Man, if he had just respected your home none of that would have taken place. Shame on him. Please don't think I am coming down on you for losing your cool. You're human and the issues at hand are so emotionally charged, that its hard to keep it all inside. Nikki , " Shelly " <joychild72> wrote: > > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that > happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? > ~Shelly > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 You mentioned that you were married to the same type of jerk. How did you handle it? You can email me directly if you wish: joychild72 Thanks, Shell --- Namaska7 wrote: > I think that it's your house and in your house you > rule. > Since he is considerate of your wishes the next > time he is in town he > should check into a hotel with his pig meat or any > other dead animals he desires > to eat > That's What I think ... > Incidentally I was marriaged to the same type of > jerk > Lynda Carter > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > > > Start your day with - Make it your home page! http://www./r/hs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 I agree with you and you are absolutly right. What a confusing and upsetting incident that was for the kids. It was very inappropriate to say the least. The thing is " Daddio " doesn't respect anyone's boundaries, limits, or values if they do not match with his own. In my mind it is vitally important to make imformed choices, not ones based on " everyone else does it " . or " it is the norm. " I want the kids to learn how to find out the truth on their own. I have helped my middle one a little in showing her how to research things and about reliable sources. She is beginning to practice it a bit when doing projects for school. All I can do is guide the best I can. Long distance visitation with dad is going to be a real challenge.Thanks for your honesty Nikki, I appreciate it. ~Shell --- lilmunkydunk <lilmunkydunk wrote: > Shell, I know your situtation is a difficult one, > but you can only do > the best you can do at any given moment. I think it > is unacceptable > that he brought items into YOUR home that you find > personally and > morally offensive. That should never have happened. > This is just my > opinion, and I may be very wrong, and even out of > line, but... In my > mind, your 2 & 1/2 year old having one bite or piece > of bacon (gross, > yes) seems to pale in comparison to a big family > fight in front of, > and worse, involving the children. That kind of > scene is much more > damaging than the piece of bacon that she would > probably forget about > by the time she went to bed. I feel terrible for > you and the kids > that he put you in such a difficult position. It > sounds like a > blessing that he will be moving far away. I think > that it is > important that the two of you find some way to work > out your > differences and at least appear to be on the same > page when in front > of the children, at least until they are older. > Of course you will continue to raise your kids > vegetarian, but if > they slip up or someone tricks them into eating > meat, especially the > baby, just try to keep your cool until an adult > debate, or even > screaming match, is appropriate. Afterall, you want > to come off as > the stronger, more adult parent. Parental anger, > mixed with the > horrors of factory farming and dead animals is a bit > heavy for a > toddler. They will unfortunately learn his parental > limitations on > their own, and they will always have you as their > rolemodel. Man, if > he had just respected your home none of that would > have taken place. > Shame on him. Please don't think I am coming down > on you for losing > your cool. You're human and the issues at hand are > so emotionally > charged, that its hard to keep it all inside. > Nikki > , " Shelly " > <joychild72> wrote: > > > > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk > about something > that > > happened here tonight to other parents who may > understand. My > > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought > bacon for himself to > > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the > house and in front > > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a > few months now and > > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it > anyway, against my > > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some > and he lovingly > > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here > you go honey. " All > > the while having this snide and irritated look for > me. He gave her > > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He > made a huge > scene. > > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him > about taking > innocent > > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right > in the middle of > > the kids! He has not been an authority in our > daughter's life as he > > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a > say?! He says she > > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not > want to, that I am > > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not > also making a choice > > for her? If I would have known then what i know > now, I would have > > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not > even raising her, > in > > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days > away from here. e > > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do > you all think? > > ~Shelly > > > > > > > > > Mail - PC Magazine Editors' Choice 2005 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 you are right on the money Liz, I do wish for bluntness. I like how you worded your response. I respond well to a strong voice and wisdom, which you clearly have offered me here, thank you much. I cannot wait until he leaves the country, it is so hard having him around. ~Shell --- " E.R. Bakwin " <bakwin wrote: > Shelly, > > Your ex used your vegetarianism to get at you. He > meant to make it personally shocking and revolting. > That was the point, to him. He sounds like somebody > who needs professional therapeutic help. Protect > yourself and your children from him: > psychologically as well as physically. He has made > it clear that he does not respect you, your > boundaries, or your health. > > Sorry to sound so blunt, but I think this is > actually what you're hoping for. I think you want > -- and need -- to hear that your instincts are right > on this one. > > Take care, > > Liz > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 That is good sound advice. Thank you. I am looking for a community of other vegetarians to befriend as my children need the exposure to other people with the same values. I heard on the local radio station that a new resturant opened that has a vegetarian menu, *smiles*. I am going to go there and maybe meet some other people. It takes a whole village to raise a child. In our case, we have to create our extended family, make it a family of choice. Our community is a small mill town, so there are not many that hold " alternative " views. ~Shell --- TheNutritionNut <thenutritionnut wrote: > Honestly I don't think you should waste your breath > arguing about it with him. When she is with you feed > her vegetarian and teach her vegetarianism > principles. When he sees her he will feed her meat > and teach his prinicples. Somewhere along the way > she will decide if she will be a vegetarian or not. > It doesn't sound like it's that often anyway since > you said he lives 2 days away and rarely sees her. I > would let it go, the more he knows it irks you the > more he will do it. You can't change his behavior. > Change your reaction to his behavior and work on > teaching your daughter about vegetarianism. She's > young now but as she grows she will understand and > eventually if she agrees with your lifestyle she > will refuse meat when it's offered to her and she > won't ask for it. > > Shelly <joychild72 wrote:I am writing > this post because i wanted to talk about something > that > happened here tonight to other parents who may > understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon > for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the > house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few > months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, > against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and > he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you > go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for > me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He > made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about > taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in > the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our > daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a > say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not > want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also > making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, > I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even > raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days > away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you > all think? > ~Shelly > > > For more information about vegetarianism, please > visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for > materials especially useful for families go to > http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list > and is not intended to provide personal medical > advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a > qualified health professional. > > edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained > from a qualified health professional. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Thank you for the affirmation. Is it true that if you do not have meat for a long time you will get sick if you eat it? I have not heard of that. I hope it is true as I can use it as a reinforcer not to feed them any. My girls want to be with animals more, but we do not have a santuary here. I was thiking about volunteering at the humane society. I was hoping to find a place where they could help with rescued food animals though. Perhaps if we do move out west, there will be one there. ~Shell --- Wendi Johnson <vegforce3 wrote: > Wow! What a jerk! This is your house and you are > the primary caregiver so -as a visitor he really has > no say- you do have an obligation to make choices > for your young children - I mean do you just let > them choose to wander whereever they want? or maybe > choose to swim in an ice pond? Being a vegetarian is > good for them in many ways- besides the killing > animal issue- the nutrition of your children is all > yours - Personally I would not allow him to cook in > my house - period - he eats what you cook or doesn't > eat - unfortunately, if the kids are with him alone > you have no control over what he feeds them- but, > you might point out that soon they will not be able > to digest the meat any longer and they will be very > sick. what a challenging issue. You are in the right > here - good luck > Wendi > > Shelly <joychild72 wrote: > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk > about something that > happened here tonight to other parents who may > understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon > for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the > house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few > months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, > against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and > he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you > go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for > me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He > made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about > taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in > the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our > daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a > say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not > want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also > making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, > I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even > raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days > away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you > all think? > ~Shelly > > > For more information about vegetarianism, please > visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for > materials especially useful for families go to > http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list > and is not intended to provide personal medical > advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a > qualified health professional. > > edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained > from a qualified health professional. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 9, 2005 Report Share Posted November 9, 2005 Yes Savannah, it is about power and he does make a mockery of me. He will be gone out of the country soon, I cannot wait. I guess I shouldn't expect him to care about her health, he doesn't even care about his own. He abuses himself all the time in many ways. It is a very hard situation, and I am praying and meditating on how to best deal with a life time of having to be connected to him. I do not think that it will be good for her development to have anything to do with him as he is a very bad role model and is very irresponsible. Too bad everyone is bonded like they are, but that is my fault for allowing him back in our lives. I was naive. I see a counselor and he was the one that suggested that it is likely not in her best interest to have much exposure to him during anymore of her formative years. He says that perhaps she should decide if she wants to spend time with him when she is older. I am weighing all this out. He has some pretty powerful issues that only he can deal with. A parent can only do their best and I sure am trying. ~Shell --- Savannah Hanna <savannahcat wrote: > Dear Shelly, > > I do have some experience in this department having > been divorced for five years. > > Firstly, it sounds as if he has a general disrespect > for you and your home. If there are plans for him > to see and spend time with your children it should > not be in your home. He has no business there. It > is his responsibility to make appropriate > arrangements for visitation with the children, not > yours. Once he is there, he should be treated like > and behave like a guest. If he does not show > appropriate respect for you and your belongings and > values, he should not be invited back. > > Secondly, as a meat bacon is the worst of the worst. > A heavy diet of bacon and sausage have been linked > to pancreatic cancer which is a horrible, painfull > death. It's really bad stuff. If he were feeding > your child bacon under the guise of concern for her > health (HA!) that is completely unsupportable. He > is making choices for her, and really bad ones > apparently. > > I can't tell you how to run your life, but he seems > to be making a mockery of you on many levels. I > would not let someone like that be a guest in my > home, nor would I let him cook in my home and he > would have to follow the letter of the law regarding > visitation for the children. > > Here, he is using vegetarianism as a way to > emotionally manipulate you and your children. The > vegetarianism isn't the real issue, as important as > it is (which is why it easily becomes an issue), but > the real issue is power. He seems to like having > power over you. Stay calm, and maintain your power > over yourself and your home. Good luck. I truly > hope this works out for you. It breaks my heart to > think what you are facing. > > Savannah > > > > > [Non-text portions of this message have been > removed] > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 My husband often makes this arguement to me regarding our baby. The older ones are veg by choice. I counter with the fact that one of our jobs as parents is to keep our children as healthy as we can. We know that eating me has a direct relationship to heart disease, strokes and many types of cancer. Is that how we want to start our kids off? Cause I don't. I'd like to give them the best head start I can. when she is older she will choose what she wants. Carol Lisa <lisaviafamily wrote: Your daughter's father's argument that you are making choices for her and she should make her own is fallacious. We make decisions for our children all the time, or there'd probably be a bunch of candy- eating, tv-watching, going-to-bed-at-midnight, not-going-to-school children everywhere! You are making a decision for her that is good for her health. It sounds like you have some problems with him. It is your house. Make it your RULE not your WISH since obviously he is disrespectful. Good luck! I feel for ya! , " Shelly " <joychild72> wrote: > > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that > happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? > ~Shelly > For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list and is not intended to provide personal medical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 > He cooks it anyway, > against my > wishes. ------ Personally, I think you should smile sweetly, offer to make him dinner, and serve him a warm, steaming turd on a plate. ~DJ Correo Espacio para todos tus mensajes, antivirus y antispam ¡gratis! Regístrate ya - http://correo.espanol./ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 My Mom Gave up meat over twenty years ago. She gave up eating meat for lent. After lent she ate some meat and became very sick. She is now vegetarian for life. I think the children should be careful with going back and forth. You would hate for them to become ill when the whole point of a good diet is good health. Peace and Blessings , Lynda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 It's a possibility. I've heard a couple of people say that they've gotten very sick from accidentally ingesting meat products (like some broth in a soup), and I've known a couple of other vegetarians who've gone back to eating meat and seemed not to have a problem. The point is, it's not worth the risk and you would be right to let others know so that they don't try to give it to your children. Maria -- shelly <joychild72 Wed, 9 Nov 2005 11:58:17 -0800 (PST) >Thank you for the affirmation. Is it true that if you >do not have meat for a long time you will get sick if >you eat it? I have not heard of that. I hope it is >true as I can use it as a reinforcer not to feed them >any. >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> For more information about vegetarianism, please >> visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for >> materials especially useful for families go to >> http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list >> and is not intended to provide personal medical >> advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a >> qualified health professional. >> >> edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained >> from a qualified health professional. >> >> >> >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 10, 2005 Report Share Posted November 10, 2005 Yes, this is true. I totally agree and I think that you put it well when you said " is this the start we want for her? " I think that is a good convincing comment. ~Shell carol sobczak <cpsobczak wrote:My husband often makes this arguement to me regarding our baby. The older ones are veg by choice. I counter with the fact that one of our jobs as parents is to keep our children as healthy as we can. We know that eating me has a direct relationship to heart disease, strokes and many types of cancer. Is that how we want to start our kids off? Cause I don't. I'd like to give them the best head start I can. when she is older she will choose what she wants. Carol Lisa <lisaviafamily wrote: Your daughter's father's argument that you are making choices for her and she should make her own is fallacious. We make decisions for our children all the time, or there'd probably be a bunch of candy- eating, tv-watching, going-to-bed-at-midnight, not-going-to-school children everywhere! You are making a decision for her that is good for her health. It sounds like you have some problems with him. It is your house. Make it your RULE not your WISH since obviously he is disrespectful. Good luck! I feel for ya! , " Shelly " <joychild72> wrote: > > I am writing this post because i wanted to talk about something that > happened here tonight to other parents who may understand. My > daughter's father was here tonight. He brought bacon for himself to > cook. I asked him to please not cook that in the house and in front > of the kids. (We are new vegetarians going on a few months now and > bacon smell is their weakness.) He cooks it anyway, against my > wishes. Then our 2 1/2 yr old asked him for some and he lovingly > leans down and gives her some bacon with a " here you go honey. " All > the while having this snide and irritated look for me. He gave her > dead pig!!! I cannot believe that he did that! He made a huge scene. > My middle daughter and I were arguing with him about taking innocent > life needlessly and he just yelled louder, right in the middle of > the kids! He has not been an authority in our daughter's life as he > has been in and out of it, now he wants to have a say?! He says she > does not have to be a vegetarian if she does not want to, that I am > making choices for her. Is giving her meat not also making a choice > for her? If I would have known then what i know now, I would have > never started any of my kids on meat. He is not even raising her, in > fact he is about to go back home, which is 2 days away from here. e > is not even the one raising her, grrrr. What do you all think? > ~Shelly > For more information about vegetarianism, please visit the VRG website at http://www.vrg.org and for materials especially useful for families go to http://www.vrg.org/family.This is a discussion list and is not intended to provide personal medical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. edical advice. Medical advice should be obtained from a qualified health professional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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