Domestic violence against men (VAM)

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Domestic violence against men (VAM) is specifically an act of relationship

violence against men, perpetrated by a woman in a romantic relationship with the

man. The perpetrators of the violence are often the man's wife, girlfriend, or

fiancee.

 

Domestic violence against men, as with domestic violence in general, can take

myriad forms from subtle to extreme, and encompasses both physical and

non-physical violence. Some of the domestic abuses committed against men include

verbal assault, psychological manipulation, emotional abuse, sexual assault,

emasculation, or rape, all committed by a girlfriend, wife or fiancee in a

relationship with a male. Women may also engage in more subtle, but still

damaging, domestic violence against men by treating sex as a weapon or bartering

chip, and attempting to manipulate and control their male partner with it.

 

Similar to a hate crime, this type of violence targets a specific group with the

victim's gender as a primary motive. The United Nations General Assembly defines

" violence against men " as " any act of gender-based violence that results in, or

is likely to result in, physical, sexual or mental harm or suffering to men,

including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty,

whether occurring in public or in private life. "

 

 

 

The characteristics of men or women who are abusive fall into three categories.

 

a.. Alcohol Abuse. Alcohol abuse is a major cause and trigger in domestic

violence. People who are intoxicated have less impulse control, are easily

frustrated, have greater misunderstandings and are generally prone to resort to

violence as a solution to problems. Women who abuse men are frequently

alcoholics.

a.. Psychological Disorders. There are certain psychological problems,

primarily personality disorders, in which women are characteristically abusive

and violent toward men. Borderline personality disorder is a diagnosis that is

found almost exclusively with women. Approximately 1 to 2 percent of all women

have a Borderline Personality disorder. At least 50% of all domestic abuse and

violence against men is associated with woman who have a Borderline Personality

disorder. The disorder is also associated with suicidal behavior, severe mood

swings, lying, sexual problems and alcohol abuse.

a.. Unrealistic expectations, assumptions and conclusions. Women who are

abusive toward men usually have unrealistic expectations and make unrealistic

demands of men. These women will typically experience repeated episodes of

depression, anxiety, frustration and irritability which they attribute to a

man's behavior. In fact, their mental and emotional state is the result of their

own insecurities, emotional problems, trauma during childhood or even withdrawal

from alcohol.

A significant number of men are overly sensitive to emotional and psychological

abuse. In some cases, humiliating a man emotionally in front of other men can

be more devastating than physical abuse. Some professionals have observed that

mental and emotional abuse can be an area where women are often " brutal " than

men. Men on the other hand are quicker to resort to physical abuse and they are

more capable of physical assaults that are more brutal - even deadly!.

 

Sources:

www.wikipedia.org

http://www.survivingthememories.com/id67.html

 

 

Love and Peace?

Omar Ali