Guest guest Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Surrendering to Kali's Fire Chrism, Reading your reply, have realized I had not actually asked Kali how to proceed in all the visions she has appeared to me in recent weeks. The following is the last night's meditation/vision with Kali from my journal, that I thought I would share. For those of sensitive nature, this involves dismemberment and blood, Kali's modus operandi. I fell into a meditation/vision state, asked my power animal python to take me to the vision temple to initiate a visit with Kali. Python appears in her glistening black and silver skin, and whisks me off through the underworld entrance, through the tunnel and emerges in the temple pool and slithers up the steps with me on her back. I get off and stand there with Kali in front of me. She paces slowly around me, tapping her axehead in the other hand, exuding the the attitude of, 'what am i going to *do* with you, recalcitrant child?' i giggle a bit as it reminds me of a drill sergeant or stern military officer, but i know Kali's bark is worse than her bite. Well, sort of. I ask Kali to tell me what it is I need to do now, with the pulsating heat enveloping my hands and feet, caressing my body. She says i need to surrender to it, instead of thinking it apart from me, accept it IS in and of me, to put my surrender to the fire in writing--that will make it a real commitment. I agree and nod yes. This is something i have not quite wanted to do, to give all of myself to this process, my habitual fear of " commitment " clinging to me, using fear of 'what could happen' if i do, as cement. I always want an " out " in case i change my mind, not fully trusting. I offer my trust and my love to the process now. Kali takes her axe and slices my clothing down the front and rips it off, and then she throws me out into the rectangular pool in front of the temple, saying i need to cleanse myself in the waters. Cleanse yourself! Purify yourself! she calls. I'm floating on my back swimming backwards, so i can see Kali standing in the temple. Large amounts of blood start to squirt out of my body, over and over, filling the pool with sticky red blood. As huge amounts of blood squirt out rhythmically, like a squid purging itself of black poison, i am propelled backwards from the force. When the blood-purging ends, Kali calls me back to the temple, and i wade through the blood which comes up to my hips, covered from head to toe in thick red blood which clings to my skin like a shroud. I walk slowly up the stone temple steps as i am dripping slippery blood, and wait in front of Kali. She bends forward and licks the blood on my skin in long swipes of her red tongue, saying mmmmm this is good, this is sweet! smiling her Kali smile. Then tigers appear in the temple, some are golden and some are white. I stand in their midst as they circle me, coming closer they start to lick the blood off of my hands, legs, torso. I'm not afraid as i've become friends with East Wind and her brethren so I stand still and let them lick me without fear. They seem friendly enough. Then I'm watching this scene simultaneously from the sidelines and inside the action. Suddenly the tigers grab my legs and arms by teeth and claw, and pull me to the floor. One has my head in her jaws, holding it there for a minute, i can feel her teeth pressing into the skin of my head, hot prickly tongue on my cheek, and her hot purring breath moving rapidly in and out over my face and neck. I just wait, keeping still and calm, understanding yet another fear test/dismemberment is about to occur. They tear me apart in large chunks, growling and roaring, ripping off my head, arms and legs, clawing open my torso. The tigers chew and consume the flesh and viscera, then leisurely lie about to gnaw on the long arm and leg bones, play-fighting over them. Then when the bones are mostly clean of flesh, jackal-headed Anubis enters the circle of reclining tigers as they playfully chew on my bones. Anubis carries a large round grass or reed basket in which he gathers all my remaining chunks of flesh, torso, and takes the bones from the tigers, some of whom don't want to give them up and growl a bit at him and hang on to the bones with their teeth exposed, but finally release the bones to him. Anubis sets the basket of remains on the temple bench. Kali stands in front of the bench, performing some ritual over the basket, i don't recall what she is saying but she takes a gold jar of liquid, holy water? and sprinkles it over the bones. Kali then hurls fire from her hands at the basket, like orange-red lightning, and the basket's contents ignite in an intense fireball, quickly consuming the bones and flesh inside. The fire is huge and brilliant orange with yellow and white edges fluttering like feathers, flaring upwards suddenly and fiercely, roaring like the tigers. As the firestorm starts to fade, I wonder what next? Then I am suddenly standing reassembled and reborn in the remaining fire and ashes on the bench, rising up from a squatting position to standing upright with arms extended outward to the sides, my arms and back adorned with large wings of glistening feathers of a smoky brown topaz color with iridescent flashes like amethyst, dark citrine, labradorite and moonstone. I finally understand I am like the Phoenix, rising from ashes of the fire that consumed me. Namasté ~Delia " As below, so above; and as above so below. With this knowledge alone you may work miracles. And since all things exist in and emanate from the ONE Who is the ultimate Cause, so all things are born after their kind from this ONE. " ~The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus , " chrism " <> wrote: > > You could try that Delia. It may work it may also be that you will need to come into a conscious decision to become " at one " with the temperature. A surrender to what is being given. Not always will one be able to manipulate through a temperature but it does work some of the time so worth a try if you are ok with it and you feel Kali is ok with it. - my take on it. - chrism > > -- In , " idelos " <gypsy.eire@> wrote: > > > > Wow tonight my feet are pulsing and burning HOTTTTT! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 13, 2009 Report Share Posted June 13, 2009 Hi Delia!! And may I say " WOW WOW WOW " I don't think you have a problem with surrender!!!!! You stayed there without getting up and freaking out - blood squirting, tigers chewing on you, just WOW! I woke up during my wolves tearing me apart and they kept giving me many chances! haha This is one of my favorite dismemberment stories! I am so proud of you and I don't even know you! (: Your courage and surrender is so inspiring!! I loved reading this - I bow down to the surrender queen! I should say you passed that test! Oh...did I say " WOW? " ha Thank you so much for your writing - I shall remember this story when things go bump in the night! (: Deb P.s. WOW! , " idelos " <gypsy.eire wrote: > > Surrendering to Kali's Fire > > Chrism, > > Reading your reply, have realized I had not actually asked Kali how to proceed in all the visions she has appeared to me in recent weeks. The following is the last night's meditation/vision with Kali from my journal, that I thought I would share. For those of sensitive nature, this involves dismemberment and blood, Kali's modus operandi. > > I fell into a meditation/vision state, asked my power animal python to take me to the vision temple to initiate a visit with Kali. Python appears in her glistening black and silver skin, and whisks me off through the underworld entrance, through the tunnel and emerges in the temple pool and slithers up the steps with me on her back. I get off and stand there with Kali in front of me. She paces slowly around me, tapping her axehead in the other hand, exuding the the attitude of, 'what am i going to *do* with you, recalcitrant child?' i giggle a bit as it reminds me of a drill sergeant or stern military officer, but i know Kali's bark is worse than her bite. Well, sort of. > > I ask Kali to tell me what it is I need to do now, with the pulsating heat enveloping my hands and feet, caressing my body. She says i need to surrender to it, instead of thinking it apart from me, accept it IS in and of me, to put my surrender to the fire in writing--that will make it a real commitment. I agree and nod yes. This is something i have not quite wanted to do, to give all of myself to this process, my habitual fear of " commitment " clinging to me, using fear of 'what could happen' if i do, as cement. I always want an " out " in case i change my mind, not fully trusting. I offer my trust and my love to the process now. > > Kali takes her axe and slices my clothing down the front and rips it off, and then she throws me out into the rectangular pool in front of the temple, saying i need to cleanse myself in the waters. Cleanse yourself! Purify yourself! she calls. I'm floating on my back swimming backwards, so i can see Kali standing in the temple. Large amounts of blood start to squirt out of my body, over and over, filling the pool with sticky red blood. As huge amounts of blood squirt out rhythmically, like a squid purging itself of black poison, i am propelled backwards from the force. When the blood-purging ends, Kali calls me back to the temple, and i wade through the blood which comes up to my hips, covered from head to toe in thick red blood which clings to my skin like a shroud. > > I walk slowly up the stone temple steps as i am dripping slippery blood, and wait in front of Kali. She bends forward and licks the blood on my skin in long swipes of her red tongue, saying mmmmm this is good, this is sweet! smiling her Kali smile. Then tigers appear in the temple, some are golden and some are white. I stand in their midst as they circle me, coming closer they start to lick the blood off of my hands, legs, torso. I'm not afraid as i've become friends with East Wind and her brethren so I stand still and let them lick me without fear. They seem friendly enough. > > Then I'm watching this scene simultaneously from the sidelines and inside the action. Suddenly the tigers grab my legs and arms by teeth and claw, and pull me to the floor. One has my head in her jaws, holding it there for a minute, i can feel her teeth pressing into the skin of my head, hot prickly tongue on my cheek, and her hot purring breath moving rapidly in and out over my face and neck. I just wait, keeping still and calm, understanding yet another fear test/dismemberment is about to occur. They tear me apart in large chunks, growling and roaring, ripping off my head, arms and legs, clawing open my torso. The tigers chew and consume the flesh and viscera, then leisurely lie about to gnaw on the long arm and leg bones, play-fighting over them. Then when the bones are mostly clean of flesh, jackal-headed Anubis enters the circle of reclining tigers as they playfully chew on my bones. Anubis carries a large round grass or reed basket in which he gathers all my remaining chunks of flesh, torso, and takes the bones from the tigers, some of whom don't want to give them up and growl a bit at him and hang on to the bones with their teeth exposed, but finally release the bones to him. > > Anubis sets the basket of remains on the temple bench. Kali stands in front of the bench, performing some ritual over the basket, i don't recall what she is saying but she takes a gold jar of liquid, holy water? and sprinkles it over the bones. Kali then hurls fire from her hands at the basket, like orange-red lightning, and the basket's contents ignite in an intense fireball, quickly consuming the bones and flesh inside. The fire is huge and brilliant orange with yellow and white edges fluttering like feathers, flaring upwards suddenly and fiercely, roaring like the tigers. As the firestorm starts to fade, I wonder what next? Then I am suddenly standing reassembled and reborn in the remaining fire and ashes on the bench, rising up from a squatting position to standing upright with arms extended outward to the sides, my arms and back adorned with large wings of glistening feathers of a smoky brown topaz color with iridescent flashes like amethyst, dark citrine, labradorite and moonstone. I finally understand I am like the Phoenix, rising from ashes of the fire that consumed me. > > Namasté > > ~Delia > > " As below, so above; and as above so below. With this knowledge alone you may work miracles. And since all things exist in and emanate from the ONE Who is the ultimate Cause, so all things are born after their kind from this ONE. " ~The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus > > , " chrism " <@> wrote: > > > > You could try that Delia. It may work it may also be that you will need to come into a conscious decision to become " at one " with the temperature. A surrender to what is being given. Not always will one be able to manipulate through a temperature but it does work some of the time so worth a try if you are ok with it and you feel Kali is ok with it. - my take on it. - chrism > > > > -- In , " idelos " <gypsy.eire@> wrote: > > > > > > Wow tonight my feet are pulsing and burning HOTTTTT! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 WOW!!! Rubber on the road! Such composure, courage and calmness. Blessings to you. t ________________________________ idelos <gypsy.eire Saturday, June 13, 2009 6:42:34 PM Re: Burn, baby, burn: Surrendering to Kali's Fire Surrendering to Kali's Fire Chrism, Reading your reply, have realized I had not actually asked Kali how to proceed in all the visions she has appeared to me in recent weeks. The following is the last night's meditation/vision with Kali from my journal, that I thought I would share.. For those of sensitive nature, this involves dismemberment and blood, Kali's modus operandi. I fell into a meditation/vision state, asked my power animal python to take me to the vision temple to initiate a visit with Kali. Python appears in her glistening black and silver skin, and whisks me off through the underworld entrance, through the tunnel and emerges in the temple pool and slithers up the steps with me on her back. I get off and stand there with Kali in front of me. She paces slowly around me, tapping her axehead in the other hand, exuding the the attitude of, 'what am i going to *do* with you, recalcitrant child?' i giggle a bit as it reminds me of a drill sergeant or stern military officer, but i know Kali's bark is worse than her bite. Well, sort of. I ask Kali to tell me what it is I need to do now, with the pulsating heat enveloping my hands and feet, caressing my body. She says i need to surrender to it, instead of thinking it apart from me, accept it IS in and of me, to put my surrender to the fire in writing--that will make it a real commitment. I agree and nod yes. This is something i have not quite wanted to do, to give all of myself to this process, my habitual fear of " commitment " clinging to me, using fear of 'what could happen' if i do, as cement. I always want an " out " in case i change my mind, not fully trusting. I offer my trust and my love to the process now. Kali takes her axe and slices my clothing down the front and rips it off, and then she throws me out into the rectangular pool in front of the temple, saying i need to cleanse myself in the waters. Cleanse yourself! Purify yourself! she calls. I'm floating on my back swimming backwards, so i can see Kali standing in the temple. Large amounts of blood start to squirt out of my body, over and over, filling the pool with sticky red blood. As huge amounts of blood squirt out rhythmically, like a squid purging itself of black poison, i am propelled backwards from the force. When the blood-purging ends, Kali calls me back to the temple, and i wade through the blood which comes up to my hips, covered from head to toe in thick red blood which clings to my skin like a shroud. I walk slowly up the stone temple steps as i am dripping slippery blood, and wait in front of Kali. She bends forward and licks the blood on my skin in long swipes of her red tongue, saying mmmmm this is good, this is sweet! smiling her Kali smile. Then tigers appear in the temple, some are golden and some are white. I stand in their midst as they circle me, coming closer they start to lick the blood off of my hands, legs, torso. I'm not afraid as i've become friends with East Wind and her brethren so I stand still and let them lick me without fear. They seem friendly enough. Then I'm watching this scene simultaneously from the sidelines and inside the action. Suddenly the tigers grab my legs and arms by teeth and claw, and pull me to the floor. One has my head in her jaws, holding it there for a minute, i can feel her teeth pressing into the skin of my head, hot prickly tongue on my cheek, and her hot purring breath moving rapidly in and out over my face and neck. I just wait, keeping still and calm, understanding yet another fear test/dismemberment is about to occur. They tear me apart in large chunks, growling and roaring, ripping off my head, arms and legs, clawing open my torso. The tigers chew and consume the flesh and viscera, then leisurely lie about to gnaw on the long arm and leg bones, play-fighting over them. Then when the bones are mostly clean of flesh, jackal-headed Anubis enters the circle of reclining tigers as they playfully chew on my bones. Anubis carries a large round grass or reed basket in which he gathers all my remaining chunks of flesh, torso, and takes the bones from the tigers, some of whom don't want to give them up and growl a bit at him and hang on to the bones with their teeth exposed, but finally release the bones to him. Anubis sets the basket of remains on the temple bench. Kali stands in front of the bench, performing some ritual over the basket, i don't recall what she is saying but she takes a gold jar of liquid, holy water? and sprinkles it over the bones. Kali then hurls fire from her hands at the basket, like orange-red lightning, and the basket's contents ignite in an intense fireball, quickly consuming the bones and flesh inside. The fire is huge and brilliant orange with yellow and white edges fluttering like feathers, flaring upwards suddenly and fiercely, roaring like the tigers.. As the firestorm starts to fade, I wonder what next? Then I am suddenly standing reassembled and reborn in the remaining fire and ashes on the bench, rising up from a squatting position to standing upright with arms extended outward to the sides, my arms and back adorned with large wings of glistening feathers of a smoky brown topaz color with iridescent flashes like amethyst, dark citrine, labradorite and moonstone. I finally understand I am like the Phoenix, rising from ashes of the fire that consumed me. Namasté ~Delia " As below, so above; and as above so below. With this knowledge alone you may work miracles. And since all things exist in and emanate from the ONE Who is the ultimate Cause, so all things are born after their kind from this ONE. " ~The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , " chrism " <@ ....> wrote: > > You could try that Delia. It may work it may also be that you will need to come into a conscious decision to become " at one " with the temperature. A surrender to what is being given. Not always will one be able to manipulate through a temperature but it does work some of the time so worth a try if you are ok with it and you feel Kali is ok with it. - my take on it. - chrism > > -- In Kundalini-Awakening -Systems- 1 , " idelos " <gypsy.eire@ > wrote: > > > > Wow tonight my feet are pulsing and burning HOTTTTT! > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Dear Delia...WOW! I will remember this and how you did not flinch but surrendered to everything! I am only now learning that dismemberment and such, seems to be part of process... I guess that will be way way way down the road for me... I really hope so! Not at all ready for anything like that ... thank you so much though because I know I actually have no say in when and where and how so your example is inspirational. Love Julia. ________________________________ idelos <gypsy.eire Sunday, June 14, 2009 2:42:34 AM Re: Burn, baby, burn: Surrendering to Kali's Fire I fell into a meditation/vision state, asked my power animal python to take me to the vision temple to initiate a visit with Kali. Python appears in her glistening black and silver skin, and whisks me off through the underworld entrance, through the tunnel and emerges in the temple pool and slithers up the steps with me on her back. I get off and stand there with Kali in front of me. Recent Activity * 10 New Members * 39 New Photos * 1 New LinksVisit Your Group Give Back for Good Get inspired by a good cause. Y! Toolbar Get it Free! easy 1-click access to your groups. Start a group in 3 easy steps. Connect with others. .. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 14, 2009 Report Share Posted June 14, 2009 Delia you showed exemplary standards of fearlessness and surrender. Nice going! Thank you for posting your excellent example! - chrism Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2009 Report Share Posted June 15, 2009 Deb, Well, I *am* used to just laying there, LOL. Just kidding. I am just as surprised of readily accepting the, uh, extreme weirdness during these visions of Kali's tutelage. However, the events are merely symbols of surrendering of resistance to acceptance of the process, which is the real heart of the matter. I did request from Shakti a form that I could surrender to, who knew it would be Kali? Not me. But I've learned every time I admit to fear and resistance, and hit a wall, She's sure to show up quite soon with fear tests etc. That Girl is one efficient Divinity. Gets right down to business, all Fluffy Bunnies have been conscripted to serve as hasenfefer. In fact, my fears are akin to your thread of wanting to hide under the covers (that's me to a " T " ). Kali will rip off the covers, throw you out of bed on your arse and kick the living fear outta ya. Just doing her job, i guess. No hard feelings here. Ganesh will show up to comfort me. Like a cosmic Good Cop, Bad Cop. Or is that God Cop, Bad Cop? LOL I'm glad you enjoyed the vision, I hoped it wasn't too gruesome for readers... for me it was less traumatic than having dental work done, or other invasive medical procedures. I definitely prefer Dr. Kali... Namasté ~Delia " As below, so above; and as above so below. With this knowledge alone you may work miracles. And since all things exist in and emanate from the ONE Who is the ultimate Cause, so all things are born after their kind from this ONE. " ~The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus 777 " <flowerpowers7777 wrote: > > Hi Delia!! > And may I say " WOW WOW WOW " > I don't think you have a problem with surrender!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 15, 2009 Report Share Posted June 15, 2009 Cracking up so hard at this line ... can you hear me? You are a riot! Deb , " idelos " <gypsy.eire wrote: > > Deb, > > Well, I *am* used to just laying there, LOL. Just kidding. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Delia, I must say..WOW...what a descriptive experience. Your had all modalities to make it so real and it was like I was there. I haven't had a dismemberment dream 'yet' and I know I will sometime in this life time...just gotta go with the flow. I wish to know how you put yourself in such a meditative state that would present you with such an everlasting experience. I've been meditating for the last couple of years, however, most of it was intuitive, self taught, with no reference point on how to meditate (most of the time I would fall asleep). I would like to be at a point where I can consciously focus on my thoughts and then go down deeper while in meditation. I like to model after people that do things very well, and after reading your post, I wish to be at a level of meditative state that you experience. The simple question is..How do you do it? Be Well, Ernie , " idelos " <gypsy.eire wrote: > > Surrendering to Kali's Fire > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 19, 2009 Report Share Posted June 19, 2009 Ernie, Well, it's all still rather a mystery to me, LOL! I appreciate your feedback, good to know that visions have a shared quality. I recently realized retrospectively a lifelong tendency to go into a type of light trance state triggered by some stimuli, most often rhythmic sounds or movement or even a cool breeze. Last Summer I started going to a weekly meditation and healing circle at a local spiritual-metaphysical church, and the group activity seems to have coincided with an increased capacity for a deep meditative state as well as hair-trigger trance induction. Music with drumming, bells, gongs, chimes, rattles, also sound of trickling water, fans, weedwackers, lawnmowers, idling engines, whispering or low voices, pretty much anything can do it. With the meditation/visions of deities, I did not seek them. First Ganesh appeared to me while meditating, during the last shaktipat. He walked with me to this temple with a pool where I've had many subsequent visions. There have been spontaneous visions with Ganesh, his child form Bal Ganesh, Shiva, Shakti as Parvati, Eve wearing a snake, and most recently as Kali (in response to a request for Shakti to appear to me in a form I could surrender to). Except for once, these visions occur spontaneously without my initiating them, sometimes when I'm actually meditating but usually while I'm just minding my own business, and they just show up. Evenings when i'm listening to relaxation music is common. I started a monthly shamanic healing circle this Spring, which intensified the frequency of the meditation/visions outside the circle journeying with my power animal. In April, I took an object for the altar which represented an intention/request to " Cut away " anything I no longer needed--a flintknapped obsidian dagger. I didn't exactly SAY " bring it on " but my intention was taken as such, wow has it ever. Be careful what you ask for! :=O So Kali just shows up whenever to initiate these clearing/healing visions. I can be eating lunch, walking or even driving. She is Fierce! : ) So what I could suggest is perhaps take a shamanic healing class for learning journeying. Also, you could just put out a request for an appropriate deity form to appear to you, and if you have a specific intention that you wish to address, then state that intention as well, and see what happens. Perhaps Sundays with the prayer/meditation intentions of the group will help power your meditation experiences. You might start out by visualizing a sacred place where this deity will come to you, and go from there. Come to think of it, in meditations I usually go to a favorite place from memory or a dream, like sitting on a boulder in an ancient forest, a beach or a cool misty mountainside amongst fragrant pine trees. I have a lot of different music that I listen to for relaxation/meditation, but my hands-down favorite is Golden Spa Tones: Tibetan Singing Bowls with Flute and Ocean by Dean Evenson and Walter Makichen (Published by Soundings of the Planet). I can go to a really really still deep place with this CD. Good luck in your vision journeying, I'd love to read about your future meditation-visions! Namasté ~Delia " As below, so above; and as above so below. With this knowledge alone you may work miracles. And since all things exist in and emanate from the ONE Who is the ultimate Cause, so all things are born after their kind from this ONE. " ~The Emerald Tablet of Hermes Trismegistus , " boltonben111 " <erniebeneventi wrote: > I wish to know how you put yourself in such a meditative state that would present you with such an everlasting experience. I've been meditating for the last couple of years, however, most of it was intuitive, self taught, with no reference point on how to meditate (most of the time I would fall asleep). > I would like to be at a point where I can consciously focus on my thoughts and then go down deeper while in meditation. > I like to model after people that do things very well, and after reading your post, I wish to be at a level of meditative state that you experience. The simple question is..How do you do it? > > Be Well, > Ernie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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