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Steve Fields, Richard Jones, J ohnE, updates?

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dear chrism... i'm into the practice and still holding the possibility of k in

the highest

regard, praying to the goddess regularly. at times i'm envious of others'

descriptions of

visions, lights, knowledge... and then i realize we learn at our own pace, in

our own unique

process. i'm happy that i feel i've been of service in helping people take

responsibility for

their own healing. and i enjoy 'sending' energy towards that process. there are

other

challenges for me. feelings of anxiety or loneliness that, at times, will lead

to a pattern of

getting into porn and masturbation, and then feeling like i've broken a rule of

some kind as

well as feeling physically uncomfortable symptoms. in the past, before our k

seminar

together, the most joyful thing i'd experience on a regular basis was to get

high and dance

or play the drum. and now, since i no longer get high, these things have been ok

but far

less ecstatic. so i'm praying to experience that joy in some new way. recently

i've taken

some yoga classes and have felt very balanced after each of them. i would

welcome any

input or suggestions you may have.

love,

-steve f

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