update

[Guest guest]

Hey guys. I hope you don't mind me talking about this because I don't

know who else to talk about it with. It's like everyday something

different is happening and thats been gonig on for some time now, but

I bet you are all getting used to that somehow.

 

So for over a week I said that this intense feeling in my heart was

going on opening my heart chakra a lot and giving me non stop energy

even while sleeping. After so many days it just made my eyes water a

lot as well as numerous other things like the usual electric surges.

Well, after a while, I guess my body really wasn't used to this as

much (the bliss so you all call it) so I would wake up in the morning

upon sleeping around 7-8 hours, start making something to eat and

then I would just want to collapse on the kitchen floor and rest,

yet, I would be so wide awake and full of love because I just got out

of bed and I have so much energy from my heart or kundalini or prana

(whereever its coming from). Then not so long after wanting to do

this on the floor, I would then run around with my son playing games

with him as if I was child. I'd just keep switching like this just

because it seems to be overloading what my body is used to. Theres no

depression but I bet viewing from the outside I seemed a bit crazy.

 

On Thursday night something really out there happened. I remember I

was just doing the safeties because everything was getting more

intense then before. I then lied down and started meditating.

Suddenly (I know this is going to sound really weird but its

seriously how I felt), I just got this feeling like this wasn't my

body and even thought of weird things like, " these memories aren't my

own " . I dont know what that was all about but after that I started

hallucinating. Everything was all cloudy white and the sound around

me gotten a lot weirder then what I've experienced in the past few

months from the kundalini. I was freezing all of a sudden so I did

the safeties and was so thankful to have found this

kundaliniawakekningsystems1 website, my higher self must of hinted

the perfect time to find that site. It was a pretty psychedelic

experience for me, but too bad for me I'm a bit terrified of

psychedelics just because I did LSD a long time ago and I had OBE's

in random places/times without my control that seemed to have lasted

for several years when really it was only a few hours. I hope I'll

get over this fear soon and I hope I'll be fine.

 

On friday morning I had numerous feelings in my body. One was that it

felt like I was having drug withdrawls which almost feels like a

hollowness from the middle of the throat to the stomach, but its hard

to explain. It was really difficult to eat. I started feeling very

hot at times and for some reason I've been getting this feeling like

my upper back was crooked. I had to go to Toronto to visit my

boyfriend and I was pretty well in between somesort of dreamworld and

reality. I printed out the safeties and the tibetan rights and held

onto them for dear life. There were so many times in that day where I

seriously thought I was dreaming, because of this I was very outgoing

and acted differnt. It was cool and all but I was hanging out with

people who didn't understand what I was gonig through. Since then I

haven't been the same at all, I'm just really different now and I

can't really explain it. It's great, yet very unknown and I hope that

a lot of this sticks.

 

My sense of time is seriously gone now. My biological clock which

used to be fairly accurate has now disappeared. I've been late for so

many things because of this. I remember waking up and getting ready

for the morning thinking its 9 but then seeing that its only 4:11 on

the clock so I lie down for a bit then look at the clock again and it

somehow jumped to 6:03! I would then go back to sleep and then wake

up too late at around 12.... This is very unusual for me. I think I

just want to be sitting in the present, but I think I'm doing that

too much now lol and time is ticking causing me to just look at the

clock and go, " oh $^#@ its that time already!? " and then I rush

myself to get ready.

 

I love all of my experiences and lessons that I go through in my

life, but this is really hard. I'm not even saying everything here.

I'd really like to hear what you guys have to say about this. I feel

really weird sharing this just because I am usually one that figures

everything out on my own, but I think when it comes to stuff like

this we must all share each others experiences in hopes of connecting

better with ourselves and others by doing so.

 

Anyways, this is the best that I can handle for typing. I wanted to

type something earlier about this, but it was a bit hard for me to

type anything then. I usually talk a bit more on forums, but recently

a lot of things have been happening.... I hope I didn't over do this

post.

 

You all seem like a great crowd of people, I've enjoyed what I have

read from people here so far.

 

Much loves,

drea

 

ps *hugs*

 

, " Drea "

<lvledusa wrote:

>

> Hey, my name is Drea. I'm fairly ignorant to the Kundalini for I

had a

> spontaneous kundalini awakening just about 6 months ago without

> knowing a thing about it. I've had hard and delusional times, and

I've

> been able to pull myself through on my own, learn lessons on my own,

> etc... but I think its about time I start talking with others about

> the kundalini and making a better connection with others who have

had

> a KA.

>

> Anyways, I love the bliss, but it's just gotten pretty extreme,

> especially after clearing a certain block about a week ago. Before I

> had this block I had this bliss a lot, but nothing like how it is

now.

> For about a week my heart has just been exploding, it feels like my

> physical heart has doubled in size. This is really extreme, so

extreme

> that it goes all day, everyday, and even at night. I wake up in the

> morning and the first thing that catches my attention is my heart

and

> love for living here right now.

>

> It seems like this is absolutely fantastic, but it has been

> overwhelming to my ego. The other day, I had to go for a job

interview

> and I was a little scared that the manager would think I was on pure

> MDMA or something lol, but I just had to train myself to stop

thinking

> or worrying and to just let myself flow and relax. I did the

interview

> better then fine actually, I think I even raised the mood of the

> manager there.

>

> But I'm really wondering how you all are able to work in conditions

> like this? Does anyone have any suggestions for a situation like

this?

> Better yet, who else goes through this?... I guess one of my main

> issues is that I don't know anyone who experiences this.

>

> I've learned from the kundalini that theres two ways you can go

about

> getting over old patterns or getting introduced to new patterns:

>

> 1) You panic, you over think of the past, future, desires, worries,

> what you are used to, etc. allowing this rational mind to not take

it

> anymore resulting in hundreds of problems both physically and

mentally

> giving the end result to surrendering to the unknown and going

through

> a harsh ego death. or

>

> 2)You simply don't over think the situation but let yourself flow

into

> these new experiences and out of the old knowing that any pain that

> the mind has created is only an illusion... But this is easier said

> then done lol. I would lvoe to hear how people have worked around

this

> or were able to work like this.

>

> much love... lots of hearts ,

> Drea

>