LLL Conference and food

[Guest guest]

My motherly instinct says " shield her as long as possible " . It is a harsh world

out there, and keeping her safe and protected is your job as a parents.

But, the teacher in me says " little steps is better than a huge jump/shock " .

This seems like it would be a great way to introduce her with out it becoming a

huge production. You may want to save the trip to the farm until after your LLL

trip, as she may begin to feel conflicted while making friends and such while

there...

Best of luck, and enjoy yourselves. My hubby would never agree to any of those

" fun " trips

Cassie

 

Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79 wrote:

Hi Everyone,

 

Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I

buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so

it isn't a concern as of late.

 

Here's my new question...

 

I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are

going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun.

The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of

people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on

Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on

their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was

content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is

vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I

plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering

any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking

her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice

we do.

 

Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to

shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into

any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out

here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll

have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to

keep the subject away for a little longer.

 

Any thoughts appreciated.

 

Thanks,

Kendrah

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never miss a thing. Make your homepage.

 

 

[Guest guest]

Hi Kendrah,

Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat

meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading

labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended

families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early,

and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat

and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have

occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals?

That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're

glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of

Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to

understand that other people make decisions that are best for their

families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all

different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the

conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house,

or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the

stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that

organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess

sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in

life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL

conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come

up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm

sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person

because of it.

Best of luck!

Lorraine

 

 

On

Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen

Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM

 

LLL Conference and food

 

Hi Everyone,

 

Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I

buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so

it isn't a concern as of late.

 

Here's my new question...

 

I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are

going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun.

The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of

people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on

Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on

their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was

content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is

vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I

plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering

any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking

her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice

we do.

 

Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to

shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into

any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out

here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll

have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to

keep the subject away for a little longer.

 

Any thoughts appreciated.

 

Thanks,

Kendrah

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

sounds like a terrific learning opportunity to me.

 

As you know, it's a delicate balance between providing protection and providing

exposure & education about less pleasant aspects of life and our world.

 

Here's my perspective, using " weather " -

 

I think it's important for young children to experience wind, rain etc, that is,

being outside to experience (as long as it's not hazardous - like lightning or

tornadoes) the natural world and develop confidence in their coping skills and

spectrum of enjoyment beyond just sunny and fair weather. I've seen lots of

children (and adults) who are paralyzed by challenging circumstances, rage

against storm clouds and can't " go with the flow " in so many ways.

 

Likewise, your child sounds old enough to experience the world in age

appropriate doses of reality. Otherwise, she may not develop & strengthen those

" msucles " to her full potential to figure out her ( & other's) place in the world

and the meaning of her (and their) actions.

 

It's only a weekend long. Enjoy!

 

Danita

 

 

>Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79

>Mar 8, 2008 8:57 AM

>

> LLL Conference and food

>

>Hi Everyone,

>

>Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

>issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I

>buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so

>it isn't a concern as of late.

>

>Here's my new question...

>

>I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are

>going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun.

>The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

>available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

>cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of

>people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

>really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on

>Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on

>their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was

>content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is

>vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

>different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I

>plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering

>any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking

>her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

>with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice

>we do.

>

>Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to

>shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

>chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into

>any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out

>here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll

>have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to

>keep the subject away for a little longer.

>

>Any thoughts appreciated.

>

>Thanks,

>Kendrah

[Guest guest]

Lorraine,

 

Your openness and honesty with your son will serve your family well throught

your lives.

 

Robin

 

Lorraine <ldemi wrote:

Hi Kendrah,

Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat

meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading

labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended

families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early,

and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat

and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have

occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals?

That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're

glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of

Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to

understand that other people make decisions that are best for their

families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all

different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the

conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house,

or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the

stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that

organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess

sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in

life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL

conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come

up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm

sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person

because of it.

Best of luck!

Lorraine

 

 

On

Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen

Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM

 

LLL Conference and food

 

Hi Everyone,

 

Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I

buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so

it isn't a concern as of late.

 

Here's my new question...

 

I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are

going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun.

The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of

people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on

Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on

their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was

content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is

vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I

plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering

any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking

her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice

we do.

 

Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to

shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into

any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out

here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll

have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to

keep the subject away for a little longer.

 

Any thoughts appreciated.

 

Thanks,

Kendrah

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Kendrah,

I agree with everything the other posters have said. My own DD was 3

before she found out some people actually kill and then even eat

animals. I caution you to sit and think about your child's

disposition and sensitivities. My child was so hurt and overwhelmed

by this information that she literally asked me " why " every 15

minutes for weeks. She is still distraught at the idea. Waiting to

tell her at the meeting would have ruined the trip for us and been

just awful for her.

 

I did something helpful for us a few years ago when DH insisted we

take her to the GA Aquarium (you can see many long posts about this

in the archives). I made a lapbook that focused on Beluga Whales -

echolocation, the Artic, teeth vs. baleen, where they live, their

social groups, and more. We drew pictures of mommas and babies, etc.

We also talked about how killer whales and polar bears eat beluga

whales. Then we talked about people killing them for their teeth and

capturing them for zoos. (We did not discuss eating them.) This

really helped her at the aquarium. She was so very upset by their

captivity that she refused to look at them. But, our discussions

ahead of time gave her the ability to talk to us about it - shy she

was upset and how she felt. A trip to the farm may help give your

child a vocabulary to discuss this with you.

 

I'm glad that we didn't introduce DD to the concept of eating meat.

She found out own her own. For awhile, while she was so very upset, I

worried that we should have introduced her to the idea as a fact of

life early on. But, now I am glad we didn't and wish that at 4 1/2

she still didn't know. We homeschool also but don't have any

vegetarian children nearby (yet).

 

Your child may or may not need to be informed prior to the trip.

Based upon my own personal experience with my child and if I had to

make this decision for us, I would first decide if I want my child to

know yet. If I am okay with that, I would introduce the concept

before going to the seminar. I would go to the seminar based upon how

my child accepted the information. I wouldn't push her into a

situation she wasn't ready to handle. Just what I would do if I had

20/20 hindsight.

 

Carrol

 

, danitamark wrote:

>

> sounds like a terrific learning opportunity to me.

>

> As you know, it's a delicate balance between providing protection

and providing exposure & education about less pleasant aspects of

life and our world.

>

> Here's my perspective, using " weather " -

>

> I think it's important for young children to experience wind, rain

etc, that is, being outside to experience (as long as it's not

hazardous - like lightning or tornadoes) the natural world and

develop confidence in their coping skills and spectrum of enjoyment

beyond just sunny and fair weather. I've seen lots of children (and

adults) who are paralyzed by challenging circumstances, rage against

storm clouds and can't " go with the flow " in so many ways.

>

> Likewise, your child sounds old enough to experience the world in

age appropriate doses of reality. Otherwise, she may not develop &

strengthen those " msucles " to her full potential to figure out her ( &

other's) place in the world and the meaning of her (and their)

actions.

>

> It's only a weekend long. Enjoy!

>

> Danita

>

>

> >Kendrah Nilsestuen <carebear-79

> >Mar 8, 2008 8:57 AM

> >

> > LLL Conference and food

> >

> >Hi Everyone,

> >

> >Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

> >issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it.

I

> >buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now,

so

> >it isn't a concern as of late.

> >

> >Here's my new question...

> >

> >I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We

are

> >going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of

fun.

> >The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

> >available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

> >cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots

of

> >people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

> >really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey

on

> >Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was

on

> >their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and

was

> >content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world

is

> >vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

> >different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it

I

> >plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part.

Answering

> >any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of

taking

> >her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

> >with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the

choice

> >we do.

> >

> >Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue

to

> >shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

> >chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going

into

> >any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community

out

> >here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if

I'll

> >have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to,

to

> >keep the subject away for a little longer.

> >

> >Any thoughts appreciated.

> >

> >Thanks,

> >Kendrah

>

[Guest guest]

* I did something helpful for us a few years ago when DH insisted we

take her to the GA Aquarium (you can see many long posts about this

in the archives).

*

wow, i haven't been here in quite a while but i totally remember that

conversation. *

*

chandelle

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Hi Robin,

Thank you. That is very sweet of you. I surely hope it does work that

way. We just try very hard to do what feels right in our guts, what

happens naturally as we go through life, and what seems to be

developmentally appropriate for him that day/hour/minute. :-) (Another

stream of stories I won't go into now is him asking if family members or

musicians we listen to are alive still and " what died them " - ah, talk

about having to pull an emotional, age/developmentally appropriate

answer out of your hat at the last minute!)

Have a great day,

Lorraine

 

 

On

Behalf Of robin koloms

Sunday, March 09, 2008 3:18 PM

 

RE: LLL Conference and food

 

Lorraine,

 

Your openness and honesty with your son will serve your family well

throught your lives.

 

Robin

 

Lorraine <ldemi <ldemi%40ucsd.edu> > wrote:

Hi Kendrah,

Our son is not quite 3-1/2 and we've always told him that we don't eat

meat because we love animals so much and he's always seen us reading

labels and asking about food ingredients in restaurants. Our extended

families and many of our friends eat meat, so it had to come up early,

and often, and we've always had to be careful since this dish has meat

and that one doesn't. He seems totally fine with it. We have

occasional questions to deal with like: " Why does Auntie eat animals?

That's not very nice. " And whereas it's kind of funny to us, and we're

glad he asks these questions, it's not so convenient in the middle of

Thanksgiving dinner. :-) But, at the age he is, he's also starting to

understand that other people make decisions that are best for their

families, and we make the decisions best for our family, and we're all

different. And he seems okay with that. It's sort of the same as the

conversations we have about why we don't have weapon toys in our house,

or why we recycle, or why we buy organic foods, or whatever the

stream-of-questions-of-the-day are. :-) Now he'll ask, " is that

organic? Is it vegetarian? Is it no animal ingredients? " I guess

sometimes I wish we shielded him a bit more, but these things came up in

life for us, so we talked about them as they came up. I think the LLL

conference is the time that these things might (or might not, even) come

up for your family - and that's okay. It'll come up some day, and I'm

sure you'll handle it very nicely and I'm sure she'll grow as a person

because of it.

Best of luck!

Lorraine

 

 

@gro <%40> ups.com

[@gro <%40>

ups.com] On

Behalf Of Kendrah Nilsestuen

Saturday, March 08, 2008 7:58 AM

@gro <%40> ups.com

LLL Conference and food

 

Hi Everyone,

 

Thanks so much for all the help you gave me with the buying meat

issue for my parents. We've all come to a peaceful place with it. I

buy them what they request. My dad is able to do the shopping now, so

it isn't a concern as of late.

 

Here's my new question...

 

I've signed my family and I up for a weekend LLL conference. We are

going with another family (not veg) and it sounds like a lot of fun.

The price is reasonable. They told me that vegan food would be

available at the hotel for our meals. It is going to be served

cafeteria style, with meat also being an option. And probably lots of

people in one area eating it. My 4 (almost 5) year old has never

really been exposed to many meat eaters. My parents had a turkey on

Thanksgiving and they separated out the table so their food was on

their side of the table. My daughter didn't seem to notice, and was

content with what we had on our side. She thinks that the world is

vegan. We have a lot of vegan friends and she doesn't know any

different. At the hotel she will though. If she inquires about it I

plan to say that our family doesn't eat animals, any part. Answering

any questions she may have age appropriately. I thought of taking

her to a farm sanctuary before the trip so she can really connect

with the animals, and understand why my husband and I make the choice

we do.

 

Part of me wonders if we should even go though. Should I continue to

shield her from it as long as possible? Or should I use it as an

chance to let her see why we feel the way we do (without going into

any gory details)? We have a wonderful home-schooling community out

here, many of which are vegetarian families, so it isn't as if I'll

have the school issue looming overhead. I have time if I chose to, to

keep the subject away for a little longer.

 

Any thoughts appreciated.

 

Thanks,

Kendrah

 

 

[Guest guest]

Thanks everyone for the advice on this. We've decided to go to the

conference. Being a veg family is some of who we are, not all of it.

Laughter and connection with friends at an LLL conference is equally

important. I'm not even sure it will be an issue. I think if my dd

asks about it I will say something like " Every family eats

differently, we choose not to eat those foods because we think that

is what's best for us. " Or something to that effect. This way I'm not

giving judgement to the other families (some of which are our

friends) for what they eat, but I'm clarifying for her the position

within our family.

 

Thanks again,

Kendrah:)