Guest guest Posted March 8, 2008 Report Share Posted March 8, 2008 Hi Everyone, Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so it isn't a concern as of late. Here's my new question... I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice we do. Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to keep the subject away for a little longer. Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks, Kendrah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2008 Report Share Posted March 9, 2008 My motherly instinct says " shield her as long as possible " . It is a harsh world out there, and keeping her safe and protected is your job as a parents. But, the teacher in me says " little steps is better than a huge jump/shock " . This seems like it would be a great way to introduce her with out it becoming a huge production. You may want to save the trip to the farm until after your LLL trip, as she may begin to feel conflicted while making friends and such while there... Best of luck, and enjoy yourselves. My hubby would never agree to any of those " fun " trips Cassie Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79 wrote: Hi Everyone, Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so it isn't a concern as of late. Here's my new question... I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice we do. Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to keep the subject away for a little longer. Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks, Kendrah Never miss a thing. Make your homepage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2008 Report Share Posted March 9, 2008 Hi Kendrah, Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early, and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals? That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to understand that other people make decisions that are best for their families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house, or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person because of it. Best of luck! Lorraine On Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM LLL Conference and food Hi Everyone, Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so it isn't a concern as of late. Here's my new question... I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice we do. Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to keep the subject away for a little longer. Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks, Kendrah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2008 Report Share Posted March 9, 2008 sounds like a terrific learning opportunity to me. As you know, it's a delicate balance between providing protection and providing exposure & education about less pleasant aspects of life and our world. Here's my perspective, using " weather " - I think it's important for young children to experience wind, rain etc, that is, being outside to experience (as long as it's not hazardous - like lightning or tornadoes) the natural world and develop confidence in their coping skills and spectrum of enjoyment beyond just sunny and fair weather. I've seen lots of children (and adults) who are paralyzed by challenging circumstances, rage against storm clouds and can't " go with the flow " in so many ways. Likewise, your child sounds old enough to experience the world in age appropriate doses of reality. Otherwise, she may not develop & strengthen those " msucles " to her full potential to figure out her ( & other's) place in the world and the meaning of her (and their) actions. It's only a weekend long. Enjoy! Danita >Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79 >Mar 8, 2008 8:57 AM > > LLL Conference and food > >Hi Everyone, > >Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat >issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I >buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so >it isn't a concern as of late. > >Here's my new question... > >I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are >going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. >The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be >available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served >cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of >people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never >really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on >Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on >their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was >content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is >vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any >different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I >plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering >any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking >her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect >with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice >we do. > >Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to >shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an >chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into >any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out >here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll >have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to >keep the subject away for a little longer. > >Any thoughts appreciated. > >Thanks, >Kendrah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 9, 2008 Report Share Posted March 9, 2008 Lorraine, Your openness and honesty with your son will serve your family well throught your lives. Robin Lorraine <ldemi wrote: Hi Kendrah, Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early, and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals? That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to understand that other people make decisions that are best for their families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house, or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person because of it. Best of luck! Lorraine On Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM LLL Conference and food Hi Everyone, Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so it isn't a concern as of late. Here's my new question... I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice we do. Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to keep the subject away for a little longer. Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks, Kendrah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2008 Report Share Posted March 10, 2008 Kendrah, I agree with everything the other posters have said. My own DD was 3 before she found out some people actually kill and then even eat animals. I caution you to sit and think about your child's disposition and sensitivities. My child was so hurt and overwhelmed by this information that she literally asked me " why " every 15 minutes for weeks. She is still distraught at the idea. Waiting to tell her at the meeting would have ruined the trip for us and been just awful for her. I did something helpful for us a few years ago when DH insisted we take her to the GA Aquarium (you can see many long posts about this in the archives). I made a lapbook that focused on Beluga Whales - echolocation, the Artic, teeth vs. baleen, where they live, their social groups, and more. We drew pictures of mommas and babies, etc. We also talked about how killer whales and polar bears eat beluga whales. Then we talked about people killing them for their teeth and capturing them for zoos. (We did not discuss eating them.) This really helped her at the aquarium. She was so very upset by their captivity that she refused to look at them. But, our discussions ahead of time gave her the ability to talk to us about it - shy she was upset and how she felt. A trip to the farm may help give your child a vocabulary to discuss this with you. I'm glad that we didn't introduce DD to the concept of eating meat. She found out own her own. For awhile, while she was so very upset, I worried that we should have introduced her to the idea as a fact of life early on. But, now I am glad we didn't and wish that at 4 1/2 she still didn't know. We homeschool also but don't have any vegetarian children nearby (yet). Your child may or may not need to be informed prior to the trip. Based upon my own personal experience with my child and if I had to make this decision for us, I would first decide if I want my child to know yet. If I am okay with that, I would introduce the concept before going to the seminar. I would go to the seminar based upon how my child accepted the information. I wouldn't push her into a situation she wasn't ready to handle. Just what I would do if I had 20/20 hindsight. Carrol , danitamark wrote: > > sounds like a terrific learning opportunity to me. > > As you know, it's a delicate balance between providing protection and providing exposure & education about less pleasant aspects of life and our world. > > Here's my perspective, using " weather " - > > I think it's important for young children to experience wind, rain etc, that is, being outside to experience (as long as it's not hazardous - like lightning or tornadoes) the natural world and develop confidence in their coping skills and spectrum of enjoyment beyond just sunny and fair weather. I've seen lots of children (and adults) who are paralyzed by challenging circumstances, rage against storm clouds and can't " go with the flow " in so many ways. > > Likewise, your child sounds old enough to experience the world in age appropriate doses of reality. Otherwise, she may not develop & strengthen those " msucles " to her full potential to figure out her ( & other's) place in the world and the meaning of her (and their) actions. > > It's only a weekend long. Enjoy! > > Danita > > > >Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79 > >Mar 8, 2008 8:57 AM > > > > LLL Conference and food > > > >Hi Everyone, > > > >Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat > >issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I > >buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so > >it isn't a concern as of late. > > > >Here's my new question... > > > >I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are > >going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. > >The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be > >available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served > >cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of > >people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never > >really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on > >Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on > >their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was > >content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is > >vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any > >different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I > >plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering > >any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking > >her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect > >with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice > >we do. > > > >Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to > >shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an > >chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into > >any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out > >here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll > >have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to > >keep the subject away for a little longer. > > > >Any thoughts appreciated. > > > >Thanks, > >Kendrah > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2008 Report Share Posted March 10, 2008 * I did something helpful for us a few years ago when DH insisted we take her to the GA Aquarium (you can see many long posts about this in the archives). * wow, i haven't been here in quite a while but i totally remember that conversation. * * chandelle Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 10, 2008 Report Share Posted March 10, 2008 Hi Robin, Thank you. That is very sweet of you. I surely hope it does work that way. We just try very hard to do what feels right in our guts, what happens naturally as we go through life, and what seems to be developmentally appropriate for him that day/hour/minute. :-) (Another stream of stories I won't go into now is him asking if family members or musicians we listen to are alive still and " what died them " - ah, talk about having to pull an emotional, age/developmentally appropriate answer out of your hat at the last minute!) Have a great day, Lorraine On Behalf Of robin koloms Sunday, March 09, 2008 3:18 PM RE: LLL Conference and food Lorraine, Your openness and honesty with your son will serve your family well throught your lives. Robin Lorraine <ldemi <ldemi%40ucsd.edu> > wrote: Hi Kendrah, Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early, and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals? That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to understand that other people make decisions that are best for their families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house, or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person because of it. Best of luck! Lorraine @gro <%40> ups.com [@gro <%40> ups.com] On Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM @gro <%40> ups.com LLL Conference and food Hi Everyone, Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so it isn't a concern as of late. Here's my new question... I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun. The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice we do. Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to keep the subject away for a little longer. Any thoughts appreciated. Thanks, Kendrah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.