Guest guest Posted May 19, 2008 Report Share Posted May 19, 2008 My daughter will fight the diaper, fight the training pants, uses the potty some times. I am going to go get " big girl panties " this evening and do the diapers at night. She will be 2 on June 1, so I have some time, yet I feel things are not going right. Cassie ad00rable_1 <nkiffer wrote: I agree w/ the going w/o bottoms. We started out doing that and as soon as we tried to have her start wearing pants (comfy pants as we call them...any easy to pull up and down elastic waist pants) it threw everything for a loop. It took a while before she was back on track. I agree with other comments that every child is different in their learning to use the potty. I'm extremely intrigued by the EC approach now. I have a friend with 4 children who took that approach and they had all learned well before they were 2. She has two boys and two girls. I didn't learn about that route until my little one was almost two. If we have another I think I'll give it a shot. My approach...I just took in all the info I was getting from people and books, and came up with what I felt comfortable doing (mind you nothing was super comfortable, honestly I was more nervous about potty learning than anything else I've done so far as a parent). Two books I purchased that had some good advice were " Potty Free before 3 " and " The No-Cry Potty Training Solution " . -Nancy , chandelle' <earthmother213 wrote: > > i think nakedness is one of the best things for being able to use the > potty. for a year, from about 18 months to 2 1/2-3, my son would use the > potty 100% of the time, for pee and poop, if he was naked. > > chandelle > > On Sun, May 18, 2008 at 6:48 PM, Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet > wrote: > > > We have been allowing Lily to run around the house w/o bottoms so that > > she is able to get to the potty. I was packing some things (we move in 28 > > days!) and she was walking on the bubble wrap. She started looking > > frantically for the potty and kept repeating " Potty chair, potty chair " . She > > ran over and sat. Just as she was sitting, a little squirt of poo slid down > > the side of the chair, but everything else made it in! LOL > > About 15 minutes later, my husband was telling my mother in law the story, > > and Lily ran into the kitchen and didn't even look for the potty chair. She > > squatted on the kitchen floor and more smooshy poo came out. Like, she heard > > and understood what they wer talking about and wanted to show her, too! LOL > > > > It was super gross and cute at the same time > > Cassie > > > > Missie Ward <mszzzi <mszzzi%40gmail.com>> wrote: My son is in > > the latter 10% that was not. He's nearly 5 now (next month) and > > he's finally (hopefully) gotten through all this. > > > > It's a long story, and we never started until he was asking us about it - > > which was at 18 mo's and then we were on a car trip to help my grandma move > > and sell her house after my grandpa died, and the auto-flush toilets took > > care of that for about a year or so before we could even mention it again. > > It had since been on again/off again and for nearly a year, but the last 4 > > weeks, after a chat and a doc visit (we suspected possibly he had > > encopresis, but turns out he was and is just headstrong and strong willed. > > The visit took out the butting heads with us on having him use the potty, > > as > > it was 'Doctor's orders' that he sit 30min's after every meal, not our > > decision or rules). Worked fine. > > > > In the begining before we were sabbotaged by the auto-flush we did go from > > cloth to undies, but we used the vinyl ones that were lined, and I also > > found a pattern online for sewing fleece ones that looked like shorts, and > > you just laid the cloth diaper in there. I also knit some pull up type > > covers for them, from acrylic which worked fine despite what you can find > > online for the most part (I did find some places folks said acrylic worked > > for them and I had some, and tried it, and they did work, but not entirely > > for overnights if it was a heavy wetting night). We switched to whatever > > diapers that whole foods had that were unbleached and I think biodegradable > > for overnights or our son would never sleep through the night. > > He still has issues overnight, but is completely fine during the day. > > If you have any questions on how to start, we used the dr. sears site (I > > think it's www.askdrsears.com) they have a checklist to be sure your child > > is ready first, and some helpful things on starting and what not, even for > > the reluctant child...of course our case was in the minority, and > > circumstances were off for us, but I know what we got from there worked > > very > > well when he was in a positive/receptive mood for it. He's different now, > > so > > none of the info we had would work for him since he was a much later > > 'bloomer'. > > > > If you have any questions, you can also ask me, as I think we did it ALL, > > but the headstrong child had his own agenda back then. LOL. It's funny now, > > but like someone else mentioned, it is a very frustrating process. If it's > > nto working, put it away for a month or so, until they're receptive to the > > idea again and try then. :)Just be sure they're ready to start, and be sure > > you're ready for it too, as accidents do, and will happen when you start > > (some have children that take to it easier than others). > > > > Good luck, and I hope it goes fast for you! > > Missie > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 2:32 PM, chandelle' <earthmother213<earthmother213%40gmail.com> > > > > > wrote: > > > > > being potty " trained " generally only refers to day time dryness. 80% - > > > 90% > > > of kids are dry all day by 4. night dryness is generally not considered > > > something that can be taught or learned. it comes with physiological > > > development. my son still gets a diaper at night and he will until his > > body > > > is ready to hold urine all night. but he's dry all day, which is what > > > " potty trained " really means, clinically. > > > > > > chandelle > > > > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM, <danitamark<danitamark%40earthlink.net> > > <danitamark%40earthlink.net>> > > > wrote: > > > > > > > for future reference since a large portion of kids struggle with night > > > > time dryness even after being " trained " > > > > > > > > I highly reccommend > > > > > > > > Dry All Night: The Picture Book Technique That Stops Bedwetting by > > Alison > > > > Mack > > > > > > > > I think it's out of print but you can find it online. > > > > > > > > there's a section for kids to read and a sectio for parents to read. > > > great > > > > images for kids to process before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > > D > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > " if voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal. " > > > > > > ~emma goldman > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2008 Report Share Posted May 19, 2008 I'm the last person to offer advice on this one but I'm going to chime in on 'what not to do.' As my daughter was nearly 4 when she was finally potty trainned. I had heard that you should wait to potty train until they are at least 2 years old. But I wanted her potty trained by 2. We started at 19 months. She did very well in the beginning and by the time she turned two she was pretty much potty trained and always sat on the potty during the day when she was awake. Somewhere around the time she turned 3 (went from nearly completely potty trainned except for nights and occasional accidents during the day) she just decided she didn't want to use the potty anymore and absolutely refused to go at all. The novelty of it had worn off and it took another close to a year before she was finally potty trainned. It had become a power struggle and I think she was acting out. In retrospect I think I had started her too early. Renee Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet wrote: My daughter will fight the diaper, fight the training pants, uses the potty some times. I am going to go get " big girl panties " this evening and do the diapers at night. She will be 2 on June 1, so I have some time, yet I feel things are not going right. Cassie ad00rable_1 <nkiffer wrote: I agree w/ the going w/o bottoms. We started out doing that and as soon as we tried to have her start wearing pants (comfy pants as we call them...any easy to pull up and down elastic waist pants) it threw everything for a loop. It took a while before she was back on track. I agree with other comments that every child is different in their learning to use the potty. I'm extremely intrigued by the EC approach now. I have a friend with 4 children who took that approach and they had all learned well before they were 2. She has two boys and two girls. I didn't learn about that route until my little one was almost two. If we have another I think I'll give it a shot. My approach...I just took in all the info I was getting from people and books, and came up with what I felt comfortable doing (mind you nothing was super comfortable, honestly I was more nervous about potty learning than anything else I've done so far as a parent). Two books I purchased that had some good advice were " Potty Free before 3 " and " The No-Cry Potty Training Solution " . -Nancy , chandelle' <earthmother213 wrote: > > i think nakedness is one of the best things for being able to use the > potty. for a year, from about 18 months to 2 1/2-3, my son would use the > potty 100% of the time, for pee and poop, if he was naked. > > chandelle > > On Sun, May 18, 2008 at 6:48 PM, Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet > wrote: > > > We have been allowing Lily to run around the house w/o bottoms so that > > she is able to get to the potty. I was packing some things (we move in 28 > > days!) and she was walking on the bubble wrap. She started looking > > frantically for the potty and kept repeating " Potty chair, potty chair " . She > > ran over and sat. Just as she was sitting, a little squirt of poo slid down > > the side of the chair, but everything else made it in! LOL > > About 15 minutes later, my husband was telling my mother in law the story, > > and Lily ran into the kitchen and didn't even look for the potty chair. She > > squatted on the kitchen floor and more smooshy poo came out. Like, she heard > > and understood what they wer talking about and wanted to show her, too! LOL > > > > It was super gross and cute at the same time > > Cassie > > > > Missie Ward <mszzzi <mszzzi%40gmail.com>> wrote: My son is in > > the latter 10% that was not. He's nearly 5 now (next month) and > > he's finally (hopefully) gotten through all this. > > > > It's a long story, and we never started until he was asking us about it - > > which was at 18 mo's and then we were on a car trip to help my grandma move > > and sell her house after my grandpa died, and the auto-flush toilets took > > care of that for about a year or so before we could even mention it again. > > It had since been on again/off again and for nearly a year, but the last 4 > > weeks, after a chat and a doc visit (we suspected possibly he had > > encopresis, but turns out he was and is just headstrong and strong willed. > > The visit took out the butting heads with us on having him use the potty, > > as > > it was 'Doctor's orders' that he sit 30min's after every meal, not our > > decision or rules). Worked fine. > > > > In the begining before we were sabbotaged by the auto-flush we did go from > > cloth to undies, but we used the vinyl ones that were lined, and I also > > found a pattern online for sewing fleece ones that looked like shorts, and > > you just laid the cloth diaper in there. I also knit some pull up type > > covers for them, from acrylic which worked fine despite what you can find > > online for the most part (I did find some places folks said acrylic worked > > for them and I had some, and tried it, and they did work, but not entirely > > for overnights if it was a heavy wetting night). We switched to whatever > > diapers that whole foods had that were unbleached and I think biodegradable > > for overnights or our son would never sleep through the night. > > He still has issues overnight, but is completely fine during the day. > > If you have any questions on how to start, we used the dr. sears site (I > > think it's www.askdrsears.com) they have a checklist to be sure your child > > is ready first, and some helpful things on starting and what not, even for > > the reluctant child...of course our case was in the minority, and > > circumstances were off for us, but I know what we got from there worked > > very > > well when he was in a positive/receptive mood for it. He's different now, > > so > > none of the info we had would work for him since he was a much later > > 'bloomer'. > > > > If you have any questions, you can also ask me, as I think we did it ALL, > > but the headstrong child had his own agenda back then. LOL. It's funny now, > > but like someone else mentioned, it is a very frustrating process. If it's > > nto working, put it away for a month or so, until they're receptive to the > > idea again and try then. :)Just be sure they're ready to start, and be sure > > you're ready for it too, as accidents do, and will happen when you start > > (some have children that take to it easier than others). > > > > Good luck, and I hope it goes fast for you! > > Missie > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 2:32 PM, chandelle' <earthmother213<earthmother213%40gmail.com> > > > > > wrote: > > > > > being potty " trained " generally only refers to day time dryness. 80% - > > > 90% > > > of kids are dry all day by 4. night dryness is generally not considered > > > something that can be taught or learned. it comes with physiological > > > development. my son still gets a diaper at night and he will until his > > body > > > is ready to hold urine all night. but he's dry all day, which is what > > > " potty trained " really means, clinically. > > > > > > chandelle > > > > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM, <danitamark<danitamark%40earthlink.net> > > <danitamark%40earthlink.net>> > > > wrote: > > > > > > > for future reference since a large portion of kids struggle with night > > > > time dryness even after being " trained " > > > > > > > > I highly reccommend > > > > > > > > Dry All Night: The Picture Book Technique That Stops Bedwetting by > > Alison > > > > Mack > > > > > > > > I think it's out of print but you can find it online. > > > > > > > > there's a section for kids to read and a sectio for parents to read. > > > great > > > > images for kids to process before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > > D > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > " if voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal. " > > > > > > ~emma goldman > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2008 Report Share Posted May 19, 2008 We had exactly the same experience. Our doctor said: " Oh, she is so smart, you should start potty training at eighteen months " ; my husband was thrilled and I was horrified. We gave up after many miserable months. Right around her fourth birthday, Alyssa announced that she was finished with diapers, and she was. Renee Carroll <renecarol25 wrote: I'm the last person to offer advice on this one but I'm going to chime in on 'what not to do.' As my daughter was nearly 4 when she was finally potty trainned. I had heard that you should wait to potty train until they are at least 2 years old. But I wanted her potty trained by 2. We started at 19 months. She did very well in the beginning and by the time she turned two she was pretty much potty trained and always sat on the potty during the day when she was awake. Somewhere around the time she turned 3 (went from nearly completely potty trainned except for nights and occasional accidents during the day) she just decided she didn't want to use the potty anymore and absolutely refused to go at all. The novelty of it had worn off and it took another close to a year before she was finally potty trainned. It had become a power struggle and I think she was acting out. In retrospect I think I had started her too early. Renee Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet wrote: My daughter will fight the diaper, fight the training pants, uses the potty some times. I am going to go get " big girl panties " this evening and do the diapers at night. She will be 2 on June 1, so I have some time, yet I feel things are not going right. Cassie ad00rable_1 <nkiffer wrote: I agree w/ the going w/o bottoms. We started out doing that and as soon as we tried to have her start wearing pants (comfy pants as we call them...any easy to pull up and down elastic waist pants) it threw everything for a loop. It took a while before she was back on track. I agree with other comments that every child is different in their learning to use the potty. I'm extremely intrigued by the EC approach now. I have a friend with 4 children who took that approach and they had all learned well before they were 2. She has two boys and two girls. I didn't learn about that route until my little one was almost two. If we have another I think I'll give it a shot. My approach...I just took in all the info I was getting from people and books, and came up with what I felt comfortable doing (mind you nothing was super comfortable, honestly I was more nervous about potty learning than anything else I've done so far as a parent). Two books I purchased that had some good advice were " Potty Free before 3 " and " The No-Cry Potty Training Solution " . -Nancy , chandelle' <earthmother213 wrote: > > i think nakedness is one of the best things for being able to use the > potty. for a year, from about 18 months to 2 1/2-3, my son would use the > potty 100% of the time, for pee and poop, if he was naked. > > chandelle > > On Sun, May 18, 2008 at 6:48 PM, Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet > wrote: > > > We have been allowing Lily to run around the house w/o bottoms so that > > she is able to get to the potty. I was packing some things (we move in 28 > > days!) and she was walking on the bubble wrap. She started looking > > frantically for the potty and kept repeating " Potty chair, potty chair " . She > > ran over and sat. Just as she was sitting, a little squirt of poo slid down > > the side of the chair, but everything else made it in! LOL > > About 15 minutes later, my husband was telling my mother in law the story, > > and Lily ran into the kitchen and didn't even look for the potty chair. She > > squatted on the kitchen floor and more smooshy poo came out. Like, she heard > > and understood what they wer talking about and wanted to show her, too! LOL > > > > It was super gross and cute at the same time > > Cassie > > > > Missie Ward <mszzzi <mszzzi%40gmail.com>> wrote: My son is in > > the latter 10% that was not. He's nearly 5 now (next month) and > > he's finally (hopefully) gotten through all this. > > > > It's a long story, and we never started until he was asking us about it - > > which was at 18 mo's and then we were on a car trip to help my grandma move > > and sell her house after my grandpa died, and the auto-flush toilets took > > care of that for about a year or so before we could even mention it again. > > It had since been on again/off again and for nearly a year, but the last 4 > > weeks, after a chat and a doc visit (we suspected possibly he had > > encopresis, but turns out he was and is just headstrong and strong willed. > > The visit took out the butting heads with us on having him use the potty, > > as > > it was 'Doctor's orders' that he sit 30min's after every meal, not our > > decision or rules). Worked fine. > > > > In the begining before we were sabbotaged by the auto-flush we did go from > > cloth to undies, but we used the vinyl ones that were lined, and I also > > found a pattern online for sewing fleece ones that looked like shorts, and > > you just laid the cloth diaper in there. I also knit some pull up type > > covers for them, from acrylic which worked fine despite what you can find > > online for the most part (I did find some places folks said acrylic worked > > for them and I had some, and tried it, and they did work, but not entirely > > for overnights if it was a heavy wetting night). We switched to whatever > > diapers that whole foods had that were unbleached and I think biodegradable > > for overnights or our son would never sleep through the night. > > He still has issues overnight, but is completely fine during the day. > > If you have any questions on how to start, we used the dr. sears site (I > > think it's www.askdrsears.com) they have a checklist to be sure your child > > is ready first, and some helpful things on starting and what not, even for > > the reluctant child...of course our case was in the minority, and > > circumstances were off for us, but I know what we got from there worked > > very > > well when he was in a positive/receptive mood for it. He's different now, > > so > > none of the info we had would work for him since he was a much later > > 'bloomer'. > > > > If you have any questions, you can also ask me, as I think we did it ALL, > > but the headstrong child had his own agenda back then. LOL. It's funny now, > > but like someone else mentioned, it is a very frustrating process. If it's > > nto working, put it away for a month or so, until they're receptive to the > > idea again and try then. :)Just be sure they're ready to start, and be sure > > you're ready for it too, as accidents do, and will happen when you start > > (some have children that take to it easier than others). > > > > Good luck, and I hope it goes fast for you! > > Missie > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 2:32 PM, chandelle' <earthmother213<earthmother213%40gmail.com> > > > > > wrote: > > > > > being potty " trained " generally only refers to day time dryness. 80% - > > > 90% > > > of kids are dry all day by 4. night dryness is generally not considered > > > something that can be taught or learned. it comes with physiological > > > development. my son still gets a diaper at night and he will until his > > body > > > is ready to hold urine all night. but he's dry all day, which is what > > > " potty trained " really means, clinically. > > > > > > chandelle > > > > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM, <danitamark<danitamark%40earthlink.net> > > <danitamark%40earthlink.net>> > > > wrote: > > > > > > > for future reference since a large portion of kids struggle with night > > > > time dryness even after being " trained " > > > > > > > > I highly reccommend > > > > > > > > Dry All Night: The Picture Book Technique That Stops Bedwetting by > > Alison > > > > Mack > > > > > > > > I think it's out of print but you can find it online. > > > > > > > > there's a section for kids to read and a sectio for parents to read. > > > great > > > > images for kids to process before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > > D > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > " if voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal. " > > > > > > ~emma goldman > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 I don't know about forcing a child to sit for like half an hour on a pot. Maybe that works for some, but my children were very active and would have hated that, turning it into some kind of a power struggle. I never had to force my child to sit for any amount of time. Again both of mine were trained by two, I started sometime around a year and a half, earlier with my girl a little later with my boy. I would just try to make it a point to take them to the pot approximately every half an hour to hour depending on how often I could get them there and time of day. I found it too hard to get in and out of diapers that often, but I used cloth so maybe that is why. When possible I would leave them without pants to make it easier when at home. I would praise them for effort and for actually going. I tried to make it fun, making up silly songs and such. I never had any regressing after they were trained, except with my son, he did for a short time have a few accidents at night maybe six months or so after being completely trained. I never punished accidents or made it a bad thing when accidents occured. I was just like okay, maybe next time we can make it to the pot. Again as I did start early, I was responsible for taking my children to the pot (whether they asked or not) and making sure that their pants were pulled down. I would lift them to the pot if needed. I have even seen three and four year olds who need help with pulling their pants down. So I didn't think this was bad. I was looking forward to not washing diapers, and do not believe in disposible. I have both used a stool and had a special potty chair. They only noticible difference being them missing the special chair when removed. Laura Ballinger Morales Renee Carroll <renecarol25 Monday, May 19, 2008 3:51:43 PM Re: Re: [) training pants/uncomfortable I'm the last person to offer advice on this one but I'm going to chime in on 'what not to do.' As my daughter was nearly 4 when she was finally potty trainned. I had heard that you should wait to potty train until they are at least 2 years old. But I wanted her potty trained by 2. We started at 19 months. She did very well in the beginning and by the time she turned two she was pretty much potty trained and always sat on the potty during the day when she was awake. Somewhere around the time she turned 3 (went from nearly completely potty trainned except for nights and occasional accidents during the day) she just decided she didn't want to use the potty anymore and absolutely refused to go at all. The novelty of it had worn off and it took another close to a year before she was finally potty trainned. It had become a power struggle and I think she was acting out. In retrospect I think I had started her too early. Renee Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet@ > wrote: My daughter will fight the diaper, fight the training pants, uses the potty some times. I am going to go get " big girl panties " this evening and do the diapers at night. She will be 2 on June 1, so I have some time, yet I feel things are not going right. Cassie ad00rable_1 <nkiffer (AT) charter (DOT) net> wrote: I agree w/ the going w/o bottoms. We started out doing that and as soon as we tried to have her start wearing pants (comfy pants as we call them...any easy to pull up and down elastic waist pants) it threw everything for a loop. It took a while before she was back on track. I agree with other comments that every child is different in their learning to use the potty. I'm extremely intrigued by the EC approach now. I have a friend with 4 children who took that approach and they had all learned well before they were 2. She has two boys and two girls. I didn't learn about that route until my little one was almost two. If we have another I think I'll give it a shot. My approach...I just took in all the info I was getting from people and books, and came up with what I felt comfortable doing (mind you nothing was super comfortable, honestly I was more nervous about potty learning than anything else I've done so far as a parent). Two books I purchased that had some good advice were " Potty Free before 3 " and " The No-Cry Potty Training Solution " . -Nancy @gro ups.com, chandelle' <earthmother213@ ...> wrote: > > i think nakedness is one of the best things for being able to use the > potty. for a year, from about 18 months to 2 1/2-3, my son would use the > potty 100% of the time, for pee and poop, if he was naked. > > chandelle > > On Sun, May 18, 2008 at 6:48 PM, Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet@ ...> > wrote: > > > We have been allowing Lily to run around the house w/o bottoms so that > > she is able to get to the potty. I was packing some things (we move in 28 > > days!) and she was walking on the bubble wrap. She started looking > > frantically for the potty and kept repeating " Potty chair, potty chair " . She > > ran over and sat. Just as she was sitting, a little squirt of poo slid down > > the side of the chair, but everything else made it in! LOL > > About 15 minutes later, my husband was telling my mother in law the story, > > and Lily ran into the kitchen and didn't even look for the potty chair. She > > squatted on the kitchen floor and more smooshy poo came out. Like, she heard > > and understood what they wer talking about and wanted to show her, too! LOL > > > > It was super gross and cute at the same time > > Cassie > > > > Missie Ward <mszzzi <mszzzi%40gmail. com>> wrote: My son is in > > the latter 10% that was not. He's nearly 5 now (next month) and > > he's finally (hopefully) gotten through all this. > > > > It's a long story, and we never started until he was asking us about it - > > which was at 18 mo's and then we were on a car trip to help my grandma move > > and sell her house after my grandpa died, and the auto-flush toilets took > > care of that for about a year or so before we could even mention it again. > > It had since been on again/off again and for nearly a year, but the last 4 > > weeks, after a chat and a doc visit (we suspected possibly he had > > encopresis, but turns out he was and is just headstrong and strong willed. > > The visit took out the butting heads with us on having him use the potty, > > as > > it was 'Doctor's orders' that he sit 30min's after every meal, not our > > decision or rules). Worked fine. > > > > In the begining before we were sabbotaged by the auto-flush we did go from > > cloth to undies, but we used the vinyl ones that were lined, and I also > > found a pattern online for sewing fleece ones that looked like shorts, and > > you just laid the cloth diaper in there. I also knit some pull up type > > covers for them, from acrylic which worked fine despite what you can find > > online for the most part (I did find some places folks said acrylic worked > > for them and I had some, and tried it, and they did work, but not entirely > > for overnights if it was a heavy wetting night). We switched to whatever > > diapers that whole foods had that were unbleached and I think biodegradable > > for overnights or our son would never sleep through the night. > > He still has issues overnight, but is completely fine during the day. > > If you have any questions on how to start, we used the dr. sears site (I > > think it's www.askdrsears. com) they have a checklist to be sure your child > > is ready first, and some helpful things on starting and what not, even for > > the reluctant child...of course our case was in the minority, and > > circumstances were off for us, but I know what we got from there worked > > very > > well when he was in a positive/receptive mood for it. He's different now, > > so > > none of the info we had would work for him since he was a much later > > 'bloomer'. > > > > If you have any questions, you can also ask me, as I think we did it ALL, > > but the headstrong child had his own agenda back then. LOL. It's funny now, > > but like someone else mentioned, it is a very frustrating process. If it's > > nto working, put it away for a month or so, until they're receptive to the > > idea again and try then. :)Just be sure they're ready to start, and be sure > > you're ready for it too, as accidents do, and will happen when you start > > (some have children that take to it easier than others). > > > > Good luck, and I hope it goes fast for you! > > Missie > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 2:32 PM, chandelle' <earthmother213@ ...<earthmother2 13%40gmail. com> > > > > > wrote: > > > > > being potty " trained " generally only refers to day time dryness. 80% - > > > 90% > > > of kids are dry all day by 4. night dryness is generally not considered > > > something that can be taught or learned. it comes with physiological > > > development. my son still gets a diaper at night and he will until his > > body > > > is ready to hold urine all night. but he's dry all day, which is what > > > " potty trained " really means, clinically. > > > > > > chandelle > > > > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM, <danitamark@ ...<danitamark% 40earthlink. net> > > <danitamark% 40earthlink. net>> > > > wrote: > > > > > > > for future reference since a large portion of kids struggle with night > > > > time dryness even after being " trained " > > > > > > > > I highly reccommend > > > > > > > > Dry All Night: The Picture Book Technique That Stops Bedwetting by > > Alison > > > > Mack > > > > > > > > I think it's out of print but you can find it online. > > > > > > > > there's a section for kids to read and a sectio for parents to read. > > > great > > > > images for kids to process before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > > D > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > " if voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal. " > > > > > > ~emma goldman > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 20, 2008 Report Share Posted May 20, 2008 We tried everything else, and this was after 2 different times of our son being 'potty trained', and he later decided either he didn't want to, or was scared of it from the auto-flusher or just being headstrong and just not doing it because we said. He is also very active, but we spent time in with him, or he'd do mazes and color or do word finds or read his books, or we'd take turns reading together. It was the ONLY time we could have him sit, and it was only after meals. I think if he was under 4 he would have had a much larger issue with sitting for that long, but he's nearly 5, so it seems to have worked out well. He's been doing great on the potty since then, though overnights are still touch and go, but that's easier to deal with for some reason (he's also a very heavy sleeper and we can move him or even had to on occasion change him and he never wakes up LOL). Timers didn't work, stickers didn't work, reward charts (any kind of reward eventually just turned into 'I don't care/don't want it/whatever'). We tried every half hour, and he even just decieded to not go while he was on it, and wait till he was in between times to go (he'd get off the pot and then either soil himself or the floor whereever he was after that). We did timers, going naked at home, nothing worked at the time he was not in a receptive mood for the whole business (which besides being ready physically and emotionally) is really another key point. If they're not into it, forget it. We tried, we put it away for a month, or 2 or even nearly a whole year. The Doc told us to have him sit for 30 min's after a meal, because there's the natural bm reflex that happens about that long after you eat. If he had a bm he could get off the pot earlier than the 30mins This was the only thing that worked for him, and maybe because the whole idea came from his Doctor, whom I might add he just adores, even though I think we never see her. Whatever it was that she said or how she put it, it worked. A timer never worked, because he knew very early on that WE set the timer, not that it was just randomly tuned into his body and hey he shoudl go sit now. He was never fooled for a minute by that ploy. LOL. Different techniques work for different children. If they are ready, I hear it goes very smoothly and fast. We have a friend who didnt' try till their son was maybe 3.5yrs old. He was done in a week (including overnights) and they didnt' have any kind of issues. We never wanted to start early, our son initiated it, we had a family crisis and we had to drive to help my mom and grandma out for nearly a month (the car trip and the auto-flush incident, being away from 'home' for about a month) really set us back by about a year. I think if we'd have not had to do that, he'd probably have been in the 'easy and fast' category. His world was turned upside down, so I can see how he needed to have control over something. once it was 'his idea' or at least not OURS, he was fine and took to it quickly (like he did the first round, but with our vacation falling at the same time, he's still a champ and maybe in a month he's had 2 slight accidents - which is nothing but a drop in a bucket). Things that worked when he was little (and most of the stuff we found online) was geared for smaller kids or we just didn't believe in it (well, not till much later when we tried everything because he was kicked out of a pre-school because of the issues he was having). We were doubtful the after a meal sitting would work, but it did. We were afraid he'd not be able to go to Kindergarten at the rate he was going. I think the only advice I can give is that they have to be receptive to it (not in a 'no' phase really), and have all the signs. We had some varying success with charting using stickers or spirals and dots, and after so many a reward (something small, usually something active for us to do together, or something like that that he liked to do - a special trip to see the train garden or whatever). Find something that will motivate them, or it won't work if you go that route. I still think it's up to the child, when they're ready it's very easy. If you meet with resistance, put the whole business away for a while, until you think they can try again. It could be in a month, or 2 - just make sure you both are ready for it as it can be very frustrating for you both and I think they do pick up on your feelings, so if you're resistant to it, they will be as well. I'm just glad it's all over now. I think he would have been fine earlier, when he first initiated it, but I think most of it was the death in the family that was the larger problem after that. The others, I know, were power struggles so we just gave up and tried again when the time was right (or so we though). It can be tricky to find what works, I know some folks who had problems well up through 1st grade, and others who trained in a week. It can be one of the most frustrating things to go through with your children, especially when they are physically and emotionally ready, but they just have their own idea and their own time line they aren't letting you in on. LOL. Missie On Mon, May 19, 2008 at 7:02 PM, Laura Ballinger Morales < lballinger wrote: > I don't know about forcing a child to sit for like half an hour on a > pot. Maybe that works for some, but my children were very active and would > have hated that, turning it into some kind of a power struggle. I never had > to force my child to sit for any amount of time. Again both of mine were > trained by two, I started sometime around a year and a half, earlier with my > girl a little later with my boy. I would just try to make it a point to > take them to the pot approximately every half an hour to hour depending on > how often I could get them there and time of day. I found it too hard to > get in and out of diapers that often, but I used cloth so maybe that is > why. When possible I would leave them without pants to make it easier when > at home. I would praise them for effort and for actually going. I tried to > make it fun, making up silly songs and such. I never had any > regressing after they were trained, except with my son, he did for > a short time have a few accidents at night maybe six months or so after > being completely trained. I never punished accidents or made it a bad thing > when accidents occured. I was just like okay, maybe next time we can make > it to the pot. > Again as I did start early, I was responsible for taking my children to > the pot (whether they asked or not) and making sure that their pants were > pulled down. I would lift them to the pot if needed. I have even seen > three and four year olds who need help with pulling their pants down. So I > didn't think this was bad. I was looking forward to not washing diapers, > and do not believe in disposible. I have both used a stool and had a > special potty chair. They only noticible difference being them missing the > special chair when removed. > Laura Ballinger Morales > > > > Renee Carroll <renecarol25 <renecarol25%40>> > <%40> > Monday, May 19, 2008 3:51:43 PM > Re: Re: [) training pants/uncomfortable > > I'm the last person to offer advice on this one but I'm going to chime in > on 'what not to do.' As my daughter was nearly 4 when she was finally potty > trainned. I had heard that you should wait to potty train until they are at > least 2 years old. But I wanted her potty trained by 2. We started at 19 > months. She did very well in the beginning and by the time she turned two > she was pretty much potty trained and always sat on the potty during the day > when she was awake. Somewhere around the time she turned 3 (went from nearly > completely potty trainned except for nights and occasional accidents during > the day) she just decided she didn't want to use the potty anymore and > absolutely refused to go at all. The novelty of it had worn off and it took > another close to a year before she was finally potty trainned. It had become > a power struggle and I think she was acting out. In retrospect I think I had > started her too early. > Renee > > Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet@ > wrote: > My daughter will fight the diaper, fight the training pants, uses the potty > some times. I am going to go get " big girl panties " this evening and do the > diapers at night. She will be 2 on June 1, so I have some time, yet I feel > things are not going right. > Cassie > > ad00rable_1 <nkiffer (AT) charter (DOT) net> wrote: I agree w/ the going w/o > bottoms. We started out doing that and as soon as we tried to > have her start wearing pants (comfy pants as we call them...any easy to > pull up and down > elastic waist pants) it threw everything for a loop. It took a while before > she was back on > track. I agree with other comments that every child is different in their > learning to use the > potty. > I'm extremely intrigued by the EC approach now. I have a friend with 4 > children who took > that approach and they had all learned well before they were 2. She has two > boys and two > girls. I didn't learn about that route until my little one was almost two. > If we have another I > think I'll give it a shot. > My approach...I just took in all the info I was getting from people and > books, and came up > with what I felt comfortable doing (mind you nothing was super comfortable, > honestly I > was more nervous about potty learning than anything else I've done so far > as a parent). > Two books I purchased that had some good advice were " Potty Free before 3 " > and " The > No-Cry Potty Training Solution " . > > -Nancy > > @gro ups.com, chandelle' <earthmother213@ ...> > wrote: > > > > i think nakedness is one of the best things for being able to use the > > potty. for a year, from about 18 months to 2 1/2-3, my son would use the > > potty 100% of the time, for pee and poop, if he was naked. > > > > chandelle > > > > On Sun, May 18, 2008 at 6:48 PM, Cassie Dixon <roxy87cabriolet@ ...> > > wrote: > > > > > We have been allowing Lily to run around the house w/o bottoms so that > > > she is able to get to the potty. I was packing some things (we move in > 28 > > > days!) and she was walking on the bubble wrap. She started looking > > > frantically for the potty and kept repeating " Potty chair, potty > chair " . She > > > ran over and sat. Just as she was sitting, a little squirt of poo slid > down > > > the side of the chair, but everything else made it in! LOL > > > About 15 minutes later, my husband was telling my mother in law the > story, > > > and Lily ran into the kitchen and didn't even look for the potty chair. > She > > > squatted on the kitchen floor and more smooshy poo came out. Like, she > heard > > > and understood what they wer talking about and wanted to show her, too! > LOL > > > > > > It was super gross and cute at the same time > > > Cassie > > > > > > Missie Ward <mszzzi <mszzzi%40gmail. com>> wrote: My son is in > > > the latter 10% that was not. He's nearly 5 now (next month) and > > > he's finally (hopefully) gotten through all this. > > > > > > It's a long story, and we never started until he was asking us about it > - > > > which was at 18 mo's and then we were on a car trip to help my grandma > move > > > and sell her house after my grandpa died, and the auto-flush toilets > took > > > care of that for about a year or so before we could even mention it > again. > > > It had since been on again/off again and for nearly a year, but the > last 4 > > > weeks, after a chat and a doc visit (we suspected possibly he had > > > encopresis, but turns out he was and is just headstrong and strong > willed. > > > The visit took out the butting heads with us on having him use the > potty, > > > as > > > it was 'Doctor's orders' that he sit 30min's after every meal, not our > > > decision or rules). Worked fine. > > > > > > In the begining before we were sabbotaged by the auto-flush we did go > from > > > cloth to undies, but we used the vinyl ones that were lined, and I also > > > found a pattern online for sewing fleece ones that looked like shorts, > and > > > you just laid the cloth diaper in there. I also knit some pull up type > > > covers for them, from acrylic which worked fine despite what you can > find > > > online for the most part (I did find some places folks said acrylic > worked > > > for them and I had some, and tried it, and they did work, but not > entirely > > > for overnights if it was a heavy wetting night). We switched to > whatever > > > diapers that whole foods had that were unbleached and I think > biodegradable > > > for overnights or our son would never sleep through the night. > > > He still has issues overnight, but is completely fine during the day. > > > If you have any questions on how to start, we used the dr. sears site > (I > > > think it's www.askdrsears. com) they have a checklist to be sure your > child > > > is ready first, and some helpful things on starting and what not, even > for > > > the reluctant child...of course our case was in the minority, and > > > circumstances were off for us, but I know what we got from there worked > > > very > > > well when he was in a positive/receptive mood for it. He's different > now, > > > so > > > none of the info we had would work for him since he was a much later > > > 'bloomer'. > > > > > > If you have any questions, you can also ask me, as I think we did it > ALL, > > > but the headstrong child had his own agenda back then. LOL. It's funny > now, > > > but like someone else mentioned, it is a very frustrating process. If > it's > > > nto working, put it away for a month or so, until they're receptive to > the > > > idea again and try then. :)Just be sure they're ready to start, and be > sure > > > you're ready for it too, as accidents do, and will happen when you > start > > > (some have children that take to it easier than others). > > > > > > Good luck, and I hope it goes fast for you! > > > Missie > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 2:32 PM, chandelle' > <earthmother213@ ...<earthmother2 13%40gmail. com> > > > > > > > > wrote: > > > > > > > being potty " trained " generally only refers to day time dryness. 80% > - > > > > 90% > > > > of kids are dry all day by 4. night dryness is generally not > considered > > > > something that can be taught or learned. it comes with physiological > > > > development. my son still gets a diaper at night and he will until > his > > > body > > > > is ready to hold urine all night. but he's dry all day, which is what > > > > " potty trained " really means, clinically. > > > > > > > > chandelle > > > > > > > > > > > > On Fri, May 16, 2008 at 11:43 AM, <danitamark@ ...<danitamark% > 40earthlink. net> > > > <danitamark% 40earthlink. net>> > > > > wrote: > > > > > > > > > for future reference since a large portion of kids struggle with > night > > > > > time dryness even after being " trained " > > > > > > > > > > I highly reccommend > > > > > > > > > > Dry All Night: The Picture Book Technique That Stops Bedwetting by > > > Alison > > > > > Mack > > > > > > > > > > I think it's out of print but you can find it online. > > > > > > > > > > there's a section for kids to read and a sectio for parents to > read. > > > > great > > > > > images for kids to process before they go to sleep. > > > > > > > > > > D > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > -- > > > > " if voting changed anything, they'd make it illegal. " > > > > > > > > ~emma goldman > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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