Astral Dynamics - Ray (long)

[Guest guest]

In a message dated 7/17/2006 10:28:25 PM GMT Standard Time,

raazor writes:

 

I can certainly relate with the last part of your statement about " . . .

strongly held belief systems will override the memories and make them

impossible

to remember . . . " in that I was pursuing OBEs many years ago (seemingly

getting very close by the lucid dreams I was having every night) and talked to

my priest about it (at my wife's firm request). He put the kabash on it in no

uncertain terms and then wham, no more dreams!

I am now trying to rebuild. I seem to be getting there, but it's a slow

process.

 

 

 

 

 

<<<<<<<<<<<

 

 

Ray - I can relate to a LOT of what you say! The priest, the alcoholic

father, not being in " sync " with the spouse, the parental fights, and of

course, " trying to rebuild. " Let's just say, " I understand completely. "

 

It is so hard to know what to do when one has been brought up in a

world of such strange contradictions and conditions. It can make a person

dizzy

just trying to make sense of it all.

 

Here's an example: The other day, I was telling my mother, " Some

people believe that you choose your issues before you come to Earth, and it

makes

sense to me that maybe I chose to get the hard stuff over with first and then

coast through the second half of life, because that's just my personality. "

 

She looked at me with her Catholic self and said, " BEFORE you came to

Earth? " And I said, " Yes, if we came FROM the spiritual world. " The

expression on her face was priceless as she said, " Where did you get a crazy

idea

like that from? " I didn't try to explain. I couldn't if I wanted to. Then

she

proceeded to tell me that things would never get easier. (Take it from

her.) Another " truth " that I was supposed to swallow.

 

But one day it occurred to me that I often feel guilty even if I didn't

do anything wrong, just because my mother convinced me that people might

" think " I did something wrong. She convinced me (indirectly) that what other

people " think " is what I am all about, and we read minds because we know what

other people are thinking, and they are thinking the worst, we just " know "

they are. Kind of explains why my father drank! LOL!

 

She means well, she really does, but this is another example of how I

was taught to make my decisions based on " irrational thinking. " So for me it

went kind of like this: At first I realized that (maybe) my childhood was a

bit dysfunctional. Then I was angry. How could they do this to me? But

then I made my own mistakes. And at different points in my life I woke up to

the frightening realization that I was my mother or I was my father or I was my

ex-husband. That is when true forgiveness set in. When I turned into the

people I was the most angry at.

 

And I realized how things can make a full circle sometimes. How you

can find yourself switching roles before you knew what happened. How you can

find yourself becoming the person you most judged. Then, all judgments go out

the window. I hope you don't have to experience this. But judgments and

grudges have a way of going away, sooner or later. They just do. All darkness

has a way of coming into the light of understanding. We can do it by

choice, or we can find out the hard way.

 

At this point, the only thing left to do is forgive yourself. Then

heal yourself. And one more thing:

 

A few weeks ago my husband had the sci-fi channel on and there was a

story of a lady who had been through some terrible experience and then came

back where she was to start again in another world. She said she would never

be

able to go through with it after what she had been through, and another lady

told her, " Yes you can. All you have to do is forget. " Then they gave her

amnesia with some sort of technology, and she was all happy again.

 

And it made me realize that there also comes a point where the only

thing left to do is to " forget. " To really just put it " out of your mind. "

Then you open up all sorts of avenues for newer, happier beginnings.

 

Sorry I got on a long roll again. But it seemed important, somehow. I

hope it helps.

 

Deb

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Hello Deb,

You have very good things to say. Ideas and experiences that

all of us can relate to at one time or another. So please continue to gift us

with your thoughts and feelings and explorations, we are the better for it as

are you. -