Elektra, , 17th Oct.

[Guest guest]

Dear people,

I don't know what exactly everyone is talking about Oct. 17th for,

but I just thought I'd share my day with you. I've been feeling very

emotional all day, with despair at my life and my behaviour, wishing

for change. Last night I meditated in lotus position for the first

time in a while, and I'm starting to feel stronger, or whould that be

softer, physically after doing a lot of qigong.

I just watched quite an intense film about the end of the oil age and

the end of the suburban american way of life which requires so much

oil. Also they focused on the lack of solutions, and said that the

wars in the middle east now are really just wars for the last scraps

of oil, and said that probably it will be global war for the rest of

our lifetime. this is probably not the sort of thing a K

awakening person should be watching! At least it is a heavy dose of

reality, it made me reflect on the endless suffering of samsara... I

felt that spirituality is really the only solution to all this war

and destruction.

I changed my degree program from Environmental Biology to Biology

today. Its my last year so doesnt make much of a difference, but I

felt the need to focus on what I'm good at rather than just what I

believe in. Another thing that happened today was that a friend of

mine sent me back a book on Environmental Architecture by Tadao Ando.

It has given me some ideas which I shall write down. It has inspired

me. I would love to find a future that actually improved upon the oil

age, rather than just being its collapse. I think as a species we can

have a wonderful future, but with a different focus. After all,

wasn;t the oil age just the age of the neurotic?

I think I am in denial about a lot of things.

Love and blessings,

James.