So many issues!

[Guest guest]

I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a never

ending ball of string :-))

 

Loads of stuff about my brothers this time, abandonment issues, sexual issues

(of which I have many) in particular the feelings of sex being forced repeatedly

on me to the point where I no longer enjoyed it.

Self esteem issues, aliens abductions (I'm not sure how that fits in with

everything...LOL). JUST SO MUCH TO COVER in one shaktipat.

I'm knackered out..hee hee.

 

This is what spring cleaning is all about though so I'm very excited about

taking out my emotional garbage.

 

One question I have is how can we reprogramme our subconcious mind? I have

sexual issues deeply embedded in to my subconcious, if I continue to acknowledge

and surrender is that enough to clear? Or are there any exceercises anyone can

advice me on to help me out?

 

Many GREEN HEART DAY HUGGIES (even though the feeling of love has not kicked in

for me as of yet, more feelings of judgement and resentment and hurt)

Elektra x x x

 

 

 

________

Sent from Mail.

A Smarter Email http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html

[Guest guest]

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I've got so many issues that I

use to test teachers, paths, and therapists. I.e. if you can fix me

then you're ok. If not, I've chosen the wrong way, again. The thing

in me that opposes that is that I believe that we each come here with

the responsibility to handle a certain amount of crappy stuff so that

in time and lifetimes, things get clearer and happier and sparklier.

I try to dig in and clear up my own stuff, but I get distracted easily.

 

It all gets so confusing. I guess in writing this, it's practice for

telling it to and Sarita and all the other wonderful people

here. It's what I want to surrender.

 

Peter

 

 

, Elektra Fire

<elektra.fire wrote:

>

> I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a

never ending ball of string :-))

>

> Loads of stuff about my brothers this time, abandonment issues,

sexual issues (of which I have many) in particular the feelings of sex

being forced repeatedly on me to the point where I no longer enjoyed it.

> Self esteem issues, aliens abductions (I'm not sure how that fits in

with everything...LOL). JUST SO MUCH TO COVER in one shaktipat.

> I'm knackered out..hee hee.

>

> This is what spring cleaning is all about though so I'm very excited

about taking out my emotional garbage.

>

> One question I have is how can we reprogramme our subconcious mind?

I have sexual issues deeply embedded in to my subconcious, if I

continue to acknowledge and surrender is that enough to clear? Or are

there any exceercises anyone can advice me on to help me out?

>

> Many GREEN HEART DAY HUGGIES (even though the feeling of love has

not kicked in for me as of yet, more feelings of judgement and

resentment and hurt)

> Elektra x x x

>

>

>

> ________

> Sent from Mail.

> A Smarter Email http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html

>

[Guest guest]

Hey there Electra

 

It seems like the spring cleaning is common this round! I am going

through all sorts of issues related to the past this shaktipat - it

feels like a distillation process with the good being refined and the

old baggage being separated out for disposal coupled with a feeling of

the odd punch to the kidneys and lower back to boot - lol!!

 

blessings

 

Jonathan

 

, Elektra Fire

<elektra.fire wrote:

>

> I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a

never ending ball of string :-))

>

[Guest guest]

last night was tough.  dreams that were like watching movies. first one sad and

dark, dealing with my second marriage.  woke up, scared and exhausted. finally,

back to sleep, and sure enough, the first marriage showed up.  this one had

the new wife costarring.  she won the award for best supporting actress.  if i

had any doubts this was real, they are gone.  kind of limp this morning.  my

workday is less dealing with the public today, thank God.  hope everyone else is

well.  i am hanging on.  went to restorative class last night, and slept through

the last pose.  guess i needed it.......watermelon rehydrates my parched

body................

 

blessings,

Jullie

 

--- On Tue, 6/24/08, jonrow_2914 <jrowland wrote:

 

jonrow_2914 <jrowland

Re: So many issues!

 

Tuesday, June 24, 2008, 1:23 AM

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hey there Electra

 

It seems like the spring cleaning is common this round! I am going

through all sorts of issues related to the past this shaktipat - it

feels like a distillation process with the good being refined and the

old baggage being separated out for disposal coupled with a feeling of

the odd punch to the kidneys and lower back to boot - lol!!

 

blessings

 

Jonathan

 

Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , Elektra Fire

<elektra.fire@ ...> wrote:

>

> I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a

never ending ball of string :-))

>

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

HI Peter and Elektra, et al,

 

 

 

There was a time when I had more issues than I could count, years of them

built up, maybe lifetimes! I took a path (or was set upon a path rather)

that worked through each one (not that they are all gone lol) over a long

period of time. This is what is known in the Western Mysteries as the Great

Work.

 

 

 

Each chakra has patterns and expressions of patterns associated with it,

e.g. the heart and love, the second chakra and sex patterns, etc., and when

they are energized, so are the patterns with them. The big difference is,

rather than merely having things " happen " we learn to look at things with a

different eye, the Eye of Oneness of Being. The other is you, and

everything that has happened has happened in the Present. There is no past,

there is no future; they are but mental concepts. We learn to let go of

these things and live in the Living Present.

 

 

 

thomas

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

_____

 

 

On Behalf Of

peter.nichols

Tuesday, June 24, 2008 1:33 AM

 

Re: So many issues!

 

 

 

Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I've got so many issues that I

use to test teachers, paths, and therapists. I.e. if you can fix me

then you're ok. If not, I've chosen the wrong way, again. The thing

in me that opposes that is that I believe that we each come here with

the responsibility to handle a certain amount of crappy stuff so that

in time and lifetimes, things get clearer and happier and sparklier.

I try to dig in and clear up my own stuff, but I get distracted easily.

 

It all gets so confusing. I guess in writing this, it's practice for

telling it to and Sarita and all the other wonderful people

here. It's what I want to surrender.

 

Peter

 

Kundalini-Awakening

<%40>

-Systems-1 , Elektra Fire

<elektra.fire wrote:

>

> I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a

never ending ball of string :-))

>

> Loads of stuff about my brothers this time, abandonment issues,

sexual issues (of which I have many) in particular the feelings of sex

being forced repeatedly on me to the point where I no longer enjoyed it.

> Self esteem issues, aliens abductions (I'm not sure how that fits in

with everything...LOL). JUST SO MUCH TO COVER in one shaktipat.

> I'm knackered out..hee hee.

>

> This is what spring cleaning is all about though so I'm very excited

about taking out my emotional garbage.

>

> One question I have is how can we reprogramme our subconcious mind?

I have sexual issues deeply embedded in to my subconcious, if I

continue to acknowledge and surrender is that enough to clear? Or are

there any exceercises anyone can advice me on to help me out?

>

> Many GREEN HEART DAY HUGGIES (even though the feeling of love has

not kicked in for me as of yet, more feelings of judgement and

resentment and hurt)

> Elektra x x x

>

>

>

> ________

> Sent from Mail.

> A Smarter Email http://uk.docs. <http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html>

/nowyoucan.html

>

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

Thank you Thomas,

 

Boy that's a chunk! Let me think about that one for a while...

 

Peter

 

 

 

, " Thomas Brooks "

<magick41 wrote:

>

> HI Peter and Elektra, et al,

>

>

>

> There was a time when I had more issues than I could count, years of

them

> built up, maybe lifetimes! I took a path (or was set upon a path

rather)

> that worked through each one (not that they are all gone lol) over a

long

> period of time. This is what is known in the Western Mysteries as

the Great

> Work.

>

>

>

> Each chakra has patterns and expressions of patterns associated with it,

> e.g. the heart and love, the second chakra and sex patterns, etc.,

and when

> they are energized, so are the patterns with them. The big

difference is,

> rather than merely having things " happen " we learn to look at things

with a

> different eye, the Eye of Oneness of Being. The other is you, and

> everything that has happened has happened in the Present. There is

no past,

> there is no future; they are but mental concepts. We learn to let go of

> these things and live in the Living Present.

>

>

>

> thomas

>

_____

>

>

> On Behalf Of

> peter.nichols

> Tuesday, June 24, 2008 1:33 AM

>

> Re: So many issues!

>

>

>

> Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I've got so many issues that I

> use to test teachers, paths, and therapists. I.e. if you can fix me

> then you're ok. If not, I've chosen the wrong way, again. The thing

> in me that opposes that is that I believe that we each come here with

> the responsibility to handle a certain amount of crappy stuff so that

> in time and lifetimes, things get clearer and happier and sparklier.

> I try to dig in and clear up my own stuff, but I get distracted easily.

>

> It all gets so confusing. I guess in writing this, it's practice for

> telling it to and Sarita and all the other wonderful people

> here. It's what I want to surrender.

>

> Peter

>

> Kundalini-Awakening

> <%40>

> -Systems-1 , Elektra Fire

> <elektra.fire@> wrote:

> >

> > I never realised how many issues I still have to cover....WOW it's a

> never ending ball of string :-))

> >

> > Loads of stuff about my brothers this time, abandonment issues,

> sexual issues (of which I have many) in particular the feelings of sex

> being forced repeatedly on me to the point where I no longer enjoyed it.

> > Self esteem issues, aliens abductions (I'm not sure how that fits in

> with everything...LOL). JUST SO MUCH TO COVER in one shaktipat.

> > I'm knackered out..hee hee.

> >

> > This is what spring cleaning is all about though so I'm very excited

> about taking out my emotional garbage.

> >

> > One question I have is how can we reprogramme our subconcious mind?

> I have sexual issues deeply embedded in to my subconcious, if I

> continue to acknowledge and surrender is that enough to clear? Or are

> there any exceercises anyone can advice me on to help me out?

> >

> > Many GREEN HEART DAY HUGGIES (even though the feeling of love has

> not kicked in for me as of yet, more feelings of judgement and

> resentment and hurt)

> > Elektra x x x

> >

> >

> >

> > ________

> > Sent from Mail.

> > A Smarter Email http://uk.docs.

<http://uk.docs./nowyoucan.html>

> /nowyoucan.html

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Peter, Chrism, et al.

 

 

 

As mentioned, I have gathered a lot of knowledge over the years, an

intensive study, search. One might think that this knowledge is a huge

block, a big problem for me, but I don't think that is the main issue.

 

 

 

I think that what was behind that study is the real problem. It boils down

to the issue of 'worthiness'. As a child, and as a teenager, I had it

pounded into me, both literally and figuratively, that I am not worthy, that

I am a bad person, no good, etc, you know the drill. I spent the majority

of my life to date working to become 'worthy', pleasing to G-d, a good

person. It's strange how conditioned we are, how deeply seated it is.

Everything that is programmed in that deeply works automatically, not only

in behavior, but also as feelings, emotions, or maybe blocks of them.

 

 

 

I've had something like this before, not as complete, but much more intense,

way back in Feb 1975. I was so open, so open to everything, had such a

strong flow of energy. It was amazing, it was such a release, it was such a

realization that the spiritual world is real, and that there is such a thing

as unconditional love given.to ME. This went on for a time, but eventually

I had a questioning thought that was really my ego talking, and the flow was

very suddenly CUT OFF! No amount of begging or pleading or apologizing to

G-d had any effect, and I sank back further into misery than I had been

before, and began acting out my unworthiness too. Such a sad story.

 

 

 

I know it was merely the beginning of my journey, that I knew nothing, that

I was too young, and didn't know what I thought I knew. I know that now,

but I sensed it back then as well; I merely chose to ignore it. But the

main drive here was that I wanted it back! I now knew that I was not

pleasing to G-d, that I was unworthy, so I set about working on myself,

studying, searching for the answer. I didn't realize that I was merely

acting on the feeling that was the problem in the first place.

 

 

 

Anyway, I now have to tell myself that I am worthy of this blessing, worthy

merely due to the fact that G-d put me here on this earth at this time, and

because he proved it last year by letting me live when everyone else thought

I wouldn't make it, and then leading me to this shaktipat. I know that I

interpret things in my own way, but that is for me to the best level of my

understanding and my best insights to date.

 

 

 

I had been " Becoming Worthy " , but it is not about becoming, which is

thought, ego driven, but it is about Being what we already are. Now all I

have to do is put my money where my mouth is, so to speak.

 

 

 

Thomas

 

 

 

_____

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you Thomas,

 

 

Peter

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

At 01:13 PM 6/25/2008, you wrote:

>Everything that is programmed in that deeply works automatically, not only

>in behavior, but also as feelings, emotions, or maybe blocks of them.

 

Here are the questions I ask myself when I confront these feelings:

 

Is this serving me? Is it working for me somehow to feel unworthy?

Why are the opinions of people who are no longer in my life still important to

me?

Why do the opinions of people now, people who themselves are not feeling worthy,

matter to me?

 

Asking these questions is an interesting experience. If you can't answer the

first question, I recommend Caroline Myss's book " Why People Don't Heal " . I

haven't seen her in person but her books and tapes are spectacular. For dealing

with the others, I recommend a book by James Roswell Quinn called " Controlling

Others for Love and Profit " . Don't be thrown off by the title <g> ... it was a

bit of a " Bait and Switch " if you grasp my meaning. He is a facilitator for the

LifeStream seminar - taking that class was the best thing I've done for my

self-esteem.

 

Brandi