Guest guest Posted January 27, 2009 Report Share Posted January 27, 2009 Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of the ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new person! - blessings Iona. - chrism , iona winton <ionaskydancer wrote: Yesterday I had a day similar to a few others on the list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2009 Report Share Posted January 29, 2009 Hi Chrism, I found your answer very interesting but it only led me to more questions regarding the ego and suicide. Many people at one time or another consider suicide/self-destruction, and many people carry it out successfully. I know of two friends and one past lover who died this way. I can believe my lovers reason was because of ego as he was an artist and suffering from arthritis. He could he longer paint without pain in his hands and he could not get out and about to places of beauty and inspiration as he used to. For him there was no reason to live if he could no longer paint. I tried twice but was saved and my reasons were due to not seeing my children for 13yrs and the abuse I had suffered at the hands of my ex- husband. Am I therefore to believe that my ego was driving my thoughts and not despair, as I had believed? I have my children back and have forgiven my ex, and I would never consider self-destruction again. I love life and see a future even when I am in pain. Are these feelings of self-destruction due to the ego wishing for things to remain the same and not wanting change even if it means the body and mind will still be intact but facing life differently? If this is the reason then the ego has a stronger hold over our bodies and minds than I ever thought possible. Scary!! Blessings, Skydancer x , " chrism " <> wrote: > > Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of the > ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new person! - > blessings Iona. - chrism > > , iona winton > <ionaskydancer@> wrote: > Yesterday I had a day similar to a few others on the list. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2009 Report Share Posted January 29, 2009 As Kundalini begins the transformation upon and within the person the ego will often resist these changes. This is where many of the emotional and mental problems begin. The ego can actually feel as if it is dying. This can translate into a feeling of demise or self destruction when in fact it is the changes being gifted that are changing the status quo. The ego can fear these changes and inside of the fear a worst case scenario feeling can be fabricated. So one can realize this when inside of these feelings. One can from a place of care and tenderness assure our inner child that all is indeed well and no worries need be raised. - , " Skydancer " <ionaskydancer wrote: Hi I found your answer very interesting but it only led me to more questions regarding the ego and suicide. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2009 Report Share Posted January 29, 2009 Iona,I will reply to this with Ms. Paula in mind. She will understand. As a cancer survivor at the age of 19, I often ruminate about those who would willingly take or think about taking their own life. When you are given a death sentence, your only thought is "to live", "to live every moment", to not understand those who have the choice to live, and choose to think about ending something as wonderful as the sky, the waters, the mountains, the beaches, the oceans, the trees, the forests, the PEOPLE, the animals, the flowers, the RAIN, the snow, the GRAPES, the watermelon, the love, the hope, the connection, the flame, the stars, the sun, the moon, the clouds, the birds.............can i go on? absolutely...........ask me.......namasteJulie--- On Thu, 1/29/09, Skydancer <ionaskydancer wrote:Skydancer <ionaskydancer Re: "Feeling Good" - Iona Date: Thursday, January 29, 2009, 6:23 PM Hi Chrism, I found your answer very interesting but it only led me to more questions regarding the ego and suicide. Many people at one time or another consider suicide/self- destruction, and many people carry it out successfully. I know of two friends and one past lover who died this way. I can believe my lovers reason was because of ego as he was an artist and suffering from arthritis. He could he longer paint without pain in his hands and he could not get out and about to places of beauty and inspiration as he used to. For him there was no reason to live if he could no longer paint. I tried twice but was saved and my reasons were due to not seeing my children for 13yrs and the abuse I had suffered at the hands of my ex- husband. Am I therefore to believe that my ego was driving my thoughts and not despair, as I had believed? I have my children back and have forgiven my ex, and I would never consider self-destruction again. I love life and see a future even when I am in pain. Are these feelings of self-destruction due to the ego wishing for things to remain the same and not wanting change even if it means the body and mind will still be intact but facing life differently? If this is the reason then the ego has a stronger hold over our bodies and minds than I ever thought possible. Scary!! Blessings, Skydancer x Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , "chrism" <@ ...> wrote: > > Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of the > ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new person! - > blessings Iona. - chrism > > Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , iona winton > <ionaskydancer@ > wrote: > Yesterday I had a day similar to a few others on the list. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2009 Report Share Posted January 29, 2009 Julie, Please do go on. I was getting high listening to you. Must be that shamanic influence you have. Love John - Julie Friday, January 30, 2009 11:45 AM Re: Re: "Feeling Good" - Iona Iona,I will reply to this with Ms. Paula in mind. She will understand. As a cancer survivor at the age of 19, I often ruminate about those who would willingly take or think about taking their own life. When you are given a death sentence, your only thought is "to live", "to live every moment", to not understand those who have the choice to live, and choose to think about ending something as wonderful as the sky, the waters, the mountains, the beaches, the oceans, the trees, the forests, the PEOPLE, the animals, the flowers, the RAIN, the snow, the GRAPES, the watermelon, the love, the hope, the connection, the flame, the stars, the sun, the moon, the clouds, the birds.............can i go on? absolutely...........ask me.......namaste Julie--- On Thu, 1/29/09, Skydancer <ionaskydancer (AT) (DOT) co.uk> wrote: Skydancer <ionaskydancer (AT) (DOT) co.uk> Re: "Feeling Good" - Iona Date: Thursday, January 29, 2009, 6:23 PM Hi Chrism,I found your answer very interesting but it only led me to more questions regarding the ego and suicide. Many people at one time or another consider suicide/self- destruction, and many people carry it out successfully. I know of two friends and one past lover who died this way. I can believe my lovers reason was because of ego as he was an artist and suffering from arthritis. He could he longer paint without pain in his hands and he could not get out and about to places of beauty and inspiration as he used to. For him there was no reason to live if he could no longer paint.I tried twice but was saved and my reasons were due to not seeing my children for 13yrs and the abuse I had suffered at the hands of my ex-husband. Am I therefore to believe that my ego was driving my thoughts and not despair, as I had believed? I have my children back and have forgiven my ex, and I would never consider self-destruction again. I love life and see a future even when I am in pain. Are these feelings of self-destruction due to the ego wishing for things to remain the same and not wanting change even if it means the body and mind will still be intact but facing life differently? If this is the reason then the ego has a stronger hold over our bodies and minds than I ever thought possible.Scary!!Blessings, Skydancer x Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , "chrism" <@ ...> wrote:>> Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of the> ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new person! -> blessings Iona. - chrism> > Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , iona winton> <ionaskydancer@ > wrote:> Yesterday I had a day similar to a few others on the list.> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2009 Report Share Posted January 29, 2009 I read recently that suicide was the expression of not wanting to live life in this world of projection, but to transcend it. That becoming attached to the outside world and valuing its reflection as truth was the root of the problem. This person also stated that to do damage or destroy the physical body is a call to others to feel beyond thier projected illusions. Sometimes people are afraid to feel emotionally and do self abuse in attempt to feel something physically as " real. " This person was talking about why a teenager had sliced his wrist in an attempt of suicide. Anyways, this person's post resonated with me and with my own attempts at wanting to commit suicide. I never reached the point of physically carrying it out but was very close several times. It was like all that I valued here in the physical was being taken away and there was nothing left but emotional pain. After a while that gradually switched over to feeling hardly any emotion at all and a feeling of no connection or reason to continue here. Reaching that point is really a horrible feeling. Life felt meaningless, like I didn't belong here any longer and that the world would be a better place if I was not here. I felt like I was dragging those around me down and that they would have a better life if I was not a part of it. Linda , Julie <jewelport wrote: > > Iona, > I will reply to this with Ms. Paula in mind. She will understand. As a cancer survivor at the age of 19, I often ruminate about those who would willingly take or think about taking their own life. When you are given a death sentence, your only thought is " to live " , " to live every moment " , to not understand those who have the choice to live, and choose to think about ending something as wonderful as the sky, the waters, the mountains, the beaches, the oceans, the trees, the forests, the PEOPLE, the animals, the flowers, the RAIN, the snow, the GRAPES, the watermelon, the love, the hope, the connection, the flame, the stars, the sun, the moon, the clouds, the birds.............can i go on? absolutely...........ask me.......namaste > > Julie > > --- On Thu, 1/29/09, Skydancer <ionaskydancer wrote: > Skydancer <ionaskydancer > Re: " Feeling Good " - Iona > > Thursday, January 29, 2009, 6:23 PM > Hi Chrism, > Are these feelings of self-destruction due to the ego wishing for > > things to remain the same and not wanting change even if it means the > > body and mind will still be intact but facing life differently? If > > this is the reason then the ego has a stronger hold over our bodies > > and minds than I ever thought possible. > > > > Scary!! > > > > Blessings, Skydancer x > > > > Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , " chrism " > > <@ ...> wrote: > > > > > > Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of > > the > > > ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new > > person! - > > > blessings Iona. - chrism Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 30, 2009 Report Share Posted January 30, 2009 Miss Linda,My heart seems to be almost bursting with LOVE for you, beautiful child of God..........Julie--- On Thu, 1/29/09, Linda <crazycats711 wrote:Linda <crazycats711 Re: "Feeling Good" - Iona Date: Thursday, January 29, 2009, 10:01 PM I read recently that suicide was the expression of not wanting to live life in this world of projection, but to transcend it. That becoming attached to the outside world and valuing its reflection as truth was the root of the problem. This person also stated that to do damage or destroy the physical body is a call to others to feel beyond thier projected illusions. Sometimes people are afraid to feel emotionally and do self abuse in attempt to feel something physically as "real." This person was talking about why a teenager had sliced his wrist in an attempt of suicide. Anyways, this person's post resonated with me and with my own attempts at wanting to commit suicide. I never reached the point of physically carrying it out but was very close several times. It was like all that I valued here in the physical was being taken away and there was nothing left but emotional pain. After a while that gradually switched over to feeling hardly any emotion at all and a feeling of no connection or reason to continue here. Reaching that point is really a horrible feeling. Life felt meaningless, like I didn't belong here any longer and that the world would be a better place if I was not here. I felt like I was dragging those around me down and that they would have a better life if I was not a part of it. Linda Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , Julie <jewelport@. ..> wrote: > > Iona, > I will reply to this with Ms. Paula in mind. She will understand. As a cancer survivor at the age of 19, I often ruminate about those who would willingly take or think about taking their own life. When you are given a death sentence, your only thought is "to live", "to live every moment", to not understand those who have the choice to live, and choose to think about ending something as wonderful as the sky, the waters, the mountains, the beaches, the oceans, the trees, the forests, the PEOPLE, the animals, the flowers, the RAIN, the snow, the GRAPES, the watermelon, the love, the hope, the connection, the flame, the stars, the sun, the moon, the clouds, the birds....... ......can i go on? absolutely.. ......... ask me.......namaste > > Julie > > --- On Thu, 1/29/09, Skydancer <ionaskydancer@ ...> wrote: > Skydancer <ionaskydancer@ ...> > [Kundalini-Awakenin g-Systems- 1] Re: "Feeling Good" - Iona > Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 > Thursday, January 29, 2009, 6:23 PM > Hi Chrism, > Are these feelings of self-destruction due to the ego wishing for > > things to remain the same and not wanting change even if it means the > > body and mind will still be intact but facing life differently? If > > this is the reason then the ego has a stronger hold over our bodies > > and minds than I ever thought possible. > > > > Scary!! > > > > Blessings, Skydancer x > > > > Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , "chrism" > > <@ ...> wrote: > > > > > > Part of the feelings of self destruction come from the aspects of > > the > > > ego that are falling away. So in a real sense you are a new > > person! - > > > blessings Iona. - chrism Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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