New to the Group

[Guest guest]

Hello to all, my name is Maritza and I have been meditating and

being on the spiritual and inner healing for about a year and a half

now. I pretty much started to do them on my own because my father

was diagnosed with a terminal illness and that was the ONLY way to

find peace and to see it through. I have been meditating with the

meditations that Kelly Howell offers and I came accross the

Kundalini Awakening and of course, I didn't make anything of it

except that it stated that I would:

-Increase health and vitality

-Recharge and refresh your brain

-Obtain greater clarity and insight

-Expand creativity and intuition

So, I bought it and tried it (this was on a Monday) but 5 days after

I had started to meditate (Saturday) I had an out of body experience

(like a trance) with my inner child. I was saying ALL KINDS of

things of rage, anger fustration, loneliness, abandonment that I had

repressed deep inside me but they weren't deep inside me anymore. I

went through forcing to vomit to dragging myself on the floor,

through crying like a child, through having a temper tantrum as a

child too and to letting out all of these things (verbally out loud)

that only I knew had happened in my life. I kicked, hit, cried,

yelled and screamed all of those feelings out. My energy was going

everywhere, I felt it coming and going through my body like forces

that I couldn't hold back. That's when I realized that this wasn't

normal that I had to read up on it, and low and behold, to my

surprise this is something beyond myself. I opened up a can of

worms that undoubtedly I had NO KNOWLEGE of. When I started to read

all of the symptoms and the process I literally fell into a I'm not

going to resist it because it says not to, but I was not ready for

this awakening. I've been since then, trying to do let the process

pass through me with respect and reverence with the only faith that

I know that there is no turning back and that God will see me

through it.

 

My upbringing is Catholic but ever since I started through my

spiritual journey I pretty much do not denominate my religiious

background. I am a firm believer in God and I believe that God sent

Jesus to die for our us to save us from our sins. Well, my partner

is acting like it really isn't happening....like I'll get through it

soon enough and it will all be over with. I try to describe what is

happening to me and it's just not connecting like not listening to

me. So, that is difficult.

 

I have 4 kids, they are 1 girl and 3 boys...their ages are 23, 21,

19 and 14. They really haven't noticed any of my symptoms because I

pretty much keep myself in my bedroom when I'm going through

anything. But, I did find someONE who adviced me to heal with " love "

so each time I felt any kind of symptoms coming on, I would just

say " I heal with love, not with pain " . I've turned my life around

by practicing the safeties---I do yoga, meditate, belly dancing and

also work out at the gym. I have found that through love you can

actually accomplish anything in life...and be happy and content

about it, not sad and desperate like I felt at the beginning.

 

Hope my story doesn't bore you...just an introduction. Glad to know

that there are alot of people out there that are like me. I'm open

to suggestions and learning so I'm glad that I joined the group.

 

Maritza