Guest guest Posted May 26, 2007 Report Share Posted May 26, 2007 How are you doing? - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 31, 2007 Report Share Posted May 31, 2007 Hi Chrism, Thanks for checking in. I am hangin in there. I am in less of an emergency state of being now, and more settled into the unknown and longevity of this process that I am in. It goes in waves. Sometimes I am still in intense states of agony and confiscation, sometimes dissassociated, sometimes strongly in the witness, and sometimes I am actually experiencing a moment or two of remembering what it feels like to just be me (miracle moment). I am still having a bi-dimensional life, with spirit beings...a whole world of them...somehow unified with my mind/nervous system - not much in the way of mental or emotional " privacy " . I draw strength from the safeties, and everything is about still about nourishment and grounding. Within the last week, there are new presences coming in to the " story " now that weren't there before. The " celestial " realm and the " arcturians " are helping. It seems even the beings that were more bent on attacking me are getting more on board on figuring out how to separate or help. This is much needed, things got really ugly for a long time. They seem to be in my psychic or consciousness space rather than on the outside, though I experience them both ways. Since this " opened " for me overnight in January, to put it positively, I am getting a full medical/neurological work up just to make sure this insane shamanic initiatory crisis has not stemmed from or resulted in anything organically wrong with my organs or brain...which should at hopefully put that to rest. Part of me just wants this process to be over, but I am counting my blessings in this process (even for credit cards and debt getting me the healing care I need, lol), and looking for every oportunity to relate to myself in a more loving and nourishing way. Well, thanks for asking. It means alot, Peace, Laura On 5/25/07, chrism <> wrote: > > How are you doing? - > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 1, 2007 Report Share Posted June 1, 2007 Good to read your doing a little bit better. Keep up your practice and understand that really there is nothing wrong with you from a physical standpoint minus what your condition has brought on. Be wary of SSRI's. In these areas and really in life on this physical dimension here, there is no privacy ever. Privacy is a figment of our consciousness and is not available. We are always being seen and observed by other consciousness. I would like you to look for the " blue eyes " see the picture on the scatterfield album in the photo section. They may also be of some help. Begin to look for your divinities your HIGH SELF and go to it and learn from her she can teach you much right now as you have come to a place of stability. The entities can ebb and flow with the volume and the direction of your flow and your acceptance of that flow. I am looking right now at your crown and do indeed see some evidence of difficulty and as part of the incursion am going to reverse some aspects of that difficulty. I do not know if you will feel this or not. You are very large Laura. Your radiance extends far away from you and you do want it to expand as funneling it into a restricted space now would only be painful. It is extra dimensional as you state and the more you can bring an influx of goodness and love and forgiveness and tolerance the stronger the radiant field will become. Many entities cannot stay with in a brilliant field. Those that do can be consumed by it. You are very powerful at this stage Laura and do not allow yourself to believe anything else because this is the truth. You will get to know certain groups and your interactions will stabilize as they are doing. This is all good. Your activation was quite strong. You went through many levels of existence and so of course those aspects of creation in those levels were able to join with the energy which is why you have so many extra travelers. As you continue to take control, those aspects of creation will continuously fall away. Like leaves in the fall. Part of your process is to learn about what has occurred and to take from the experience certain " tools " that will help you to better navigate these areas and perhaps to help others who may also have this kind of an awakening. - blessings Laura - chrism , " L K " <spacegypsie wrote: > > Hi Chrism, > > Thanks for checking in. I am hangin in there. I am in less of an emergency > state of being now, and more settled into the unknown and longevity of this > process that I am in. It goes in waves. Sometimes I am still in intense > states of agony and confiscation, sometimes dissassociated, sometimes > strongly in the witness, and sometimes I am actually experiencing a moment > or two of remembering what it feels like to just be me (miracle moment). > > I am still having a bi-dimensional life, with spirit beings...a whole world > of them...somehow unified with my mind/nervous system - not much in the way > of mental or emotional " privacy " . > > I draw strength from the safeties, and everything is about still about > nourishment and grounding. > > Within the last week, there are new presences coming in to the " story " now > that weren't there before. The " celestial " realm and the " arcturians " are > helping. It seems even the beings that were more bent on attacking me are > getting more on board on figuring out how to separate or help. This is much > needed, things got really ugly for a long time. > > They seem to be in my psychic or consciousness space rather than on the > outside, though I experience them both ways. > > Since this " opened " for me overnight in January, to put it positively, I am > getting a full medical/neurological work up just to make sure this insane > shamanic initiatory crisis has not stemmed from or resulted in anything > organically wrong with my organs or brain...which should at hopefully put > that to rest. > > Part of me just wants this process to be over, but I am counting my > blessings in this process (even for credit cards and debt getting me the > healing care I need, lol), and looking for every oportunity to relate to > myself in a more loving and nourishing way. > > Well, thanks for asking. > It means alot, > Peace, > Laura > > > > > On 5/25/07, chrism <> wrote: > > > > How are you doing? - > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 1, 2007 Report Share Posted June 1, 2007 Hi Laura, My name is Jeannette. I don't mean to intrude, but I really can't stand the thought of you suffering in any way. So I would like to try to share with you some practices which I use and which I hope and pray might help you. 1) Understand that everything you experience is created by your mind. And I mean everything. Nothing is real. Not this world or any other. 2) What you focus your mind on becomes your reality. So practice focusing on what you wish to experience. Focusing on your concept of joy, beauty, pure love, God, etc. is recommended, for this is what you will begin to experience. 3) Ignore anything that doesn't fit in with what you want to experience. Be determined not to take any shit from your mind. Take control of it and ignore any thoughts that take you from your vision of infinite beauty... 4) This infinite beauty is who you really are. ANY visions or experiences, no matter what reality, are not real. Behind all these visions and experiences (which are created by your mind) is the real you. It is gorgeous and divine. 5) The mind can play games because it wants to stay alive and in control. You must use your mind to destroy your mind and then you will experience true happiness. 6)It takes discipline and desire to gain control over the mind. Focus your willpower and keep bringing your mind back to the divine, or whatever you want to call it. Allow repetition of these concepts to sink in. Do whatever you have to do to let it sink in that you and the divine are the same. 7)Find something which inspires a feeling of deep joy or love in you and don't let go of that feeling. Know that it is a divine expression and let yourself fall in love with it. Don't ever let it go and it will take care of everything. You don't have to do a thing!! As you might gather, I'm a big believer in self mind control (carry overs from other lives)... I hope this doesn't sound too obnoxious. I apologize if it is. This is how I have set up my practice and it has worked for me since I was a child. I hope that it in some way helps you, because you are such a lovely person and your vulnerability is a true asset!...Very few people can be so open. This also means that when divine love enters your experience you will be soooo so blessed!!! This is my wish for you, yesterday, today and tomorrow. With much love, Jeannette , " L K " <spacegypsie wrote: > > Hi Chrism, > > Thanks for checking in. I am hangin in there. I am in less of an emergency > state of being now, and more settled into the unknown and longevity of this > process that I am in. It goes in waves. Sometimes I am still in intense > states of agony and confiscation, sometimes dissassociated, sometimes > strongly in the witness, and sometimes I am actually experiencing a moment > or two of remembering what it feels like to just be me (miracle moment). > > I am still having a bi-dimensional life, with spirit beings...a whole world > of them...somehow unified with my mind/nervous system - not much in the way > of mental or emotional " privacy " . > > I draw strength from the safeties, and everything is about still about > nourishment and grounding. > > Within the last week, there are new presences coming in to the " story " now > that weren't there before. The " celestial " realm and the " arcturians " are > helping. It seems even the beings that were more bent on attacking me are > getting more on board on figuring out how to separate or help. This is much > needed, things got really ugly for a long time. > > They seem to be in my psychic or consciousness space rather than on the > outside, though I experience them both ways. > > Since this " opened " for me overnight in January, to put it positively, I am > getting a full medical/neurological work up just to make sure this insane > shamanic initiatory crisis has not stemmed from or resulted in anything > organically wrong with my organs or brain...which should at hopefully put > that to rest. > > Part of me just wants this process to be over, but I am counting my > blessings in this process (even for credit cards and debt getting me the > healing care I need, lol), and looking for every oportunity to relate to > myself in a more loving and nourishing way. > > Well, thanks for asking. > It means alot, > Peace, > Laura > > > > > On 5/25/07, chrism <> wrote: > > > > How are you doing? - > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 22, 2007 Report Share Posted June 22, 2007 Dear & List, I have really been struggling again, and am reaching out in refuge. The " entities " or " beings " have attacked me so much for so long, I have been sick for several weeks, and also in a consistent level of chronic pain. I continue to surrendur, reach out for support, get physical contact to soothe my nervous system, eat roots, etc...I am trying to practice the safeties, though my whole self and body are worn down. I take care of myself, try to breathe, meditate with the discomfort, and they still act against, quite virulently. I recently got an MRI and EEG, as well as extensive blood work done, just to make sure there was nothing wrong with my physical body, and it came back normal. I feel my organs are all fine with the exception of my heart. The high levels of stress on my body have resulted in a frequent irregular heart beat (my thyroid is fine). My circuitry is really out of whack. I just ordered Magnesium Taurate to see if that will help, and am also going to go back to the doc and get my heart fully checked out so I can hopefully put my mind at ease. It seems like the entities continue to evolve new ways to attack my physical body, even when I am experiencing times of feeling healthy and safe with a strong remberance of my whole sense of self before the onset in January, and I don't have a good pain management strategy. I don't feel like my mind state is bringing on these attacks. I can deal with the emotional imbalances this is incurring, the dramatic swings of emotion as my spirit and body respond to being under attack...but I love myself deeply and don't want this process, whatever it is, to harm my physical body. I have tried fully standing up to them, harmonizing with them, ignoring them, staying true to my 32 prior years of experiencing wholeness of mind, body and spirit, it seems no matter what my emotional or mental relationship to them and to myself, they are still actively trying to kill or harm me. I really don't have a good understanding of what is happening to me, how to relate to it, or whether despite my self-care practices, I am moving in the right direction. I esp don't have a good understanding of how to relate to this world of " beings " which are constantly swarming me (I mean constant, like mosquitos to a moose). Even when I am standing in my power and can connect to my strong sense of self, they don't leave me alone. Anyway, I write to the list, since I am feeling lost at this point. I am not comfortable with becoming addicted to pain killers, I know the psychiatric drugs won't " cure " this/make it worse, so I keep turning to touch, nature, food, supplements, homeopathy, whatever is natural and soothing...but I need to make sure I am honoring the physical limits of my body to handle what I am going through, and would love any resources or responses to help me, my heart, get through this and especially out of attack. Thanks for listening, Peace, Laura Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 22, 2007 Report Share Posted June 22, 2007 Dear Laura, I'm really sorry to hear about what you are going through. I apologize that I have not ever experienced anything like what you are going through, and so I don't know that I am the most qualified to advise you. But I would like to try to help you if I can! I AM able to explain why I never have experienced this sort of thing. In a nutshell, some of it is karmic, and some of it is discipline of mind. I always try to do my practice of lovingkindness, compassion, forgiveness, humility...but especially every morning and evening, before going to sleep, I focus intently on communing with my teacher, or with God. I believe that what we focus on becomes our experience. If I experienced nightmarish entities, I would try to ignore them and focus my mind on an illumined one or go into a state of no mind. I think that when you are in the middle of a nightmare, it is difficult to wake up and remember that this, ultimately, is all a dream coming from the mind. I'm so sorry for your pain. I will send you lots of comforting love and pray that you will find a way to focus on God and be able to commune with the Divine again. Much love from the heart, Jeannette -- In , " L K " <spacegypsie wrote: > > Dear & List, > > I have really been struggling again, and am reaching out in refuge. > > The " entities " or " beings " have attacked me so much for so long, I have been > sick for several weeks, and also in a consistent level of chronic pain. I > continue to surrendur, reach out for support, get physical contact to soothe > my nervous system, eat roots, etc...I am trying to practice the safeties, > though my whole self and body are worn down. I take care of myself, try to > breathe, meditate with the discomfort, and they still act against, quite > virulently. > > I recently got an MRI and EEG, as well as extensive blood work done, just to > make sure there was nothing wrong with my physical body, and it came back > normal. I feel my organs are all fine with the exception of my heart. The > high levels of stress on my body have resulted in a frequent irregular heart > beat (my thyroid is fine). My circuitry is really out of whack. I just > ordered Magnesium Taurate to see if that will help, and am also going to go > back to the doc and get my heart fully checked out so I can hopefully put my > mind at ease. > > It seems like the entities continue to evolve new ways to attack my physical > body, even when I am experiencing times of feeling healthy and safe with a > strong remberance of my whole sense of self before the onset in January, and > I don't have a good pain management strategy. I don't feel like my mind > state is bringing on these attacks. > > I can deal with the emotional imbalances this is incurring, the dramatic > swings of emotion as my spirit and body respond to being under attack...but > I love myself deeply and don't want this process, whatever it is, to harm my > physical body. > > I have tried fully standing up to them, harmonizing with them, ignoring > them, staying true to my 32 prior years of experiencing wholeness of mind, > body and spirit, it seems no matter what my emotional or mental relationship > to them and to myself, they are still actively trying to kill or harm me. > > I really don't have a good understanding of what is happening to me, how to > relate to it, or whether despite my self-care practices, I am moving in the > right direction. I esp don't have a good understanding of how to relate to > this world of " beings " which are constantly swarming me (I mean constant, > like mosquitos to a moose). Even when I am standing in my power and can > connect to my strong sense of self, they don't leave me alone. > > Anyway, I write to the list, since I am feeling lost at this point. I am > not comfortable with becoming addicted to pain killers, I know the > psychiatric drugs won't " cure " this/make it worse, so I keep turning to > touch, nature, food, supplements, homeopathy, whatever is natural and > soothing...but I need to make sure I am honoring the physical limits of my > body to handle what I am going through, and would love any resources or > responses to help me, my heart, get through this and especially out of > attack. > > Thanks for listening, > Peace, > Laura > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 23, 2007 Report Share Posted June 23, 2007 Hello Laura, So the " Essene Prayer " didnt work? Or it did for a while and then stopped working? The incursion didnt work as well and now you are back to square one. Yes? Is this the current condition? - , " L K " <spacegypsie wrote: > > Dear & List, > > I have really been struggling again, and am reaching out in refuge. > > The " entities " or " beings " have attacked me so much for so long, I have been > sick for several weeks, and also in a consistent level of chronic pain. I > continue to surrendur, reach out for support, get physical contact to soothe > my nervous system, eat roots, etc...I am trying to practice the safeties, > though my whole self and body are worn down. I take care of myself, try to > breathe, meditate with the discomfort, and they still act against, quite > virulently. > > I recently got an MRI and EEG, as well as extensive blood work done, just to > make sure there was nothing wrong with my physical body, and it came back > normal. I feel my organs are all fine with the exception of my heart. The > high levels of stress on my body have resulted in a frequent irregular heart > beat (my thyroid is fine). My circuitry is really out of whack. I just > ordered Magnesium Taurate to see if that will help, and am also going to go > back to the doc and get my heart fully checked out so I can hopefully put my > mind at ease. > > It seems like the entities continue to evolve new ways to attack my physical > body, even when I am experiencing times of feeling healthy and safe with a > strong remberance of my whole sense of self before the onset in January, and > I don't have a good pain management strategy. I don't feel like my mind > state is bringing on these attacks. > > I can deal with the emotional imbalances this is incurring, the dramatic > swings of emotion as my spirit and body respond to being under attack...but > I love myself deeply and don't want this process, whatever it is, to harm my > physical body. > > I have tried fully standing up to them, harmonizing with them, ignoring > them, staying true to my 32 prior years of experiencing wholeness of mind, > body and spirit, it seems no matter what my emotional or mental relationship > to them and to myself, they are still actively trying to kill or harm me. > > I really don't have a good understanding of what is happening to me, how to > relate to it, or whether despite my self-care practices, I am moving in the > right direction. I esp don't have a good understanding of how to relate to > this world of " beings " which are constantly swarming me (I mean constant, > like mosquitos to a moose). Even when I am standing in my power and can > connect to my strong sense of self, they don't leave me alone. > > Anyway, I write to the list, since I am feeling lost at this point. I am > not comfortable with becoming addicted to pain killers, I know the > psychiatric drugs won't " cure " this/make it worse, so I keep turning to > touch, nature, food, supplements, homeopathy, whatever is natural and > soothing...but I need to make sure I am honoring the physical limits of my > body to handle what I am going through, and would love any resources or > responses to help me, my heart, get through this and especially out of > attack. > > Thanks for listening, > Peace, > Laura > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 23, 2007 Report Share Posted June 23, 2007 Hi Chrism, Yes, the " essene prayer " was soothing to me, but it never worked on the beings. The incursion, like almost all of my healing work, they seemed to be able to dismantle (the scatterfield). I am at square one in many ways, I went through a weak spell for a couple weeks, but my strength of intention/will to live, and willingness to listen to my body as best I can and keep grounding...these are all very strong - and stronger than before. The square one is the amount of invasion, the attacks, and the Beings are constantly monitoring, hearing, interacting with me and don't seem to know how to stop. Thanks, Laura On 6/22/07, chrism <> wrote: > > Hello Laura, > So the " Essene Prayer " didnt work? Or it did for a while > and then stopped working? The incursion didnt work as well and now > you are back to square one. Yes? Is this the current condition? - > > > --- In <%40ya\ hoogroups.com>, > " L K " > <spacegypsie wrote: > > > > Dear & List, > > > > I have really been struggling again, and am reaching out in refuge. > > > > The " entities " or " beings " have attacked me so much for so long, I > have been > > sick for several weeks, and also in a consistent level of chronic > pain. I > > continue to surrendur, reach out for support, get physical contact > to soothe > > my nervous system, eat roots, etc...I am trying to practice the > safeties, > > though my whole self and body are worn down. I take care of > myself, try to > > breathe, meditate with the discomfort, and they still act against, > quite > > virulently. > > > > I recently got an MRI and EEG, as well as extensive blood work > done, just to > > make sure there was nothing wrong with my physical body, and it > came back > > normal. I feel my organs are all fine with the exception of my > heart. The > > high levels of stress on my body have resulted in a frequent > irregular heart > > beat (my thyroid is fine). My circuitry is really out of whack. > I just > > ordered Magnesium Taurate to see if that will help, and am also > going to go > > back to the doc and get my heart fully checked out so I can > hopefully put my > > mind at ease. > > > > It seems like the entities continue to evolve new ways to attack > my physical > > body, even when I am experiencing times of feeling healthy and > safe with a > > strong remberance of my whole sense of self before the onset in > January, and > > I don't have a good pain management strategy. I don't feel like > my mind > > state is bringing on these attacks. > > > > I can deal with the emotional imbalances this is incurring, the > dramatic > > swings of emotion as my spirit and body respond to being under > attack...but > > I love myself deeply and don't want this process, whatever it is, > to harm my > > physical body. > > > > I have tried fully standing up to them, harmonizing with them, > ignoring > > them, staying true to my 32 prior years of experiencing wholeness > of mind, > > body and spirit, it seems no matter what my emotional or mental > relationship > > to them and to myself, they are still actively trying to kill or > harm me. > > > > I really don't have a good understanding of what is happening to > me, how to > > relate to it, or whether despite my self-care practices, I am > moving in the > > right direction. I esp don't have a good understanding of how to > relate to > > this world of " beings " which are constantly swarming me (I mean > constant, > > like mosquitos to a moose). Even when I am standing in my power > and can > > connect to my strong sense of self, they don't leave me alone. > > > > Anyway, I write to the list, since I am feeling lost at this > point. I am > > not comfortable with becoming addicted to pain killers, I know the > > psychiatric drugs won't " cure " this/make it worse, so I keep > turning to > > touch, nature, food, supplements, homeopathy, whatever is natural > and > > soothing...but I need to make sure I am honoring the physical > limits of my > > body to handle what I am going through, and would love any > resources or > > responses to help me, my heart, get through this and especially > out of > > attack. > > > > Thanks for listening, > > Peace, > > Laura > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 23, 2007 Report Share Posted June 23, 2007 " interacting with me and don't seem to know how to stop. " This is interesting. It would seem that as you are thrust into this enivronment (thiers) that they have no recourse but to attach or communicate. So it is a matter of you pulling your energy or energetic configuration into a different pattern. - just a thought - chrism Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 23, 2007 Report Share Posted June 23, 2007 Laura stick with ''us'' all, follow Chrism's advise. Great great strength to you. Igor. : spacegypsie: Sat, 23 Jun 2007 01:11:09 -0800Re: Re: Laura Hi Chrism,Yes, the " essene prayer " was soothing to me, but it never worked on thebeings. The incursion, like almost all of my healing work, they seemed tobe able to dismantle (the scatterfield).I am at square one in many ways, I went through a weak spell for a coupleweeks, but my strength of intention/will to live, and willingness to listento my body as best I can and keep grounding...these are all very strong -and stronger than before.The square one is the amount of invasion, the attacks, and the Beings areconstantly monitoring, hearing, interacting with me and don't seem to knowhow to stop.Thanks,LauraOn 6/22/07, chrism <> wrote:>> Hello Laura,> So the " Essene Prayer " didnt work? Or it did for a while> and then stopped working? The incursion didnt work as well and now> you are back to square one. Yes? Is this the current condition? -> >> --- In <%40ya\ hoogroups.com>,> " L K " > <spacegypsie wrote:> >> > Dear & List,> >> > I have really been struggling again, and am reaching out in refuge.> >> > The " entities " or " beings " have attacked me so much for so long, I> have been> > sick for several weeks, and also in a consistent level of chronic> pain. I> > continue to surrendur, reach out for support, get physical contact> to soothe> > my nervous system, eat roots, etc...I am trying to practice the> safeties,> > though my whole self and body are worn down. I take care of> myself, try to> > breathe, meditate with the discomfort, and they still act against,> quite> > virulently.> >> > I recently got an MRI and EEG, as well as extensive blood work> done, just to> > make sure there was nothing wrong with my physical body, and it> came back> > normal. I feel my organs are all fine with the exception of my> heart. The> > high levels of stress on my body have resulted in a frequent> irregular heart> > beat (my thyroid is fine). My circuitry is really out of whack.> I just> > ordered Magnesium Taurate to see if that will help, and am also> going to go> > back to the doc and get my heart fully checked out so I can> hopefully put my> > mind at ease.> >> > It seems like the entities continue to evolve new ways to attack> my physical> > body, even when I am experiencing times of feeling healthy and> safe with a> > strong remberance of my whole sense of self before the onset in> January, and> > I don't have a good pain management strategy. I don't feel like> my mind> > state is bringing on these attacks.> >> > I can deal with the emotional imbalances this is incurring, the> dramatic> > swings of emotion as my spirit and body respond to being under> attack...but> > I love myself deeply and don't want this process, whatever it is,> to harm my> > physical body.> >> > I have tried fully standing up to them, harmonizing with them,> ignoring> > them, staying true to my 32 prior years of experiencing wholeness> of mind,> > body and spirit, it seems no matter what my emotional or mental> relationship> > to them and to myself, they are still actively trying to kill or> harm me.> >> > I really don't have a good understanding of what is happening to> me, how to> > relate to it, or whether despite my self-care practices, I am> moving in the> > right direction. I esp don't have a good understanding of how to> relate to> > this world of " beings " which are constantly swarming me (I mean> constant,> > like mosquitos to a moose). Even when I am standing in my power> and can> > connect to my strong sense of self, they don't leave me alone.> >> > Anyway, I write to the list, since I am feeling lost at this> point. I am> > not comfortable with becoming addicted to pain killers, I know the> > psychiatric drugs won't " cure " this/make it worse, so I keep> turning to> > touch, nature, food, supplements, homeopathy, whatever is natural> and> > soothing...but I need to make sure I am honoring the physical> limits of my> > body to handle what I am going through, and would love any> resources or> > responses to help me, my heart, get through this and especially> out of> > attack.> >> > Thanks for listening,> > Peace,> > Laura> >> >> > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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