A Little About Me

October 3, 2007

Claudia was kind enough to send me this post from the other day since I

just missed it. I have to say I am fascinated, and many things described

in this piece are very familiar to me, and I have also read that the

more you learn, or want to know, the more that will open up to you. When

I joined a few Near death experience groups, some of the posts really

rang true within me; most of them actually. Ive met a lot of amazing

people with experiences that they are willing to share. Just in that

time, probably April of this year, so much has opened up to me. Ive

learned to live more in the " now " , Ive been aware of everything around

me, when most seem to disregard their surroundings, Ive learned to quiet

my mind, Ive exceeded my visualization skills, my dream recall, and my

understanding of our true selves and of our egos and how they are a tool

used to utilize the world around us, but are not supposed to rule us.

In that time, I have had interesting visions (and I saw that in terms of

visualizations I get within my mind and inside of my eyelids), I have

seen spots of light spontaneously flash (Ive recently had an extensive

eye episode meaning Ive gone to a specialist because one eyeglass doctor

thought my optic nerves looked enlarged, everything is fine though),

within the last few days, Ive seen these spots flash and move. Its all

very quick and I can never catch it dead on.

Ive been able to kinda zone out or completely relax my body and hear

snippets of conversation, laughter, bells, or a windy sound. Its as if

my physical hearing silences out the noise or empty air around me, and

plays its own noise somewhere in my mind. I remember having these

experiences when I was maybe 3 or less years old, when my mother would

put me down for a nap. Sometimes the voice is familiar, or not.

Sometimes they make sense, but do not seem to mean much, and sometimes

its gibberish. I have always been fascinated by the healing power within

us all, the mind/body connection, the healing power of touch. Ive been

interested in " the paranormal " since I was 8 or 9 years old. I am now 27

on the 10th of this month.

I would have never dreamed of likening it to enlightenment or spiritual

awakening, but at the end of last year and the beginning of this one, I

suddenly became overwhelmed with anxiety, panic attacks, butterflies in

my stomach, intense nervoucness, adrenaline rushes, period of extreme

hot and cold within a small amount of time, something that felt like

cold electric charges going up and down my arms and legs. Obsessive

worry... IBS-like symptoms due to the anxiety, and complete loss of

appetite. It was awful, and do not know what triggered it, as nothing

even had to be wrong. I did lose my ex boyfriend two years ago of a drug

overdose, and I was starting to think that perhaps suppressed grief was

causing this. I have since sought out a psychiatrist and have that under

control. I do not use tranquilizers, however. I have also been afflicted

with unexplained, horrible neck pain since I turned 26, it seems like. I

thought it was due to the way I slept and it would subside, but then it

started happening with a simple turn of the head while awake. These

usually last for a few days, and sometimes happen one after another.

Wow, how I have blabbed on, but perhaps beginning in April, I became

active in and just being able to discuss these things is so

much more helpful, and it seems rare when one meets folks in their lives

they can connect on these things with. Since that time, I have felt so

much more understanding, and non-judgmental. I have lost a considerable

amount of my death anxiety/fear of my own mortality and what it feels

like to die. I feel like I have grown so much in the spiritual sense.

A lot of what I mentioned above can describe so much more, such as

physical illness, mental illness, or just my imagination, but since

reading this article, I have been inspired to share this with you all. I

am always asking questions, and seeking answers and opinions.

I look forward to learning more. I will also be uploading a photo of

myself in the picture section so you folks and put a face with the name.

Amanda

, " chrism "

<> wrote:

>

> What is Kundalini?

>

> Kundalini is a subtle energy and consciousness that is said (in

> Yogic and Tantric scriptures) to be coiled at the base of the spine

> 3 1/2 times, holding our system in stasis during our lives. If it

> uncoils and awakens, either through spiritual practices, breathing

> practices, near-death experiences or by other means, it moves upward

> through the sushumna, a subtle energy field which follows the spine,

> opening chakras and brain centers and changing the way the body

> feels and the quality of awareness. This upward movement may be

> sudden or it may be gradual over weeks and months and even years or

> lifetimes. This awakening is also acknowledged under other names in

> many other spiritual traditions, including Taoism, Tantric Buddhism,

> Gnostic mystical traditions, and some Native American practices. In

> some cases the energy awakening flows through channels other than

> sushumna, triggering a wide range of phenomena, either positive or

> negative.

>

> Kundalini awakening brings about great changes in the psyche, the

> body and the spiritual capacity of the one who experiences it.

> Depending on the intensity of the experience, and the channels

> through which it moves in our bodies, many phenomena may occur. The

> person who has a sudden awakening needs a context and understanding

> of this experience, because it may cause an eruption of energy

> (involuntary movements, jerking, vibrations), psychic phenomena

> (precognition, visions, inner sounds), altered states of

> consciousness (out-of-body experience, other-life recall, states of

> ecstasy or unitive consciousness or a sense of a void -- a sense of

> limitlessness), psychological difficulties, and many physical

> manifestations (heat, energy problems, eating and sleeping

> difficulties, heart sensations, pains, stomach problems and other

> conditions.)

>

> Kundalini awakening offers a profound opportunity for those who are

> called to follow a spiritual path. It can also lead to sudden

> expansion of creativity and intelligence, emotional depth, and a

> call to service in the world. Ultimately it is an invitation to

> release all the patterns and delusions about your personal identity

> and realize the essence of your existence, or the Self (also known

> as the non-Self in Buddhist traditions.) Because everyone enters

> this process with a unique history and set of habits and beliefs,

> there can be much variation in how we adjust to the changes and the

> insights that follow a spiritual awakening. It is threatening to the

> ego-structure and frightening for many to feel a loss of boundaries,

> or experience a fragmenting of the sense of personal control. But

> the energy and consciousness that awakens in us can lead us directly

> into a profound understanding of who we are, when it is well

> supported. Ultimately life becomes more open and free, more

> acceptable as it is, more loving and compassionate. You become

> grounded in the Truth.

>

> Like any energy of creation (prana, electricity, atoms) this energy

> can be activated and misused by people who seek only power and do

> not follow a spiritual motivation. Many teachers with activated

> kundalini energy have not reached the full potential of this

> process, and are therefore not free of personal drives and negative

> intentions. You can recognize a teacher who has completed this path

> successfully by the measure of understanding, wisdom, love and

> selfless service they demonstrate. A fully awakened teacher has no

> hunger for personal gain or recognition and will always encourage

> you to honor the guru within. Such people's lives are marked by

> simplicity and presence.

>

> How Does Kundalini Awaken?

>

> The initial arising of kundalini energy is often part of some

> intense and concentrated experience This may be in a spiritual

> practice using energy manipulation, or meditation, but it also can

> happen in response to an intense challenge such as a near-death

> experience, a meeting with a teacher who has awakened energy, a

> beating or other traumatic event, a powerful sexual encounter, an

> overwhelming emotional experience, or extreme anxiety. In some cases

> it has awakened during childbirth. In others it seemed to awaken

> spontaneously, with no obvious cause, while sleeping at night, and

> even following an initiation in a dream.

>

> Kundalini is a sanscrit word for the primal energy of consciousness,

> and could be considered the life force. It is said by yogis to set

> the energy field of the subtle body and chakras into motion, and

> then curl 3 ½ times at the base of the spineand hold the body in

> stasis through our lives, until it unwinds and leaves the body at

> death.

>

> While it is coiled the energy we can feel flowing in our bodies is

> called prana, chi or ki in various eastern traditions, and sometimes

> bio-energy in the West. When the residual coiled energy unwinds as a

> result of spiritual practices it is called kundalini. Its function

> appears to be the deconstruction of the personal identity, and the

> clearing and restructuring of our interior space so that

> consciousness can flow more freely, without attaching to all the

> held patterns of our personal conditioning.

>

> Since as the energy arises we may experience many phenomena,

> (sometimes including the opening of abilities to heal, or psychic

> abilities, or the experience of bliss, or the freeing of the voice

> or creativity so we become more expressive in the world), some

> people have associated this energy with gaining powers, called

> siddhis in yoga and tantric traditions. But every tradition warns

> against becoming attached to any of these phenomena, saying it will

> deter us from the original function of the process, which is to

> bring us into self-realization.

>

> There are gradual schools of training in yogic and tantric

> traditions which use breathing, energy and concentration to prepare

> the body, balance the major energy flows in the body, strengthen the

> body organs, and in time, activate kundalini through specific

> practices. They generally require strict dietary rules, disciplined

> practice, a non-stressed and simple lifestyle, and often celibacy,

> in order to have optimum potential for this awakening to occur and

> progress smoothly. When this happens the gradual progression of the

> energy from the base of the spine through the crown chakra leads to

> a releasing of various contractions in the energy body, and finally

> to an experience of merging into unitive consciousness. Usually this

> is a temporary condition, and in time the person returns to their

> ordinary orientation, but always knowing themselves to be part of

> this unitive whole.

>

> People can also activate kundalini during or following an experience

> of self-realization. In the non-dual traditions such as Zen Buddhism

> or Advaita Vedanta, the teachings and the transmission of an

> awakened teacher are considered the method to awakening, rather than

> working with the energy field of the subtle body. Consciousness

> itself suddenly shifts from identification as the separate person,

> into a glimpse, or even a lengthy period of knowing itself as pure

> consciousness or awareness, without attachment to the body/mind or

> any other object. When the person returns to their ordinary

> orientation they may feel greatly changed, slightly disoriented, and

> may find new energy flows in their body that are unfamiliar and

> disarming. The clearing process in such cases happens after the

> initial awakening, preparing one in time for a permanent state of

> realization.

>

> If a student is with a teacher or mentor who has experienced this

> journey they may receive guidance that helps them make appropriate

> adjustments along the way, so that the changes they are experiencing

> are not so frightening. Simply having the context of a spiritual

> intention in one's life, and understanding that energy changes are

> part of this, can be an enormous support in the process.

>

> However, many people who have never known a practice or a teacher

> have spontaneous awakenings. These may occur in conditions related

> to trauma, body therapy, breathwork, deeply devoted prayer, yoga

> practices, martial arts, meditation programs that do not explain the

> phenomena of energy, metaphysical programs that manipulate

> consciousness, therapies that include deep penetration into

> alternate states of consciousness, recreational drug use, automobile

> accidents, and even intense biofeedback sessions. In a few cases it

> appears someone has had this energy awakened since birth, When

> unusual energy and consciousness shifts occur in someone who has no

> context for them it often raises anxiety, and this makes the process

> more contracted and uncomfortable. People may fear for their sanity

> and even their lives. Doctors frequently are unable to understand or

> diagnose this situation because it is out of the paradigm of their

> training. If during this process they continue to use recreational

> drugs, use alcohol, work long and stressful hours, have stressful

> relationships, or do more intense energy practices they may find the

> kundalini process is very uncomfortable, painful, and feels more

> like a punishment than a freedom. If they misinterpret the event as

> something that is dangerous or evil, or shouldn't be happening,

> their anxiety can greatly intensify the difficulties.

>

> There are many myths about spiritual awakening, the most difficult

> being that it should only happen to saintly people. This is clearly

> not the case. It is an interior phenomena of energy and

> consciousness that supports the realizing of our true nature, of our

> roots, and is a potential for all humans. Many great mystics and

> sages did not live exemplary lives before their awakening. It

> appears to happen both in those who have strong intention and in

> those who have never even heard of such a thing. It is as if the

> collective numinous consciousness itself finds a moment in which it

> can awaken our bodies and minds, and stimulate us to turn inward, in

> order to discover what we were before we took on all the roles and

> concepts and emotions of a human life, and what we are now,

> underneath all these garments of separate identity. To awaken all

> the way to the Truth is to know the source of our life, and directly

> feel it living through us. To reach this state the interior energies

> start to move in new ways, breaking old stuck patterns in our cells

> and our psyches, opening the belly and the heart to vulnerability

> and presence, opening the throat to new expression that is free of

> self-consciousness, and opening the mind to clarity and stillness.

> This takes some time, usually years, and this is why one is said to

> be in a kundalini process.

>

> 7 Categories of Phenomena Experienced in the Kundalini Process

>

> 1. Pranic Activity or Kriyas:

> These are intense involuntary body movements, shaking, vibrations,

> jerking, and the sensation of electricity, tingling, or rushes of

> energy flooding the body.

>

> 2. Yogic Phenomena:

> Body involuntary performs yogic postures (asanas) or hand movements

> (mudras) that the subject has never before seen, and the psyche may

> produce symbolic images, or the sound of chanting, Sanscrit words,

> tones or a variety of specific sounds such as bees buzzing, or

> kettle drums beating. Some people spontaneously create and enter

> into a ritual.

>

> 3. Physiological Problems:

> Activation of latent illness or pseudo illness, apparent heart

> problems, gastrointestinal disorders, nervous energy and hyper-

> activity, eating disorders, dramatic rushes of heat and cold, pains

> occurring in back, head, stomach, or big toes. These and other

> difficulties are atypical and usually prove difficult to diagnose

> and treat because they are not consistent with known illness and

> they come and go spontaneously.

>

> 4. Psychological and Emotional Upheavals:

> Intensification of unresolved psychological issues, fear of death or

> insanity, mood swings, overwhelming waves of anxiety, anger, guilt

> or depression which may feel unrelated to any personal issues, waves

> of compassion, unconditional love, and heightened sensitivity to the

> moods of others.

>

> 5. Extrasensory Experiences:

> Visual input (i.e. lights, symbols, images of entities, the

> reviewing of other lives, visions); auditory input (i.e. hearing a

> voice, music or phrase); or olfactory input (i.e. smelling

> sandlewood, perfume or incense).

>

> 6. Parapsychological Experiences:

> Psychic awareness, unusual synchronicities, healing abilities,

> seeing or feeling auras, channeling, electrical sensitivity and

> psychokinesis are the most commonly reported occult phenomena.

> Sometimes there is dramatically awakened creativity.

>

> 7. Samadhi or Satori Experiences:

> The absorption of consciousness into mystical states of unity,

> peace, light or energy, sometimes with a clear perception of

> existential truths; or a profound sense of I am that or This pure

> and open consciousness with no identity is what I truly am. There

> may be less intense levels of trance-like states which bring peace,

> joy, waves of bliss. These may occur during meditation, or after

> meditation, or spontaneously at other times.

>

> Please note: Any of these phenomena can occur independent of a

> kundalini awakening for various reasons. Particularly if there are

> intense physiological issues a medical evaluation should be made to

> rule out illness or neurological disorder. But if a person has had a

> dramatic initiating event of energy arising, and this is followed

> over time with experiences from several of these categories it is

> probably a kundalini process.

> Derived from Energies of Transformation: A Guide to the Kundalini

> Process.

>

> 10 Things You Can Do to Help Your Kundalini Process

>

> Kundalini awakening, whether it occurs within a traditional

> spiritual discipline or spontaneously, brings challenges for many

> people. It is as if your system has been amped up from 110 to 220

> wiring and you, as the appliance, have not yet adapted to it. It is

> exceedingly rare for an awakening to be complete before many months

> and years of clearing have occurred. This energy of life force,

> often depicted as a goddess, has a goal of bringing you to a

> complete rest in the universal Self, or the Non-self (not a personal

> self),or what has been called the peace that passeth understanding.

> As this happens the self-identifications, beliefs and illusions

> related to the existing personality are undermined and eventually

> dissolve. You may feel you no longer have a place to stand in the

> world. You are moving toward standing in the vastness of the whole.

>

> This clearing has been called a purification process, or in Hindu

> terms it is the release of samscaras and vrittis. Samscaras are all

> the conditions brought into this unique life to be played out from

> previous lives, but could also be considered the consequence of

> effects in the present life. Vrittis are all the movements of mind

> and thought, which pester us like flies buzzing in the house hoping

> to be made into pets. Many spiritual practices exist for the purpose

> of calming and overcoming the activity of vrittis.

>

> Because we are spirit imbedded in a physical body all of the cells

> of our bodies are like parts of a hologram, containing the memories

> of whatever has happened to us. So it happens that as the energies

> that hope to transform us move through the body any areas where

> energy, pain, memory or contractions are stored will react. This is

> what we are feeling when there are pains, jerking movements, heat,

> vibrations, rushes and other phenomena during and following a

> kundalini arising. Many people have associated some of these

> movements with opening the chakras, which is just another model for

> saying that as contraction releases new possibilities emerge. People

> carry their pain in different ways, just as we live our lives in

> different ways, and so there can be a wide variety of responses to

> this movement of energy, or clearing process. If there are physical

> problems from an old injury it may be especially sensitive. If our

> diet has been unhealthy or our lifestyle causes us to live where

> there is toxic emotional energy, this can leave us more vulnerable

> to difficulties. If there has been abuse of any kind, or there is a

> history of alcoholism or drug-use, the body may be especially

> challenged by this awakening, which is trying to clear it of the

> past memories and experiences that we are identified with. If there

> is a tendency of the personality to contract and a strong desire for

> control the process can be very difficult because of our resistance

> to it. There is an old saying that " What one resists, persists. "

>

> For these and other reasons these are a few guidelines that can help

> you move through this experience and find inner peace.

>

> 1. The energy may feel coarse and intense at times. But it is rarely

> painful. Usually it is the fear and the attempt to stop it that

> causes pain. If you are having lots of body movement, lay down once

> or twice a day on the bed, and invite the energy to move through you

> and clear out whatever doesn't belong to you, and whatever is in

> your best interest to release at that moment. Usually it will run

> for a few minutes -- maybe up to 20 -- and then stop, and you will

> feel more relaxed. You especially need to do this if you work in an

> environment where you may be picking up negative energy or the pain

> of others such as healing or therapeutic work, or in places where

> there is a lot of alcohol use, or in hospitals. If you are having

> persistent physical pain in this process you should have a medical

> evaluation.

>

> 2. Discover what your body really wants to eat. Often people need to

> make major dietary changes such as giving up alcohol and

> recreational drug use, avoiding red meat, eating smaller and more

> simple meals. If you have a persistent problem with kundalini do

> detective work to see what is happening when the problem arises. How

> long since you ate and what did you eat? Would a small piece of

> bread calm it down? Perhaps chamomile or burdock root tea? Do you

> need more protein? Yogis recommend sometimes a mix of warm milk with

> sugar in it (not honey, which raises heat). Another option is to

> have a good analysis done with an Ayurvedic practitioner, who can

> assess your body type and balance, and recommend the optimal diet

> and herbs for you. There is much variation in what people need to

> do, and sometimes people have long periods with no appetite at all,

> or long periods with a voracious appetite. Usually a diet focused on

> rice and vegetables is most useful, but proteins are also important.

> I tend not to eat much meat so I take a powdered protein and mineral

> supplement in juice every day and it makes a great difference in how

> I feel. Be good to yourself.

>

> 3. Focus more in the heart and the belly than in the head. Look for

> practices that center you more deeply into the present moment. A

> devotional practice such as chanting or doing a heart-centered

> meditation can help the energy open you to an experience of the

> deeper part of yourself, the eternal part, and can also help it move

> outward into more loving connections with others, or a tendency

> toward service or creative expression, all of which keeps the

> awakening more balanced. If you have a divine image ( a god,

> goddess, spiritual teacher, saint, symbol) that is comforting to you

> use it as an ally during this time, talking to him or her or it and

> asking for support, or bringing light around yourself. These are

> powerful archetypal energies that help the psyche when it is moving

> through challenging changes.

>

> 4. Do something to help your body be more open such as yoga, Tai

> Chi, dance, acupressure, movement processes, long walks in nature,

> or whatever you are drawn to. If you don't know what is best for you

> try several things and stick with what feels the best. The physical

> body is the vehicle that will carry and ground your spirit, your

> awakening, in the end. No better how deep your realization you will

> ultimately be living in a human body for a few more years. The

> better it is cared for the more options you have to express

> realization when it occurs. Of course, a person who is weak or dying

> can also be a beautiful and complete expression of the Divine, and

> poor health does not preclude enlightenment. Those who have set with

> people who are dying have seen that as attachment to the body lets

> go more and more light shines through. But this should not be

> misconstrued to advocate a harsh ascetism. While we are living,

> having an open and flexible body accomplishes the same thing with a

> lot less pain and distraction. Making the body " disciplined " by over-

> doing exercise is not of any use either. Find a middle way, where

> your body is in harmony with your spirit.

>

> 5. Wake up each day expecting not to know what will happen, and

> looking with curiosity for the events to unfold. Instead of worrying

> and controlling, simply be present to whatever arises with the

> intention of meeting it with your best effort. Whatever happens in

> the process of spiritual awakening will be unpredictable and will

> move on, if you are simply the one noticing it, and not doing battle

> or making a big project out of it.

>

> 6. You may have emotional swings, energetic swings, psychic

> openings, and other undesired shifts that feel unfamiliar to your

> personality as you knew it. Be the observer. Don't feel you have to

> fix or change anything. It will pass.

>

> 7. If you have serious trauma in your history and have never had

> therapy it could be very useful in releasing the pains of the

> memories that come up around the events. I have noticed that people

> who had good therapy before their spiritual awakenings often have

> much less difficulty. Therapy teaches you to express, to witness, to

> release and to move on. Your therapist does not have to know much

> about kundalini as long as he or she does not discount that part of

> your process. What you want to focus on is releasing issues related

> to the trauma, and you want a therapist that is experienced and

> compassionate and sees your spiritual orientation as a motivation

> and a support for the process of healing.

>

> 8. This process is your opportunity to wake up to your true nature.

> Some people wake up first, and then experience a kundalini arising;

> others have the kundalini process moving through as a preparation

> for the arising. The arising occurs to do the clearing out work so

> is part of either model. Waking up means the realization that the

> one who is looking through your eyes, living through your senses,

> hearing your thoughts and being present in every moment of your

> experience, good or bad, is recognized or remembered. This is a

> bright, aware detached and unconditionally loving presence that is

> universal and eternal and it is completely free of all the

> conditions and memories that you associate with as a personal

> identity. But as long as you believe in all your personal conditions

> and stories, emotions and thoughts, it has to experience life

> filtered through them. This conditioned mind is what brings variety

> and drama to the game of life, but it also causes suffering and fear

> of death. We glimpse the Truth about the deep expansive silence that

> is the ground of our being when we are in Samadhi and Satori

> experiences. The early Gnostics called it gnosis (knowledge) or the

> One. Some spiritual teachings such as Advaita Vedanta and Zen go

> directly for the realization, while others see it as a gradual path

> accomplished through years of spiritual practices. Either way the

> end is the same. When you know who you are the world becomes as

> Shakespeare said, a stage, and you the player, and life is more

> light and thoughts less intrusive, and the kundalini process settles

> down into a mellow pleasantness.

>

> 9. Give up going places and being with people who cause you pain.

> Sometimes people seem to be more acutely sensitive when kundalini

> arises. They can't tolerate the energy of large discount warehouses,

> or smoky nightclubs, or the kind of family gatherings that are tense

> and competitive. It's okay to take care of yourself and find more

> quiet time, more intimate friends, and even a new job, if the old

> one is overly stressful. Don't feel you have to prove anything by

> forcing yourself to be someone you aren't. Rediscover what is

> comfortable naturally for you to do and to be. Live more

> authentically. In this process you may also find a new creative

> urge, which is a wonderful opportunity to express what is happening.

> Draw, write, dance, work with clay, paint, garden -- all of these

> are great ways of nurturing yourself through the deep psychic

> changes you are experiencing.

>

> 10. Find an awakened teacher to hang out with. For many people with

> spiritual awakenings meditation is an intrinsic part of their lives.

> An awakened teacher will bring you a transmission of peace, and an

> opportunity to sit deeply in the silence of your true nature. An

> awakened teacher can be of any spiritual persuasion or none, can

> understand kundalini or not be interested in it, and will

> demonstrate tolerance and compassion for all who pass their way.

> When you learn from them the art of sitting and just being, you will

> find the cure for all the suffering of life. In time all the

> activity of the mind and complaints of the body fall away, and there

> is a deep understanding and love that arises, which brings a sense

> of completion, openness, freshness and invitation to the expression

> of the greater Self. When awakening is complete, there is no

> question it has been the whole purpose of your life. Where it will

> take you there is no way to know, and there is no one to care

> either. We surrender to the dance, knowing it is a dream.

>

October 4, 2007

Sounds like you're in the right place among kindred spirits, Amanda...if you

want to awaken your K, begin to become very intimate with 'the Safeties'...they

will serve you well on your journey, and without them you may find the road

quite rocky and dark. You will likely discover that they are just excellent

guidelines for 'right living'...amazing how something so simple could be so

powerful, hmmm? The forgivenesses may appear easy but they must be done with

brutal honesty and thoroughness...this is the area that trips people up most

often.

No worries, just practice the safeties!

Blessings & love to you,

Claudia

Amanda <mi5anthr0pe wrote:

Claudia was kind enough to send me this post from the other day since

I