Guest guest Posted September 22, 2006 Report Share Posted September 22, 2006 For the past few weeks I have been intergrating my male side, he has had some catching up to do. I feel as though I have been going through my childhood again, then into teenager, I'm about 21 right now I guess...hee hee. All new hormones seem to be affecting me (maybe my testosterone levels have increased?) I have been more agressive, some pimples, some strong desires. I think my sacral chakra must be opening, not sure what stage it's at... Not sure if I can function sexually yet, but I have had period pains since my last period, as my fertility is returned. It's like being a teenager going through puberty. My male side has an addictive personality right now, he wants to binge a little as my female side lovingly embraces it and waits for him to settle down so I can get back onto my alkaline diet.... He wants coffee, meat, rice, whisky, smoke. Funny really. So thats me right now, Lots of love Elektra x x x _________ Messenger - NEW crystal clear PC to PC calling worldwide with voicemail http://uk.messenger. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Ah, those teenage years. Enjoy it. Fall in love with your husband, again. Reach out. What a great and adventureous time. Great to hear from you, as always, Elektra. BlessU Sam , Elektra Fire <elektra.fire wrote: > > All new hormones seem to be affecting me (maybe my > testosterone levels have increased?) I have been more > agressive, some pimples, some strong desires. > .... > He wants coffee, meat, rice, whisky, smoke. > > Funny really. > > So thats me right now, > > Lots of love Elektra x x x > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Hi Sam, you know the honest truth is I'm a bit confused right now, I have been wanting to seperate from my husband, an urge has come over me to be alone. And whats more, I have felt myself desire other more aggressive masculine's, when I married my husband I wasn't whole in some respects, now I'm becoming whole I am changing and don't know where that leaves us? He's my best friend but I don't know if I desire him in a sexual way... We talk about this openly with one another, so then I get more confused as what more can a woman want than honesty? Sexual passion? I have to do alot of surrendering right now as my life is in a tizz. I hope to fall in love with my husband all over again but at the moment I just want to be free..... I will just have to keep centered and " feel " what is right for me as I grow. A little personal stuff for you there but it's good to talk about it as it's part of the kundalini processing. When I'm complete do I need a man any longer? Any coments appriciated.... Much love elektra x x x Bless u too Sam, hope you are feeling better. --- Sam <dallyup52 wrote: > Ah, those teenage years. Enjoy it. Fall in love > with your husband, > again. Reach out. What a great and adventureous > time. > > Great to hear from you, as always, Elektra. > > BlessU > Sam > _________ All new Mail " The new Interface is stunning in its simplicity and ease of use. " - PC Magazine http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 One other thing I've been thinking is that our relationship with our spouse is just a reflection of our inner self, so when we pecieve some one as " lacking " something is it just that we lack it ourselves? Is it just the teenager in me that wants to have lovers (if it becomes possible for me to function in that way). It sure is a rollercoaster ride as chrism said. Lucky my husband is so understanding and open or else we would be in a real crisis right now. I'm not fearful at all, just becoming unattached in some way. Probably just part of the process. Everyday brings new change. I will see my husband for the first time in three months at the end of october so we'll know by then whats going on for us. Love Elektra x x x _________ Try the all-new Mail. " The New Version is radically easier to use " – The Wall Street Journal http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Sound Exciting Elektra! Glad to hear that things are going well for your, what interesting experiences you are having! WOW! Love, KatherineElektra Fire <elektra.fire wrote: For the past few weeks I have been intergrating mymale side, he has had some catching up to do.I feel as though I have been going through mychildhood again, then into teenager, I'm about 21right now I guess...hee hee.All new hormones seem to be affecting me (maybe mytestosterone levels have increased?) I have been moreagressive, some pimples, some strong desires.I think my sacral chakra must be opening, not surewhat stage it's at...Not sure if I can function sexually yet, but I havehad period pains since my last period, as my fertilityis returned. It's like being a teenager going throughpuberty.My male side has an addictive personality right now,he wants to binge a little as my female side lovinglyembraces it and waits for him to settle down so I canget back onto my alkaline diet....He wants coffee, meat, rice, whisky, smoke.Funny really.So thats me right now,Lots of love Elektra x x x________ Messenger - NEW crystal clear PC to PC calling worldwide with voicemail http://uk.messenger.Love and Peace for Eternity,Katherine Get on board. You're invited to try the new Mail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Elektra, I don't know what you are experiencing because I am not you! I don't know how you feel because I am not you, I can only feel what I think you might feel through your emotions you exhibit through your writings. I feel confusion and uncertainty. I can tell you that I have experienced all of what you are talking about, but not because of K, but because my husband is in the military and he used to be on submarines and he would leave for 3 to 4 months at a time, and that feeling of loneliness, oh those feelings, they were so confussing. I found my self desiring others, yes. I felt like when he came back it was getting to know each other all over again and again and again and again. It was a never ending cycle and I think that part of me gave up on it because it is tiring and confussing and we each change so much, and being together it allows us to change together, but being apart and changing cause seperation, not in the true sense, but in the emotional sense, a constant rollercoaster of emotions. Although I never did go with my desires it doesn't mean they weren't there on the fly when he would leave and that was mostly because of the need for compainionship, the need for him to just be there and be able to just walk up to him and hug him when I wanted to, or tell him I loved him, or what might be going on that day! It was stressful, yet when he would come home I desired that seperation, the need for being alone, and I think that need only developed because it had become a part of our lives. When he starts preparing for sea, I start preparing emotionally. Why, because it was easier to shut down my feelings, all of my feelings, sexual and all to avoid the pain of him leaving. When he is gone out to sea there is no communication except family grams and then it is only 50 words which included his name my name, etc.etc. So I think to answer your guestion about a companion, yes it is nice to have one, of I would need it. He and I have suffered some hardships because of his time in the Navy, and we have had some really tough times, but we stuck through it making as many good times as possible to drowned out the bad, rocky, etc. and here we are 20 years later happily married, with two wonderful chrildren! Only 2 1/2 more years and he is out of the Navy, well deserved retirement (24 years)! We were meant to be together and that is why we have made it, at least for now, who knows what the future holds! Hopefully a lot of smiles, happiness, and enjoyment of each other and our kids! I know you will know, like I knew so many times when I questioned my relationhip with my husband! Love and Peace for Eternity,Katherine Get your email and more, right on the new .com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Elektra, Thank-you, yes, I am feeling better. > When I'm complete do I need a man any longer? First ... " wants " drive " needs " . This isn't my opinion, it's just the way we work as humans. (Silly humans.) If you look at what you think that you " need " there is always a " want " that drives it. Like " I need to breath air " Only if you " want " to keep this body alive. I " need " a man in my life. Only if you " want " that type of relationship. It has nothing to do with being " complete " . We are all complete. Some of us just have more of an awareness of that state of being. The best and most enduring part of relationship is the friendship. The physically/sexual relationship is just one way of expressing a loving relationship. There are many other energetic relationships that are more intense and deeper than the physical/sexual part. > Sexual passion? This may have more to do with where your energy flows are right now. Maybe partly from the past you swam through. (Remember, you set that up to get you where you are now. And you expended considerable time, energy and emotion to get yourself here. You may want to take advantage of that setup.) >what more can a woman want than honesty? Honesty is certainly important but even that is a slippery path. Prospective changes the importance and relevance considerably. " Does my ass look fat in this dress? " type of honesty. Or " Is there some way that I can help you deal with your emotional pain? " type of question. Then there are even more important types of issues, like, " Can you keep a commitment to yourself or to another? " " Do you respect yourself and those close to you? " blah blah blah > but at the moment I just want to be free.... You are " free " and always have been. This is what it is like to be free. : ) Sorry if I am getting too personal (and maybe too direct) but when I was writing the last message (the one you responded to) I got a bit of a hit about you and your husband. I know that I am not getting too close but I may be talking about it to openly. There is no " right " answer. Just different paths. You will be wonderfully fine no matter what you do. BlessU Sam , Elektra Fire <elektra.fire wrote: > > Hi Sam, > > you know the honest truth is I'm a bit confused right > now, I have been wanting to seperate from my husband, > an urge has come over me to be alone. > And whats more, I have felt myself desire other more > aggressive masculine's, > when I married my husband I wasn't whole in some > respects, now I'm becoming whole I am changing and > don't know where that leaves us? > He's my best friend but I don't know if I desire him > in a sexual way... > We talk about this openly with one another, so then I > get more confused as what more can a woman want than > honesty? > Sexual passion? > I have to do alot of surrendering right now as my life > is in a tizz. > I hope to fall in love with my husband all over again > but at the moment I just want to be free..... > I will just have to keep centered and " feel " what is > right for me as I grow. > > A little personal stuff for you there but it's good to > talk about it as it's part of the kundalini > processing. > > When I'm complete do I need a man any longer? > > Any coments appriciated.... > > Much love elektra x x x > > Bless u too Sam, hope you are feeling better. > > > --- Sam <dallyup52 wrote: > > > Ah, those teenage years. Enjoy it. Fall in love > > with your husband, > > again. Reach out. What a great and adventureous > > time. > > > > Great to hear from you, as always, Elektra. > > > > BlessU > > Sam > > _________ > All new Mail " The new Interface is stunning in its simplicity and ease of use. " - PC Magazine > http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 23, 2006 Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Yes Sam, and of course in most respects you are right, I have come to these conclusions also, but the truth is I have spent the last two weeks on a rollercoaster and it's been like trying to gain clarity in the midst of hormonal and emotional termoil. Thats why I say " my teenage " years And, when I say honesty, I mean that me and my husband share a very powerful kind of telepathy , which is great in some respects but whenever I start pulling away from him, mentally he feels it so we have learnt to be very open with one another. I'm greatful to process this now with you guys on here, it's been a crazy few weeks but I feel at peace now and feel I can discuss it here, I know that I'm peeling off layers of myslef right now, detatching myself from things, reintergrating, I'm trying to die and be reborn. So, this is just another level of the processing. All is well in my life, my husband has offered me a divorce freely if I ever feel I want it, that was when I realised that I was always free, as like you said Sam, freedom is a state of mind, body and spirit. Thankyou Sam, and everyone, Elektra x x x > Elektra, > > Thank-you, yes, I am feeling better. > > > When I'm complete do I need a man any longer? > > First ... " wants " drive " needs " . > > This isn't my opinion, it's just the way we work as > humans. (Silly > humans.) > If you look at what you think that you " need " there > is always a " want " > that drives it. Like " I need to breath air " Only > if you " want " to > keep this body alive. I " need " a man in my life. > Only if you " want " > that type of relationship. It has nothing to do > with being > " complete " . We are all complete. Some of us just > have more of an > awareness of that state of being. > > The best and most enduring part of relationship is > the friendship. > > The physically/sexual relationship is just one way > of expressing a > loving relationship. There are many other energetic > relationships that > are more intense and deeper than the physical/sexual > part. > > > Sexual passion? > > This may have more to do with where your energy > flows are right now. > Maybe partly from the past you swam through. > (Remember, you set that > up to get you where you are now. And you expended > considerable time, > energy and emotion to get yourself here. You may > want to take > advantage of that setup.) > > >what more can a woman want than honesty? > > Honesty is certainly important but even that is a > slippery path. > Prospective changes the importance and relevance > considerably. " Does > my ass look fat in this dress? " type of honesty. Or > " Is there some way > that I can help you deal with your emotional pain? " > type of question. > Then there are even more important types of issues, > like, " Can you > keep a commitment to yourself or to another? " " Do > you respect > yourself and those close to you? " blah blah blah > > > but at the moment I just want to be free.... > > You are " free " and always have been. This is what > it is like to be > free. : ) > > Sorry if I am getting too personal (and maybe too > direct) but when I > was writing the last message (the one you responded > to) I got a bit of > a hit about you and your husband. I know that I am > not getting too > close but I may be talking about it to openly. > > There is no " right " answer. Just different paths. > You will be > wonderfully fine no matter what you do. > > BlessU > Sam > --- In > , > Elektra Fire > <elektra.fire wrote: > > > > Hi Sam, > > > > you know the honest truth is I'm a bit confused > right > > now, I have been wanting to seperate from my > husband, > > an urge has come over me to be alone. > > And whats more, I have felt myself desire other > more > > aggressive masculine's, > > when I married my husband I wasn't whole in some > > respects, now I'm becoming whole I am changing and > > don't know where that leaves us? > > He's my best friend but I don't know if I desire > him > > in a sexual way... > > We talk about this openly with one another, so > then I > > get more confused as what more can a woman want > than > > honesty? > > Sexual passion? > > I have to do alot of surrendering right now as my > life > > is in a tizz. > > I hope to fall in love with my husband all over > again > > but at the moment I just want to be free..... > > I will just have to keep centered and " feel " what > is > > right for me as I grow. > > > > A little personal stuff for you there but it's > good to > > talk about it as it's part of the kundalini > > processing. > > > > When I'm complete do I need a man any longer? > > > > Any coments appriciated.... > > > > Much love elektra x x x > > > > Bless u too Sam, hope you are feeling better. > > > > > > --- Sam <dallyup52 wrote: > > > > > Ah, those teenage years. Enjoy it. Fall in > love > > > with your husband, > > > again. Reach out. What a great and > adventureous > > > time. > > > > > > Great to hear from you, as always, Elektra. > > > > > > BlessU > > > Sam > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _________ > > > All new Mail " The new Interface is stunning > in its simplicity > and ease of use. " - PC Magazine > > http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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