Service and Surrender

[Guest guest]

It keeps coming to me how much time I spend drifting in fantasies of

the future based on my experience of the past. It happened again last

weekend, as I fell into memories of my past in Africa and a mild

sense of despair feeling I was unable to live the experiences that

would allow me to repeat that happiness of the wild.

 

I notice it again today; I notice how I get lost in wanting, I notice

how I contract and hold on and reject this miracle of life that is

occurring right her, right now, always right now. The secret is to

notice that, to notice the contraction, to notice the despair, to

release, again and again, into the expansive embrace of this moment.

 

I am not this.

I am not this.

 

This is the secret of freedom; the key is to unlock the gate.

Release. Stop attaching to the world of form, and let go, let go, and

then there is freedom. You cant really `stop' though, as that is an

effort. All you can do is allow yourself to effortlessly notice what

is arising, and soon the release happens naturally. What does it mean

to open fresh to the new? What does it mean to live a life not bound

by the history of the past. What does it mean to open to the miracle

of possibility, again and again, without precondition?

 

K. forces me to let go. If I hold on, it gets too painful to fast and

the only solution is to let whatever arises to be there, and then to

have confidance that through awareness, the self-grasping will be

released. It really kicked in again for me what surrender means. For

me, surrender means deeply allowing whatever arises (in thoughts,

feelings, impulses and sensations )to be there, and then offering,

without agenda, that arising to my higher self. I keep opening, and I

keep releasing. The sister of surrender is service; with service,

there is a release, an opening to the other, a giving out from

fullness. I hold an intentionality for that service, one that carries

embedded within it love, laughter, humor and wisdom.

 

My practice the last few days has been relaxing, and breathing out

positive energy to all around me, again and again. This has opened me

up to the flow and to beauty again.

I have no option to explore the past. My only choice is a new future,

underpinned by unconditional freedom. Its quite a fun ride, learning

to live a new way

 

love

Bruce