2 Questions. . .sparrow synthesis. . .

May 11, 2009

Namaste

dear Nina. . . hope you are feeling better and this day has been

beautiful for you. . .

(sorry this is too long and too much about me. . . and too ramblings. .

..and hesitate to share. . . but i am going to push the send button none

the less dear friends. . . )

Nina i went to sleep thinking about your questions last night. . .and

woke up this morning with the question continuing to bring in many

pieces from different planes of times and experiences. . .often times

with this being one of them i allowed the pieces and different levels

to emerge and when they present themselves there comes the synthesis. .

.. it is always difficult for me to find the language to express the

process and synthesis. . . i have absolutely no inkling or projection

that what emerged fits you are not. . .for the revealing directly

related to what Kundalini Ma has along the way. . .but i will share a

small bit of the journey your questions took me into and with its

challenge to attempt communicate the synthesis. . .

a bit of background. . . on the Child of Matter. . . .

my birth mother left at birth due to illness. . . i was a failure to

thrive baby for the first 10 months and was force fed for the first ten

months. . .the caretakers where seven older siblings and our elderly

rural neighbors. . . one day around ten months an older sister set me

down outside of a coral. . .psychologist would probably dispute the

ability to have recall at this age, but there is full recall of the

experience. . . first memory was looking into two huge eyes of a big red

horse. . .and in that moment i came alive as a cord of energy zipped up

from the stomach into the heart of the lead mare, Filly. . . felt the

energetic pull and was mesmerized with attempt to reach for her. . .my

sister pulled me back and i threw a tantrum. . .because of the reaction

the family started placing me on Filly's back for feeding . . . i

started thriving and Filly became the psychological mother. . .by two

years old had learned to climb a wood rail fence and Filly would come

up from the pasture and lean close so i could climb on her back. . .she

would take me down into the pastures with the rest of the herd and that

is where i learned first language. . .my Mother tongue was the

energetic world. . .as a baby had been touch phobic so there had not

been regular body bonding. . .i was swallowed whole by Mother Nature and

bonded with her and she takes in everything and extends without

boundary. . .because of this early bonding i knew early separation is an

illusion. . . sometimes i wonder about Shakti. . . is She a gift of

evolution or is She something precious we have de-evolved away from?.

.. .Is She our original birthright, the part of us that is Nature? I

think so. . .Shakti has taught i am a Child of Matter as well as a

Child of Spirit. . . and Her teachings have been a process of gradually

bringing to awareness the Oneness of our beingness, in both the world

of Matter and the world of Spirit. . .

Shakti taught the child through Filly the heart is not bound by

distance or separation. . .i would go sit on the fence and she would be

down in the pasture, the heart would open up with love and longing for

her " mother " . . .and up from the pasture with the herd following behind

she would come to get me. . . learned early we live in an energetic

world and Mother Earth holds the energetic history just like our bodies

hold the energetic history . . .for we are one with Mother Earth as her

children . . . for many years there was suffering because i thought

everything being taken in was my own personal energetic. . . i was

buried in an ache that did not make sense. . . although i coped well in

the world underneath i hurt. . .

then in the mid eighties was a practicing psychotherapist. . .and a

phenomena began to occur in the offices all across the Western world. .

..you probably remember the sensational phenomena of ritual abuse. . . .

predominately women where flooding the offices of therapist with

horrendous stories of Satanic ritual abuse. . .As a young therapist i

had many questions. . . had specialized in trauma therapy and had been

taught the importance of believing the stories of abuse, and at the same

time therapist where being accused of instigating false memories in

clients. . . it was a bit like walking on egg shells. . .for about three

years i heard many horrendous stories. . . then began to have terrible

nightmares of my own. . .knew i had not gone through spiritual abuse,

and also knew i was open to the collective unconscious realms because of

the childhood bonding with the Great Mother. . .so made a conscious

decision to claim it and take it on as my own. . . i plunged into the

darkness for seven years . . . do not have words to describe the

darkness of those years and the depth of anguish. . . a year during

that period became very suicidal and truly by the grace of Kundalini

Ma there was the allowance of survival. . . for seven years i was

immersed in the collective unconscious memory of the feminine soul,

Native lineage history, and the degradation of Mother Earth in the hands

of the patriarchal " spirit of domination " for thousands of years. . .

..Without knowing what it was i lived within it for years. . . now

know i had opened to the what Eckhart Tolle calls the " pain body " . . .

he states suggest we do not need to go into it. . .but i did. . . for

did not know any better. . .in every cell of the body was the ancient

story. . . the personal as well as collective. . . .the memories where

trapped in the body and i spent a lot of time curled up in a contracted

fetal position releasing the memories through the body. . . ended up

going inpatient to Denver Colorado to a specialist that worked with

trauma and for seven weeks was placed in physical constraints for

several hours each day so the body would not curl up and go into

convulsion because of the depth of contraction and i released the blocks

through the expression of feelings, there where layer upon layer of

ancient fear. . .and looking back i suspect this was all stored in the

tribal reservoir of the root chakra?

during those years lessons emerged and where synthesized into seven

major lessons . . .after the seventh lesson came forth there was a

wonderful sense of release and clearing. . .then a couple of weeks after

the final lesson something beautiful occurred. . . i had been going

out and sitting each day with a herd of Holstein cattle and was

playing. . .i would breath love through the heart to each one of them,

and they would one by one come up and lick the hand, then they would be

given a sacred name. . .with Bessie, cow number 99, while breathing

love through the heart, all the sudden the love i had been sending them

each day came bouncing back into the heart and was magnified many fold.

.. .it was such a tender beautiful experience and then felt the gentle

weaving of the ida and pingala up from the root to the sixth chakra. . .

that is when i say i began the internal kundalini awakening but the

energetic was present since first memory, but at the time i did not have

a language for it and was not aware of the chakras or Eastern

spirituality. . .that day in November of 1991 was deep transformation

and was released from the past and a whole new world opened. . .once i

opened to Eastern spirituality it was obvious the lessons where release

of the collective unconscious of the blocks in each of the seven

chakras. . .another thing that happened with the release is not only

was there individual release but the women and therapist i had traveled

the psychological journey with for those years also received significant

release at the occurrence. . i hesitate to share this for it seems

grandiose. . .but it was validated by the healers and i chose to share

it for i want to share, in the realm of Kundalini Ma she shows we

are connected to the greater whole and when we heal we also become a

vessel of healing that impacts and brings healing for the whole. .

..Amma, my teacher has said when we go through deep spiritual

transformation (aka kundalini awakening) our healing effects three

generations before us and four generations after us. . .many times that

awareness keeps me motivated. . .in this life there has always been a

sense this life was not for me at a personal level but was for

something greater . . .do others of you feel that way sometimes?. . ..

this is a bit of how i have synthesized this period of the journey. .

..the " pain body " the immersion into the collective was a trip into the

world of maya. . .matter also has its " oneness " . . .everything thing is

there and we can open to it. . .for me that is the karmic world. . .the

world of cause and effect. . . it is an illusionary world that has

experience but it can never truly define who we truly are, even

though it is an intense world of material experience. . . .real but

Unreal. . .

the Child of Spirit. . .

after the immersion in the oneness of Matter. . . Kundalini Ma began to

show i was also a Child of Spirit. . .and in the realm of Spirit the

bonds of karma are dissolved by the Oneness of Spirit which i

experience as grace and divine love. . . after years of delving into the

psychological realized i needed to move from karma to grace. . .and

for me grace is not found in the past, but rather the present. . . my

past belongs to the Child of Matter whereas the Child of Spirit lives

fully in the present. . . there is a growing realization i cannot

serve two Masters. . . .Kundalini Ma has shown instead of identifying

with the action found in duality such as the polarity found in yin/yang,

light/dark, me/not me. . . .and on and on. . .my identification needs to

be with the circle that contains all polarities. . .

i entered Kundalini Ma by way the past and the karmic and did deep

clearing and cleansing work and it was the hard way. . .and it came so

close to killing me. . . nowadays i sometimes visit the past to harvest

the lessons , but i no longer live there. . . the patterns of the past

will always be imprinted in my karmic world and they can be brought to

awareness and there is some healing but in truth the past will never

be truly healed or erased. . .but can only be transcended. . . it seems

to be a dance each of us must figure out when it is time to let go of

the unreal world and move to the real world. . .

Nina for me it truly has been a pilgrimage that leads to the world that

transcends karma. . .i did it the hard way and believe wisely

shows the more gentle path. . . one does not have to swim in the karmic

world as i did in my unknowing. . . the karmic world can only be

transcended by love, light, forgiveness, and gratitude such as Chrism

illuminates with the safeties i believe this is the realm of the

Child of Spirit. . .every moment we dwell in love and light we share

the Oneness of Truth and in that holding space love and light enters

creation through us. . .

i have found one short cut that is profound and simple. . . this one i

can testify with certainity. . .it is impossible to call on the Holy

Spirit (which i believe is another name for Kundalini Ma) and not

receive assistance. . .it is the function and purpose of the Holy Spirit

to guide and be there for us in the fullest and most loving manner. .

..always She has our highest good. . . we are given free will so we have

to give permission and ask for guidance. . .there has never been a time

when i asked for assistance that a transformation has not occured. .

..often times times the external situation looks the same, but the mind

and heart will be lifted and transformed to a place of peace, acceptance

and a fresh perspective. . . i believe in the Course of Miracles this is

the ever present miracle that is waiting for us in every situation. .

..the Child of Spirit has learned to transcend the karmic world by

calling on the grace which is greater than the egoic mind that wants to

figure it out. . . and this is something that can quickly take us from

fear to love. . .the most powerful words i know are " Come Holy Spirt "

or " Come Holy Mother " lift me to your heart and to your mind. . .it is

that simple. .. . .from fear to love. . .

thanks to the ones that have tried to follow this ramble . . .and for

the allowance of revealing and sharing of the experiential . . . this is

an attempt frame a bit of the journey and others may have very different

ways of conceptualizing their own experience. . .and as always honor to

each and all. . .in our unity and uniqueness.. . .

may your day be blessed with goodness

ordinary sparrow

, " framestone68 "

<framestone68 wrote:

>

> Hi Kundalini Peoples.

>

> My K works much in my mind and emotional body the last few weeks. She

gave me some flu to stay in bed one week. It is much easier to get some

attention from me when I am still. (She knows all about you). I got

some very old scares on my neck in my astral body. I think it is from

previous lifetime, maybe I get killed by a knife or hanged, something

like that... Now K is stuck there and I do not know how to release her.

I do yoga, meditate and trying to look at my thoughts, but I think it is

something deeper to look at. Now it is start to hurt in my physical

body. Any suggestions how to release the K-flow?

>

> And I have another issue, when I am at the subway or work or anywhere

I am in contact with people sometimes my third eye start to ache, it get

very active. I wonder what happens, what will the third eye tell me, a

warning? Is it bad or god? Do I miss something important?

> I f someone has any thoughts about I will be grateful.

>

> Let you all be safe and get prosperity, love and bliss… and thanks

for this beautiful world as pulsating under our feet… and

Chrism…and thanks for the sky and the air we breathe…

>

> Love & Life

> Nina R

>

May 11, 2009

ordinary sparrow- you are not ordinary at all- you are a glorious testament to

the wonders of the human soul transformed by Kundalini into an illuminous being-

thank you for sharing your experiences- i marvel at the complexities you have

encountered and mastered. - we all have different paths yet the sharing allows

us to see the totality of the journey -

i have been fortunate to date my journey has been one of ease and no trauma-

finding chrism has saved me much pain and doubt. we all enter the journey with

different baggage or knowledge-

your journey reads like a book and would make a beautiful movie - one day

perhaps -

thank you again - i am happy you are here to offer assistance to others who may

benefit from your events

..

Namaste

e

May 11, 2009

Hello Dear Ordinary Sparrow, sister of Kundalini.

Thank you my day is perfect, and I feel fine today. Hope your day is in peace

and harmony.

I will thank you for your devotion to share and to bring an important issue

abroad. I am glad that the question carried out such a lovely and beautiful

story. I do remember the dark 1980-19991. In Sweden we had the collective child

abuse going on here, everybody where suddenly victims of child abuse. I also

remember when the light come and released us from the collective mind going on

thing. I remember the youngster started to talk about themselves as me ¡V ego me

and that me shall have, the collective was over and the ego come out from the

closet.

These days everybody talking about to free the soul, but most of the people I

meet do not have the courage to leave the safe world of illusion ¡V as we know

in here, the freedom from maya have a price in suffering and aloneness. I have

read Eckhart Tolle and I understand collective unconscious memory of the

feminine soul. A friend of mine have problems to be open about her spiritual

travel because of the witch hunting , I understand that her DNA remember to be

accused as a witch when trying to help people. Some blocks Kundalini try to open

is from the collective thought system and is not always depending on me as a

person, but also the community I live in. Is that what you try to tell me

Ordinary Sparrow? The thought systems we get when we are child and that follows

from past life is something to be conscious about but not to identify with.

Tricky one. I think it is important to recognize all your belief system and

tell them adios.

Kundalini, the loving one, continue to breath gracefulness, count every leaf,

bless every living thing she sees and touch. Sometimes I got the feeling that

GOD is a child growing up and start to realize what it is. Sometimes I feel the

loving touch, joy and coziness from the spirit like it is a child, a very

intelligent and humorous spirit child.

My problems in my neck are released after two weeks, at last, maybe because I

asked the question. Who knows? ƒº

God spirit, prosperity, love and bless the sharing.

Love & life

Nina

May 11, 2009

Dear Ordinary Sparrow,

thank you for sharing your story so beautifully and honestly. Your words

continue to illuminate many aspects of experience and consciousness for me and I

am grateful for that.

love

Bruce

May 12, 2009

Namaste

dear Nina. . .

" Some blocks Kundalini try to open

is from the collective thought system and is not always depending on me

as a

person, but also the community I live in. Is that what you try to tell

me

Ordinary Sparrow? "

yes, i was trying to suggest. . . in the world of K Ma i have found in

the journey of realizing our Oneness we are challenged to shed many

layers both in the personal reality and the collective realms. . .

thanks for sharing about those years in your country it was validating

dear sister. . .also because the blocks you where experiencing where

above the heart and, it seemed to me it was the High Heart area and that

is the space where i really began to experience the interconnectedness

and Oneness in increasing degrees. . .and with the awareness that much

of the pain was not personal it was much easier for me to contain it and

hold it rather than it clutching me. . .

dear Nina. . .you said in a few words exactly what took me too many. . .

I love your words God is a growing child. . . i so agree. . . .and we

are all His/Her One child. . . .

love and light

ordinary sparrow

, " framestone68 "

<framestone68 wrote:

>

> Hello Dear Ordinary Sparrow, sister of Kundalini.

> Thank you my day is perfect, and I feel fine today. Hope your day is

in peace and harmony.

>

> I will thank you for your devotion to share and to bring an important

issue abroad. I am glad that the question carried out such a lovely and

beautiful story. I do remember the dark 1980-19991. In Sweden we had the

collective child abuse going on here, everybody where suddenly victims

of child abuse. I also remember when the light come and released us from

the collective mind going on thing. I remember the youngster started to

talk about themselves as me ¡V ego me and that me shall have, the

collective was over and the ego come out from the closet.

>

> These days everybody talking about to free the soul, but most of the

people I meet do not have the courage to leave the safe world of

illusion ¡V as we know in here, the freedom from maya have a price in

suffering and aloneness. I have read Eckhart Tolle and I understand

collective unconscious memory of the feminine soul. A friend of mine

have problems to be open about her spiritual travel because of the witch

hunting , I understand that her DNA remember to be accused as a witch

when trying to help people. Some blocks Kundalini try to open is from

the collective thought system and is not always depending on me as a

person, but also the community I live in. Is that what you try to tell

me Ordinary Sparrow? The thought systems we get when we are child and

that follows from past life is something to be conscious about but not

to identify with. Tricky one. I think it is important to recognize all

your belief system and tell them adios.

> Kundalini, the loving one, continue to breath gracefulness, count

every leaf, bless every living thing she sees and touch. Sometimes I got

the feeling that GOD is a child growing up and start to realize what it

is. Sometimes I feel the loving touch, joy and coziness from the spirit

like it is a child, a very intelligent and humorous spirit child.

>

> My problems in my neck are released after two weeks, at last, maybe

because I asked the question. Who knows? ƒº

> God spirit, prosperity, love and bless the sharing.

>

> Love & life

> Nina

>

May 12, 2009

Such a lovely and beautiful path Sparrow. Truly breath taking in its depth and

breadth of experience and karma. All I can do is nod in agreement.

We share many similarities of paths dear friend.

Your integrity and honesty reveal the teachings of Kundalini and of your karma

as a child of Kundalini in such blessed clarity that I honor these teachings you

offer as a staple resevoir of information for those who may come to explore or

to interpret their interest and experience of the Kundalini with in themselves.

- blessings and love to you Sparrow!

May 12, 2009

> i have found one short cut that is profound and simple. . . this one i

> can testify with certainity. . .it is impossible to call on the Holy

> Spirit (which i believe is another name for Kundalini Ma) and not

> receive assistance. . .it is the function and purpose of the Holy Spirit

> to guide and be there for us in the fullest and most loving manner. .

> .always She has our highest good. . . we are given free will so we have

> to give permission and ask for guidance. . .there has never been a time

> when i asked for assistance that a transformation has not occured. .

> .often times times the external situation looks the same, but the mind

> and heart will be lifted and transformed to a place of peace, acceptance

> and a fresh perspective. . . i believe in the Course of Miracles this is

> the ever present miracle that is waiting for us in every situation. .

> .the Child of Spirit has learned to transcend the karmic world by

> calling on the grace which is greater than the egoic mind that wants to

> figure it out. . . and this is something that can quickly take us from

> fear to love. . .the most powerful words i know are " Come Holy Spirt "

> or " Come Holy Mother " lift me to your heart and to your mind. . .it is

> that simple. .. . .from fear to love. . .

I have asked for help many times, for answers, for help, for transformation, and

the only thing I've come to is: do you (Shakti) really love me? and the

ultimate: who am i? I've received nothing, I've begged and pleaded to Her, and I

don't even think She's listening. I'm actually really wondering if she's even

here to help me. before I received the K, I was having deep spiritual

experiences where I actually felt the truth of the power of now. and this was

less than a year of starting meditation. And I felt joy for no reason. Since She

has activated in me it's been lonely, extremely lonely. For the first time in my

life, before K activated, I actually really enjoyed the company of my family, I

was actually becoming friends with them. then I move away, have my K activate

and loose my best friend in the process, come back home to regroup and it seems

I've already lost any sense of deep relationship with my family. I don't know, I

sometimes wonder if this is even a blessing...

craig

May 12, 2009

Thank you Chrism. . . .and i have sensed we have many similarities from

the path. . .

ordinary sparrow

, " chrism "

<> wrote:

>

> Such a lovely and beautiful path Sparrow. Truly breath taking in its

depth and breadth of experience and karma. All I can do is nod in

agreement.

>

> We share many similarities of paths dear friend.

>

> Your integrity and honesty reveal the teachings of Kundalini and of

your karma as a child of Kundalini in such blessed clarity that I honor

these teachings you offer as a staple resevoir of information for those

who may come to explore or to interpret their interest and experience of

the Kundalini with in themselves. - blessings and love to you Sparrow!

>

May 12, 2009

Namaste

Craig sorry you are having a dry spell. . .just a sharing of a few

thoughts. . . hope soon you will be open to that gifting of knowing She

is ALWAYS with you and ALWAYS working for your highest good. . .

listen carefully once you call on the Holy Spirit/Kundalini Ma. . .calm

the mind and listen. . .

Craig. . .is there anyone in your life that you have not forgiven?

including your self?

Sometimes the transformation is the embrace of " and this too " . . .and

there will not be the bliss and the " feel good " because a deep cleansing

is going on and bringing one into deep layers of acceptance and

surrender. . .

i have learned with Kundalini Ma to be open to anything, but do not

expect anything. . .as soon as i start putting expectations that

Kundalini is suppose to express a certain way then i have made the

mistake of turning Ma into another egoic graspment. . .She is here to

teach us to let go of attachments and grasping. . .i believe. . .

another very important factor to insure the awareness of the inner

connection with the Divine is service. . .no matter what. . . find one

place to serve everyday. . . if one keeps the door open to service. . .

..it will bring the communion with Her to a more immediate and accessible

relationship. . . .love and service without expectation of any return. .

.. service keeps us from living in a box that is too small. . .and will

truly bless you as much as the ones that are served. . .

just some thoughts. . .have faith. . .and trust dear brother. . . .She

will not fail you. . .you are her beloved son. . .and like one of my

teachers said, " adversity is just the shadow of the Mother's hand coming

to caress you. " . . .

keep calling on Her. . . . You are One with Her. . .

love and light

ordinary sparrow

, " kundaflame "

<kundaflame wrote:

>

> > i have found one short cut that is profound and simple. . . this one

i

> > can testify with certainity. . .it is impossible to call on the Holy

> > Spirit (which i believe is another name for Kundalini Ma) and not

> > receive assistance. . .it is the function and purpose of the Holy

Spirit

> > to guide and be there for us in the fullest and most loving manner.

..

> > .always She has our highest good. . . we are given free will so we

have

> > to give permission and ask for guidance. . .there has never been a

time

> > when i asked for assistance that a transformation has not occured. .

> > .often times times the external situation looks the same, but the

mind

> > and heart will be lifted and transformed to a place of peace,

acceptance

> > and a fresh perspective. . . i believe in the Course of Miracles

this is

> > the ever present miracle that is waiting for us in every situation.

..

> > .the Child of Spirit has learned to transcend the karmic world by

> > calling on the grace which is greater than the egoic mind that

wants to

> > figure it out. . . and this is something that can quickly take us

from

> > fear to love. . .the most powerful words i know are " Come Holy

Spirt "

> > or " Come Holy Mother " lift me to your heart and to your mind. . .it

is

> > that simple. .. . .from fear to love. . .

>

> I have asked for help many times, for answers, for help, for

transformation, and the only thing I've come to is: do you (Shakti)

really love me? and the ultimate: who am i? I've received nothing, I've

begged and pleaded to Her, and I don't even think She's listening. I'm

actually really wondering if she's even here to help me. before I

received the K, I was having deep spiritual experiences where I actually

felt the truth of the power of now. and this was less than a year of

starting meditation. And I felt joy for no reason. Since She has

activated in me it's been lonely, extremely lonely. For the first time

in my life, before K activated, I actually really enjoyed the company of

my family, I was actually becoming friends with them. then I move away,

have my K activate and loose my best friend in the process, come back

home to regroup and it seems I've already lost any sense of deep

relationship with my family. I don't know, I sometimes wonder if this is

even a blessing...

> craig

>

May 13, 2009

Dear Craig,

If we are to recieve the Holy Fire, we are going to be tested by fire..when i was activated, circumstances and events conspired to take me away from my family...the most precious for me..i had to come here in the USA to work..its been four years since the last time i was with my 6 beautiful sons. All we can do is to trust and have faith in the love of God because i believe that this union this oneness with the ALL will lead to much greater love to all that we hold dear in this world..

your brother in the path,

edgar

kundaflame <kundaflame Sent: Tuesday, May 12, 2009 7:50:17 PM Re: 2 Questions. . .sparrow synthesis. . .

> i have found one short cut that is profound and simple. . . this one i> can testify with certainity. . .it is impossible to call on the Holy> Spirit (which i believe is another name for Kundalini Ma) and not> receive assistance. . .it is the function and purpose of the Holy Spirit> to guide and be there for us in the fullest and most loving manner. .> .always She has our highest good. . . we are given free will so we have> to give permission and ask for guidance. . .there has never been a time > when i asked for assistance that a transformation has not occured. .> .often times times the external situation looks the same, but the mind> and heart will be lifted and transformed to a place of peace, acceptance> and a fresh perspective. . . i believe in the Course of Miracles this is> the ever present miracle that is waiting for us in every situation. .> .the

Child of Spirit has learned to transcend the karmic world by> calling on the grace which is greater than the egoic mind that wants to> figure it out. . . and this is something that can quickly take us from> fear to love. . .the most powerful words i know are "Come Holy Spirt"> or "Come Holy Mother" lift me to your heart and to your mind. . .it is> that simple. .. . .from fear to love. . .I have asked for help many times, for answers, for help, for transformation, and the only thing I've come to is: do you (Shakti) really love me? and the ultimate: who am i? I've received nothing, I've begged and pleaded to Her, and I don't even think She's listening. I'm actually really wondering if she's even here to help me. before I received the K, I was having deep spiritual experiences where I actually felt the truth of the power of now. and this was less than a year of starting meditation. And I felt joy for no reason.

Since She has activated in me it's been lonely, extremely lonely. For the first time in my life, before K activated, I actually really enjoyed the company of my family, I was actually becoming friends with them. then I move away, have my K activate and loose my best friend in the process, come back home to regroup and it seems I've already lost any sense of deep relationship with my family. I don't know, I sometimes wonder if this is even a blessing...craig

May 13, 2009

thank you dear Edgar,

it's weird, to finally know what it feels like to miss my family after so many

years of trying to get away from them (don't have kids of my own, only siblings

and parents), it was remarkable. I finally felt connection with the person that

gave birth to me and to a brother that I for so long shunned. But now my

feelings of connectedness have gone not only with them but with Spirit as well.

I'm trying to restore my connection with Spirit but don't exactly know how yet.

Right now I'm trying to see God in all of nature and beings, I figured that's a

good place to start...

craig

, Edgar Alan Elango

<Edgar_BNP wrote:

>

> Dear Craig,

>

> If we are to recieve the Holy Fire, we are going to be tested by fire..when i

was activated, circumstances and events conspired to take me away from my

family...the most precious for me..i had to come here in the USA to work..its

been four years since the last time i was with my 6 beautiful sons. All we can

do is to trust and have faith in the love of God because i believe that this

union this oneness with the ALL will lead to much greater love to all that we

hold dear in this world..

>

> your brother in the path,

> edgar

>

> ________________________________

> kundaflame <kundaflame

>

> Tuesday, May 12, 2009 7:50:17 PM

> Re: 2 Questions. . .sparrow

synthesis. . .

>

> i have found one short cut that is profound and simple. . . this one i

> > can testify with certainity. . .it is impossible to call on the Holy

> > Spirit (which i believe is another name for Kundalini Ma) and not

> > receive assistance. . .it is the function and purpose of the Holy Spirit

> > to guide and be there for us in the fullest and most loving manner. .

> > .always She has our highest good. . . we are given free will so we have

> > to give permission and ask for guidance. . .there has never been a time

> > when i asked for assistance that a transformation has not occured. .

> > .often times times the external situation looks the same, but the mind

> > and heart will be lifted and transformed to a place of peace, acceptance

> > and a fresh perspective. . . i believe in the Course of Miracles this is

> > the ever present miracle that is waiting for us in every situation. .

> > .the Child of Spirit has learned to transcend the karmic world by

> > calling on the grace which is greater than the egoic mind that wants to

> > figure it out. . . and this is something that can quickly take us from

> > fear to love. . .the most powerful words i know are " Come Holy Spirt "

> > or " Come Holy Mother " lift me to your heart and to your mind. . .it is

> > that simple. .. . .from fear to love. . .

>

> I have asked for help many times, for answers, for help, for transformation,

and the only thing I've come to is: do you (Shakti) really love me? and the